‘And what if he just decides to stop playing? He wouldn’t be the first player to act like a spoilt child just because they couldn’t get their own way.’
‘Amber, baby, we are getting married tomorrow. Tomorrow. That’s what I want to be focusing on now, not Ryan Fisher. In less than two hours he ceases to be my problem…’
‘Professionally. He ceases to be your problem professionally.’
‘He ceases to be our problem, Amber. So let’s just concentrate on us, okay? And whatever he decides to do, we’ll handle it. Together.’
She smiled, and he wished with all his heart that he could promise her it would be easy. So it was just as well she didn’t listen to his promises.
‘Together,’ she whispered.
‘Together.’ He smiled, and be breathed an inner sigh of relief as her smile grew wider. She was his beautiful girl, his life. She was his world, a world he wasn’t about to let Ryan Fisher invade. ‘I love you, Amber. So much, you have no idea…’
She reached out to touch his cheek, running her fingers lightly over it, her eyes locking with his. ‘I love you, too, Jim.’
He pulled her closer, needing to feel her body against his, to feel her warmth, to hold her one more time in the place where this whole journey had kicked off a second time. A place they were leaving behind. A place they needed to leave behind. And as her lips touched his, her fingers fanning out across the back of his neck, pushing him down onto her, he knew he was doing the right thing. Because he was doing it for them. For their future. And that was all that mattered.
*
‘Well, I have to say, if that was you showing the footballing world what you’re capable of when you’re playing at your best they’re gonna be falling over themselves to get your signature on a contract.’
Ryan grinned at Max as they celebrated Newcastle Red Star’s 5-2 win over Midlands club Glendale Rovers. Four of those goals had come from Ryan himself, the fifth one coming from a penalty gained when an overzealous Glendale defender had floored Ryan as he’d headed towards an almost open goal. ‘I’ve got to get my transfer request finalised first, though. Jim Allen rejected it.’
‘Oh, Jesus, Ryan, what are you doing aggravating Jim today?’
‘Who’s aggravating anyone? At the time I asked him he was still my boss.’
‘And you knew that mentioning any transfer request to a London club was going to aggravate him. Are you really so stupid that you feel the need to wind people up? People you really should avoid upsetting.’
‘Why, huh? Why, Max? Finding out he’s going to be bringing up my son with the woman I’m still…’ He stopped, but he didn’t miss the look Max gave him.
‘I thought you said you weren’t in love with her any more.’
‘So I lied. Come on, Max. Only weeks ago I thought me and Amber had a chance, y’know? We had Rico, we’d been happy for weeks, and I was certain…’ He leaned back against the wall, pushing a hand through his hair. ‘He’ll hurt her again, Max. I know he will.’
‘They’re going to Vegas.’
Ryan looked at Max, frowning slightly. ‘Vegas?’
‘Yes. And they’ve only told a handful of people because it’s all very hush-hush until they get back home, but I’m telling you now because I think you need a reality check.’
‘Why… why would I…?’
‘Why do people usually run off to Vegas in secret, Ryan?’ Max watched as the penny slowly dropped, Ryan’s expression changing within seconds.
‘Why is she rushing into it, Max?’
‘Because she loves him. She loves him like she could never love you, and I’m not saying that to be cruel, I’m saying it because I care about you. More than you’ll ever know, kiddo.’
Ryan stared down at his boots, his stomach lurching, a sickening feeling taking over.
‘You keep this to yourself, Ryan, do you hear? It really wouldn’t be wise if you were the one named as leaking this news.’
‘I’m not gonna say anything,’ Ryan said quietly, looking up at Max. ‘But I think she’s making a mistake.’
‘And I’d be lying if I said you were the only person to think that. But you’ve got to let her go, Ryan. She’ll do what she has to do, and you need to move on with your life. You’ve got that little one to think about now.’ Max eyed Ryan carefully, trying to read his expression as he looked around the room. There was no doubt he was looking for Amber, and Max hoped he didn’t find her. Not this afternoon, not after what he’d just told him. Maybe it would be better if Ryan and Amber didn’t see each other again until after she returned from Vegas, but given their parental situation Max feared things weren’t going to be that simple. ‘You gonna be okay?’
Ryan’s head shot round. ‘I’m not a child, Max.’
Max just hoped he remembered that when it came to following through any actions he might be thinking of taking. ‘Okay. I’ll see you later.’
‘Yeah,’ Ryan mumbled, his eyes back scanning the room. ‘Later.’ His mind was on other things now. And he wasn’t going to settle until he’d talked to her.
*
‘I am so happy you and Hayley are hitting it off,’ Amber sighed, squeezing Ronnie’s hand as they shared a post-match drink at the bar in the Players’ Lounge, which was the busiest she’d seen it in a long, long time thanks to an impromptu farewell party that had started up for Jim. ‘She’ll be good for you. And you look gorgeous together.’
Ronnie had recently started dating another Cloud Sports reporter, Hayley Samson, and from what Amber could gather, things were going better than okay. And even though Hayley was a good friend of Amber’s she hadn’t even had to set them up. They’d got together all by themselves after a night in the Cloud Sports bar following an evening stint presenting Scoreline together.
Hayley had joined the Cloud Sports team a few months after Amber, and they’d hit it off immediately. Both were northern girls, both were daughters of ex-professional football players, and both of them loved the sport. Amber couldn’t be happier for Ronnie. Hayley made him smile, and seeing Ronnie smile made Amber happy; it was as simple as that.
‘Yeah. She’s a great girl.’ Ronnie looked at Amber, a slow grin spreading across his face. ‘And she’s fucking hot!’
‘I never had you down as the shallow type, Ronnie White.’ Amber tried to look shocked, but she was only messing. Hayley was pretty hot with her long auburn hair and big brown eyes, but she was also one very savvy young woman. She didn’t take any crap, and that’s what Amber liked about her. She reminded her of herself, before she’d let Jim Allen back into her life. Before she’d allowed Ryan Fisher into her world. Before she’d let those two men change her.
‘What’s up?’ Ronnie asked, noticing Amber’s expression, her eyes now down on the floor.
‘Nothing,’ she sighed, pushing a hand through her hair.
‘Okay… now do you want to tell me the truth?’
‘There’s nothing up, Ronnie. I was just thinking, that’s all. About everything that’s happened. Everything that’s taken me up to this point.’
‘And?’ He was looking at her with eyes that told her he wasn’t going to go away until she’d told him something that convinced him she was absolutely fine about everything that was going on.
‘And it’s just, it’s unsettling, that’s all. The way I’ve…’ She leaned back against the bar, staring out ahead of her, watching as Jim moved around the room, saying his goodbyes, talking to the players and board members and staff he was leaving behind. She remembered the day she’d heard he was coming back here, to Newcastle Red Star. The way her stomach had dipped so low she’d almost been physically sick. The way her heart had broken all over again as a million memories had flooded into her head. How she’d known she was going to fall in love with him all over again – because she’d never really fallen out. So she should have been prepared for everything that had followed, but instead she’d handled it all so badly. ‘You were right, Ronnie. I’ve changed. And I don’t alway
s like the person I’ve become – this weak woman who’s let one man rule her life for so long.’
‘So, do something about it.’
She looked at him, right into his eyes. ‘I can’t,’ she whispered, her shoulders sagging in an almost resigned way. ‘I can’t.’
‘Can’t, or won’t?’ Ronnie held her gaze.
Amber shook her head. ‘If I walk away from him now, I fall apart. It’s as simple as that. I walk away from him and I fall apart. Because, despite everything, I am so in love with that man I’ve lost all sense of reality. He walks out of a room and I can’t breathe. When he touches me everything feels better, everything feels right, and he’s different now, you have no idea…’ She trailed off, breaking the stare to look over at Jim again. He was laughing, talking to one of the American owners of the club, the beautiful smile lighting up his handsome, handsome face, and she felt her world flip upside down as she watched him. ‘He touches me and I don’t even want to be that person I used to be any more,’ she whispered, her eyes not leaving Jim as he continued to move around the room. ‘Even though I know…’ She finally turned to look back at Ronnie. ‘Even though I know I need to be her again. I need to be that woman I used to be.’
‘Then do something about it, Amber. Before it’s too late.’
She shook her head again, her eyes back on Jim, and she found herself smiling as he turned around, his eyes meeting hers. That switch had been flicked. And there was no returning to normal now. ‘It’s already too late,’ she said, her voice so quiet it was barely a whisper. ‘It’s already far too late.’
*
‘I can’t believe you’re doing this, Dad.’
Jim looked at his son. ‘How’s that injury?’
Brandon was out of action for a couple of games after an incident on the training pitch over Christmas had done some minimal damage to a tendon in his foot, which was why he’d been able to come to Tynebridge to see his father’s final game with Newcastle Red Star. He was heading off to join the rest of the Wearside Spartans squad for their match in Hull later that evening. He wouldn’t be playing, but he still wanted to be a part of the team and watch from the bench.
‘It’s fine. I’m back on light training and you’re changing the subject.’
‘I’m not getting into it, Brandon. Everyone knows my reasons for going back to Endleigh, and anyway, I thought you were happy Amber and I are back together.’
‘Of course I’m happy you’re back together, that isn’t the… Dad, I came here, to Wearside Spartans, because you were based in the north-east. I came here to be closer to you, and now you’re moving away…’
‘Brandon, I’m moving a few hundred miles down the motorway. That’s all. And you know why I need to do this. You know that.’
‘I know, I do, and I understand, it’s just that… Jesus! I’m gonna miss you, that’s all.’
Jim pulled his son in for a hug, holding him tight. ‘And I’m gonna miss you, kiddo. But you’re gonna be just fine, you hear me?’ He pulled away slightly, looking Brandon in the eye, smiling at his handsome boy. ‘You are one extremely talented young man, Brandon Palmer. You’ve got your whole soccer career in front of you, and who knows where that career is going to take you? For the time being, you just know that Wearside Spartans is the place you need to be right now. Since you’ve been there I have never seen you play better, and believe me, I know talent when I see it. I’m not just saying that because you’re my son, trust me.’
Brandon smiled, his attention distracted only slightly as he saw Ellen walk into the room, looking pretty and perky in her match-day work outfit of tight black pencil skirt and sexy white shirt, her heels high, accentuating those incredible legs of hers.
‘I’m proud of you, Brandon. Never forget that.’
He looked at Jim, trying to ignore the fact Ellen had made a beeline for Ryan Fisher. ‘I know you are, Dad. Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put a downer on your move to Endleigh. This is a great opportunity for you, to go back there. They’re one of the biggest clubs in the world and… and I’m happy for you. Happy that you’ve got this amazing job, happy that you’re marrying Amber again. Just try to make sure you stay married to her this time, okay?’
Jim couldn’t help smiling at that. ‘Yeah. I’ll do my best, son. And remember, keep that information to yourself for now, okay?’
‘You got it.’ Brandon grinned, hugging his dad one more time. ‘I love you, Dad.’
‘Yeah, I love you, too, kiddo. I’d better go say some more goodbyes, okay? I’ll call you soon. And you take care of that injury, you hear me?’
Brandon nodded, his attention now focused fully on Ellen as he watched her sidle up to Ryan Fisher. He watched as she tried to be as discreet as she possibly could, but she wasn’t very clever at hiding her body language. Brandon may be young – and he was a good few years younger than Ellen – but he wasn’t stupid. He could see exactly what was going on.
Narrowing his eyes slightly he continued to stare at her, at the way her fingers trailed over Ryan’s arm, and the fact Ryan didn’t pull away. In fact, as Brandon looked harder, he could see Ryan’s hand fall quickly onto her bottom, and Ellen giggled, forgetting herself for a second as she leaned in towards him. And it was then that, for some reason, she turned her head, her eyes meeting Brandon’s from across the room, the expression on her face sealing it for him.
He turned around and walked away. He was done here. He had another match to get to.
*
‘Amber, can I have a quick word?’
She stopped in her tracks, turning to look at Max. ‘Yeah. Of course you can. What’s up?’
‘I’ve told Ryan.’
She frowned. ‘You’ve told him what?’ Then she realised. ‘Oh, Jesus, Max! I specifically asked you to keep that quiet. What the hell did you tell him for? I really don’t need this…’
‘He’s Rico’s dad, Amber.’
‘And that does not give him the right to know every single fucking move I make. I can’t believe you told him.’
‘Look, he’s living in some kind of parallel universe where he’s under the impression that you and him might have some chance of getting back together. I just thought he needed a reality check.’
She widened her eyes as she stared at him. ‘What? And you thought telling him I was marrying Jim, in Vegas, in the next couple of days; you thought that was the best way to do that, did you? Jesus, Max. I thought you were the intelligent one amongst us.’
‘I’m sorry. In hindsight maybe I was wrong.’
‘You think?’
‘I’m worried about him, Amber.’
‘I can’t do this now, Max, I really can’t. I am done with caring about what state he’s going to get himself into or how he’s going to deal with any little problem that might come his way. He told me that since Rico’s arrival he’s grown up, he’s changed, and I have to believe that he’s adult enough to actually mean that, because I am done with worrying about him. I can’t do it any more. It’s draining and exhausting and it takes up too much of my time. Time I want to spend with Jim. And Rico. So if you think he’s on the verge of doing something stupid then stop him, okay? Stop him. Because I can’t. I can’t, Max.’
‘Amber…’
‘No, Max.’ She started to walk away from him, then stopped, turning back around to face him. ‘Just make sure he doesn’t say anything. About Jim and I going to Vegas. Please.’
She began pushing her way through the crowded Players’ Lounge, suddenly needing some fresh air. All she’d wanted to do was escape from this place and go somewhere far away, just for a few days, somewhere where all the complications and the problems that just wouldn’t seem to disappear couldn’t touch them. But they still kept piling up, filling her head with crap she didn’t want to have to deal with yet.
Stepping outside into the bright winter sunshine, she leaned back against the wall, closing her eyes and wishing, just briefly, that she hadn’t stopped smoking. Because she could cer
tainly do with a cigarette right now.
‘Want some company?’
‘No, Ryan, I don’t.’ She opened her eyes, but she didn’t look at him. ‘And before you start pretending you don’t know, Max told me. He told me that he told you about Jim and me getting married.’
‘Why are you doing it so soon?’ Ryan didn’t miss a beat.
‘Because I love him.’
‘As simple as that, huh?’
She turned her head to look at him. ‘As simple as that.’
‘You’re making a mistake.’
‘I didn’t ask for your opinion.’
‘I’m giving it to you anyway.’
‘You have no right…’
‘No, Amber, I have every right. That man is going to be bringing up my child…’
‘Oh, for Christ’s sake. He is a good man, Ryan. He’s made mistakes, but he’s changed and he isn’t that person any more.’
Ryan laughed, he couldn’t help it.
Amber stared at him. ‘Excuse me…?’
‘Have you heard yourself, Amber? You’re making him sound like a fucking saint. Jesus, the man almost destroyed you! Have you forgotten what he put you through last year? Have you? I saw the state you were in, I was there; I watched you break down. I held you when you cried and I wanted to kill him for doing that to you. For making you so unhappy. Do you remember that, huh? Do you remember the things you told me, the way you just fell apart, because he ripped you in fucking two, Amber. He did that to you, and you stand here and you tell me he’s a good man?’
‘Don’t do this, Ryan. Don’t.’
‘He’ll hurt you again, and I don’t know when and I don’t know how but he will hurt you, again, and even though I want to tell you… even though I really want to say don’t come running to me when he does, it’s the only place I want you to come running. I want you to run to me. Because I love you, and I care about you…’
She held up her hands, her head down as she willed him to stop talking. To just stop.
Final Score Page 16