Willing Surrender

by Hole, Carrie

  He rested his face in the crook of her neck while he held her shuddering body. His hold tightened as she quietly whispered in his ear, “I’m yours.”

  James woke to his phone alarm before dawn, quickly turning it off before it could wake Reina. He looked down at her sweeping wild curls away from her face. He wanted to stay against her warmth. She looked so vulnerable in her sleep, he wanted to wrap his body around her and protect her from the world. She seemed completely unaware of the powerful hold she had on him. She drew him like a beacon on an empty sea. Innocently her expressive eyes told him everything. Her every whimper and plea were like a siren's call; her every surrender was a balm to his soul. Her smile was like a light in the dark, leading him home.

  Chapter 15

  Waking up in a strange house was disconcerting, adding a new time zone to the equation did not help. Reina woke up alone in a bed not her own, James’ cologne still lingering in the air. She stretched languidly, inhaling the masculine scent. She considered wallowing in bed all day, but it didn’t hold quite the same appeal without James in it. She pulled on a t-shirt and shorts. Coffee first then shower, she thought. The house was incredibly quiet as she descended the stairs. It felt peculiar to walk around James’ quiet house alone. She wasn’t the nosey type, but the kitchen seemed like a safe enough place to poke around. The coffee pot was easy to find, beside it were a variety of creamers and a note.

  A maid comes twice a week. Here are a couple of numbers if you need anything delivered and a driver if you’d like to go out. I’ll try to show you around town this weekend. I’ll see you soon. James

  It was a bit discomforting to be outside of her comfort zone, to realize she couldn’t simply take a stroll to her favorite places. She generally didn’t venture out too far anyway, so she’d shelve it for now and worry about it when she got stir crazy. She peeked around in the cabinets and refrigerator; it looked a lot like hers, fruit, sandwich stuff, and even ice cream. Score! She sat on the island stool and drank a couple cups of coffee before wandering back upstairs. She grabbed her bathroom stuff and tucked them in the shower. She didn’t know how she felt about seeing her things in his space. It was only a few items, but it was strange. When the water was steamy she stepped in; resting her hands on the wall she let the hot water run down her back. Memories of James telling her to put her hands on the wall flashed through her mind, she snatched her hands back and washed her hair.

  Since she would be hanging around the house, she put on a comfy shirt and shorts as usual. She mostly spent the day adapting to her surroundings. She loved the view from the balcony and the fresh breeze flowing from the water. Pulling out her laptop, she eventually settled into the sunroom. Each window had shades so she could adjust the amount of light throughout the day. She worked for a few hours then napped on the soft leather couch, still trying to adjust to the time and location change. When she woke up the sunlight was beginning to fade. She made fresh coffee and decided to try out the sound system in the living room. She plugged her mp3 player into it and put on one of her random playlists, easy enough. She pulled her laptop back out and finished up what she had been working on, the music helping her creativity flow.

  As the evening slowly faded to night she heard the front door and watched James come in. She waited, trying to read his body language. She didn’t want to crowd his space if he’d had a rough day, and she didn’t exactly have a blueprint for her current situation. He smiled at her, dimples and all; she couldn’t help but bite her lip and smile back. Without thinking about it, she crossed the room, caressed the side of his neck, and gently grazed her lips across his. She felt a beat of fear in her heart, as her brain seemed to think that he felt like home; obviously she had her wires crossed. Then he was kissing her, “Wicked Game” by Chris Isaak quietly playing in the background, and none of it mattered as the world faded away.

  Over time Reina acclimated to her surroundings her life returned to a semblance of normal. She slept late, drank coffee, contacted clients, answered emails and worked on various projects. Business was steady, so she had plenty to keep her busy. When she got stir crazy she’d go to the market, wander around local stores and stop in a quaint coffee shop she’d come across. She ordered take-out, and even cooked a few of the recipes she was good at. She texted Amy pictures of places she visited, or called and chatted poolside. Amy would joke about being jealous and tease Reina about what James must be doing to her.

  On some weekends she and James would do things in the city. They visited museums and parks, tried out different restaurants, and sometimes just drove around looking at the variety of architecture. Other times were spent hanging around the house doing their thing. In the evenings and on weekends James had lines to memorize, phone calls to make and other business related things to deal with. Reina entertained herself with all the regular things, work, reading, soaking in the tub, swimming, and watching T.V. The nights were filled with passionate kisses, consuming desire, and warm embraces. Their schedules seemed to fit together seamlessly; their need for each other endless. For a while time seemed to both flow effortlessly and stand still for them.

  One lazy afternoon Reina felt restless while watching James over the edge of her book as he worked. She tried to be good, but feeling mischievous she decided to play. With a devilish glint in her eye, she sauntered into the kitchen and grabbed a cherry lollipop from her candy stash. James watched the sway of her hips as she walked out, but appeared to have not noticed when she returned. She settled back in her chair with her book, and began meticulously enjoying her treat. She put it in her mouth, swirled it around, and slowly slid it out. She spun it around on her tongue before slipping it back in her mouth. Lick, suck, swirl, and repeat. She could feel his eyes following her movements, completely relishing the tease, while maintaining the facade of being unaware.

  “Reina,” he called to her, voice strained.

  She tried for her most innocent expression. “What,” she asked, with a slight shrug of her shoulders. His eyes were smoldering, so she gave him a full demonstration of her candy sucking abilities. Lick, suck, swirl and repeat.

  “Reina, come here.”

  She smiled, bit her lip, gave a slight shake of her head, and kept right on licking all while maintaining eye contact.

  He leaned forward in his seat, “Reina, don’t make me come get you.”

  She laughed and stood up as if to go to him, but as he leaned farther towards her she took a step back.

  “Are you going to come and get me,” she laughed, and then she ran for the stairs. She made it to the second landing before he caught her and thoroughly rewarded her for bad behavior.

  Chapter 16

  For some reason there was an edgy quality to the day. Reina couldn’t put her finger on it, but she couldn’t seem to shake the feeling. She went for a swim to try to dispel her nervous energy. Afterwards, she took a shower to wash out the chlorine. Still feeling uneasy she decided to call Amy.

  “Hey lady, how’s the home life,” Amy answered.

  “Ha, ha. Not funny.”

  “What’s happening on your end of the world?”

  “I don’t know. Nothing really,” Reina answered, “feeling a little homesick today maybe.”

  “Homesick? If I was worshipping a man like that, homesick is the last thing I’d be.”

  Reina laughed, “Ok, you have me there.”

  “So, what is the status with the two of you anyway?”

  “I don’t have an answer to that question. The status is...good.”

  “You guys haven’t talked about it?”

  “Not in any kind of official capacity,” Reina scoffed.

  “Why not?”

  “It’s not a conversation I’m comfortable with starting, or having I guess.”

  “Has there been any love talk.”

  “No. That would be a definite no.”

  “Well, you seem happy; when we talk you sound happy. I say just be happy. Ride the happiness wave,” she giggled.


  “What would I do without you,” Reina asked.

  “You’d be completely lost of course,” Amy teased.

  Reina sat out on the balcony for a while looking out at the water letting the gentle breeze soothe her. Feeling a bit relieved she took a nap. When she woke up her sense of calm had returned; she wandered downstairs, put on some music, sat at the kitchen island, and pulled out her laptop. She was still there when she heard James come through the door; she turned on the stool and waited to see him appear in the hallway. As he noticed her and walked in her direction she sensed tension in his movements. She didn’t ask any questions, she stood up and embraced him, one hand soothing his neck while the other smoothed down the muscles of his back. He wrapped his arms around her, nuzzling his face into her neck inhaling her scent. As she felt him relax a bit he pulled back and grazed his thumb down her lips.

  “I missed you,” he said quietly.

  She touched his face as she looked up at him, trying to read him, wondering what had put him in this strange mood.

  Finally, he smiled at her, “Sit down, I have something for you.”

  She gave him a questioning look, but she sat back down on the stool.

  “I’ll be right back,” he said, touching her face.

  She watched him go upstairs, and waited, wondering what he was up to. A few minutes later he was back with a small box, which he held it out to her.

  “James, you have to stop with the gifts.”

  “Do I,” he asked. “Are you rejecting it?”

  He was looking at her so intently, that her smart-ass comment died on her lips. She shook her head and held out her hand. As she opened it her heart began an irregular beat. Nestled inside was a delicate cable chain necklace ending in diamond loops on each side, held together by a heart-shaped diamond lined lock.

  She didn’t know what to say. “James…”

  “Do you like it?”

  “It’s gorgeous.”

  “May I,” he asked, gesturing towards her neck.

  She nodded, “Yes.”

  She watched him from beneath her lashes as he reached around to unclasp her tile necklace, the whisper of his fingers across her skin causing tiny bursts of awareness. He slid the new chain around the back of her neck. Fastening the lock in the front, it settled just below the hollow of her throat. He traced his thumb up the front of her throat and across her jaw before he kissed her possessively. He ran his hands down her arms and pulled her wrists behind her back, she arched into him instinctively. She shivered as he leaned in and gave her a small bite on the neck.

  “So responsive,” he whispered in her ear, causing her to shiver again.

  He started to kiss her again and she nipped his bottom lip with a defiant gleam in her eye, he squeezed her wrists and bit her lip in return.

  “Do you trust me,” he asked, making her heart race.

  Did she trust him? That was a dangerous question. Trust was a bottomless pit of layers and she didn’t give any of them away easily, but she had already been living in his lair so obviously she did have a measure of trust in him.

  “Yes,” she replied quietly.

  He studied her eyes for a moment as if deciding something. Then he released her and stepped back.

  He held out his hand to her, “Come with me.” She took his hand and followed him upstairs.

  He led her to the end of the bed. “Stay here,” he commanded.

  He walked to the closet and grabbed the black scarves out of a drawer; bringing them back he tossed them on the bed and took off his shirt. Reina watched the movement with her eyes then looked back up at him, challenge met. He put his hand in her hair, and kissed her senseless, tongue slipping past her lips with promises of ravishment. He released her hair as his hands glided up her body pulling off her shirt and tossing it to the floor, bra following. He slid her shorts down her legs telling her to step out of them when he reached the bottom.

  “Get on the bed,” he instructed.

  His tone altered her breathing, her thoughts continuously teetering on testing his resolve. Her body was already humming with anticipation, but the devilish side of her considered baiting the tiger just for sport. She sat on the bed and inched backward as he stalked in after her.

  “Hold out your wrists.”

  She complied, entranced by the sight of him tying the end of a scarf securely around the bracelet on each wrist. He backed off the bed and prowled around to sit behind her.

  “Lift your hair.”

  She lifted her hair with both hands and twisted it, the scarves tickling across her skin with the movement. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched him fold a scarf over itself twice lengthwise.

  “Open your mouth,” he murmured near her ear. He put the scarf in her mouth, “bite.” She sank her teeth into the satin as he fed it through her upraised arms and tied it snugly.

  His hand briefly squeezed the back of her neck. “That’s good,” he breathed, clearly just as affected as she was.

  He bit her on the shoulder before standing up. “Lay down with your arms over your head.” She did, fanning her hair across the pillow. He tied the scarves on her wrists to the bed with enough leeway to bend her elbows comfortably and still allow access to her neck. Then he stood at the end of the bed looking down at her for a moment eyes fiery. He climbed on the bed and resting his weight on his arms hovered over her.

  “Don’t come until I tell you. Do you understand,” he demanded.

  Her breathing hitched, this didn’t seem like a game she could win. He stayed motionless, waiting for her response.

  “Yes,” he prompted.

  She nodded her head. His eyes took on a primal edge, causing her heart to beat in her throat. She had a feeling that this game had secret rules and she was about to learn them all.

  He rolled her nipples giving them a hard pinch before sucking each one into his mouth. He looked at her knowingly while she watched his mouth travel down her body followed by his hands, each touch rough and deliberate. He gripped her hip bones and rubbed his stubble across her lower stomach. She had trouble controlling her breathing simply by watching him, her sex wet and throbbing for contact. His eyes watched her as his thumb brushed the lightest touch across her wetness. Her eyes were locked to his; captured and hypnotized. He teased her swollen sex, the soft touches making her squirm for more contact. He held her hips tightly as he rubbed his face over her inner thighs. God help her, if she could she’d already be begging.

  A moan escaped her, body arching off the bed, as he sucked her clit into his hot mouth. He played her body like a symphony. Muffled whimpers and pleas escaping her, bowed body quaking. Her mind tried to hold it back while her body screamed for release, instinctively craving the carnal promise of pleasure. His eyes were feverish as he brought her to the edge only to stop with calming touches, hands gripping down her ribs, stubble against her thighs. Her entire world narrowed down to sensation, nothing existed but the desire to orgasm. Her hands gripped her restraints, her begging muted by satin, she was beyond control; she was his instrument to play.

  A warning tingled down her spine as he tormented her. She’d allowed herself to be lulled by his control, only this time he didn’t stop and it was too late. She couldn’t stop the intense waves washing over her. His mouth causing fire to rush through her veins, which completely consumed her. Even as the pleasure crested he didn’t stop and the intensity devoured her. Her head thrashed on the pillow as her body arched off the bed. He brought her right back to a devastating level of need. He nipped his way back up her body and she struggled to get closer as his mouth teased her neck. She was mindlessly desperate, squeezing his body with her knees, begging.

  “You didn’t follow the rules,” he whispered in her ear.

  Breathing erratic, she could only whimper in response. He skimmed his thumb across her cheek then trailed his hand down the front of her throat. He untied one of her wrists but held it in place for a moment.

  “Get on your knees,” he instructed,
and waited until she nodded before he released her.

  She rolled her shaking body to her knees, chest pressed to the bed, body arched, vulnerable. She closed her eyes as his hand caressed down her spine. He knelt beside her, one hand on her lower back as the other smacked her ass with two loud cracks. His hand smoothed over the area, the sting and heat going straight to every pleasure receptor her body possessed. His fingers slipped between her legs with a teasing circling of her clit before he repeated the process. She was lost, her body was no longer her own. James’ hands had become her anchor in a sea of need.

  His hand traveled back up her spine. She breathed raggedly as he untied the satin around her mouth. His body came over hers, hand tangling in her hair tugging her head back, he whispered in her ear.

  “Do you want me Reina?”

  Body shaking, she begged, “Please James.”

  He claimed her with deep hard thrusts, her entire being owned by pleasure. He’d branded her soul; there was no going back.

  After he untied her other wrist he eased beside her, hands soothing her with gentle caresses. Her body pushed to the limit, she drifted, still anchored by his hands. Beyond rational thought, she surrendered her heart to his safety net.

  James lay awake long after Reina had fallen asleep. He was completely ensnared by her; his thoughts in turmoil about the future. She was here for now, but only under the guise of a temporary arrangement. Would she stay here with him if he asked? He knew Reina well enough to know that if he brought up something she didn’t want to talk about she would shut down. If he broached a subject she wasn’t ready for she’d run.