by Kahlen Aymes
I glanced at my phone to check for the time. “I should probably get back. There is a big get together tomorrow night after the funeral, and I’m sure there is a lot to do.”
“I know. We’re all coming. If it’s okay, I’m going to bring my kids? They always loved Leonard’s get-togethers. They love the pool.”
“Oh, of course.”
“I think Gunner and Ellie are coming with their kids, too. Gunner’s parents will no doubt be there.”
“Everyone is welcome.”
I paid the bill and then took Ari back to the parking lot of the funeral home and her car. “I’ll see you tomorrow night, then. Keep your chin up, honey.”
I will. I leaned over and hugged her.
It didn’t take long and I was out of town and once again tearing down the dirt road to the ranch. I was emotional after seeing my uncle’s body. He looked peaceful, but I was filled with sorrow that I didn’t spend more time with him. And with River; he had me questioning my decision to leave Texas in the first place. I did love the ranch, I loved Star, and I loved River. I tried to rationalize that my emotions were sensitive due only to Uncle Leonard’s death, but in reality, it was everything.
Marina’s shoe was conspicuously missing from the dirt outside the gate. I wondered if River had brought her out to get it. I resented every minute she spent with him, and I couldn’t fucking stand that idiot, Suzy Welling. She’d sure made herself at home in my house, which made it obvious to me there was something between them. What the hell was I going to do?
I was happy for River. He deserved the ranch, and I could get millions for the house and the fifteen acres that it was built on . . . even if River had to pay me over time, that was fine. I didn’t even give a damn about the money.
When I arrived back at the ranch, I found Marina lounging by the pool and Suzy was gone. Thank God.
“Did you have fun riding?” She had a bright red bikini on, her hair in a topknot, and sunglasses covered her dark brown eyes as she lounged on one of the chaise lounges like an exotic offering to the sun. She sat up when she heard me approach.
“Hi! Yes, though I almost fell off twice! I bounced up and down like a rag doll. It was terrifying!”
It was hot, and even the light clothing I had on was too much in this heat. I sat down next to her. “How was River?”
“Cranky. He was a gentleman, don’t get me wrong, but he seemed rushed.”
“He has a lot to do. This place is a huge responsibility.”
“He certainly is gorgeous,” she observed, getting up and lowering the chair so she could climb back on to lie on her stomach. Her chin was resting on her hands and I could tell she was looking at me. “Maybe we need cowboys in New York.”
I dropped my head and looked at my hands in my lap. “He’ll never leave Texas.”
“Are you sorry you left Texas?”
“Sometimes. Modeling isn’t what I thought it would be. It’s really a seedy world and we’re basically slaves to the agency.”
“Sometimes it feels that way, but it’s so glamorous. I love the traveling.”
I shrugged. “I can take it or leave it.”
“It couldn’t be because you’re in love with the cowboy, could it?”
I was taken aback by her assumption. I’d been careful not to let her know how I felt about him.
When I didn’t speak, she continued. “Obviously, he’s a heartbreaker. That other woman who was here today? What was her name? Susan? She was lathering all over him.”
“Suzy.” I threw my legs up on the lounger. “I’m not sure what their relationship is.” Ari’s words repeated in my head. “Maybe they’re sex friends. She seems too mindless for him to take her seriously.” I tried to keep emotion out of my voice.
“Obviously, there was something going on in the foyer this morning. What was it?”
I laid my head back and closed my eyes under the sunglasses, feeling the sun beat down on my skin. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Well, you better figure this out, Thea.”
“Everyone in this damn town knows more about what was going on with my uncle and this place than I do. River is mad that I went to New York three years ago.”
“Ahhh,” she said knowingly.
I decided I might as well tell her, because at least then, it would be one less woman flirting with River in front of me. “It’s first love bullshit,” I said.
“Oh, shit. That explains a lot. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because talking about it only digs up the pain, and I’ve learned to compartmentalize River and this place away from my career.”
“What happened?”
“He thinks I chose my career over him.”
“Didn’t you?”
I looked at her, perturbed at her words. “Whose side are you on, anyway? I didn’t see him giving up the ranch and moving to Park Avenue.”
She cocked her head, considering. “It’s hard not to be on his side, Thea. He’s all man. I mean he lifted me onto that horse like I weighed nothing. That’s so hot.”
“You do weigh nothing,” I said dryly, pushing down the twinge of jealousy.
“Whatever, you know what I mean. And he’s all opening doors and calling women ma’am. That is seriously attractive. He’s hard as a fucking rock.” My head snapped around to look at her. “I mean, when he lifted me up, I felt how solid he was.”
“We work with sexy men all the time, Marina.”
“Yeah, but so many of them are gay, and the cowboy is cut because he works with his hands and his back. Just thinking about it, gets me hot.”
“He’s hot, alright. He melts me into a puddle. I’m here for less than twenty-four hours and I’m sitting here doubting my life choices.”
“I’d give it all up in a heartbeat for a man like that,” Marina said matter-of-factly. “Just sayin’.”
If only it were that easy.
Chapter Four
River
THE HOUSE AND YARD WERE teaming with people, and the backyard and pool were both bustling. There were so many people in attendance there were cars were parked down both sides of the lane and on the lawn around most of the buildings.
I had half a pig and forty pounds of brisket in the smoker. The aroma was incredible. Several of my friends and their families were here, as were just about everyone who ever knew or did business with Leonard Andreas. My parents, brothers and their families were here somewhere, too.
The funeral earlier in the morning had been brief, just the way Leonard would have wanted it. I sat by Thea and held her hand, and slid my arm around her waist at the cemetery when they lowered the casket into the ground next to Frita. She was quiet and crying a lot, but she held up pretty well.
I’d wanted to talk to her all day, but as soon as we got home, Suzy showed up and Thea changed her clothes and then took off on Star like a bat out of hell. That was five hours ago and I was starting to get worried.
“Where’s Thea?” Gunner Mathews asked. His wife, Ellie, was in the pool with their kids while Gunner sat on the stone half wall that was around the grill and smoker at one end of the large patio as I attended the meat.
“She’s riding her horse, but she’s been gone too long.”
Gunner knew the story. He knew how I’d always felt about Thea, and he knew how fucked up I was after she went to New York. I had copies of every magazine she had ever been in, and I saved all of her runway shows on Youtube. I stalked her on Instagram using a fake name. It was all so pathetic, but I couldn’t help it.
“Why don’t you just ask her to stay?” He took a swig from his longneck beer. “Grow a dick and tell her what you want, man.”
“I did that once. I told her I didn’t want her to leave, and she went anyway.”
I opened the grill and delicious smelling smoke billowed out. I picked up a bowl of sauce and mopped it on the surfaces of the meats inside.
“It’s a new day. Besides, she has the house and you have the ranch,” he s
uggested casually. “Sounds like the old man had a plan.”
“So what? She’ll probably just want to sell it to me.”
“Don’t buy it.” Gunner smirked slyly with a shrug.
I looked at him, considering. “She’ll just sell it to someone else.”
Gunner laughed. “River, for fuck’s sake.” He patted me on the shoulder and winked. “This is Mason. Not too many around who could afford this place, and if you don’t want it sold, just say the word, and no one will buy it. ” He winked and stood up. “I gotta go find my family.”
I stood there for a minute mindlessly mopping the meat as what he said sank in, unsure what to do next. He was right. If any loyalty were to be had between Thea and me, most of the town would side with me, no question.
“Hey, hon, do you need anything?” Suzy asked. She sidled up close to me and slid a hand partway around my bicep.
I pulled away from her. “Can you please watch the meat?” It was a potluck and there were tables lined up on the back lawn, four of them full of various dishes of food. “It will be ready in about half an hour, and I need to find Thea.”
“She probably wants to be alone. Why don’t you let her be, River?”
I turned toward Suzy and took her shoulders. “You’re a nice woman. You’re pretty and I appreciate all you’ve tried to do, but I’m in love with Thea. I always have been, and you know it. I’ve never lied about her.”
“It doesn’t matter if you love her. She obviously doesn’t care about you. River . . . think about it. She left you in the Texas dust.” She was imploring, but I realized it didn’t matter if she was right or wrong, I had to come clean with Thea.
“I just have to talk to her. I’ll see you later. Thanks for watching the smoker.”
I strode through the house and across the yard and property to the stable, intent on saddling up one of the other horses and going to look for Thea, but when I got there, Star was in her stall. She’d been wiped down and fed. I looked around and none of the other horses were missing. Thea wasn’t out riding, after all.
My heart seized painfully inside my chest. Where was she? Maybe she went back to New York. I shook my head. I’d just seen Marina outside talking to one of the ranch hands by the pool. I ran back to the house and up the stairs to her room. The door was unlocked and I burst through it. Her suitcase was still on the floor where I’d left it. It didn’t even look like she’d opened it or moved it at all.
I threaded both of my hands together on top of my head and turned around. Where in the hell was she?
It had been a rough couple of days and I’d been a total prick to her after we made love in the stable. I don’t know what the hell possessed me. I sucked in my breath and racked my brain for where she could be. Maybe she was down by the creek, or maybe she was on the roof of the house. We used to climb up there and look at the stars. I decided the roof wasn’t likely due to the party, so I headed back downstairs and out the front door toward the creek.
I started through the yard, past the tire swing hanging from the big oak. There were many cars sitting in the driveway and lined up for a mile or so on both sides of the lane. I’d put Thea’s rental car in the garage, and moved my truck out in front of the double doors by the stable so I could get out around the guest’s cars if needed.
I glanced at it as I passed by, heading toward the edge of the property and the creek. My heart seemed to be racing, ready to fly out of my chest. I was terrified that something had happened to her.
“Where are you going in such a hurry?” Thea’s voice sounded behind me.
I stopped and whirled around, the gravel grinding beneath my boots. I didn’t see her and I paused; my eyes scanning the scene in front of me.
“You’re running around like a chicken with your head chopped off. What’s your deal?” she said and then her head popped up from the bed of my old Chevy truck.
My breath whooshed out of my chest and my hand fell on my heart. “What the fuck? You scared the shit out of me. Have you been here the whole time?”
“No,” she said calmly and lay back down in the truck. “I just don’t want to face all of those people saying how sorry they are, and all of their soulful looks.”
I walked closer and I could see she was lying on top of a sleeping bag. We’d taken that truck out in the middle of the property and slept under the stars many times. I still kept the sleeping bag stuffed behind the seat and she must have remembered where I kept it.
“I think you and I should talk.”
“I don’t,” she answered. “Just go back in there with Suzy homemaker and get on with yourself.”
I shook my head and rubbed the back of my neck, looking at the top of my boots, considering what I should do. Goddamn if she wasn’t infuriating. Even as much as I loved her, she could get under my skin faster than any woman I knew.
It took me ten seconds to figure it out. I jumped in the cab of my truck and fired up the engine. Thea sat up in the back as I rushed to put it in gear before she could scramble out. “River! What are you doing?”
I tore out of the yard and down the lane, barely eeking in between the two rows of cars. Adrenaline was flowing through me. She and I were going to have it out once and for all. Three years late was better than never. I should have told her exactly how I felt, then.
At the end of the line of cars, there was an open gate in the middle. This part of the pasture was empty because the fence was being repaired here as well as on the other end of the property where Leonard had died. I turned abruptly, and sped through it and out into the middle of the field.
Thea was bouncing around in the back and it probably was painful, but I was on a mission, and I was mad as hell.
“River! You asshole! Kidnapping is a felony! Stop!”
“Not a chance!”
I kept going about five miles out so she wouldn’t be able to run away from me.
I slammed on the breaks and got out of the truck with a big slam of the creaky old door.
“What is your problem?” Thea screamed. “Are you trying to kill me? I’ll sell you the goddamned house so you and that. . . .” her fists were clenched at her sides and she was up on her knees, fuming. “Uhhhhhhhhhh! That bitch can play house in my house! Here, do you want some pie?” She threw one of my old work boots at me and I dodged it, incredulous at her reaction. She was jealous as hell. I loved it. “Oh, River, what do you need, honey? Ooohhhhh!” she sing-songed and hurled the other boot at me. “Makes me want to puke!” Her face was flushed and filled with fury.
I almost laughed. It was freaking hilarious. Why was Thea jealous when she was the only woman I ever wanted. Ever. She jumped out of the truck and started walking in the direction we’d just come. She’d changed out of her black dress into jeans, a red T-shirt and her boots.
“Good luck selling the house! I’m not buying the fucking thing!”
“So what?” she flipped me off in the air and kept walking. “Someone will!”
“Wanna bet? If there is loyalty to be had, where do you think it lays? The runway queen who ditched me, or the guy who makes this place work? Everyone in town is related to, or knows someone who works on The Acres. Do you think they’re gonna buy it if I don’t want it sold?” I asked arrogantly. “Maybe you’re high on the New York smog.”
She stopped and stomped back, her face mottled with anger. “Fuck you!” She hauled off and tried to slug me across the mouth but I caught her wrist in my fist. “Fuck you!” she said again, her eyes filling with frustrated tears.
My heart broke. The last thing I wanted was to hurt her and cause more distance between us, but I was still so goddamned mad she left in the first place.
“Okay, okay. Hey. Hey. ” I pulled her into my arms despite her protests and had to quickly turn her around when she tried to kick me in the shin, but still I held her tight. “Ouch!” I grunted, getting a grip on both of her arms and holding her off the ground. I was lucky she hadn’t kneed me in the balls. “Hey! Thea! Calm down.”
She still struggled, trying to free herself, and starting to sob uncontrollably. “Let go! Let me go!”
“No. I’ll never let you go!” I sank first to my knees and then sat back on my haunches still holding Thea against me. I buried my face into the curve of her neck and the curtain of her sweet smelling hair. “Shhhh, baby. Shhh,” I murmured softly. I was almost rocking her as she cried in my arms. She wasn’t struggling anymore, but she was still crying hard. “I’ll never let you go, do you hear me? You could fly to the fucking moon and you’d still be mine. We both know it.”
I stood up, still holding her and set her feet on the ground, and turned her so I could hold her face-to-face. Her hands clutched at my shirt as she cried her heart out.
“It’s been a hard couple of days. It’ll be okay.”
“I don’t know what to do, River,” she cried. “What do I do?”
I stroked her hair, my own heart breaking into a million pieces. “You can do whatever you want. I want you to stay, but I won’t hold you here.”
“You said you won’t let me sell the house.” She sniffed loudly. Her face was still buried in my neck.
“Because I want you to have a place to come back to.”
“You knew. You knew this whole weekend, that you were getting the bulk of the ranch.”
“It isn’t the ranch I want. It’s always been you.” I bent and brushed my mouth against hers, then kissed each eyelid, the tip of her nose and then her temple. “I love you, Thea.”
“It’s just that first love bullshit,” she said tearfully, and I laughed out loud.
“It sure as shit is. It’s lethal.” I brushed her hair back and cupped both sides of her face, then bent to kiss her again, gently coaxing a response from her. “What do you want? All you have to do is say what you want.”
“I want you, River. I don’t want to go back.”
My heart exploded with joy at the words I never thought I’d hear. “That’s music to my ears.” I released her to pull down the tailgate and spread out the sleeping bag. The truck bed was uneven and hard; the sleeping bag wasn’t going to offer enough padding to offset it. It wasn’t going to be very comfortable, but I didn’t care. She didn’t want to go back to the party and I was glad to have the time alone with her.