Lilly’s words died on her lips as she stared past her and Sherri knew that TJ had exited the bathroom and could only pray that he’d at least wrapped a towel around his waist. Upon seeing the shock on Dana’s face as well, she knew better.
Turning around she was blessed with a frontal of TJ in all his erect glory and if not for her sister and friend, she would have liked to just look at him for a while.
He casually reached back into the bathroom and grabbing a towel, shook it out and wrapped it around his waist. Then he looked back at where the three of them stood gaping at him and grinned. He didn’t apologize for what they’d seen or even go back into the bathroom and close the door.
Instead he walked straight for the group, where Lilly and Dana scattered to clear a path for him. Sherri watched in both shock and amazement as he sidled past them all and headed toward her bedroom.
“I’ll be back here waiting… when you’re ready, Sherri,” he advised them before entering her bedroom and closing the door.
It was all she could do to turn back and face Dana and Lilly. When she finally did, they still wore looks of shock and appreciation. As if just as unsure what to say as Sherri, they suddenly made for the front door.
Before she lost the opportunity to try and explain she said, “I’m not going to say it isn’t what it looks like but please know that this changes nothing between the two of us. We’re still getting divorced,” she managed to choke out as Lilly opened the front door. “I just… I just had a moment of weakness.”
Dana and Lilly looked at each other before escaping through the screen door. Then Dana stopped mid-step and without looking back at her said, “You don’t owe us an explanation, Sherri. The heart wants what it wants. It may defy your mind and even logical explanation sometimes but it knows what it wants and needs.”
“Call me later if you need… to talk,” Lilly said before they both practically sprinted down the three steps of the front porch and ran to Dana’s van parked behind her car.
Closing the front door she leaned back against it and sighed. In some regards, Dana was right. She couldn’t continue to kid herself much longer.
Whatever issues lay between them, she still loved TJ Simons and if she didn’t face that in one way or another she would never get past it and her heart would continue to want what it wanted.
The only way to do that was to lay her cards on the table and tell him how she felt about him. How she felt about his leaving. How she felt about him being back now. How she felt about their future and what she thought it held for each of them.
Heading back down the hall to the bedroom, she braced herself for the temptation that lay behind door number one. Taking a deep breath so she could say what needed said, she opened the door to find him stretched out on her bed, naked as he’d been upon exiting the bathroom. He held himself in one hand, ensuring he was still as erect as he’d been for the audience in the other room.
Upon seeing the look on her face and knowing she had something important to say to him, he held his hand out to her. As she approached the bed slowly, he said, “Get in beside me and tell me whatever it is that’s on your mind. I swear I won’t touch you until you’ve had your say.”
He allowed her to lie down next to him keeping the towel safely tucked around her body. Once she was situated she said, “As much as I want to continue denying that I want you, we both know better. So we can have as much sex as it takes but at some point that won’t be enough for either one of us and you know it, TJ.”
“I’ve never denied to anyone, the fact that I haven’t stopped wanting you, Sherri,” he replied.
“I lost a part of myself when you left and have not been able to get rid of that feeling of inadequacy from you leaving. Was Nashville that important to you and how could you be with other women after telling me that I was everything to you?” she asked.
He was quiet for a minute before finally saying, “It wasn’t Nashville so much as trying to figure out if you were willing to support and encourage me to follow my dreams and goals. Why didn’t you want me to try and succeed on my own… outside of you and the bar? Why, Sherri? I was so young. I just needed to leave my own mark on the world… no matter how small that dent ended up being. Was that so much to ask?”
Silence lingered for several moments before he continued, “As for the women… they had nothing to do with it. They were filler… an opening act that I had never heard of and didn’t really care for anyway. In that regard you were the only one who ever mattered and knowing that I wasn’t important enough to you… nearly killed me.”
“Coming back here and opening up for more of that kind of rejection is probably one of the dumber things I’ve ever done but after seeing you that day in the auditorium… I couldn’t help myself. It’s like being booed off stage only to find that somewhere deep inside… you have to try just one more time… even if you suspect it will probably happen again,” he finished quietly.
Hot tears trickled down her cheeks. His words sounded so sincere but he had it all wrong. He’d told her that he wanted to go to Nashville, try to record a few songs to get his name out there and would be leaving in a few days.
What he hadn’t told her was how important it was to him for her go with him. When she’d talked to Gina about going and having to close the bar down for a while, Gina had suggested that she just wait until he arrived in Nashville and got settled. Once he made it up there he would call her and then she could close up the bar and join him to see how it went.
When she came home two days later to find him gone with not even a goodbye, Gina had told her that he would call. When a couple of weeks passed with no word, she was worried sick and ready to leave for Nashville when Gina had offered to go find him.
She’d promised to call as soon as she found him. Four days later, Gina had returned telling her that TJ had moved on… musically and romantically. It had been a pain like no other… but now it felt like something was missing. Why wasn’t he being honest about the woman he’d left with?
“I’m not sure there could ever be anything more between us, TJ. We simply don’t trust each other anymore. How can we even think of anything more than just sex when we are constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop?” she asked.
“I hear what you are saying and in some respects you are right about that. How could we be successful the second time around when we have all this baggage that we didn’t have the first time… when we failed? At the same time, the fact is that your body still makes me into a mad man after all these years. I could exist on nothing but the taste of you for days… How can I still want you so badly if there’s nothing but distrust between us? There has to be something else there besides wariness.”
“Like what?” she asked.
“Like love. I still love you, Sherri. I always have… always will. No matter how badly you hurt me sometimes… I can make myself not trust you, I can make myself not touch you but I can’t make myself stop loving you. I’ve tried and I failed at that worse than I failed at keeping our marriage together,” he replied.
It was time to sink or swim. With a whisper she said, “I still love you too… God help me, but I do.”
The next thing she knew the towel was no longer wrapped around her. He had taken its place. Unlike the angry passion of the last time they’d been together, this time there were no words spoken. No orders given. No one in control or being controlled.
Instead there was all-consuming touching. Kisses that made her heart skip a beat and her body sticky. Shared looks of ecstasy between them that seemed to be the truth in their words.
He was still in love with her and she loved him right back. All the fighting and hate filled words were defeated with that one confession between them.
The following evening as she manned the bar, she was surprised to see Chris Anderson come in and sit on one of the stools. Knowing he must be aware that she and TJ were together again or at least sleeping together, she approached him with hesitation.
; Setting a napkin, some silverware and a menu before him she said, “What brings you in here?”
“Look, I know you’re back with TJ and whatever we had is over. I’ve accepted that fact. However, I hope that you still consider me a friend and know that I only wish the best for you,” he started. “I just think you need to back up from this thing with you and TJ and take a good look at the situation for what it really is.”
Feeling her defenses spring to life she crossed her arms and said, “We are just talking right now… that’s all. Not that it is any of your business.”
“I respect that. I just need to know that you are aware that he is also just talking to Gina as well. Tell me that you know that the two of them are… and that you don’t think that you are the only one and I’ll leave it be. You won’t hear another word about it from me,” he said, waving his hands as though giving up.
“You are lying, Chris, and need to get the fuck out of my bar… now!” she said.
“I’m not trying to be mean, or win you back, but I’ve seen and even heard some things that I thought you should know about. That’s the only reason I came in here tonight,” he said.
“Out…” she spat and pointed at the door while taking his silverware and menu back.
With a look that said she was stupid for not at least hearing him out, he got up and walked out. She threw the menu and silverware behind the bar and seeing that she’d already made a scene, headed back to her office.
TJ and Gina? That feeling that there was something more that she was missing in all this came back with a vengeance. If she were to leave and go to his house right now, what would she find? Was she just taking the first opportunity presented to her not to trust him or was this about preserving what was left of her pride, dignity and heart?
“We can handle things, if you need to leave. It’s less than three hours before last call so we’ll be fine. It’s already thinning out in here,” Lindsey offered from the doorway.
Less than half an hour later she got an answer to the questions whirling around from Chris’ visit to the bar, when she found Gina’s car parked outside of TJ’s place. It was just after eleven at night and along with Gina’s car being empty, all the lights were off in his apartment.
She felt like a sharp knife had just sliced open her heart all over again. That part of her wanted to go and bang on his door and demand to know what yesterday had been about. Especially since the very next day he was already sleeping with someone else.
Why couldn’t he have just been honest and told her that she would likely be one of many should she decide to continue sleeping with him.
Instead the last remnants of her pride and dignity drug her back home with them where she sobbed herself to sleep. She stayed in bed well past noon the following day waiting for the pain of being used yet again by TJ to overwhelm her and drag her to the depths of hell.
When that didn’t happen she finally checked her phone for messages and found a voicemail from Chris. She called him back and he asked if he could stop by after work to show her something.
She managed to feed herself, shower and dress before Lindsey showed up to get the last of her things. She was still there when Chris stopped by. He brought an envelope with him which he handed to her while Lindsey made herself scarce in the spare bedroom. The envelope contained picture after picture of Gina at TJ’s apartment.
Each new picture depicted Gina in a different outfit, getting out of her car which was parked in front of his apartment or walking up to his front door. Obviously, yesterday wasn’t the first time they’d been together.
Anger enough to make Sherri want to hit something flowed through her. She wondered if they’d been hooking up as far back as the first time when she’d caught them at his apartment.
“I’m sorry, Sherri. I didn’t want to be the one to tell you but damn it! Someone had to!” Chris said quietly.
The bitch had lied to her that day when she’d said that she was just attempting to keep TJ from bothering Sherri. Exactly how far had Gina taken the task of keeping TJ away from her? Had it included sleeping with her ex-husband… the man she was still legally married to? The man she still loved?
As if merely thinking about TJ was enough to conjure him out of thin air, she watched as his car came to a screeching halt alongside the curb out front. Within a second he was out and headed to her front door at a run.
He didn’t even bother to knock. Instead he was in her front living room and punching Chris in the face repeatedly before she knew what had happened.
Even though TJ was thinner than Chris by a good bit, anger, adrenaline and indignation were on his side. Within seconds he had Chris pinned to the floor of her living room. Then he pulled a gun out from the back of his pants and aimed it at Chris’ head.
“Tell her the truth fucker! Tell her now or I’ll spend more time in prison than you ever did slinging dope,” TJ yelled at Chris. Lindsey came to the doorway of the living room and was talking on her phone.
“I didn’t do anything…” Chris choked out around the grasp TJ had on his throat.
TJ hit Chris again, bloodying his nose and then said, “Fine… I’ll find the shit myself. It has to be somewhere in this house… my fucking house! If you move I promise I will at the very least beat you within an inch of your life.”
Lindsey disappeared for a moment only to return a few seconds later. Just as TJ was about to loosen his grip on Chris, Lindsey stepped into the room. She approached the two men cautiously and held out a bag of what Sherri thought were drugs of some sort, to TJ.
“I found it in my bedroom just now while I was packing. It’s not mine, though, I swear to God. I called Chuck because I didn’t know what to do,” she said hesitantly.
“I know that… he’s the one who called me after you told him that Chris was here now. You did the right thing, Lindsey. This piece of shit has been using my grandmother’s house to store his shit,” TJ ground out.
“I didn’t notice it when I first moved in here but I’m pretty sure it must’ve been here the whole time because I would have known if someone had been in my room or if anything had been moved around. It was in the very back of the closet behind this old mirror,” she said hesitantly, handing the bag to TJ. “I asked Chuck not to call the police because I don’t want Sherri to get in trouble for it and I know that there’s no way it’s hers. When I heard what you said to him when you came in, I figured this must be what you were out here talking about.”
“That’s fine, Lindsey. I understand your loyalty to Sherri for helping you out but I no longer feel that way about her and I care even less about what happens to this piece of shit,” TJ said, grasping the front of Chris’ shirt and shaking him a couple of times for good measure. “I’m calling the cops my damn self so if you don’t want to be here when they come, you might want to just get your things and go.”
Chapter Ten
He wasn’t sure who he was angrier at… Chris or Sherri. The look of shock on Sherri’s face which, replaced with anger as she looked at Chris, told him that she’d been clueless about the drugs. How she’d missed it, he didn’t know, but either way… she’d risked his childhood home by bringing home the asshole in the first place.
Once Lindsey was out the door, he looked down at Chris and said, “What else do you have stashed here, tell me and I may just allow you to walk out of here alive.”
“That right there in your hand isn’t chump change…” Chris stammered. “That’s all that I had here… I swear.”
“Well a drug dog will sniff out anything else. I just want to know how long you’ve been using my house as a place to store your shit?” he asked. When Chris didn’t answer quickly enough, he chambered a round and pointed the gun back at him.
“Since I started dating her. When she broke it off with me, I had no way to get back in to get it, especially back there in the spare room. Especially with you hanging around all the time,” Chris quickly explained. “I thought she’d eventually call and want to ge
t back with me so I could at least get it without breaking in.”
“So you’re a lousy lay and a bad boyfriend to boot. Why were you with this stupid fuck, Sherri?” he asked, glancing up at her.
He watched Sherri’s eyes until they landed on a pile of scattered photographs of Gina. The one closest to him depicted Gina in front of his apartment and he immediately understood.
Not only had Chris been a bad boyfriend but he was also a liar… every bit as big a liar as Gina. Sherri could have hurt him less by punching him in the balls than she did with the look of distrust and anger shining on her face when she turned back to gaze at him again.
Obviously some things between he and Sherri were never going to change. Maybe loving her really wasn’t enough to see them through their problems.
How could they possibly stand a chance if every time someone questioned his whereabouts or who he was with, she immediately thought the worst? Was this an indication of how their fledgling relationship would hold up?
“Did you take those pictures?” he asked Chris. “Were you and Gina hanging out near my apartment?”
This time Chris was quick to answer, “Gina and I were seeing each other briefly and then all the sudden she just refused to even talk to me. I followed her a few times just to see what she was up to. One day I found her parked outside your apartment. When I asked her what she was doing, she said she didn’t want anything to do with me anymore because you were the man she loved. Then she offered to help me get back with Sherri so that she could have you. I knew it was over between Sherri and me… but I needed to get my stuff back. So I was just going along with Gina in order to get it. I plan on moving out west in a couple of weeks. This was supposed to be a quick in and out deal and then I would be gone.”
Finally someone beside himself to spell out what a world class bitch Gina truly was to Sherri so he didn’t have too.
Spirited Ride Page 13