by Lacey Silks
“No expectations, Chloe. Just making an observation.”
The elevator door opened. As soon as we got inside, I found myself backed against the mirror wall and trapped between his strong arms. I couldn’t resist gawking at the bulging biceps and enjoying the pressure of his hard chest and abs on my body. Not to mention the heat radiating off him — it was enough to start the next cycle of global warming. As much as I wanted to knee him, I didn’t. I wouldn’t do anything stupid to be robbed of his heat. This man was a danger to the planet, and I was certain he didn’t realize it. Which only drew me to him that much more. He was the black hole in the universe, slowly sucking me into its deep black void.
“Look, I’m not used to being nice to strangers. I usually keep my business to myself and navigate stormy waters on my own. But I’m trying my hardest here to extend a friendly hand, so cut me some slack, will you?”
“Why are you trying?” My passive whisper surprised me. The tension around the corners of his jaw eased. His eyes brightened and hinted at many questions I didn’t even know I wanted answered. He lowered his hand to my cheek and smoothed his thumb over my skin. “I don’t know, Chloe. I really don’t know.”
And then he backed away. I felt naked without his warmth, but from that moment on, he kept his distance. It was as if he were afraid of me — that somehow being close to me would change him.
I didn’t want to change him. I liked him the way he was: handsome and dangerous, perplexing yet familiar. Little did I know, it would take another year to find Axel’s true calling. It would take a beautiful miracle for him to realize that all the love he had in his heart was meant for greater good.
Chapter 4
We walked down the street to a nearby diner. I couldn’t stop looking over my shoulder until we were seated. After my second burger, though, when Dwayne didn’t show, I relaxed. It was almost midnight, and the joint was slowly filling up with hungry party goers who had decided to return home at a more reasonable hour. The smell of grease intensified as orders of fries, grilled cheese sandwiches, and burgers came ringing through every few minutes.
“You got a place to stay?” he asked, digging into his sundae. Yup, dessert round was even better than the first two burgers. I didn’t reply. It was too difficult concentrating on his lips touching the cold cream and his tongue darting in and out of his mouth to answer. Plus, there was no point in telling him that I was homeless. He didn’t look like someone who’d understand.
“I take that as a no. What about family? Friends? What—”
“Look,” I interrupted. “Can we make a rule? You don’t ask questions about my life, and I don’t ask you why you have a gun around your ankle or what you do for a living. Okay?”
He set the spoon standing in the ice cream and leaned back in the booth. The surprise on his face: priceless. Hey, I might have been homeless and had run away from my problems, but I wasn’t born yesterday. In fact, I came from a rich family, so I knew a thing or two about high-end tastes. What did he think – I was stupid? All that money oozing off his expensive slacks, crisp shirt, manicured hands, and a Bulgari watch had to come from somewhere.
“What, are you a mobster?” I asked jokingly.
He let out a nervous laugh, and the ice cream spoon slipped from my grip.
“Holy shit, you are, aren’t you? I was just kidding and taking a wild guess! I mean, of all the things to guess, I really don’t know why I would have said that. I shouldn’t have.” I was babbling, which had always been my number one skill, but getting out of one trouble tonight and into another one wasn’t my idea of a way forward. And mobsters were bad news - very bad news. What if he was looking for a hooker to join his brothel empire? What if he knew Dwayne, and would turn me over to him for a cash reward?
Shit!
“Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. I should leave.” I stood up with haste, but Axel grasped my wrist.
“Sit. I’m not a mobster. If it makes you feel any better, I’m in real estate. But I have to be honest with you: I can be easily linked to people you wouldn’t want to deal with.”
Slowly, I took my seat across from him again. I would have never pictured him as a sleazy real-estate agent. And why would a real estate agent need a gun? He did say he could be linked to slimy people… like Dwayne… Maybe getting more information out of him was a better idea than simply leaving.
“So, you’re selling Al Capone’s estate?”
“No.” He looked frustrated and confused. “You’ve got one heck of a smart mouth on you, did you know that?”
I knew. That same smart mouth had gotten me in trouble earlier today.
“I know. I’m sorry. It’s a defense mechanism. I’m not really a bitch, I promise.”
He laughed for a moment before composing his face again. “Seriously, Chloe. Do you have a place to stay?”
I shook my head, sighing. I knew there’d come a time when I’d have to open up to a stranger extending his hand to me, and Axel seemed like the most honest stranger I’d met in New York—which was saying a lot. Besides, he did save my life, so I sort of owed him the truth — some of it, at least.
“I left my family almost a month ago and came to New York. The city of dreams. Don’t ask me why. The simple reason is that I felt ashamed about what happened to me and needed a fresh start. I didn’t want to tarnish my parents’ name when the rumors started spreading. So I left before they even had a chance to begin. Except I didn’t expect life in New York to be this difficult. I wanted to find a job that matters, but potential employers don’t exactly favor someone in old jeans and a sweater who carries all of her belongings in a backpack. I guess I should have thought about my running away a bit more. Yeah, definitely not one of my brightest moments but I can’t go back. So for the past month, I’ve been trying to figure out life and my next step.”
“And what conclusion did you come to?”
“That I may not be able to do this on my own.”
“You can’t call your family?”
“It’s not that I can’t. It’s that I don’t want to. They’d take me back with open arms. Hell, they’d come here and drag my ass back down to… home. They’re a good family, but I’m not worthy of them. Not yet, at least. If my parents knew what I was about to do tonight, they’d be so disappointed. I don’t know what came over me, but I realize that jumping off that ledge was not really the best way to solve my problems. I think I pretty much hit the bottom without jumping.”
His face curved up in a smirk as if he knew exactly what I was talking about.
“Once a week, I sent… I send them postcards that I’m okay. My next one is due out tomorrow, but right now I don’t have enough money to buy myself a cup of tea, let alone send a postcard.” I looked up to meet his gaze. There was no pity in his eyes, as I’d feared; no I feel so sorry for you look, and that made me want to talk some more. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cry on your shoulder like that. It’s been a tough month, and I’m hoping someone can lend me a couple of bucks so that I can send the postcard so they’re not worried, and… why are you smiling?”
“Because I haven’t seen a postcard in years, never mind heard of anyone writing one any more. Everyone’s face is stuck in their phone. They’re busy texting, Instagramming, Snapchatting, and Skyping. What you’re doing is nice.”
What I did wasn’t nice; it was necessary. The last thing I wanted was for my family to lose sleep over me. They probably had, but it would pass — or so I hoped. Worse yet, I didn’t want them to think that I’d been kidnapped, and to send out a search party.
“Chloe, if there’s anything I want you to know about me, it’s that I don’t judge. We all have skeletons to deal with. Some are more fragile than others and some are stashed so deep in our closet that we don’t even know we have them until one day they come knocking on our door.”
I stirred the melting sundae in my cup, watching the swirls liquefy more after each turn.
“Thanks. I mean it.” I sighed, grateful t
hat he could see the real me, or at least acknowledge the possibility of the real me, underneath the raggedy clothes. “So, what’s up with the gun?”
“Honest truth?”
I nodded.
“It’s difficult to let go of the past. I have a feeling that’s something you understand.” He looked at me knowingly, and I nodded. “Before going out on my own, I worked for my father, who’s gained a reputation of being a money-laundering mobster with influence greater than the President. I won’t lie to you — it was an honest assessment. Since his illegal businesses were shut down, I’ve been transitioning into real estate. Some things are more difficult to let go of.” He pointed down to his leg where the gun was tucked away in a holster.
“You must be loaded,” I blurted.
Shit! That was rude. “Caveat, I don’t take responsibility for my mouth. It likes to say whatever it wants.”
“Ahh. Well, yes, I can’t say that money’s ever been an issue for me. Letting go of the past is still sometimes, though. I’m dangerous when I need to be, and oftentimes my temper gets the best of me, but since I’ve been concentrating on real estate, it’s become a little easier to deal with. Still, doesn’t change the fact that I’ve been in situations that not many have.”
Goosebumps covered my arms, but instead of looking over my shoulder, I reached forward and covered his hand, saying, “It couldn’t have been easy.” He looked down at our connection, then his gaze lifted to meet mine. I’d never seen a surprise-filled face from just a simple touch. It all appeared to happen in slow motion, and I yanked my hand back. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“It’s fine. It’s just that no one has ever touched me that way.”
“That’s impossible. Women must be all over you all the time.”
“They are, but how do I know they’re worthy?”
“You mean gold diggers?”
“They say that the best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”
“Hemingway.” It was my turn to be apprehensive, but Axel spoke with passion I’d never heard from a man’s mouth.
“What?”
“You just quoted Ernest Hemingway.”
“I didn’t know that, but you keep on amplifying my interest. Your touch was sensual, not intended to just seduce me for a fuck. That’s what I meant. You have hope.”
I lowered my hand to my stomach underneath the table to where I thought that hope was growing inside of me.
I didn’t think I would really have jumped. Killing myself was one thing, but killing someone else… I just didn’t have it in me.
As I got lost in my thoughts, Axel raised his hand to the waitress for our bill. The burgers we’d had before we hit the dessert were settling nicely in my empty stomach and I hoped they’d keep me energized for a couple of days before I figured out what to do next.
“What made you choose New York?” he asked.
“What better place to hide in than among eight million other people?”
“Okay, so what are your skills? What can you do? If you know Hemingway quotes by heart, you must be educated. I know a lot of people, and I can definitely help in the job finding department. Unless you’re one of those girls who studied philosophy, because I don’t know any philosophers.”
Really? Well, someone must have donated a bushel of four-leafed clovers to the Leprechaun Academy in my name. Should I take him up on the offer? I hadn’t had any luck finding a job myself, and I didn’t have much time to figure out life on my own.
“I studied interior design.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“No.”
“Exactly the person I was looking for.”
His excitement was over the top as he removed a few bills from his wallet and handed them to the waitress.
“You’re just trying to be nice.”
“Didn’t I tell you that I’m in real estate?”
He did. Was he insinuating that we could work together?
“Listen, why don’t we meet at my office first thing Monday morning? Actually scratch that. There’s no better way to check out your skills than having you doing a job for me.”
“What?”
“You do want a job, don’t you?”
“Yes, but I—”
“Just listen until I’m done.” He removed a piece of paper and wrote down an address, after which he took out a credit card and passed both items to me. “This is one of my new acquisitions. The suites are supposed to be rented furnished. If you can do the penthouse within three days, and I like it, I’ll let you furnish and decorate the rest of the building.”
Everything was happening so quickly that for a moment I thought I was dreaming. After he confirmed his request with a nod, I asked, “What’s my budget?”
“No budget. I want to see what you can do at a cost that you think is reasonable for the area.”
Holy shit! He was offering me a dream job. Axel Wagner wasn’t just an angel, he was my personal lucky charm with sprinkles on top. Maybe I had jumped off that balcony and gone to heaven?
“Can you do it?” he asked, bringing me out of my daze.
“Yeah, I think so, but—”
“I’m not done. Use the card to rent a place for yourself as well. Preferably in one of my buildings. I’ll email you the list—”
“Email?”
“Shit, I’m sorry. I should have known better. You know what?” He looked across the street to the hotel, removed his phone, and started tapping. After what seemed like forever he smiled, “You have a room in that hotel, paid for, for as long as you need before moving to an apartment in one of my buildings. I’ll send someone with a new phone, laptop, and suggestions of stores and boutiques in the morning.”
“Axel, why are you doing this? I’m a nobody.”
He leaned in closer and reached forward to my lip, wiping away the excess cream off my mouth. The rest of my sundae melted from the mere heat radiating off my body from my excitement.
“That’s not who I see sitting across from me. And I need a change as well. This will keep me focused on my new life.”
“So, I’m a project to you?”
“Yes. No, I mean, no. You’re not a project. You’re just the perfect distraction I need to continue on the right path.” He leaned in again and whispered, “Away from the mafia.”
Distraction.
Well, in my book a distraction was much better than homeless, or a flat pancake on a concrete sidewalk.
“Thank you. I don’t know what else to say. I’ll pay you back all the money—”
“Don’t even mention it. Deliver on the furnishings the way I need them, and I’ll be more than happy. Believe me, you’re the one doing me a favor here.”
I doubted that, but I also knew there was no way in hell I’d get a better offer than his — ever.
Axel walked me across the street to the hotel, and all the way up to my room.
“I guess this is good night?”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
It didn’t look like either one of us wanted to part ways. Looking deep into his eyes, I felt my stomach flip. He leaned in for a kiss on a cheek, but I extended my hand for a shake instead. If I would be working for him, I’d need to be professional. If this guy was all that he appeared to be, then I had to be on my best behavior, no matter how attractive I thought he was.
When he took my hand, I didn’t expect him to lift it to his lips… and kiss it.
“This evening has been exhilarating, Chloe. I’m glad you didn’t jump.”
“Thank you, Axel. For everything.” I pushed the door open and stepped inside the hotel room. Before I closed the door, I looked back and called out as he neared the elevator. “Hey, Axel? I’m glad I didn’t jump too.”
Chapter 5
I woke up to the sun hitting my eyes. The past night of sleep, although I didn’t quite remember how quickly I’d passed out, was the best one I’d had in a long time. I still couldn’t believe how wonderful
it felt to sleep for longer than an hour without having to wake up, fearing someone would stab me, rape me, or mug me. Not to mention the fresh high-thread count sheets, soft mattress, and firm pillow that had made this night perfect.
I checked my back pocket for the last three pills from the doctor at the free clinic, got up, and swallowed one with a handful of tap water. When I lifted my head, that’s when I noticed the exquisite suite I was staying in. The night before, when I’d removed my sneakers, tired from a month-long homelessness and not knowing what I’d eat, where I’d sleep, and what I’d wear, I’d plopped directly down on the bed and crashed.
I hadn’t slept that hard since leaving my loving hometown of Franklin in West Virginia. Yes, despite living like a bum the past three weeks, lost in my sorrows, guilt, and shame, I had a loving home. One with a mother from whom I got my designing skills, a father who was a well-established lawyer, a butler who was almost like an uncle, and a sister whom I missed the most of all. I would never forgive myself for leaving the way I did, making her feel guilty, but hopefully she could forgive me one day. I wasn’t sure when that day would arrive, because I wasn’t ready yet, but it would. And when it did, I’d do anything in my power to win her trust again. I just had to get away and had to do it fast, before Jack decided to find me and do more damage to my body, so I’d grabbed a backpack, filled it with necessities, and bolted out the door in the middle of the night.
I stretched my arms out to the sides. Right now I had work to do, but holy shit, was this place ever huge. I paced out of the bathroom, back into the bedroom, and then out of the bedroom to the living area. The design was modern, sleek, and clean, with neutral colors. If my assessment was correct, way expensive and way out of my budget.
My gaze caught the rack of clothes by the wall. It had been so dark last night, I hadn’t even noticed it. I picked up the note off a table beside it, reading aloud, “Figured you’d like to change into something more comfortable to go shopping. Axel.”