by Ava May
I stood there stunned unbelieving of what I was hearing. There was no denying what he was feeling, and with each word that spilled from his lips my heart raced faster. I knew what he was talking about because I’d always felt it with him too, and it scared the hell out of me. I didn’t trust my judgment, and even though I knew he’d never physically hurt me, I couldn’t ignore the deep seeded fear of him breaking my heart. It wouldn’t just break, it would shatter. Women loved him, model like, stick thin Barbie’s, with the perfect tits and ass. Those were the types of girls that fawned all over him on a daily basis. I couldn’t compete with them. This chubby girl only had tits and ass. I wasn’t small. Even though for the most part I’d come to accept I’d never be tiny, I still didn’t love my body. I didn’t know if I ever would.
“What are you so afraid of?”
Chapter 3
“What are you so afraid of?”
The question repeated over and over again as I tried to decide it I would be honest and tell him. He gripped my fingers and tugged on my arm showing his impatience. “Are you going to help me out here, Brenna?”
“I…” I took a deep breath and licked my lips. “I’m not like the girls you’re normally with.”
He nodded. “Good. I don’t want you to be like them. Those aren’t the type of girls I want. They’re just easy.”
“Well, I’m not easy. Jacob is the only guy I’ve been with.”
Gabe’s eyes widened in surprise and I frowned. “It probably explains why I took all the shit I did with him. I thought I loved him. He was my first, and had that control over me. He was the first guy to like my body.” I realized then that was how he had such a hold on me. “God, I’m so stupid.”
Gabe glared at me. “You’re not stupid. You’re just a woman who doesn’t have the confidence she should. Your body is amazing. Your curves are capable of bringing any man to his knees. To me you’re perfect. I love everything about you. I’ve dreamed of tasting every inch of your delectable body. If only you’d let me.”
Heat rose to my cheeks with what he was saying. I wasn’t used to such bluntness. His sincerity made me want those things. “What happens when you get bored? I’d fall for you in a heartbeat, and I couldn’t handle you breaking my heart when you realize you want someone more exciting.”
He looked thoroughly offended and stepped back. “Do you really think I’d play you like that? That I’d say all this shit just to get in your pants and then drop you? I’ve had feelings for you since the beginning. They’ve grown over time, but I’ve already told you I don’t want you for your pussy. I want you for you. I want to be your man.”
“I don’t mean that you would go out of your way to hurt me, Gabriel.”
He stepped closer and lowered his voice. “What do you mean then, Brenna? Because right now it sounds like you’re pulling excuses out of your ass so you don’t have to really think about how you feel about me, and you’re afraid because you already know exactly what you’re feeling.” He gripped my hip and pulled me against him. “And it’s the same way I feel about you. I’m not going to run out on you.”
I gasped when I saw how serious he was. Normally he was laid back and was one of those guys who never seemed to take anything seriously. Now every word that he said raised my hopes. “I’m scared for more than that one reason, Gabe. What if our parents are less than happy though? I don’t want there to be an issue.”
He chuckled. “Maybe you should have a talk with your mom before you start worrying about that.”
“Why?”
“Talk to her.” Then his lips met mine in a soft kiss. There was no demands, no pressure, or no slip of the tongue; just a sweet toe curling kiss.
“I will,” I whispered when he pulled back and that was it. He nodded and left me alone in the tree house. I sat down and sighed. I was confused and aroused all at once. That was what he did to me. I shouldn’t have even been thinking about sex, not after my little visit from Jacob, but Gabe made me crazy, and it was for more than his sexy muscled body. Sure his body was incredible, but I loved his mind more. He knew how to challenge me.
“Well, now what the hell am I supposed to do?” I whispered in the silence.
* * * *
The next morning I woke up remembering Gabe’s parting words. I jumped out of bed and instantly regretted it. My ribs screamed in pain. I held my side and took a deep breath. When I gathered myself I went to look for my mom. I needed to know why Gabe told me to talk to her. She was in the kitchen singing to Shelby.
“Mom?”
She glanced at me. “Yes, sweetheart?”
“Can I talk to you—about something personal?”
“Sure, Brenna,” she replied and sat at the table giving me her full attention.
I sat down and fidgeted. She smiled at me.
“It’s okay to talk to me about it.”
“You know?”
“It’s about Gabriel, right?”
“How did you know?”
She waved a hand at me. “He’s talked to me, more than once I might add, and asked for my permission so to speak. I’ve been waiting for you to talk to me too. I’ve always known there was something between you both.”
“But you’re married to his dad.”
“Oh honey who cares? Really, how long has Gabriel even known Dennis was his dad? You two are adults and in no way related. I know some people might find something wrong with it, but I don’t. I just want you happy and away from that boy you’ve been seeing. He isn’t right for you.”
“Jacob?”
“Yeah him, you’ve changed because of him. You’ve lost your shine.”
“It’s over with him. I broke it off before I came home.”
She smiled. “Good!”
“So you’re really okay with it?”
“If it’s what you want.”
“Thanks mom, I’m not sure what I want exactly, but I wanted to get your opinion.”
She leaned forward and covered my hand. “You want my opinion?”
I nodded.
“I think he would be good for you, but you would be really good for him. He needs someone like you in his life. Someone to help calm his built up rage, and I can see how he is with you. He lights up when your name is mentioned.”
I teared up and nodded. “Thanks, mom.”
“Anytime honey.”
Shelby started screaming and mom looked at her and then back at me.
“Go ahead, we’re good here.”
Mom jumped up and went to the baby, and I sat back in shock. My only other fear wasn’t valid now. Mom gave her blessing, and Gabe had already shown me how he felt about me. There was no other excuse to stay away from him anymore. Did I want to take the chance and risk my already fragile heart on a man I’d been running from for the last two years?
Chapter 4
I needed to run. I did it every day. I may not have been the smallest girl in the world, but I was healthy. I took care of myself, and running was my addiction. I knew I probably shouldn’t with my ribs being injured but I had to. I laced my shoes and then stood stretching. It hurt, but I squared my shoulders and shook it off.
I started off slow and jogged down the street. The breeze blew my hair from my face, and I picked up my pace when the pain reliever kicked in. I wasn’t hurting so I took advantage of the medication. I turned up the music and let myself go. All the tension and stress left my body as I let my mind wander. When my breathing picked up I slowed a bit not wanting to wear myself out. I jogged to the trails and smiled when I passed an elderly couple holding hands.
That’s what I wanted. I wanted to be in love when I was old and gray. I’d known Jacob wasn’t the man for me, but I felt like I needed him. Now though I wondered why I let him hurt me. I was better than that. All the time I spent with him I shut everyone else. I had no friends really, and even my mom noticed I was different. I didn’t want to be that girl I was when I was with him. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to be the way I felt when he wasn’
t around clouding my judgment. It was almost like he had a spell on me, and Gabe helped break it.
Ah, Gabe. I looked forward to seeing him. After my talk with my mother I felt better about being with him, but I was still concerned. His life was full of groupies and parties, and that wasn’t me. I liked to have a good time, but I certainly wouldn’t like to see all those scantily dressed girls hanging off my man’s arm.
I wasn’t sure if I was ready for his world. He was one of the top fighters in the tri-state area. He had fans and people would literally stop him on the street. He was always under the limelight. Soon he’d be featured in the tabloids. Would I be able to handle all the rumors? I shook my head and kept running.
By the time I had ran the trails three times, I was still in no way ready to face him, but I was exhausted and sore. I slowed my pace and jogged home. Surely he’d be there now. I never kept my phone on while I was running and I didn’t bother to check to see if I’d missed any calls. I knew he’d be there waiting for me. He would expect some sort of answer for him, and even though I knew what I wanted, I wondered if I was brave enough to take what he was offering me.
I guess I’d find out.
I slowed to a walk when my house came into view. There on the porch was Gabe. He watched me coming but he didn’t move. I kept my face blank as I got my breathing back to normal.
I stopped on the grass and cocked my head at him before I lay on the grass and threw my arms out wide. He stood above me and shook his head.
“You shouldn’t have gone running with your injured ribs. How much did you run, five or six miles?”
I cracked my eye open and smirked. “Only six today, and I kept my pace decently slow.”
He sighed and plopped down next to me. “The parents are gone. They won’t be back for a couple of days. I guess my dad decided he wanted to go see my uncle and let Shelby meet the rest of the family.”
“Why now?”
He shrugged. “Your mom was awful smiley this morning when I came by. She told me you went running like three hours ago.”
“I needed to think.”
He scooted closer. “Did you figure anything particular out?” There was a hidden tone in his voice. He seemed leery and was digging without coming out and asking what he wanted to know, like he feared my answer.
“Maybe,” I said and sat up and bumped my shoulder to his. “Give me ten okay?”
“Okay.”
I kissed his cheek and stood. “I’ll be back.” Then I ran inside and grabbed my sexiest dress before going into the bathroom. The parents were gone and the house was empty, and I’d made my decision a few blocks before getting home. I was going to take the dive and hope I didn’t smack the pavement instead.
* * * *
I tied my hair back the way Gabe always said he liked it. I only put a light dusting of makeup on and tied the strings behind my neck. It was a short dress and fit like a glove. It was the one dress that even though amplified my curves, didn’t make me feel like I was hooch. The skirt stopped above my knees and it flared. It was halter so there was a nice amount of cleavage, but my breasts didn’t hang out or anything. He’d never seen the dress before, and I planned to knock him on his ass. He wanted me; he was going to get me.
I leaned in the mirror and smeared a thin layer of lip gloss to add a little shine and I was done. I sucked in a breath and stared at my reflection. “Don’t be a chicken, Brenna.”
With a short nod I took control of my emotions as I walked out into the kitchen. Gabe stood at the refrigerator and turned when I cleared my throat. He held a bottle of juice up to his mouth and it froze. His eyes widened and he tightened his grip on the container.
He put the lid on without taking his eyes off of me. “What the fuck,” he asked in a low voice. “Where have you been hiding that fucking dress?”
I didn’t think he meant to be so vulgar, but I’d learned early on it was just how he spoke. He shut the door and stalked towards me, stopping right in front on me. “I’m sorry, Brenna. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I replied, suddenly feeling nervous.
He took another step forward and I breathed in heavily. My body shook, but I didn’t think it was all nerves. He smelled really good, and the way he was looking at me was turning me on. Then he took another step. Our bodies brushed and I gasped.
I didn’t think I had it in me, but in one step I closed the distance and cupped his face, pulling his mouth to mine, and kissed him the way I’d always wanted to. He groaned against my lips, and I licked his bottom lip, loving how he shuddered. When he pulled back his dark eyes were even darker, and that’s when I saw it for the first time. Beyond the attraction, desire, and lust; I saw love and adoration. It took all the fear away.
I hauled him down the hall to my room and shut the door standing there for him. I wanted him and I could taste my need. “I’m ready, Gabe.”
He gulped and nodded starting to unbutton his shirt. I moved in front of him then and pushed his hands out of the way. My hands shook and my fingers slipped more than once, but one by one I undid each one of those buttons and slid his shirt off of his broad shoulders. He was beautiful. Every part of his body was made of muscle. I ran my finger down the front of his body and let it lingers at the waist of his shorts. “Take them off.”
Now I wasn’t the nervous one, he was. He nodded and pushed me back some while he quickly took his shorts off. He was completely naked and I gulped when I saw the size of his erection. He was big, and he was really ready for me.
“Hey, it’s okay, we don’t have to—today.”
I looked up from his cock and smiled. “I want to. I’m just a little nervous.”
He moved behind me and kissed each shoulder and untied the thin strings of fabric holding the dress up. He ran his fingers down every visible inch of bare skin. “You aren’t wearing a bra.” And I shuddered by the tone of his voice. It was deep and raw, choked like he was struggling to form his words.
“Nope,” I replied, letting the word pop.
I felt his lips and he knelt behind me kissing his way down my spine and pulling the dress. I helped and let the fabric slide down the front of my body. My breasts ached to be touched, and feeling brave, I massaged my nipple, moaning when I realized it felt good. He froze and stood spinning me to face him. I stopped touching myself but he shook his head.
“No, don’t stop.”
I blushed but ran my fingers over my nipples, and then, because of the look on his face, I slid my other hand down my now bare stomach, all the way to the line of my panties. When my finger brushed the lace, I held it there and watched his eyes stare at my hand and lick his lips.
I slipped my finger beneath my panties and spread my legs. When I rubbed my slick pussy, I moaned and threw my head back. I’d never really touched myself before and enjoyed it, but with Gabe watching, it turned me on more than I thought possible. I lifted my head and watched at him. He shook his head and groaned when I teased my nipple. Then he was there in front of me sliding my dress down my legs the rest of the way, kneeling in front of me. His face was right in front of my panties, and when he ran his tongue on the damp fabric, I nearly jumped out of my skin.
He pressed his tongue against me, and I moaned. He slid my panties down my thick thighs and helped me step out of them, and then his hand covered mine guiding me and rubbing circles on my clit. I spread my legs further to open up further for him. He licked his lips and then he moved his head in the way, but I felt his lips kiss me there and my legs turned to jelly, but he wasn’t done. Running his tongue along my slit, he added pressure.
I grabbed his hair and yanked him back. “I can’t stand with you doing that.”
He nodded and then stood, lifting me in his arms. He was strong and laid me on the bed. Without a word he spread my legs and crawled between them. His fingers dug into my thighs, and he licked me out thoroughly. When I squeezed my thighs around his head he sped up, bringing me over the edge. I moaned and then screamed when he bi
t my clit. My orgasm washed over his tongue, but he didn’t stop. He took everything I gave him and held my hips still so I couldn’t get away. The sensations were too much, and I needed him to stop.
I started laughing. “Stop! Please, I can’t take any more.”
He lifted his head chuckling and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. The evidence of my orgasm glistened on his lips. When he hovered over me and kissed me I thought it would gross me out, but when I tasted myself on his tongue it turned me on again. I pulled back and stared him straight in the eyes. “Make love to me, Gabriel.”
“No better words have ever been spoken by those luscious lips.” He kissed me again, and I closed my eyes. When he climbed off of the bed I watched as he rolled on protection. Then he jumped on the bed and caged me between the safety of his arms. I couldn’t lie, it hurt a bit, but when he was fully inside of me, I felt something I never had before. He took his time and showed me how I was supposed to be treated. The way a man who loved a woman did, and he certainly made love to my body. The whole time telling me how beautiful I was and how happy he was that I was his.
When he came I discretely wiped away a tear. Never before had I felt so cherished. That night Gabriel Baxter stole my heart.
Chapter 5
Waking up next to Gabe was different. He held me all night, and when I woke up to get a drink of water he sat up instantly worried. It was sweet. It was then I realized he was just as insecure as I was only about different things. I came back to bed and smiled when I saw the sheet covered him, barely. His bare chest rose heavily. His eyes were closed, and he looked more relaxed than I’d ever seen him. He looked like he was at peace, and I didn’t want to wake him so I tiptoed out into the living room and pulled the small throw around my shoulders and sat on the couch. I turned on the TV and flipped mindlessly through the channels. Nothing was on, but I was wide awake.