Leaving Mother Lake
Page 27
More than a year has passed, and I have now read the final manuscript. I was not prepared for this story of my youth, to see so much of myself in those English words, filtered through another’s imagination. Yet this is me, who I was and who I am, and it is a beautiful, sad, and hopeful story. It is very hard for me to take in so much emotion. I couldn’t leave the manuscript in Geneva, where I first received it; I took it with me to Italy and then to Beijing, and now I am here in Lake Lugu, where I have come to visit my mother, to spend three weeks in my village. This is my longest visit since I ran away in anger so many years ago. I am sitting by the fireplace on the mud floor of the kitchen, looking over the manuscript again. The wood is too wet from last night’s rain and smoke is filling the room, giving me a perfect excuse to let the tears flood my burning eyes and roll down my face. I have always found it so hard, almost impossible, to cry, but now it seems that I cannot stop!
Through the window I can see my mother feeding the pig, caressing her gently. The old lady’s face is sweet and tender. There is an aura of warmth around my mother. She is finally in harmony, I tell myself, and as if she could hear my thoughts, she turns and looks over her shoulder. Her eyes meet mine and she smiles. It is as if I were hit by a ball of fire. I smile back, and the tears fall on yet another page of my life.
It has long been clear to me that my past is what makes my present. Always an outsider, always different, I hope my story can contribute something of importance to anyone who has felt different, and that I may be an ambassador for my people and give them the pride and confidence they deserve.
NamuLake LuguNovember 2001
AUTHORS’ ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
We wish to extend our warmest thanks to our agent, Richard Balkin, and our editor at Little, Brown, Deborah Baker, for the enthusiasm, hard work, and encouragement that made this adventure possible. We also give very special thanks to Eileen Walsh for her support, to Thoralf Stenvold for all his patient support and dedication. And we thank Peter Shotwell, Sandra Steele, Cassis Lumb, Harley Blakeman, and Lisa Cody for their comments on the work in progress; and Paola Zuin and Matt Forney for relaying messages between San Francisco, Geneva, and Beijing.
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
Yang Erche Namu was born in the year of the horse (1966) in Zuosuo village by Lake Lugu. At the age of eight, she was sent to live with her maternal uncle and herd yaks in the mountains. She did not return to live in the village again until she was about thirteen years old, entirely illiterate, yet ready to undergo initiation as an adult woman. In 1981 she left her mountain home for the first time to partake in a series of singing contests sponsored by the provincial Cultural Bureau, which led all the way to Beijing and the discovery of her talent. A few months after returning home, she ran away from her village and joined the Liangshan Minority Singing and Dancing Troupe in Xichang, Sichuan province. The following year she was accepted in a special minority program at the Shanghai Music Conservatory, where she not only studied singing but also learned to read and write. After graduation she joined the China Minority Singing and Dancing Ensemble in Beijing. In 1990 she left to reside in San Francisco for several years. When she returned to China in the mid-1990s, Namu had lost all her hearing in one ear and was forced to abandon singing professionally. She then pursued a career in modeling, which took her to Italy, Japan, Hong Kong, and the United States. In 1999, she won Cosmopolitan magazine’s first annual fashion award in Beijing. Over the past ten years, Namu has published several books in China about her life and career, including a book coauthored with Moso scholar Lamu Gatusa. Today she lives with Norwegian diplomat Thoralf Stenvold and divides her time among Geneva, Beijing, and San Francisco.
Christine Mathieu was born in Paris, France, in 1954 (another horse year). When she was sixteen, she went to live in England and from there emigrated to Australia, where she studied anthropology. After graduating, she pursued various interests and a career in teaching. In 1989, she began doctoral research in the comparative histories, customs, and cultures of the Moso and Naxi peoples of Yunnan province. There she met Moso academician Lamu Gatusa and through him Namu. Christine is married with two children and lives in San Francisco. She teaches anthropology at Saint Mary’s College of California.
*In the 1950s, the People’s Republic of China counted fifty-five official nationalities, among which the Han made up 93 percent of the total population. In 1978, however, the Jino were added to the list of Chinese national groups. Thus, today, China has fifty-six nationalities, of which fifty-five are also known as minority nationalities. (back to text)