“Shh,” I scold him and give him a warning glare. I spin around on my chair and tap the bar top for a drink. “We don’t discuss this here, Eli. You know that. He’s out of town on business and no one else has wanted to fill the spot. Hence why I’ve been stuck up here with you, but you know that topic is a no go.”
“I don’t think we spoke about it actually,” Eli replies, grabbing a glass to start cleaning it. Just because Eli is bar staff doesn’t mean he misses the wrath of the Boss.
“Well that’s because there isn’t anything to talk about,” I retort, my voice pulled tight with panic that someone might overhear us. “Now, Eli, fix me a drink because I’m going to need it.”
It’s my first Saturday night without Jace. So far, I am free. Clara has me working the room, schmoozing, trying to get Luca some male interest. I’d rather be like the sales rep than the prostitute. I look over my shoulder and see Luca sitting with Carlson Bond. She doesn’t know what a moneybag she’s been taken in by, but I’m pretty sure if she knew she wouldn’t be so awkward.
We all say we aren’t in it for the money, but the richer the client, the wealthier our bank accounts. It’s a nasty perk to the job.
I hear a glass clink in front of me and twist back. I pick it up and drink the icy coldness of brandy that Eli just placed down. I don’t like strong liquor, but when my nerves are shot like tonight I need it. It’s what I love about Eli, he knows me like Jace does. The more the week has dragged on, the more my nerves have frayed. I know I’m biding my time with having no clients, and my nerves are feeling it.
“Take these drinks to table nine, please, Gilbert,” Eli orders me politely. I nod and take the tray, putting the drinks on it and leave without any drama. I watch Eli pull a face at me across the club and I suppress the laughter that bubbles within me.
“Excuse me,” I hear a voice and consequently feel a hand grip my wrist and spin me around.
I’m met with ferocious onyx eyes. They’re familiar and in a flash the memories catch up in my dazed mind, I immediately freeze. I don’t breath, I don’t blink and I don’t think my heart beats. The man before me shouldn’t be there. Rash panic flares up and I stumble back, slipping from his grasp. The man before me died. I should have died with him, but I didn’t. I feel like this is some evil trick and that’s when I notice the small scar on his lip and realize my rationality has gotten away from me. Whatever, the person before me still shouldn’t be here. My past is here - in The Viper Rooms. Oh shit. I look around for a quick getaway, but there isn’t one, and before I know it the man before me is speaking.
“Joely Gilbert,” he speaks and all of the blood rushes from my face. “It’s been a long time.”
I finally strive for a voice, needing some projection. I’m a head Viper Girl, men don’t intimidate me - even if I know them before I entered this life. “I’m sorry, but I’m busy,” I tell him, praying for composure.
“That’s fine,” he says and chuckles at me, “I’ll book a slot with you for tonight.” He then leans in closer to me. “I think we finally need a chat,” he whispers at me and pulls away. I see that look in his eyes. The ball’s in his court right now and he knows it. I feel fear erupt in me.
This was the one thing I never wanted to happen! I never wanted people who I loved and cared for seeing me like this. Some might say being a Viper Girl is a privilege, but once you’re one, you spend every day counting the days away until that stigma leaves you for good.
“No,” I disagree and shake my head. “Please don’t, Josh.” The moment I usher his name I become weaker than ever. “Please, don’t do this.” I’m not far off begging him and I will do so if necessary.
He steps back in, making this talk a little more private. “I will,” he states and his cold tone roils over me. “You and I really need to talk.”
I begin to shake my head, but I can see his decision is steadfast and it worries me. I haven’t had to deal with the matter of the past for years and I wish I could keep it that way. There are too many ghosts and demons from that one fateful night, but I realize that I’ve been running for so long I knew something was going to trip me up. But right now I cannot face it.
“Joely,” Clara breaks in. She comes to stand behind me. “Is something wrong here?”
I straighten up and look to Clara as she approaches. All my thoughts are gone, I can’t mess up now. “No, Boss,” I reply and smile. “This client was just leaving.”
“No!” Josh literally shouts and calms down when he sees the look Clara expresses. “Sorry, no, I’m not just leaving. I want to make a booking.”
Clara begins to leer at the proposition. No doubt she is seeing the dollar signs now. “For Joely?” she asks casually and Josh nods to her and I can feel my heart sink. I don’t want this. “She’s one of my priciest girls. Are you sure you can afford her?”
“Yes,” he admits quickly, no time for hesitation. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a wallet loaded with large bills. My eyes widen at the sight. Josh never had ambition to be anything important, but I can see that times have changed. “Whatever the price, I want two hours with Joely.” He flashes a glance at me before looking to Clara once again. “Tonight.”
“Do you have a business card?” Clara asks him abruptly and just smiles as Josh looks to her confused. “Sorry, I like to keep all of my clients’ names in a jar.” She motions over to the bar where a large, curved glass stands, full with cards. “I like to make sure you are who you say you are. I protect my girls.”
“Whatever,” Josh mutters and opens his wallet to grab a card. He passes it to Clara. “Is that okay? I’m Josh Phillips.”
Clara’s eyes lighten up at the sight. “You’re the Josh Phillips?” she asks clearly impressed. “As in Phillips Pharmaceuticals?”
As she mentions that everything slides into place. Josh has been in the city all along with his own company. He runs one of the biggest companies for marketing drugs across the world. I’m shocked, especially because the last time I saw him, he was dropping out of college and blaming me for ruining his life.
“The one and only,” he comments, pride oozing from his tone as he speaks. I’m in shock and stare at Josh. The guy who wasn’t bound for anything, has the world at his feet. “Now can I book her?”
“Of course,” Clara replies and nods her head curtly. She looks to me and I keep my head high and don’t let anything fall from my expression. When she’s sure about this decision and my willingness for a new client, she breaks into a smile as she’s back to counting the money she can get from my time with Josh. “Well Joely, I expect you to give Mr. Phillips the best treatment possible. Make his first time in The Viper Rooms memorable.” She turns to leave, but leans in, ready to tell me one final piece of information. “After this, you have another client until you clock off,” Clara tells me and I nod. “Go and get yourself and Mr. Phillips a drink and head to your room.”
“Okay, Boss,” I obey and look to Josh as we’re left alone. “What can I get you to drink?”
“A beer will do,” he answers simply.
“Okay,” I reply and swallow hard. “Do you want to stay out here or go to my room?” I ask him and see his expression. That talk he wants cannot wait. “Follow me.” I walk towards the bar with a heavy heart and I’m about to spend two hours with someone who, on our last encounter, made damn sure I knew how much he hated me. I don’t see a happy client at the end of this.
I quickly put an order in. Eli is on the job momentarily, placing the drinks upon a silver tray and I take the two drinks and walk towards my room. I make sure Josh is following me. I make it to my door; reach into my bra and pull the key out. I unlock the door and walk in, still with the tray of drinks in one hand and hold the door open for Josh to enter.
He takes the tray from me and I shut us away from the main room. When I turn back I see him standing there looking angrier than I have ever seen him before. He puts the tray down and turns back, now he looks livid. I suddenly feel intimidated a
nd I have no idea what’s going to come out of tonight.
“Joely, what the fuck are you caught up in?” he asks me and I don’t reply. “What are you doing here? You’re a fucking hooker! You left Florida for this?”
“No, I’m not a hooker,” I breathe out, realizing this is what I didn’t want them to find out. Everyone will think I’m selling myself. “And I left Florida because I couldn’t take all the blame.” I’m already crying. We’ve been locked in here for no more than two minutes and I’m already reduced to tears. “I couldn’t take being blamed for something I had no control over. I’m here because it saved me.”
“But look at what you are!” Josh shouts at me, his tone accusatory.
“I’m a Viper Girl and I’m damned good at it,” I try and fight my corner. I grapple at my defenses, using them through my watershed. “I’m here because I lost more than my best friend that day! I’m here because it saved me. I don’t care what you think of me, Josh, but you should care that our last chat was the final straw that sent me running.”
I see his fierce look break as remorse begins to shine through. “I regret that day.” That’s all he has to say to me.
I go and sit on the bed. I don’t have any other words, but I know if I’ve got to stay in here for two hours then I’m taking my heels off and relaxing the best I can. I push myself up the bed, reaching the headboard and pillows. I lean back against them getting comfortable. I can feel myself unravelling and it honestly scares me.
Josh just drops onto the end of the bed. He sits on the edge of the bed, shoulders slumped, head bowed and the silence is far more deafening than any other harsh word he could have thrown at me. But I can’t take the quiet and have to break it. It’s time to be honest and allow myself some form of closure.
“What happened to Dylan still haunts me,” I admit, breaking the stillness around us and Josh stands and comes to sit beside me. “I never go a day without forgetting what happened. It’s always on loop.” Josh reaches for my hand and I draw it away. As much as he’s my only close link to Dylan, it changes nothing. He still led the lynch mob that drove me from my home.
“That’s actually why I’m here. The anniversary is today,” he says and I’m thrown into the realism that he’s just another client. He has a story like all the other men that enter this place.
“I know,” I reply, my voice barely audible. “Like I could forget.” The silence settles in again. “You look identical to him now.” Even from behind just now, he looked exactly like his older brother. When we were younger, they looked nothing alike, but it seems that age made him into my best friend’s replica. “Except for the scar,” I add on, remembering the day he fell from the tree house in their family’s backyard. Dylan and I had laughed so hard, but we didn’t know how serious he could have been hurt. When he bounced to his feet, it just made it funnier.
“I get told that a lot,” he replies and sighs. “Why did you do this? Why did you become a Viper Girl? That was never you. That wasn’t the you I knew.”
“I’m not that girl anymore.” I hate this admittance, it’s dark and callous and it’s willing to swallow me whole. The Joely Gilbert who thrived on laughter and days at the beach was long left behind. “Wh-when I signed my contract here was when I was lost and vulnerable; by the time I realized I was trapped, it was too late. I couldn't back out."
"What are your parents going to say when they find out?" he asks me and dread bursts to life.
"They're not going to say anything. Josh, you must have signed a contract or something when you came in here. You don't speak of the club, and you certainly don't speak of us girls. We don’t exist outside of this place."
"I'm here as an added extra. I’m here as a guest with Carlson Bond," Josh points out and again, the success oozes from him. "I was briefed, but that was it. I'm not tied to this place at all." He swivels around and stares intently at me. "You do realize what you are, Joely, don't you?" he asks me softly and I nod my head. We all know the brand name we call ourselves is a mirage to the reality. "You can't live this life. It's not healthy."
"I told you I'm trapped. I have another three years before my contract ends. There is no getting out of this." I look down at my hands in my lap and just allow the tears to ribbon down my face. "I deserve this life for what I did."
"You did nothing wrong," he announces and my head shoots up to look at him. "After you left we found out the brakes were shoddy on the car. The garage claimed liability. There was no way you could have prevented that crash."
I look at him. I feel unhinged by this truth and I feel feral. I ran for nothing. "You all blamed me so much though. The stuff you said once I was out of the hospital will never leave me. The last look I got of Dylan will never leave me. How do I now believe that it wasn't my fault?" I feel like I’m spiraling out of control and I shoot up off of the bed. I’m shaking and I don’t know if it’s from how livid I am or if it’s because I’m in panic mode. My fight or flight needs are toying with me and I don’t know what to do. So I explode. “You all cast me out! You all told me I killed him by driving carelessly! I told you I hit a patch of oil or something on the road, I had no control!” I narrow my gaze upon him. “You made me feel like the biggest monster ever! Like I had gotten out of that crash lucky! I didn’t get out lucky!”
“Joely,” he says and sits up, but I don’t want him to kill my summation right now. I need to express it; I need to get it out of my system.
“Don’t!” I scold him, my voice nothing more than an angered hiss. “He promised me we were both getting out of that crash. When I was terrified, he promised me we were getting out. It didn’t matter that he was trapped, I was hurt and that was all that mattered to him. I remember the way he looked at me before I passed out. I heard his final words to me, telling me he loved me and that it wasn’t my fault. Imagine my surprise when I woke up in hospital to be told he had died. Imagine my surprise when none of my friends wanted to know and none of your family cared. How was I supposed to believe in what he told me when I was the driver?”
“It’s been over three years,” Josh starts to say to me. He’s calm and controlled and it’s a vast contrast between my current mood. “It’s time you stopped running. When I realized it was you at the bar, joking with that bartender, I knew it was you. Your smile hasn’t changed at all and neither has your laugh. But there is something missing. You’re missing. That little burst of happiness is gone and it hit me hard that I was probably the one who did it to you.”
“You finalized that,” I corrected him solemnly, slamming my arms over my chest. “I can’t go back there. Not now, not until I’m done here.”
“You can,” he states with such clarity, it makes me want to laugh at his foolishness. “Just take a few days, Joely, just a couple. Go home, see your parents. You have a life waiting for you when you’re done here.”
“I have a life waiting when I’m done here,” I retort sternly. He knows so little about me now. “There is no going back right now.”
He growls out loud - a trait his brother used to have all the time. “Why are you so resistant to leave, to run away?”
“I found the man I love here,” I admit to him and I break into a smile. Only with Jace am I the Joely Gilbert I was before that horrible day. “I won’t risk losing him for anything, Josh. So please don’t jeopardize that for me.” I’m looking for every bargaining chip I can here, but Josh begins to move. He gets up, maneuvering towards me and I know I don’t have the fight.
When he takes my hand this time, I don’t withdraw. “I won’t, as long as you keep me in your life. We have a lot of catching up to do.”
It’s an ultimatum I’m willing to take. “You might want to sign a contract then,” I joke with him. “Then book a slot with me and we can catch up all you want.”
The smirk that sprawls onto his lips tells me that my days of running are becoming shorter.
***
An hour later, Josh finally allowed me to leave the room. He praised
me to Clara and consequently asked for a contract. What Clara doesn’t know won’t hurt her - or me. I watch from the bar as Clara’s face ignites and she looks over to me with utmost amazement. She allows one of the other girls, Claire, to take control of Josh’s contract and heads towards me.
“Well done,” she tells me, I can tell she’s impressed. “Now you’re done with him, there’s another new member who signed up after witnessing you at the last party. He wanted you or Luca, but she’s busy right now with Carlson Bond.” I hear that name again and I just think immediately of Josh. “I’ve had Mr. Roberts escorted to your room. He wants the total package.”
My eyes widen and I quickly grapple back a stoic, cooler complexion. I know what total package means and it sends anxiety rabid in my veins.
“He likes a bit of the kinkier stuff too,” she tells me and I know this is it - the judgment call. It’s dawned, like I knew it would. “I think he wants to dominate the session.” I freeze at the thought. I used to not care what men wanted, but now it’s all I think of. “Joely?” she asks me and puts her hand to my shoulder to shake me. “You seem off, dear. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I tell her and smile. It’s the best I can do to cover up my sudden silent behavior. “How long do I have?”
“An hour,” she alerts me and then disappears. The moment she moves I’m faced with my door. Taking a deep breath, I take the relevant steps.
I walk to my room, head held high, but in reality I feel like I’m walking to my doom. I can’t turn back now. If I do, I have to explain myself, and I will not risk anything in my life when it feels like it’s heading towards the right track. I knock and enter and find Mr. Roberts sitting on the edge of the bed. He stands the moment I’m in the room and all my front, all my courage disappears.
Saturdays at the Viper Rooms Page 12