by K. I. Lynn
She’s drunk, and adorable, and absolutely delusional. I’ve been good, kept as much of a respectful distance as my hunger for her has allowed. Have tried my best to not push too hard after that day at the restaurant.
That doesn’t mean I’m going to let her return to that party. She’s done for the night.
I pry her arms off me and turn to back away from her.
Kira’s panting, eyes lit up with the challenge, her hair a sexy mess. Instead of anger, I see what seems to be amusement glowing in her eyes.
Fuck, I want to eat her. Don’t know if I can control myself much longer.
She points her little finger menacingly at me. “Brayden . . .”
I throw my hands up and back away some more. “Go ahead. Shred me alive. But you know I’m not letting you go back over there.” Her annoyed huff makes me smile.
Her lips twitch in response. She’s fighting to hold back her own smile, and it only makes me smile wider. “You do know I’m very willing to shred you alive, right?” She starts coming toward me, almost like a predator stalking prey.
Fuck, yeah. That has to be one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen.
It takes all of my willpower to continue backing away. To remind myself that she’s drunk and I have no right to take advantage of that. “You do know I’ll probably end up liking it, don’t you?” I mumble, even more turned on by the idea of her clawing at me. Biting into me.
I’ll even let her draw blood. Whatever she wants.
A drunken giggle escapes her as her lips stretch involuntarily into a smile.
Those lips. God help me, I want them. Want to love on them. Fuck them. Come on them.
The air between us is suddenly hot and playful, and I don’t understand where the change came from. It’s so sudden that I’m left reeling, clueless how to deal with it.
Is she ready to give in to what she feels for me?
Does she want me to do every single thing I’m imagining myself doing to her?
We’ve made our way onto the driveway wrapped around the side of the house. Kira stops and tilts her head, staring behind me. “It’s still there. Forgot about that.”
I turn to see what she’s looking at—the large, dark outline of the tree house Ryan and I built almost ten years ago. The new owners of the house never took it down, and I think they even upgraded it for their kids at one point.
Kira rushes up to me and grabs my hand. “Come on.”
I let her lead me at first, too caught up in the feel of her small hand in mine. “Kira, wait. The neighbors.”
She doesn’t slow down one bit, her heels clicking on the pavement. “Driveway is empty. They aren’t here.”
“That doesn’t mean anything.”
Spinning around, she places her finger on my lips. “Shhh.”
I can’t help it. Groaning, I suck her finger into my mouth and Kira lets me, her lips parting, breaths speeding up. I watch her pupils expand, my dick pounding inside my jeans.
She swallows heavily and slides her finger out of my mouth. “Come.”
Shit. The way she says that, I almost do.
Christ, if she’s planning to take me up into that tree house to seduce me, drunk or not, I don’t think I’ll be able to resist her.
Kira stops next to where the driveway ends and bends down to slide off her heels. Just that simple act hits me like a punch to the dick. “Kira, this isn’t a good idea.”
She throws me a playful look over her shoulder. “Oh, shut up. You know you want to.”
Damn me, does she even realize how sultry and delicious she looks right now? Barefoot, in that tight-as-fuck dress, that teasing expression making my dick twitch hungrily for her. “I want to do a lot of things I can’t do right now.” Most of them don’t even involve getting her up into that tree house.
Ignoring my murmured comment, she walks onto the grass, hips swaying with every step.
I’m helpless not to follow, my eyes glued to that perfect bubble butt of hers. She stops at the ladder leading up to the tree house. This ladder is brand new, definitely not the same one that snapped with her on it years ago.
It’s been ten years since that day, yet my chest fucking tightens, like I’m experiencing it all over again. That feeling of almost losing her chokes me. A feeling I’ve felt too many times in my life.
Kira places her heels next to the tree and grabs onto the ladder.
I step closer. She’s drunk—not falling all over herself drunk, but I’m still worried.
Not that I should be. She climbs that ladder as expertly as she always did. Halfway up, she stops to check if I’m following her.
I’m not.
Her position allows me to see up her skirt clearly, and she’s either wearing the smallest thong on earth—
Or she isn’t wearing anything under that dress.
My body tightens with more lust.
My blood heats with raw anger.
“You coming up?” she asks me, as if nothing’s fucking wrong.
“Kira . . . tell me you’re wearing something under that.” Fists clenched, I struggle for some semblance of calm.
The insidious question nagging at the back of my mind bursts forward—did Kira dress up like that for Austin?
This motherfucking pain, man. It’s the reason I’m willing to take whatever she throws at me. I didn’t realize it at the time, but this is what I did to her, what I made her feel for too damn long.
I’ll take all of it. Including this hit. I deserve it.
Exhaling, I grab on to the ladder.
She rushes up into the tree house, not answering my question.
Sure, go ahead, girl. Leave that knife shoved inside my chest. Fifty-fifty right?
I follow her up into the tree house, not believing that I let her convince me to do this. We’re going to be arrested if we’re caught.
When I get inside, Kira’s sitting down against the far wall. All I can see is her outline, her long hair falling over her shoulders.
We’re not up here to have sex.
I’m having a hard time convincing myself of that. Having an even harder time believing that she isn’t entertaining the idea as much as I am. That she isn’t thinking of us tearing into each other up here, in the dark, in the same place we spent so many hours playing as children.
Fuck, that thought turns me on. I’m probably a sick bastard for that, but I can’t help it.
I move closer to her. Can’t have her. She’s had too much to drink. The litany runs through my mind. A warning.
If I do anything with her now, she’ll have an excuse to pretend it was all a mistake tomorrow.
No. The next time I touch Kira, I want her fully aware that she’s letting me. That she fucking wants it as much as I do.
It’s still hell. Every inch that I move closer, all I imagine is fisting all that hair and bringing her to my mouth.
I sit down slightly across from her. Her head turns in my direction. “Turn on your phone’s light,” she whispers in a fucking siren’s voice.
“It’s not a good idea for us to be up here.” I wish she understood how much I mean that.
“It’s not a good idea for me to be up here with you, you mean.”
That comment shouldn’t sting as much as it does. “I rather you be up here with me than anyone else,” I growl.
“Then turn on the light.”
Shit. Mother of fuck. Her voice.
Like the pathetic slave I am, I bring my phone out and do as she says. As soon as the light is on and I can stare into her eyes, I ask her that question. The evil one that won’t leave me the hell alone. “Did you dress up like this for Austin?” Damn it, I need to know, even if that answer ends up ruining me.
She just stares at me with her big hazel eyes. Eyes that are usually so expressive. Now I can’t read them. She’s getting good at hiding what’s on her mind. Especially from me.
I grind my teeth at that realization.
“It’s not cool what you did back there,
Brayden. Taking my keys.”
My shoulder jerks in a shrug. “I’ll apologize for a million things, but not that. I wanted you out of there.”
“What if I storm into your life and get in the way of you having fun?”
I laugh at that. She still doesn’t get it. At this point, I’m starting to wonder just how far I’ll have to go to convince her. “I’m yours. You have permission to do whatever the hell you want to me.”
She seems to mull that over. “You wanted me out of there . . . why? Because Austin was there?”
The teeth grinding resumes. “Yes.”
“You shouldn’t care so much.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” It takes all my self-control to keep from yelling out. “He loves you. You . . . you feel something for him. I don’t know what, but it’s there. I told you I’d forgive you for choosing him, but don’t expect me to just sit back and do nothing to try to stop it. Until you make that choice, I’m going to fight like hell for you.” This topic grates. A feeling I can’t stand, scratching its way through me.
On top of it all, Kira continues to sit there, calm as can be. “I love how you still think you have any say in that decision.”
I run both my hands through my hair. “He went back and slept with Jennifer.”
“I’ll remind you again—so did you.”
“When I was seventeen, and not after sleeping with you. You . . . fuck!” Saying it is almost as hard as remembering it. But not saying it isn’t going to erase the fact that it happened, either. “You gave yourself to him. He was your first, and he still ran back to her.”
Her eyes drop, but not before I see what flashes in them.
“Tell me,” I say, voice hoarse. “Tell me to fucking destroy him for what he did to you, and I’ll go back and do so right now.” It’s not the first time I’ve begged her for this. Probably won’t be the last.
Expression calm once more, she leans back on the wall, eyes focused ahead. “You really do care that he hurt me.” She sounds surprised.
“Of course I fucking do.”
She laughs under her breath. “It’s not like he and I were together, so I have no real reason to be upset, right?”
I wish that was true. So damn bad. “You might have not been together, but there was something between you guys. He had no right to do that to you.”
“Was there something going on between me and Austin?”
“You were sleeping together.” I can’t keep the bitterness out of my tone; don’t even bother to try.
“I only slept with Austin that one time.”
What . . . my mouth falls open, and I can’t formulate a response. I can barely formulate thoughts.
Once? He only had her once?
Once is more than enough, but hearing that he hasn’t slept with Kira since that one time . . . fuck. I feel like I’ve been hit. Elation bubbles up in me, until I see the look on her face.
It doesn’t matter how many times they were together, if she keeps insisting she isn’t hurt. Obviously she is, and even though I don’t know why, the desire to hurt him in return won’t leave me alone. “It’s fucked up what he did to you, Kira. Let me make him pay.”
“Why is it okay for you to hurt me, but it’s wrong that he did so?”
God damn, this girl has a way of cutting me to the quick with her words. “None of the things I did to you were okay. I’ve told you hundreds of times. I fucked up. I fucked up so bad, Kira.”
“So you want me to forgive you, but not him?”
I get why she’s asking me these things. I even appreciate the fact that, instead of pushing me away completely, she’s actually trying to understand me.
Still, opening up isn’t my strong suit. Not even with her. Being put on the spot so suddenly makes me want to shut down, avoid further discussion.
But I know I won’t. When it comes to what I want with Kira, I finally have my shit straight. I’m going to do what’s right. “You can forgive him if you want. Yet we both know that the one thing I don’t want is for you to be with him.”
She tilts her head, hair sliding over her shoulder. My phone goes dark. I hurry to turn it back on, needing to see more of her.
Just looking at her is better than any sex I’ve ever had with anyone else.
“It has to be your pride,” Kira says thoughtfully. “That’s why you don’t want me with him.”
Fuck, yeah. My pride is involved. I won’t deny it. I’m a guy, and some other fucker is actively trying to take what’s mine. “It’s not just that. I love you.”
“You say that so easily now. But you never stopped to think how much you were hurting me all those years. I’m supposed to forgive you for that? What if his reasons are similar to yours?”
The comparisons to Austin are fucking killing me. No matter how deserved they are, she has to stop that shit before I lose my mind. “You’re right, baby. I didn’t stop to think about anything.”
Kira tenses up at my admission, and I see the anger rise in her. The resentment.
I hurry to add, “I was too caught up in my own pain, and I had to escape. That’s what losing you did to me. It fucked me up so bad, and I was already fucked up to begin with.” Admitting I’d been a pussy back then isn’t easy, but it’s true. “I was frantic to numb myself, and I couldn’t. In the end, that was the hardest lesson.”
“What was?”
“That no one on this planet is you, and you’re all I fucking want. I don’t care how, what I have to do to earn you.” Leaning toward her, I lock eyes with her. “And trust me, Kitty. I’ve learned my lesson well.”
Even in the dim light of my phone, I see her cheeks pinken. Her expression is lucid, focused intensely on me, trying to gauge my honesty, and I start to wonder if she’s even drunk anymore.
Kira gets on all fours and starts crawling toward me.
I tense.
Breath leaves me.
Desire collides with that ever-present, insatiable hunger. The force of it burns through my veins and slams into my cock.
My mouth fucking waters with every centimeter that she gets closer.
She’s drunk. Definitely still tipsy at the least. There’s no way one of my most violent fantasies is coming true this easily.
I slam my head back against the wall. “Kira, why—don’t.”
Her hand lands on the floor next to my hip. Her other hand lands on the other side.
My hips jerk up toward her, seeking. “Kitty.” Don’t do this to me. Not right now. I can’t fucking fight it . . .
“You’re only saying all these things because you want to fuck me.”
I groan at the tone of her voice—husky, low, hungry for me.
“And for some reason, Brayden—” She presses her lips to my ear. “—Right now, I really want to let you fuck me.”
Oh God. “No, baby. Please.”
She drags her lips along my jaw, down to my chin.
Push her away. Fucking hell, do it.
“All . . . this . . . time . . .” Kira ducks her head, kissing the spot under my chin. A sweet, almost affectionate kiss; it sends shocks through me, making my hair stand on end. “Trying to get me to fuck you—” Parting her lips, she drags her bottom one up my chin, toward my mouth. “And now you’re turning me down?”
I snap my head back before my lips connect with hers. “If you were fucking sober, I’d have you flat on that floor right now, thighs spread for me.”
Giggling, she rubs her cheek against mine, purring in the back of her throat.
My cock jerks at that sexy sound.
“Do it,” Kira whispers. “Pin me under you. Spread me wide.”
Holy . . . fuck . . .
Such dirty words from my girl . . . I freeze, then reach out and grab onto her waist to pull her back.
Shit. Bad move.
Her waist is tiny, fits right into my hands. I could use it to control her rhythm, how fast or slow she slides up and down my cock . . .
No.
Sh
e bites into my neck, right where she marked me before, and her hand lands on my dick.
“Kira, baby. Oh fuck, yes.”
Biting down harder, she jerks me through my jeans.
“Fuck, I’m gonna come, Kitty. Stop.”
She moans around my flesh, sucking hard, wanting to mark me.
My dick pulsates for her.
Her hand squeezes down around me.
Groaning, I lean forward and kiss her neck. Just one kiss. One taste and I’ll stop.
My tongue flicks out.
One taste isn’t enough. Fuck, it’ll never be enough.
I thrust up into her hand, sucking her into my mouth.
She whimpers and bites me even harder.
Fuck yeah, I want it. I want the promise of violent sex between us. Want her claw marks running down my back, her bite marks all over me.
“Fuck me, Brayden. Fuck me hard.”
Yes. God, yes. I slide my hands down her slim back, toward her ass.
Sanity shoots through my mind. A momentary burst of common sense.
Not like this. Not. Fucking. Like. This.
I slam back into the wall behind me, at the same time jerking Kira away from me.
On her knees before me, she blinks up at me, expression hazy with lust.
I scramble to my feet, adrenaline pumping through my veins. My cock is so hard he’s practically pointing at her. “No.” My voice breaks; I clear my throat before speaking again. “It’s not happening like this, Kira.”
“I don’t get it. You keep trying to fuck me.”
“I don’t just want to fuck you!” Bending down, I run my fingers down her cheek. Smooth. Delicious. If she were sober right now, I’d eat every inch of her. “I want you. Not just your pussy. And letting you fuck me while you’re drunk doesn’t help me with that.”
Her calmness evaporates. Jaw clenched, she moves away from me. “I’ll never be your girl, Brayden.”
It hurts every time she says that. Not that I pay too much attention to it. She wants to believe her words, I see that. Regardless, it’s not true. “If you truly believe that, come find me tomorrow. Sober. Come and ask me to fuck you while you’re fully aware of what you’re asking for.”
I watch her get to her feet. “And if I do?”
Impatience rides me, almost overruling my resolve. I don’t allow myself to contemplate my answer for too long. “If you do . . . then I’ll give you what you want.”