by M. O. Kenyan
Katherine nearly jumped out of her skin when the door opened. Rose held it ajar and held her charts out to her. “Lacey and Katy Perry are both clean. But ‘Katy Perry’ is pregnant.” Rose’s mocking tone told Katherine that she knew something. Sure Katy Perry wasn’t the most inconspicuous name she could come up with, but Lacey was singing one of her songs at the time and she didn’t think.
“So, Katy Perry?” Rose’s tone suggested she wanted to know more about the story. Ha! Fat chance.
“I think she’s a runaway teenager.” She hoped the nonchalant tone in her voice would get Rose to back off. “I have to see my patient now, excuse me.”
Katherine grabbed the charts and as soon as she walked around the corner and was out of Rose’s line of sight, she frantically flipped through ‘Katy Perry’s’ test results. She was pregnant. Now all that was left to do was figure out who the baby’s daddy was. Katherine ordered a portable scan, pretending it was for a patient. She wasn’t an obgyn but she figured she had enough skills to read the age of a fetus from a scan. She sat on a gurney in the abandoned operating room and held the joystick to her belly.
When nothing registered on the screen she drew in a breath of relief. Maybe the lab had got the samples mixed up. Her relief was short lived when she realized the scan was still off. Cautious of the maternal instinct that apparently existed in every single woman, she turned it on once the scan was ready, she held it to her stomach again, and there it was. The fetus looked at least four weeks old.
Her heart somersaulted from joy. She didn’t think she could have handled carrying Lyle’s baby. Explaining to AJ would have been a disaster.
But what said this wouldn’t be? AJ grew up in a loving family, she was sure Rosalinda and Adrian Senior would be overjoyed about their first grandchild. But her parents definitely wouldn’t be. She still didn’t know what her father held against Senior. Anyway, first she needed to figure out what AJ thought of having a baby this early in life.
Katherine ordered AJ’s favorite takeout when she got home. She thought a fully loaded carnivore’s pizza would soften the blow. She sat agitated as the hour ticked by. At first she had come up with a couple of excuses as to why she should delay telling AJ. She hoped he would come in and talk about how difficult his day was, or he had some major surgery he had to prepare for. But when AJ finally came home, he didn’t look tired or stressed out.
“How was your day?”
“It was the best. I took out a spleen, cast a broken leg and took out a beer bottle from a frat boy’s ear.” he laughed. “University wasn’t that dangerous when I was there.”
“I guess they were doing something stupid.” She swallowed back the lump in her throat. Tell him now, her conscience urged. “AJ, have you thought about having kids with this career?”
“I never thought about it,” he mused. “Our hours are crazy. But if you did get pregnant, I expect you’d take a year off to take care of the baby.”
“What!” she scoffed.
“I’m not trying to be a cave man or anything. But a baby needs parental attention. My mother stayed home with us, when Dad went to work.”
“No offense to Rosalinda, your mother is a wonderful person, but she didn’t have a career. I do, and taking a year off from Cardiology would set me back,” she protested.
“I’m sure you’ll feel differently when you get pregnant, which is not anytime soon.”
Katherine nodded in silent surprise. She was pregnant now and the thought of sacrificing her career for her child hadn’t occurred to her until now. Maybe she didn’t have that maternal instinct. Katherine retreated to the cover of her room. She needed to think about her options. Maybe if AJ’s answer had been different she would be sure about keeping the baby. But sitting next to AJ trying to figure out if she should do away with their love child wasn’t helping her.
* * * *
“AJ.” Katherine had made an appointment for the clinic late that night. It was a wonder an abortion clinic worked so late. She guessed they had to fit in the busy women who didn’t have time to go in the morning. Or maybe they knew what they were doing was wrong, and could only see that in the light of day. But she wasn’t going to get an abortion—she was just going to be briefed about the procedure. “Can I borrow your car? I need to run an errand before I go to work.”
“Something you need help with?” AJ walked toward her, Katherine wanted to turn away, run from the room. She couldn’t bare his touch right now. But she couldn’t command her body to move as she accepted AJ’s kiss.
“No, I’ll be fine.” She forced a weary smile.
“It’s in the bowl. I’ll see you at work.”
“Sure.” Katherine knew her mind must be clouded if she didn’t react to AJ’s chiseled features.
“I love you.”
“I know.” She smiled and ran out the door before her eyes betrayed her. Before she dropped down on her knees and begged the man she loved to forgive her for even thinking about getting rid of their baby.
Once Katherine was belted into the car and pulling into the road, she didn’t know exactly where she was headed. After seeing AJ that morning she knew she couldn’t go through with the abortion.
Instead she drove in the opposite direction of the clinic. Maybe she should go to Rosalinda and Adrian Senior’s town house. Rosalinda would know what to do. Maybe if she volunteered to take care of the baby, she wouldn’t have to give up her career. She could have both her family with AJ and her passion for healing people. That’s what I’ll do. She made up her mind and made the first turn she saw.
It was too late when she realized it was a one way. The truck was barreling toward her too fast. She stiffened in shock. Her mind shouting for her to flee, but her body had become a solid form incapable of moving. A second is all it took, and the decision for life was out of her hands.
* * * *
“What have we got?” AJ met the ambulance at the emergency bay.
“Head trauma and possible internal injuries, no broken bones or anything we can see externally,” the paramedic barked out without a breath.
AJ grabbed the foot of the gurney and pulled it through the emergency room doors. “Do we have an ID? What the hell happened?”
“Range Rover versus a meat truck. Meat truck won, but the Range Rover didn’t take such a bad beating.” The paramedic said.
“Those cars are resilient. I own one.” AJ put in. “All right, let’s take a look at this guy.”
“Girl, blonde beauty, I think her license said Katherine Henry.”
The sound of her name was a halt. Panic ripped through him, his heart racing, skipping and skipping. AJ took a look at her, his gaze skimmed over her. She didn’t look broken, but this lifeless body, with blood staining her perfect blonde hair was his Katherine. He stumbled back as a knot formed in his chest. The sight of her pale form knocked the wind out of him. It didn’t take a genius to figure out he felt helpless in this situation.
“Adrian!”
AJ whipped his head up and met his mentor’s gaze. “She’s going to be fine.” He saw him mouth.
“Where is the portable scan? Let’s check for any internal damages. We need to figure out where this blood is coming from.”
“Blood?” The copper scent attacked his nostrils. He could almost taste it in his mouth. That only fueled his panic. What if there were massive internal damages and they were too late? His throat closed at the very thought. “We need to get her into the emergency room”
“I understand this is emotional for you, and a great shock, so I’m going to excuse that rash decision. We can’t just cut into her; we need to find the…source.”
“What?” The tone in his mentor’s voice told AJ they had found something.
“AJ, I’m sorry but Katherine lost the baby.”
“Baby, what baby?” AJ was convinced he was the sole sane person in the room. “She’s bleeding internally, we need to help her.”
“There are no internal injuries AJ. She’s
bleeding vaginally. I’m sorry, AJ,” he said. “Let’s get Doctor Henry an MRI, figure out what’s going on in her head.”
“Listen to me.” The desperation in AJ’s voice echoed through the Emergency Room. “She wasn’t pregnant, she would have told me. We need to figure out what’s wrong with her.”
“Calm down, I’ll take care of her.”
AJ later sat in Katherine’s room. He couldn’t shake the cold shiver which kept running through him since he’d watched the doctors and nurse roll Katherine away from him. Having her in front of him still didn’t feel real. His heart was finally beating at a normal pace, but he was sure this dark cloud wouldn’t lift until she opened her eyes.
He choked out a laugh. She had come out of the wreck with just a bang on the head; enough to knock her unconscious, but not serious enough to cause any lasting damage. But when she woke up she would have a massive headache. She had literally been hit by a truck and she would feel the effect in every inch of her body.
AJ dreaded having to tell her about the baby. He was such an idiot. He should have realized Katherine had been fishing for answers the previous night. Obviously she hadn’t heard what she had expected. He could imagine her shock when he suggested, no demanded, she give up a year of her life for their baby. Katherine definitely disagreed with that plan, so where was she going that morning? A horrible dread filled his heart, but AJ shook it off. She would never do that.
* * * *
Katherine could hear the panic shrill of her voice pierce her eardrums. She was trapped and she was going to die. She felt the atmosphere around her thickening. There was a weird smell then the air was cracking and making her nerves tingle. What the hell was that, was the car going to explode? She couldn’t get her seat belt free. It took her a while to register she was hanging upside down. Blood streaked her blonde hair and immediately she thought her brains had blown out.
Don’t be an idiot, she chastised herself. She saw feet rushing toward her. If the car was about to blow they would be running the other way, wouldn’t they? The rational side of her took control and that permitted the doctor in her to come through. She did a check on her body; she still had function of her limbs. That meant her spine was fine, and her bones were still intact. Besides her pounding, bleeding head, she seemed to have come out unscathed. It didn’t take a second for that thought to settle when a sharp pain claimed her mid-section.
Katherine sat up on the bed with a start, her arms around her belly, a panicked shrill escaping her mouth. AJ could see the confusion on her face, but she seemed to remember the accident just fine. He rushed to her side and stroked her hair back, away from her face.
“What happened?”
“You were in an accident—”
“No, what happened to the baby?” Her eyes widened, beseeching him to tell her their child had survived. AJ thought about lying to her, about telling her the truth once she was fully recovered. But someone else could tell her when he wasn’t around and that would piss Katherine off.
His voice cracked with the age he seemed to have acquired in the past two hours. He swallowed hard then said. “Sweetheart, we lost the baby.”
“No!” she gasped.
“It’s okay.” He sat next to her on the bed and drew her into his arms.
“It’s my fault. God is punishing me for what I was about to do,” she said in a barely audible tone filled with remorse.
“What do you mean, Katherine?” AJ pulled back, the dread he had felt for the umpteenth time that day came back. It tugged at him, sinking into his gut and lower, dragging him down. “What are you saying, Katherine?”
“After what you said about taking a year off, I didn’t know what to do.” A tear rolled down her pale, grief stricken face. And for the first time since he met her, he didn’t have the urge to catch it or comfort her. Instead AJ got off the bed and moved away. He didn’t trust himself to rein in his anger. “I was going to go to the abortion clinic.”
“What?” Shock rushed through him as he gasped, then repeated with sudden savagery. “What!”
“I changed my mind. I decided to go see your mother instead.” Her voice was pleading but AJ blocked out the pain in it.
“What did you want my mama to do? Pray for your soul before you killed my baby?”
“Please, AJ,” she begged. “I was going to ask her if she could take care of the baby. That way I wouldn’t have to give up my career.”
“I didn’t ask you to give it up. I only wanted you to take a year off.” He paced the room like a caged animal as the volcano inside him threatened to erupt.
“That’s too much. Why don’t you take the year off? Would you do it?” Her voice was just as low as his, but filled with earnestness.
AJ didn’t have a valid answer to her valid question. He had always assumed that all women were like his mama when it came to motherhood. He had no right to ask Katherine to take time off, if he wasn’t willing to do the same thing. But he couldn’t admit that. Not now when he was so angry. He took one last look at her and headed for the door.
“Can I come home?”
“Right now, with the way I feel, I don’t know if you have a home with me anymore.” Her shocked gasp tore through his heart. He needed space to mourn, alone. “I’ll call your brother to come pick you up. You can sign yourself out tonight if you want to. You just banged your head.”
“Your car—”
“I don’t care about that.” He walked back to her bed. “You are alive. That’s all that matters. I just need time and space right now.” He kissed the top of her head and ran out before she could call for him.
AJ took out his phone and called his sound board. “Reno, I need you.”
* * * *
The brutal attack of the senses from the smell of smoke and alcohol and from the loud booming of the music in a club was a huge contrast to the quiet and sterilized smell of the hospital. That was what AJ needed to unwind when having a tough day.
But today the solitude of his apartment was more appealing. A knock on the door announced the arrival of his guest and drinks. He was throwing a pity party for one.
“I brought the booze to you.” Reno said as he walked in with a bag filled with bottles of vodka. “Drink as much as you want. Drown your sorrows, and then call her.”
“I can’t.” AJ angrily swiped at the tears rolling down his cheeks. “She thought of killing my baby.”
“Then she decided to talk to your mother about it. She wasn’t heading toward the abortion clinic when that truck took her down—she was headed for your mother,” Reno said, and AJ couldn’t ignore the reasoning behind it. “She was scared and you asked her to give up what she has been working for so she could birth your baby. You are lucky she’s a sweet girl. If she was anything like Lisette you would have woken up without an important member of your body. Look at it this way, Katherine survived and the two of you can make another baby.”
AJ felt like a hand had fisted around his heart and was slowly squeezing the blood out. He expected it to stop any moment. If he felt this bad about a baby he didn’t know about, he couldn’t imagine how Katherine felt. He wanted to call her, but he couldn’t risk it. He was still angry and could say things he couldn’t take back. Tonight he would mourn and drink, and come morning he would call her.
* * * *
Katherine had never seen so much hate in a man’s eyes. The deadly firm voice in which he spoke to her terrified her. Sure, she knew AJ would never hit a woman but that didn’t stop her from feeling scared. The way he stared at her without blinking, seemingly without breathing, while the dark flicker in his eyes; the sun set storms burning through his eyes broke her heart.
She looked out the window as the buildings sped past her. Kit had been the only one she trusted to pick her up. She was going to her parent’s house, not her home. Sadness twisted through her as the realization sank through. AJ didn’t want her. And his parting kiss echoed her guilt in a low deliberate voice. She was the bad guy in this situ
ation. All she needed to do was give him time and space.
“We’re here.” Kit gave her a compassionate smile. He hadn’t asked why AJ was sending her home with him, instead of taking care of her himself. AJ was a doctor and her boyfriend, which was expected. But to explain that, would mean she had to explain the fight about the abortion. She couldn’t have Kit look at her as if she was a monster too.
“Mother made up your room. I’ll be your coma guy tonight,” he said teasingly. “AJ said I should wake you up every two hours. Make sure you don’t slip into a coma.”
“Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad,” she whispered, her hot breath forming a cloud on the window.
“Don’t say that.”
“When do you leave for the medical camp?” She whipped her head toward him and saw the pity gaze he afforded her. She didn’t need pity, she needed AJ.
“The day after tomorrow. But I can postpone it if you want.”
“No need, I don’t expect to be here that long.” Surely, a night without her would compel AJ to forgive her. She dug her hand into her jacket pocket and fisted her fingers around her cell phone, now her lifeline. She’d keep it plugged into the charger until AJ called. She wasn’t going to risk missing his calls. Her gaze shifted toward the house when she saw the front door open and her mother’s shadowy silhouette appeared. “Let’s go.”