“I’d shake your hand, but I’m fighting the stomach flu. It’s nice to meet you, though. I’m Gwen.”
“Aw, that stinks. I hope you feel better.”
“Thanks.”
“Fred! We need you up here!” someone yells from upstairs.
“I've got to go. I hope you like it.”
“Thank you!” I shout after him as he climbs the steps.
“Let’s go. I’m nervous.” Reilly takes my hand and opens the back doors. What greets me brings actual tears to my eyes.
“This… This can’t be.” The deck has been replaced, and there is a hot tub to the left. The yard, though… The entire backyard is a maze of flowers and trees. It looks like a beautiful forest. The mermaid fountain is still there, and water actively runs out of the mouths of the sirens. “Oh my god, Reilly.” I prance down the steps and follow the walkway.
“It isn’t finished yet. There are a few things that we still need to work on, but for the most part, this is what it will look like. Do ye like it?”
I reach out and skim my finger over a sunflower, smiling at the bright beauty as it blooms. There are flowers all around that I have never seen before. There are more weeping willows back here, as well as cherry blossom trees. “Are you kidding? I could live out here. It’s phenomenal, Reilly.”
“I was really hoping ye would say that. Follow me.”
I push a few branches out of the way as we go deeper into the maze. He takes a left into a little nook, and when I walk through the bushes, I stop. My hand covers my mouth in shock. “What?” I shake my head. “You did this for me?” There is a small cabinet that reads “Gwen’s Library,” as well as a small pool for lounging.
“I know how much you love to read. You try to hide it, but I see ye reading on ye phone. I put a few books in here, but it isn’t full. I thought ye would want to do that. I imagined you sitting out here in the summer with a cold glass of lemonade, reading one of those fantasy novels ye love, and if ye got too hot, ye could take a dip. I’ll be here but only because ye will be in a skimpy swimsuit. So, I’ll just be checking ye out.”
I wrap my arms around him. “Is that so?”
His hands softly glide over my hips as we sway to the breeze and the leaves rustle together. “Hell yeah, love. I can’t wait to see this body glowing under the sun.”
I swallow a big lump in my throat. He did all of this for me. But I know that when my brother wakes up, he’ll crawl back into his hole. I plaster on a fake smile and ask the question I know we’ve been avoiding. “So, when are we getting married?”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Reilly
Her question makes me shiver. I’ve been putting it off for as long as possible, but St. Patrick’s Day approached faster than I thought it would with everything else going on. “We don’t have to do it, ye know. I’m okay with giving up the pub.”
“You can’t give it up! You love that pub and so does everyone else in this town. Lucky loved it. You can’t let it go because of something that can be fixed. I already agreed.”
“I wanted to wait until your brother woke up before I married ye, Gwenie. I wanted him to be there. We can do this the right way.”
I see the moment the bars and walls rise up, blocking her emotions from me. “We had a deal.”
That confuses the shite out of me, because for the last couple weeks, I’ve thought things were going in a different direction. “How could you even think that? The last couple weeks, we have barely been apart. I thought that was us agreeing that we wanted to be together.”
“You don’t want to be with me, Reilly. You want me now, but when Anthony wakes up, you’ll change your mind. I’m okay with that. I want us to get married. You can save your pub, and then we can get an annulment. Maybe we can do it right next time.”
“Next time? I don’t want a next time, Gwen. I want right now. I want this time to be the time.”
“We’ve fucked this up too many times, Reilly. There isn’t a way to save it!” she shouts, and her eyes widen as if she hadn’t meant to say it, but she doesn’t take it back, either.
I nod, pissed and hurt beyond belief.
“I don’t want Anthony to be part of this. He never has to know,” she says.
Damn, just twist the damn knife a little deeper in my chest, why don’t ye?
“Alright. Fine. If that’s what you want. Let’s go.” I turn my back to her, not knowing what to do. Love shouldn’t be so damn hard. Love shouldn’t be fighting all the damn time, should it?
“Reilly…”
“No, Gwen. I’m done talking about it.” We walk through the house. “Fred!”
“Yeah, boss?”
“Stop all your work. I’ll call you when I need you again.”
I hear Gwen gasp with shock, but I don’t care. I only did all this for her, and if she doesn’t want it, then I don’t want the damn house. I’ll put it back on the market just the way it was. I don’t care if I make profit or not. I bang the door open and it slams against the outside stone, probably chipping and ruining it in the process. It doesn’t matter. No one is living here anyway.
“You can’t stop the work! You love this place. You’ve wanted this place forever!" she calls after me.
I spin on my heel, not bothering to hide the pain in my expression. “I only wanted this place because of you! I love you! I got this place for you, Gwen. I wanted to make your dreams come true. If you don’t want it, and if you aren’t going to be part of it, then I want nothing to do with it.” I open her car door, waiting for her to get in.
“Where are we going?” she asks, her mascara running a bit as she cries.
“The courthouse. We’re getting married.” I slam her door and stare at the iron gates. The construction crew climb into their cars, preparing to leave. I know I’ll continue on with the project, but right now, I’m too hurt. I’ll make sure to let Fred know. I’m not going to put anyone out of a job.
“I don’t want it to happen like this.”
I peel out of the driveway and head toward City Hall. “You’re going to have to tell me what you want, Gwen. Because first you don't want my love and then you do want it, and it's starting to confuse the shite out of me. You want a real wedding, but you don’t want our fake marriage to mean anything? I mean, I don’t know what you want from me.”
“Why can’t we go as friends? We’ve been friends for a long time. Let’s just do that.”
I scoff, not even considering her words. “Friends? That’s what you want to call all those years of ignoring each other, stealing glances, and sharing innocent touches? Are you kidding me? We have never been friends, Gwen. Let’s not kid ourselves. We could never just be friends because we love each other.”
“Anthony doesn’t need the stress of this when he wakes up.”
“What if he doesn’t?” I regret the words as soon as they come out of my mouth.
If it were possible, smoke would be coming from her nose and ears right about now. I crossed a line. “I can’t believe you’d even say that,” she says, her voice weak and broken as she stares at me.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.” I reach for her hand, but she snatches it away from me.
“Let’s just get this over with.” She crosses her arms and sinks back into the seat, looking out the window.
My heart felt numb. I want this woman more than my next breath, but boy, how the tables have turned. How is it that she's concerned now and I'm the one not giving a damn? The tires squeal and burn a little rubber as I turn into the parking spot. She hops out of the car so damn quick, I haven’t even had the chance to turn off the car's engine.
I shove the damn gear shifter in park and run out to get her. People are staring at us with confusion as she stomps ahead of me. “Gwen!” I shout, running after her. My shoes scuff against the ground as I take her hand in mine. “I’m not doing this without touching ye. Ye can be mad at me all ye want, but I want ye to know I’m going into this loving ye. I know ye
are, too, or ye wouldn’t be doing it.”
She doesn’t say anything as she yanks the door open, stomping inside and causing her footsteps to echo down the marble hallway. She hits the button for the elevator with frustration. She huffs and crosses her arms, tapping her foot against the floor.
“Gwen, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that, but we need to talk about the possibility of Anthony not waking up. I don’t want that, but it is something we might have to face.”
“Here is something I have to face.” Her hair flies in a circle as she faces me. Her cheeks are red, and her eyes blaze with anger. “The next few months of my life are going to be spent married to a man who doesn’t have hope in my brother's survival. I have to spend the next few months married to a man who doesn’t have the balls to face said brother. I can’t wait for these next few months to be over with.” The doors of the elevator open, and an older lady gives me a dirty look when she sees Gwen crying.
I lift my hands in surrender. “I’m the one that wants to tell everyone,” I defend myself, shouldering my way into the elevator when the doors start to close. Once it jolts and ascends, I press the emergency stop button. “Gwen, we need to talk before we sign those papers. I don’t know why ye are fighting me so hard. I told ye I want to tell Anthony. I want to tell everyone, but ye are the one that doesn’t want to tell him, if, or when, he wakes up.”
“He is going to wake up!” she shouts. “He doesn’t need to be stressed out when he does.”
“Then I don’t understand why ye would blame me right now. I’m ready. I’m ready for us, now. Are you?”
She presses the elevator button and it starts moving again. “I’m ready to get this over with.”
Before I know it, I’m standing in front of the desk clerk who looks bored beyond belief. “Do you take this man to be your husband?” she asks as she blows a bubble and it pops.
“Sure," Gwen says with zero enthusiasm.
The clerk's eyes look in my direction. “Do you take this woman to be your wife?” she taps away on her keyboard, almost seeming like she isn’t even paying attention to us.
“I do.”
I have dreamed of this moment for years, regardless of whether or not Gwen’s mad at me. She would go through with our original deal just because she’s so stubborn.
The woman signs a piece of paper, stamps it, and places it on the counter. “Congratulations," she continues. "With the power vested in me by the state of Virginia, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
“Yeah, right.” Gwen snatches the paper from the counter and slaps it against my chest. “Congratulations. You get to keep the pub. Call me when we can fix things.” She stomps away, vanishing down the hall.
I sigh, wondering when the hell this all became so difficult. We are in love and this is just a stupid fight. When Anthony wakes up, I’m going to tell him everything, and then everything will be fine.
If only he would wake up.
“Thanks,” I tell the lady who just married us.
“I hope you have a wonderful life together,” she says as she stares at her computer, sounding like death could be more exciting than her day job.
I tuck the paper inside my jacket pocket. “I hope so, too.” Because to be completely honest, I don’t even know what we’re fighting about anymore. It doesn’t make any sense. It has to blow over soon or later.
I leave City Hall, thinking Gwen would be standing next to my car for a ride, but the space next to her door is empty. The sun is shining brightly, and people are walking down the street. It blows my mind that no matter how much chaos goes on in someone’s life, everything else moves on.
I dig my hand into my pocket and pull out Gwen's ring. Even with everything going on, I’d made sure to get something special for her. It hurts so bad that I won’t get to see her wear it. I take the Claddagh on my right hand and move it to my left, the point of the heart pointing toward my wrist and signifying my marriage. She might not be ready to accept the truth, but I am. I should have woken up a long time ago. I should have voiced how I felt years ago, but I didn’t, and now I have to live with it. I always told myself that we couldn’t be together because of this or that. There was always an excuse that I made up. It was either her brother, or the timing wasn’t right, or she was too young, or she deserved better. See? There was always something.
But not anymore.
She has a lot going on right now, and maybe it’s her turn to battle through her emotions. I’m willing to give her time, especially because I’ve already had mine. People deal with life differently, and I plan to give her what she needs. If she decides that I’m not what she really wants, then I’ll let her go.
If that means not being together, then so be it, but as of right now, she is Mrs. O’Hara. With all the shite going on, that feels pretty fucking good, even if the situation isn’t too great right now. I open the car door and decide to head to the cemetery. I need to talk to Grandpa.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Gwendolyn
“You did what?!” Mills shouts as I pace around the kitchen, biting my thumbnail.
“I got married.”
“You’re kidding. Is this a joke?” She laughs as if this was a prank.
I flatten my lips together and shake my head. “No. I married Reilly. It's real.”
“What the hell were you thinking! You better start from the beginning. I’ve been left in the dark for far too long.”
“There’s more," I whisper.
She stands up from her leaning position and cocks her head. “Of course there’s more.”
I debate if I should tell her. Maybe I shouldn’t. I don’t even know for sure yet. “I think I might be pregnant.” I hold my hand to my stomach, both hoping it’s true and hoping that it isn’t. I don’t know what I want. I don’t even know how I ended up in this position. I mean I know how… but how!
She blinks like she didn’t hear me. “What?”
“I might be pregnant.”
“Like, with a baby?”
I deadpan her. “What else would I be pregnant with?”
“Sorry, I’m just so surprised. Are you sure?”
I shake my head. “No, but for the last few weeks, I’ve been feeling really weird, and I throw up all the time.”
She takes my hand in hers, staring me right in the eye. “You know it could be stress, right? Everything has been really tense lately, and you know what the doctor said about you ever becoming pregnant.”
“Like I could forget!” I hiss, hating that I won’t ever be able to have a baby. I missed my period, but irregularity is common with endometriosis. I didn’t think twice about it.
“I’m sorry. I know you know, but if you are pregnant, we have to take you to the doctor right away.”
“I need to tell Reilly. He deserves to know.”
“He doesn’t need to know yet. We don’t know if it's true, but once we know, you can tell him the facts.”
I nod. That’s sound logic. “Okay. You’re right. But I can’t go into a store around here and buy a pregnancy test! Everyone will know. And I don’t want people to know right now.”
“Lucky you. I have a test.”
“You’ve had a pregnancy scare?”
She smiles. “What girl hasn’t?”
I raise my hand. “This would be my first.”
She walks into her room, rummaging through her cabinets. “Are you excited about it?”
I don’t know. I want to be. I never thought I would have this chance. “Honestly... I think so. I mean, for years, I have been under the impression that I had to adopt, which is great, and I still want to. But part of me thinks that there's no way I can be. We have used protection every time.”
She pops her head out of the door, her hands still in the cabinet. “Every time? Really?”
“Yeah, the entire point was to avoid this situation. Not that it helped. I feel like I missed out.”
She fans her face. �
��Girl, you did. It feels so much better without one.”
“Don’t rub it in. I don’t even know if I’ll ever have sex with Reilly again.” I plop down on her bed.”
“Why wouldn’t you?”
“Things are… Complicated right now.”
She lets out an annoyed sigh. “It’s only complicated because you guys make it complicated. It’s so annoying. Really. I never met two people who wanted to be together so much but ignored it for no good reason. And you? You’re being stubborn. You’re giving him a taste of his own medicine, and I have to say, it isn’t your best quality.” She pulls out a bin and starts to sort through everything. “Where is that damn thing?” she asks herself.
My face heats up because of her scrutiny. “I am not. That’s not true.”
“It isn’t? Then why aren’t you having wild, crazy, newlywed sex?”
“Because I’m mad at him,” I grumble, slouching my shoulders as I think about it more. “You’re right.”
She lifts her head from the bin and smiles at me. “I know I am. I know you better than you know yourself.”
“I said I didn’t want Anthony to know. And that we could get married and just divorce before Anthony wakes up. Since Anthony was the issue from the beginning, it takes care of everything. But then Reilly said that Anthony might not wake up. It got my blood boiling, you know? I can’t believe he would say that.”
“Man, you are so unreasonable. He finally wants to take a leap and you shove it in his face.”
“I didn’t shove it in his face! I realized he was right. There is a difference.”
“Ah−ha! Got it.” She pops her head back out from behind the door and waves the pregnancy test in the air. “He was right. You realized that. You’re getting scared. Life is happening too quickly. Now, enough of this, because I’m right, and you’re wrong. You love him. I’ve been hearing about this every day since we were twelve. Grow up and face it already.”
I blink at her, shocked by how callously she says those things.
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