by Lauren Wood
I agreed and I told him I would, but he did owe me. “I will call you when I get her home safe.”
“Good, I will see you in the morning. Give me a ring when it is taken care of.”
This wasn’t my first go round with this sort of thing with Grey, but it had been a while since I had been put in this circumstance. I thought I recognized her from before, but I didn’t want to pretend that I knew who she was. It was hard for me to figure out one woman from the next because at the end of the day, they all pretty much looked the same. She was beautiful, all of Grey’s women were, but she didn’t stand out amongst the ones I had met in the past.
“Cassie.”
“Right, sorry. I knew that I had seen you before.”
“Yes, you were told to take me home last time Grey was done with me.”
I didn’t know what to say to that. She looked sad and I hated to be the man that did this, but it was better than the police being called and I was going to have to hold to that. I didn’t want to be that guy anymore, even though I had not but a few weeks ago decided that I wanted this more than the mundane driving job that I had now. Now that I had Celia waiting for me and my eyes had been opened, I didn’t want to deal with these women anymore or Grey’s bachelor life.
“He is married now Cassie.”
“But I am pregnant with his child.”
She didn’t look pregnant, but I couldn’t be sure. If she was, it wasn’t that far along and it meant that Grey was stepping out on his marriage. I couldn’t believe that, not after he was so involved in his family life, but I wasn’t here to judge. I was here to take her home and I told her that I just wanted to make sure she was home safe.
“You can call him in the morning to straighten it all out Ma’am. My only job is to make sure that you get home safely and that is what I am going to do.”
She waved me off and followed me out the door. I could tell she was mad, but she wasn’t going to get loud with me and that was enough. Cassie seemed nice and in a way I felt bad for her. Grey had broken a lot of hearts in his time and it wasn’t the first time that a woman had claimed to be pregnant by him. It was because they wanted to hold on to anything that they could, even if it meant that she wasn’t going to be able to hold onto her dignity.
“Where do you want to go?”
She gave me an address and sat back in the plush seats. She was tearing up and it made me feel worse. I hadn’t really thought about Grey as a bad guy, me either for that matter, but I could see now that our actions weren’t always the best. I had looked at women all wrong in the past. I think that falling for Celia had given me another way to look at things and I thought to myself how I didn’t want Celia to ever be as upset as Cassie was sitting behind me.
“Would you like a tissue?”
She told me that she didn’t, watching the night lights pass us by as she angrily wiped her eyes with the back of one finger.
“I just wanted him to talk to me. How hard is that? He didn’t have to call you out and embarrass me further. He could have just talked to me. A man makes love to you like that, there should be something more than a goodbye. He owes you something. I don’t care if he has moved on to the next one. It doesn’t mean that I didn’t exist at all and I don’t have any feelings.”
I felt for her, I really did, but I had always tried hard to stay out of this sort of thing. I didn’t want to get in it, but I felt like I had to say something.
“I am sure that he doesn’t feel that way Cassie, but Grey changed after he got married. He isn’t going out with anyone else.”
“Why didn’t he change for me though?”
It was a question that I didn’t have an answer to and I was dumbfounded at what to say. I really wasn’t good at this sort of thing, never had been. That was why I liked my women free or married. Then they wouldn’t want anything more to do with me when I was done.
The phone rang and I was relieved to get a distraction. I was hoping that it was Grey, since he was the one that got me involved in this sticky business in the first place, but instead it was Celia. She was the last person that I wanted to talk to right now and I wished I hadn’t answered the phone.
“Hey baby. I was hoping you would still be asleep.”
“I must have woken up when you left. How long are you going to be gone? Your note didn’t leave much information so I was wondering if I should leave or not?”
“No Celia, please don’t. I don’t want you to go anywhere. I just have to take care of something real quick and then I will be back.”
“You have to take care of something at three o clock in the morning?”
It looked bad, I knew that, but I didn’t want to tell her what was going on. I didn’t think she would appreciate it, especially after the last conversation that she had caught me in with Grey. I knew that he was a good guy that had changed his ways, but to her he was still cheating scum, maybe she saw me that way as well and I didn’t want her taking off again because of a misunderstanding.
“It is just something that I have to do for an employer.”
“Why don’t you tell her that you are just dropping off one of his whores? I bet that would make things easier Leo.”
I sighed as Cassie piped in from the back seat, but it was too late. Celia hung up and I had no illusions that she would be there when I got home. I had blown it or rather had it blown with her again and I was starting to really hate my job and Grey at the moment. How was I ever going to find and keep her, if I couldn’t keep my job away from her? Why did Grey get to be the good guy and now I was back to square one. More importantly, how was I going to explain this one away?
Chapter 13
Celia
When I heard the woman talking in the background, I should have known what was going on. I should have known that he was that type of guy. The sad part was that I did know, but I didn’t want to believe it. I had gone to him after he came to the restaurant because I wanted to believe that I was wrong. Now I know that I wasn’t and after what we had done a couple of hours before, I was more devastated than I cared to admit. It was always going to be this way, but now it hurt even more because of how much pleasure he had given me. Leo had made me feel loved or at least wanted for a few moments and I don’t know why I needed it so much.
I felt devastated and I couldn’t get out of his place fast enough. I couldn’t find my underwear, but I gave up after a few minutes, afraid that he would somehow show up before I left. I couldn’t meet his gaze and I didn’t want to talk to him. It was literally the last thing that I wanted to do was say a word to him.
So I left the undies and made sure that I was out of there as soon as possible. The last thing I wanted was to be there when he got back or to ever see him again. He had left me at his house to be with another woman. I couldn’t believe that I had been so stupid and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I had brought it on myself. I was the idiot and I wasn’t going to be that moron again, not for Leo or any other man.
I told myself that I wasn’t going to cry. I had only known him a short time, but when I give my body away like that, it was hard for me to detach from feelings I didn’t want to think about what happened next. I just wanted to take a shower and wash the man away. It was a mistake that I was going to regret for some time, but it wasn’t the end of the world. I had to keep repeating that to myself. I was now Betty.
***
The next day I quit my job and made sure that my boss and the people I worked with knew that I didn’t want my address given out. It was the only way he knew how to reach me and it was the last thing that I wanted. I never wanted to see Leo again and I was going to do everything in my power to make sure that I didn’t. A stronger woman would have just told him off, but Leo had some kind of power over me that I couldn’t really deal with at the moment and the last thing that I wanted to do was slide back into it. I needed to keep myself away from him. To me, it was the only way and I was angry at myself for the weakness.
Afte
r losing my job, I figured that I was going to have to find another one. The restaurant was a newer job, so it wasn’t going to be too hard to replace. There were a lot of places to work in the city and after a couple of hours, I had another job secured and I could breathe again. Knowing that I wasn’t going to see him anymore was all that I needed and I was starting to feel better about everything. My only regret now was that I had caved before and went home with Leo. It was a mistake that I wasn’t going to make again.
***
Months went by and I thought about Leo less and less. It was all a bad dream or a lesson learned whichever way I was leaning for the day. I even got back into dating. I had run into Carlos and though at first I wasn’t sure how it would work out, I was surprised at how nice he was. He had dated a co-worker of mine in the past, but not everything works out.
Carlos was good to me and we went slowly because my heart was in pieces from Leo. I had my guard up from all men and the more I tried to fight it, the more I realized that I didn’t want to be alone. I was more emotional nowadays, but still I made sure that I was careful. I knew what men like Carlos and Leo could do to me. I was too trusting, but now that part of me had changed.
We were talking about moving in together when I realized that everything was not as it was supposed to be. I hadn’t had a time of month in months, which wasn’t unusual for me, but when I heard a comment that my boobs were getting bigger it got me thinking about something that I didn’t want to think about. I wasn’t promiscuous, so if for some reason I was pregnant, I knew whose it would be.
I didn’t tell Carlos about it because I didn’t know how to tell him. I went to the doctor and got the news that I was dreading to hear. I was almost four months along and the extra little pooch of my stomach was not too many nights out to dinner, it was actually something more.
Now I had to tell Carlos because it was only fair to him and I found it hard to deal with. It didn’t even occur to me to tell Leo about it. Not yet anyways. I had a feeling I knew how he was going to respond and I wanted to get things squared away with Carlos first. We had built something on trust and I had to hold on to that. I just hoped that he would understand, but I really didn’t know what he was going to do or say about it when I told him. I just needed everything out in the open before all of this came out. It wasn’t going to be long before I could hide the secret no more, so I had to say something now.
Carlos was getting off of work and I was trying to figure out how I was going to tell him. We were talking about moving in together, but I didn’t know if this was going to change things. I felt like it might because of the fact that I was pregnant with another man’s baby. It wasn’t ideal, not by a long shot and I was getting nervous as I waited for him to come by when I decided that I had to tell him.
When he did show up, he kissed me on the cheek and then on the lips, telling me how he had missed me. I had seen him this morning, but a lot had changed since then and it wasn’t for the good. It was all moving too fast, like a snowball gaining speed and getting bigger as it went. How was he going to react when he found out? I tried to gauge how I would react and I can’t say that I really knew what I would do if the tables were turned.
“Carlos, we need to talk…”
He groaned and told me that it didn’t sound good. I didn’t know what to say, but I finally just came out with it in a blurting fashion and watched his face change. It wasn’t at all what I had hoped for, but I knew that it was a lot to take on and I figured that it would be best if I let him absorb it all before I did anything else.
“Are you sure?”
I nodded that I was and I told him how far along I was. It was obviously not his and I wanted him to understand that right off the bat. It was another man’s child and even though we were getting serious, I knew that all of that might change. I almost expected it to.
He wanted to know who it was and I told him that it was Leo. Carlos knew about Leo from when we first got together and he just kind of stared off into space for a while. I was making dinner and I finished before he said much of anything else. He was shocked, as was I when I first found out, so I knew that I was going to have to wait it out.
“Have you told him yet?”
I told him that I hadn’t. “No, I don’t think he will want to know honestly. He really isn’t that kind of guy to want a family.”
“I want to talk to him Celia.”
I agreed because I knew that he was going to do it one way or another, but I wasn’t too happy about it. It was all just one big mess.
Chapter 14
Leo
I tried to find her, but Celia was a hard woman to find, especially when she went out of her way to make sure that I couldn’t find her. All I had left of her was a pair of underwear that she had left behind that I found a week later under the bed. I swear it was like it was just there to remind me of what I had lost and I wasn’t too happy about it. I didn’t tell Grey what was going on, but he finally figured it out. I blew up after another late night strumpet was picked up from his place. His life was getting in the way of mine, but no amount of being upset seemed to help. I just had to get it through my head that she was gone.
One night a few months later I was playing a Christmas special down at the bar, but I wasn’t feeling so cheery. The lights and the cheer weren’t there for me. Nothing was looking like it was going to be okay. I wanted Celia back and if I could have one thing, it would have been her. Because she wasn’t in my life, I didn’t want Christmas. Usually I dressed up and tried to bring cheer, but there was none of it this time around. I had lost the very thing that made the holiday great.
I saw a familiar face that I hadn’t seen in a while and even that wasn’t enough to get me out of my Christmas funk. Carlos was a regular, but then he dropped off the face of the earth for a couple of months. I was happy to see him and waved during the first set when I saw him in the crowd. It wasn’t long before it was clear that he wasn’t as happy to see me as I was to see him though. He had a look in his eyes that I didn’t quite understand. We had always been friendly, if not friends, but something had changed.
I didn’t get a chance to ask him about it because he was walking up to me before I could go to him.
“Hey Carlos. What have you been up to?”
He didn’t share my grin and I tempered my own, trying to figure out what his deal was.
“I have been better. I got some news last night that I don’t really like to hear.”
It had to be serious for the free-spirited man to look so upset. I asked him what was going on as I ordered us a couple of drinks. It didn’t look like he was too keen to share, so I was going to have to be patient if I wanted to know. The fact that it was me he was eying told me that maybe I did need to know what it was that had him upset. Why did I get the feeling that it was because of me somehow?
“So what is going on man? Why are you looking so down?”
“I got some bad news from my girlfriend and I don’t know what to do about it.”
“I didn’t know you were dating anyone special. Good on you.”
“Yeah, Celia is great. I think you know her.”
My heart stopped beating for a minute so that I could hear what he was saying. Was he talking about my Celia?
“Celia?”
Carlos chuckled and I knew that he was talking about my Celia. I hadn’t seen her in months and we had only had a few conversations, but as soon as I met her in the bar I had thought of her as mine.
“Yeah.”
“So the two of you are seeing each other?”
He nodded his head and took a drink of his beer. What was his problem and why was he looking at me like he wanted to rip my head off? I just didn’t get it really. I was the one that should be mad. I had been looking all over for her, unable to get her off of my mind and now I come to find out that she had moved on and with a guy like Carlos. He was nice as a friend, always good for a laugh, but there was also the rumors of how he really was with women. He ha
d worked through all of the pretty girls at the bar. I didn’t like the idea of him with Celia and I was afraid he was going to hurt her.
“Yeah we have been seeing each other for a couple of months now, about three.”
“I don’t think I have ever heard of you dating anyone.”
“Yeah, well she is different, isn’t she?”
I couldn’t have agreed more. There was something with Celia and the more I thought about her now, the more I missed her and the more I wanted to punch the smiling man in front of me. I had no choice but to make comparisons between us. We were alike in many ways, but why had she chosen Carlos? It just didn’t make any sense to me really.
“Yeah she is something else. I am glad to hear that she is doing well. I haven’t seen her in quite some time.”
“I know.”
Carlos had this smug look on his face and I wasn’t sure what to say to it. He seemed to know too much and I was aching to ask him what the hell had happened. Why had she disappeared like she did? But pride stood in the way and I wasn’t sure what to say. This was not what I had expected when I came in here this afternoon. I figured that I would jam out and go home to miss my Celia. Was this some kind of sign and did it mean that I was going to get to see her again?
“So what can I do for you Carlos? You seem to have something on your mind that you want to say to me.”
“I do actually. I wanted to talk to you about Celia.”
“Well like you say, I haven’t seen her in quite some time so I am not sure how I can help.”
Carlos nodded and I could tell he was trying to find the right way to say something. I don’t know what was going on in his mind, but the way he was acting did bother me a little bit. I don’t know what is going on and I don’t like this feeling one bit.