by Lisa Jackson
“She is very dedicated to her work,” Sawyer said without missing a beat. “A true professional.”
“Well, I’d love to see this sailboat,” Anya said. “Maybe the four of us could have a nightcap and you could give us the tour? Unless you’d like to come along, Mrs. Hathaway?”
“Don’t be silly. You young people have fun. I’m sure Nate and Danielle have a lot of catching up to do.” Ruth’s gaze slid from Nate to Dani and back again. All that was missing was the bat of her eyelashes.
“Good night, Nanna.” Nate kissed her on each cheek.
“Danielle, will you and Sawyer be joining Nate and Anya tomorrow night for ‘A Stroll Through Christmas Past’?” Ruth called out before getting into her car.
“Oh, we wouldn’t miss it,” Dani said.
“That’s wonderful. I’ve volunteered as one of the tour guides.”
“That’s perfect,” Dani said. That was the tour where Ruth always got worked up about how the “English Invaders” had “almost destroyed Wilmington.” How would Anya react to that? Dani couldn’t wait to find out. She forced herself to stop smiling.
“We’re entertaining now?” Sawyer whispered to her as Nate and Anya got in the back of the rental car.
“It’s the South,” Dani said. “Get used to it.”
They stopped at a market and bought a couple of bottles of wine. Nate got out his wallet to pay and then Sawyer stepped up to the plate and the two of them argued about who would pay until Sawyer bought another two bottles. Were they fighting to impress Dani, or Anya? Dani knew it was childish, but she so hoped they were fighting over her.
“We’re going to get absolutely blotto,” Anya said. Her eyes lit up and she clapped her hands. Danielle peered at her to see if she was joking. Miss Prim and Proper get blotto? So much for it being a shotgun wedding. Maybe Dani had judged her a little too hastily.
Nate was right, the cars were back and it was difficult to find parking. Dani finally had to settle for several blocks away. They walked toward the river. Sawyer and Nate were having what appeared to be a discussion ahead of them, and Anya and Dani strolled pleasantly behind. It was as if they were on a double date. Many of the little boutiques were lit up, staying open later to catch holiday shoppers, and lights glowed from within restaurants. Dani loved all the little decorations: wreaths on street lamps, Christmas trees in store windows, and even a red plume on the horse pulling the carriage. And for a few seconds, it felt normal. That Anya was with Nate, and Dani was with Sawyer. I like Sawyer, Dani thought to herself, trying it out. I’m with Sawyer.
“What are you getting Nate for Christmas?” Dani asked. She was curious. She had always bought Nate a T-shirt and a CD. Last Christmas she planned on greeting him in a sexy little Santa outfit, with a copy of the Kama Sutra. That probably would have been a disaster. Sawyer, on the other hand, would have loved the gift. Immediately she saw herself on the sailboat with Sawyer. In the Santa outfit. A red lace bra and thong, and a Santa hat. And the red heels, don’t forget those. She imagined Sawyer sitting on the sofa. She, standing in front of him, hands on hips. His grin would light up the block. But every time she wondered what Nate would have thought of the gift, she couldn’t picture it. She could only see him grabbing a blanket from the sofa and covering her up.
Making love with Nate had been nice, very nice, but even though she didn’t have the field experience to back it up, Dani was worried that their lovemaking was not as passionate as it should be. Nate was so . . . quiet. And quick. He had a beautiful body and she loved touching him, and kissing him, but more often than not, he seemed to think it was something best to get over with, like brushing your teeth. And, she hated admitting this, but Nate had poor circulation. So his hands and even lips were always cold. Sometimes it was like kissing an ice cube. Which might have been nice if he had liked exploring her body with it, but he was rather shy in that department, too. Everything they did was so—clean. And she’d been too young to tell him how she really wished it would go. That she wanted clothes torn, and hearts hammering, and sheets sweaty. That she wanted to scream out, and thrash about, and maybe even do it more than once in one evening. That she wanted him to hunger for her. That she wanted to see a certain look in his eye—
Oh. The look Sawyer could give her from across a room. She liked that. Even if she got back together with Nate this evening, there would be times, for sure, that she would close her eyes and imagine Sawyer giving her that look. Just to remember what it felt like, knowing someone desired you so much that one lingering look from him could raise your body temperature to a feverish degree.
That couldn’t have been why she turned down Nate’s marriage proposal, could it? Oh God. Was she secretly some kind of sex maniac? Nate was the only lover she’d ever had. There were opportunities in New York, of course, loads of them. But she had always felt as if she’d be cheating on Nate. Even when he wasn’t speaking to her. She felt ashamed and deathly curious to know what Anya and Nate’s sex life was like. She couldn’t imagine Nate any other way than he was with her. Maybe Anya liked it quiet and quick. Keep Calm and Carry On.
“Come on.” Anya grabbed Danielle’s hand. “I have to show you,” she said. She threw her arms up in the air and waved at Nate and Sawyer even though they were way ahead of them. “Oh lads!”
Sawyer glanced back, caught Dani’s eye, and smiled. And Nate’s eyes sought out Anya’s. Dani smiled back at Sawyer. I like you, she said silently. Okay? This was crazy. Was it just the Christmas wreaths and the gentle glow coming from the restaurants that was giving her a sense of buoyancy? How was it that she didn’t feel jealous of Nate and Anya?
“I’m taking Danielle on a little detour. We’ll see you lads back at the boat.”
“All right,” Nate said.
Sawyer caught Dani’s eye again. “Be nice,” he said.
“Yes, Santa,” Dani said. Although something about you makes me want to be very, very naughty.
Danielle and Anya stood in Nate’s studio. They were in the back room standing in front of an easel. A white sheet covered something propped on the easel. Anya whipped it off. It was a sixteen-by-twenty framed photograph. Anya on the beach. The wind was slightly blowing her hair back. Her head was tilted, her eyes sparkling, and her mouth open in a smile. She was holding a starfish across her engagement finger.
“Wow,” Danielle said. Was this girl in love with herself or what?
“This was me a few moments after Nate proposed and I said yes,” Anya said. “He said this was the happiest moment of his life.”
“Oh,” Danielle said. “Wow.” There was a giant lump in her throat. Instantly, she was back on the boardwalk, begging Nate to tie his shoe, pretend he wasn’t kneeling on the ground to ask her hand in marriage. What was she doing? She didn’t deserve a second chance.
“You must think I’ve gone mad,” Anya said.
“No. It’s lovely. Nate will love it. I’m sure of it.”
Anya grasped Dani’s hand. “I hope so. I can’t wait until our flat is filled with photos of the two of us. That’s how you know you’re a couple, isn’t it? When the mantle is filled with lovely photos?”
All these years with Nate and Dani suddenly couldn’t remember them in any photos together. Not romantic ones anyway. There were group photos, Nate and Dani at the galas throughout the years, things like that. Nothing Dani would want to frame and put on a fireplace.
“Sawyer is an excellent photographer,” Anya said. “Does he only do commercial work, or does he have an artistic bent, as well?”
“I don’t know,” Dani said. “He’s never mentioned it.”
“And you’ve never asked?”
Although Anya’s tone was genuinely curious, Dani suddenly felt like such a rotten person. She had been totally self-absorbed. She didn’t know much about Sawyer at all. Except that he was sarcastic, and frustrating, and sexy, and a hell of a kisser.
“We’d better head back,” Dani said.
“Do you want to see my w
edding gown?” Anya asked. She pointed at a closet door. “It’s just in there.”
“Maybe another night?” Dani asked. The lump in her throat had spread to her stomach.
“Of course. I’m sorry. I’m just so excited, and my girlfriends aren’t here to share it with.”
“Wouldn’t you rather get married in London?” Dani asked. “With all your mates?”
“All my mates?” Anya laughed. “We’re going to have a huge celebration in London. I’m going to wear my gown again and everything. Tradition is much more important to Ruth, so we wanted to at least give her that.”
“But why rush it? Why not wait a year or so?”
“Why would we do that?”
“Look, it’s none of my business. But you haven’t known Nate very long.”
“When it’s right, you don’t need to wait. When it’s right, you can’t wait to begin your life with the person you love.”
They walked back in silence. Dani couldn’t get the wedding dress off her mind now. She was dying to know what it looked like. Was it anything like the dress she would have worn? Dani would have gone with something Southern. Satin, and lace, and a long train.
Once on the boat, Nate handed each of them a glass of wine. The girls gravitated to the deck while Nate and Sawyer retreated to the cabin. Danielle wondered what on earth they would find to talk about. Then again, she was wondering the same about her. Getting to know Anya might mean getting to like Anya.
“I don’t think Ruth likes me,” Anya said, barely a sip into the wine.
“Ruth can be intimidating,” Dani said. “I didn’t think she liked me at first, either.”
“Really?” Anya said.
“Really,” Dani said.
“How did you finally get her to like you?”
“You got engaged to Nate,” Dani blurted out. Anya’s eyes were as wide as saucers. Dani couldn’t believe she just said that. Then, Anya burst into laughter. Finally, Dani did, too.
“I can’t believe it,” Anya said after they calmed down. “Even after you . . . Sorry.”
“Even after I publicly broke Nate’s heart?” Dani could tell from the look on Anya’s face that that was exactly what she almost said.
“It was in poor taste to mention it. Forgive me. I just get this feeling—she’s trying to stop the wedding.” Anya paused, then looked at Dani. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Are you trying to stop the wedding?”
“I didn’t know you were getting married so soon. I must admit. I’m taken aback.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“What do you want me to say? I’ve loved Nate my entire life.”
“I can’t believe this. I hoped there was something between you and the photographer.” Was it that obvious? Why hadn’t Dani ever admitted it before? “You must know how he looks at you?”
“Come on.” Dani was dying to hear how he looked at her. She thought there was a spark whenever he did, but could others actually see it?
“I’m quite serious. He watches you all the time.” For a second Dani wanted to tell her about the kiss. Like they were girlfriends reliving every exciting moment. But they weren’t friends. And Dani was still confused. She loved Nate, too, didn’t she? And even if she didn’t end up with Nate, he was her friend. She had to make sure he was getting a good woman. “Why Nate?” she said. “There must be loads of men in London lined up to date you.”
“I fell in love. That’s it.”
“And then you just said, ‘Hey, Nate, let’s move to London,’ and what? He just said, ‘Sure!’ ”
“I realize this is quite a sore spot for you.”
“I want to know how you talked him into it. That’s all.”
“If you must know, it was his idea.”
It felt like a physical blow. “It was his idea? It was Nate’s idea to move to London?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Did I outline the opportunities that could be there for an emerging artist? Yes. Do I want to move to London? Yes. Was I the one to bring the subject up? No. He’s ready to explore the world. I know he wasn’t two years ago when you were ready, and I’m sorry for you. Love is all in the timing, as they say.”
“As they say.”
“But here’s the difference. I would have married Nate whether we stayed in Wilmington or moved to London. Two years ago you couldn’t say the same.”
“I couldn’t live in London, I’m not a citizen.” Anya laughed and playfully pushed Dani. I could playfully push her back, Dani thought. Right over the side of the boat. “He’s always going to be a grandmother’s boy, you know,” Dani said.
“I know that. Ruth is welcome to visit anytime she likes. It’s because of her that we’re having the wedding here.”
“If you really want her to like you, you wouldn’t take her only grandson off to London,” Dani said.
“Then we’d be living our lives for her and not for us,” Anya said.
“I haven’t heard you mention Loretta and John,” Dani said.
“When do they arrive?” Nate’s parents moved to Florida the year before Dani left for New York. The last time she’d seen them in person, she’d been Nate’s girlfriend. Ruth was John’s mother. Dani was surprised they had been “allowed” to move out of Wilmington. Of course John was in his late fifties, finally old enough to stand up to his mother.
“They’re here,” Anya said. “They’ve been here.”
“Since when?” Dani said.
“A few weeks.”
“I see,” Dani said. Loretta and John always said they loved her like a daughter. But they hadn’t answered her letters or calls in two years, either. And surely they knew she was in town by now. Heck, they probably knew the moment she landed at the airport. Small towns thrived on gossip. Yet she hadn’t heard from them. Hurt welled up in her all over again. Sawyer was right. Everyone had moved on but her. And, apparently, Ruth.
“You know, the more I drink, the more I like you,” Anya said pushing Dani again.
“Bottoms up, then,” Dani said. She glanced at the sky. It was getting colder, and it smelled like rain. That might make their dreams a little choppy. She had to admit, the thought of sleeping in close proximity to Sawyer was making her insides light up.
“Now, what can I do to make Ruth like me?”
Dani was feeling a little tipsy. And a little annoyed that Anya kept pushing her. Why had she let Sawyer almost stop her from what she came here to do? She came here to get Nate back. Besides, if she didn’t at least try, she wouldn’t have an article to write, now, would she? “If you want Ruth to like you, she has to respect you. The only way she’s going to respect you is if you show some pride in where you come from. Just like she does.”
Anya took another sip of her wine, then staggered back. “How do I do that?”
“How many glasses have you had?” Dani asked.
“One and a half,” Anya said. “I’m blotto!”
“One and a half glasses?”
“I don’t normally drink,” Anya said.
“So why are you?”
“Because you’ve been making me nervous. The fact that you’re even here, so close to my wedding, is making me nervous.”
“I thought Europeans drank a lot,” Dani said. Note to self: Anya cannot handle liquor. Dani wondered how she would react after a couple of Dark and Stormys. A few of those and she might really cause a scene. The type of scene that Nate would loathe. The type he probably thought his prim and proper fiancé would never cause.
“You seem to have a lot of preconceived notions about us Europeans. Don’t you?” Anya said.
Why not? Dani thought. Were the French the only ones allowed to look down their noses? “You know what? You’re right. I do. Ruth does, too. So what you need to do—that is if you want her to respect you—is show her who you really are.”
“You mean, open up and show her my vulnerable side?”
“God, no. Ruth hates vulnerability. I just meant you should incorporate some of your British traditions into the gala. Don’t you guys wear silly paper hats, and open Christmas Crackers, and whatnot?”
“Ruth would go mental if I tried to do anything like that.”
“How about a British flag? You could hang it on her front porch.”
“You’re trying to get me in hot water,” Anya said. She tried to point at Dani but her finger kept weaving.
“If you showed a little pride in who you are and where you come from, she would respect you. And then admire you. And finally, like you.”
“Do you really think so?”
“I know. When we tour the Burgwin-Wright House, you can add your two cents about the British in Wilmington.”
“Oh. To be honest I’m not quite up on it.”
“Google it. General Craig, Cornwallis—there’s a world of history at your fingertips.”
“Do you really think it will do any good?”
“If you act like a pushover, she’ll treat you like one.”
Anya sighed, then leaned over the rail and looked into the depths of the river. “She wishes you were marrying Nate instead.”
“I’m made in Wilmington. You can’t change that. But you can show her what you’re made of.”
Anya straightened up. “I suppose I could try it.”
“Just don’t shy away from it. If you’re going to do it, go all the way.” What was Dani doing? Ruth would have a heart attack. And wasn’t Dani just thinking that she liked Anya? Wasn’t she lusting after Sawyer? And oddly, wasn’t it true that she didn’t feel the same pull toward Nate anymore? She felt friendship, but she wasn’t thinking about ripping off her clothes. Still, she was a bit annoyed at Anya, and tired, and maybe a little tipsy. Besides, Anya probably wouldn’t go through with it. Stiff upper lip and all that. Her idea of making a scene was probably nothing to worry about.
“Thank you, Danielle.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“Now, would you like some advice?” Anya was in Dani’s face.
“Definitely not,” Dani said.