by H. D. Gordon
A couple hours later, after the rest of the urgent business had been concluded, and she was finally crawling into her bed, unable to sleep on her back because of the pain in her backside, she was so confused by everything that was going on that all she could do was cry herself into some much needed sleep.
Chapter 39
Kayla
Fae Harper wasn’t the only one experiencing an abundance of confusing emotions. Kayla was also feeling unease, to say the least. She had witnessed other members of the church being punished from time to time, but what was happening to Fae at the moment was beyond any of what Kayla had seen. Watching her friend have her pants and underwear yanked down, and then be bent over a coffee table to be beaten with a wooden paddle was…obscene. No, if she was being completely honest, it was grotesque and horrifying. And it scared Kayla more than she was willing to admit.
And yet, when Father called upon her to address Fae by the name that he said she’d earned, Kayla didn’t hesitate to jump in and call Fae a whore. Later, when Kayla was back in her room, searching for sleep she needed but knew wouldn’t come, she would feel guilty over her behavior, and would chalk it up to several things.
For one thing, Kayla’s biological father—who was dead now for five years, and good riddance—had cheated on her mother with a home-wreaking whore and had basically ruined her childhood. So, instead of hating her father forever, Kayla Carter had always harbored a certain passionate hatred for any woman who would knowingly pursue a married man. Especially a married man with children, like the reverend. (Never mind the fact that Kayla had been fantasizing about the reverend herself just yesterday.) Given her experience, she couldn’t think of anything a woman could do that was more selfish or vile. After Kayla had found out about her father’s mistress, she had on many nights lain awake in her bed, thinking of all the horrible things she wished would befall the nasty bitch who had been sleeping with her father behind her mother’s back.
A terrible car accident. A piano falling from a window the whore just happened to be passing beneath. A case of terminal cancer that would rapidly eat her away from the inside out…A wooden paddle and public humiliation.
When Kayla thought about it like that, it seemed to her that Fae was getting off easy. Also, if she really had thrown herself at Father,—which, Kayla was sure he would have no reason to lie about—then perhaps she did deserve what she was getting. Yes, of course she did. Father was a good man. He only wanted what was best for Fae, and he had enough on his plate with all the good work he did that he didn’t need some little whore throwing herself at him in that way. It wasn’t fair to him at all.
But it was more than that. It was the fact that Kayla knew she’d been called to this meeting for a reason, and that reason was Joe. Joe being here was a big problem, because Father and the rest of the Family were already suspicious because of how crazy her brother, Kyle, had been behaving. Also, what Joe had whispered to her earlier before Fae had interrupted them was weighing on her mind heavily.
“I s-s-saw something. Kuh-Kayla, I-I-I saw something buh-buh-bad.”
“That’s enough, Dorie, darling,” Father said, pulling Kayla out of her thoughts. “Fae is not the only one that has been bad.”
Kayla’s throat went dry as she looked up now to see Father staring at her with those dark eyes she’d always found so alluring, but was now all but cowering under. She had a fleeting thought then that her witnessing Fae’s punishment was no coincidence, but instead maybe…purposeful. A thinly veiled message, or better yet, a warning.
“Kayla,” Father said, speaking softly and gently, the way a patient parent who already knows the answers to their questions will. “I’m only going to ask you this one time, my dear, and I can only hope you won’t lie. Though I may live here, I will remind you that this is still a house of God.”
Kayla’s heart was beating out of her chest, but she nodded, because she had no idea what else to do.
A kind smile spread across Father’s face. “Did your friend Joe really come here by coincidence, or is it possible she’s a spy sent in by your troublesome brother to try and lure you away from us?”
Again, Joe’s words flashed through her head. I saw something. Kayla, I saw something bad…
She opened her mouth to answer, but found she had to swallow twice before she could get the words to come out. “Not that I know of,” she said, hoping her voice didn’t sound as weak and guilty to them as it did to her own ears.
Father sat back in his chair, his eyes never leaving her. “Not that you know of,” he repeated. “But it’s possible? It’s possible she’s only here to cause more trouble?”
Again, Kayla found herself floundering for an answer. “I…I don’t think so, Father,” she said, not sure who exactly she was protecting; herself, or Joe. “Joe has had a hard life,” she added, when he just sat staring at her. “Honestly, it’s a wonder she didn’t seek the Lord before now.”
“So she’s never shown any interest in God until recently?” he pressed.
Kayla could feel herself starting to panic, and took a deep breath to calm herself. “I guess so,” she answered, inwardly cringing at that lame response. She couldn’t seem to think straight when Father was staring at her like that.
“You guess so,” he said, repeating her again. “I guess we will just have to keep a close eye on you two then, since all you can do is ‘guess so’. Tell me, child, is there anything else I should know about our newest resident? Anything important about Joe that I would find interesting?”
Kayla’s response was immediate this time. She may be on the spot and flustered at the moment, but she’d been keeping Joe’s biggest secret for years, and whether it was the fact that this was so ingrained in her, or she consciously was protecting one of her oldest friends, didn’t really matter.
“No, Father,” Kayla said. “There’s nothing special about her. She’s pretty average all the way around.”
Father’s eyes flicked to Fae, who was laying on her side on the floor next to Kayla, probably because her backside was in too much pain from the paddling to sit up. His eyes lingered on Fae for a moment, and then his dark gaze settled on Kayla again.
“You’re not lying to me, are you, Kayla?” he asked, his fingers stretching out and brushing a piece of hair off of her forehead. “You wouldn’t do that, my child…would you?”
Kayla shook her head. “No, Father,” she said. “I wouldn’t do that.”
He bent forward now and placed a wet kiss on the top of her head, but a sick feeling settled in her stomach. “Good,” he said. “That’s very good.”
Chapter 40
Middle Man
“I’m worried, Father,” Dorie said, finally stopping her nervous pacing and coming to kneel before him now. “This is not good.”
An image of him backhanding the shit out of her for speaking aloud the stupidly obvious flashed through his head. He saw her neck snapping to the side as his knuckles connected with her face, and even heard the unmistakable sound of a hard slap in his ears. The image made a smile pull up his lips, and he leaned forward in his chair now to take her hands into his. She scooted forward on her knees to accept him, and her hands were cold. Dorie Dunham’s hands were always cold.
“You’re right,” he said. “This is bad, but we need to keep our heads about us, dear. Now, did you find the reporter yet? If you’ve taken care of that little bitch, this might not be as bad as we think.”
Even before he finished asking the question, he could see Dorie’s answer on her face. “No, we weren’t able to get to her yet. Bobby and I went to her apartment and she wasn’t there. Bobby’s still there right now, staking the place out. He’s supposed to call if she returns.”
He hardly heard any of what she said, all he knew was that stupid little bitch Beth had left the ranch, and there was currently a reporter they couldn’t find that was investigating him. He could feel the anger building in him, and knew he would need to return to The Closet this evening before be
d; if he ever got to go to bed. On days like these his work seemed endless.
“Father,” Dorie said, squeezing his hands and staring up at him with concern all over her face. “What if Beth and the reporter—”
Now he did backhand the shit out of her. His arm seemed to swing back on its own, and his hand connected hard with Dorie’s cheek, making her head snap back, making that unmistakable sound, only this time it was mingled with a small cry of pain. It happened so quickly he couldn’t have stopped it if he wanted to.
Feeling a bit calmer, he sat back in his chair now and stared at Dorie with narrowed eyes. To her credit, there were no tears streaming down her cheeks, even though he’d struck her hard enough that the majority of the left side of her face was already swelling and red. Of all his soldiers, Dorie was among the toughest, and he admired her for that.
He didn’t apologize for his assault. Instead, he said, “We need to find both Beth Johnson and Sara Ross as soon as possible, and we need to make sure they don’t fuck with us. Can I trust you to do that, Dorie?”
Dorie nodded.
“Good. You said Bobby is waiting at Ross’ apartment, right? That’s also good. Make sure he doesn’t leave there until he gets a sight on her. She’s got to return home eventually. If Bobby needs help, have Ron Jr. go with him. It’s time that boy started pulling more weight.” He paused and rubbed his chin. “Beth,” he spat her name like it was poison, “that stupid little bitch. They must be together. How else would Ross know we were coming for her, unless Beth warned her?”
Dorie shook her head. “That’s what I thought at first too,” she said. “But when I ran through the time frame in my head, that doesn’t make sense. Ross was here at noon, and so was Beth, but I never left them alone together. I was watching Anna, really, because she was the one who’d needed to be punished the night before, but Beth had witnessed Anna’s punishment, so I knew I needed to keep an eye on her, too. I was careful not to leave either of them alone with Ross, not even for a second, so she couldn’t have warned her then.”
She paused, and he waved his hand impatiently, telling her to get on with it.
“Bobby and I went to Ross’ apartment around four o’ clock, waiting to catch her when she returned,” Dorie said. “I’ve been having Bobby watch Ross for the past few days, like you wanted, and he said she always returns to her apartment at around four-thirty, but today she never did.” She stifled a yawn and checked her watch. “Or yesterday now, I guess. Anyway, based on time sheets and several people who can attest to Beth having been at her chore stations until five-forty-five, I don’t think it was Beth who warned Ross. Ross knew well before then. Beth was here until about six. Not until I was taking attendance at the dinner did I notice her missing.”
His anger was building again. Not at Dorie in particular, just at the entire situation. “And it’s not possible Beth called Ross somehow earlier in the day?” he asked.
Dorie shook her head. “I don’t think so. None of the residents have access to phones aside from Sharon, Bobby, Ron Jr, Fae and me. Plus your cell phone, the one in your office, and the one in your bedroom. I asked Ron Jr. if it was possible someone had snuck into your office or upstairs in the past twenty-four hours, and he said no. He’s been on security detail, and he knows how important guarding the house is—especially in these trying times. On top of that, why would Beth risk breaking in here just to warn Ross.” She shook her head again. “No, I don’t think it was Beth that warned her. Beth may have sought Ross out afterward, but the warning came from someone else.”
His jaw was clenched tight enough now to give him a headache. He felt it beginning to throb at his temples, and he wiped at his dry mouth with the back of his hand. “Who, then, Dorie?” he asked. “Who is the traitor in our midst?”
Dorie stood up, backing away from him. She really was a smart girl. “I will find out, Father,” she said. “You have my word.”
He gave a slow nod. “Before you go, did you get that stuff I told you to get? The special…ingredient I requested?”
“Yes,” she said. “It came in yesterday. I put it in the basement, in the locker where we keep the guns.”
Satisfied, he sent Dorie on her way after that. Once she was gone, he went to his office and locked the door behind him. He sat down at his desk and unlocked the drawer where he kept his white powder. He laid out a line of the stuff, plugged his right nostril with his thumb, and sucked the cocaine up in one clean swoop. The drugs rushed to his head and he sat back, closing his eyes, feeling the first bit of relaxation he’d felt all day.
A few blissful moments later, he stood and went over to The Closet. He unlocked the door and stepped inside. The smells of old blood and disinfectant comforted him. Along with the white stuff, The Closet seemed to be the only thing that could comfort him anymore. The devil was near, maybe lurking in his own home, trying to rip control from his fingers. It certainly wouldn’t be the first time.
He lit the candles that were set up and grabbed the instrument from its hook on the wall, bringing its torn leather strips up to his nose and inhaling deeply. Then he set to his task, kneeling on the little red rug and swinging the instrument over his shoulder so that the tough leather strips struck his scarred back hard enough to draw blood.
He struck himself again. And again. And as they always did, all the things he didn’t want to think about came flooding back. All the names they had called him. Freak. Weirdo. Misfit. The foul breath of his drunkard father as he told him not to enter his house again if he couldn’t get rid of his “faggot” tendencies. The betrayal from the children he’d thought were his friends. The dirty whores who had rejected him. All of it. All of the injustices of the world. All on his shoulders. Forever.
When he was done, he felt better. Though it was never pleasant to think about the past, rehashing it somehow made him feel stronger, more in control. He had been tested and underestimated before, and he had always come out on top. If that stupid little bitch Beth had run off to talk to Ross, she could just count her fucking days, and so could Ross. If there was anyone who could track the two cunts down, it was Dorie and Bobby. Those two were damn good little soldiers. No, they were the best.
And he would find out who the traitor was. The vile rat could not hide from him forever. He was sure of that.
But if all else failed, there was always Plan B.
PART III: THE ROAD TO NOWHERE
Chapter 41
Joe
When I woke up on Tuesday morning, there was a long, terrifying moment of not remembering where I was. For a handful of seconds, I just laid there, blinking and looking around the strange room I’d found myself in.
Then, it all came flooding back to me, and I remembered that last night I had become the newest resident of The Family Ranch, the newest member of Heaven’s Temple…the newest follower of the reverend Ronald Reynolds. Unsurprisingly, these recollections did not offer me any comfort.
When I sat up and rubbed my eyes, I saw that Fae was already up and dressed, and she was sitting up on her bed looking at me. I glanced out the single window in the room, the dim light telling me it had to be early morning, and looked over at the third bed in our room to see that it was also empty.
“What t-time is it?” I asked, stifling a yawn with the back of my hand.
Fae’s smile gave no indication of the tears I knew she’d been crying only a couple of hours ago, when she’d snuck back into our room in the middle of the night. “It’s already six-thirty, sleepy head,” she said. “I let you sleep in, since it’s your first day and all. Chores started half an hour ago. We’re late. We need to get to the daycare so we can relieve Troy and Madge. He’s supposed to be in shipping, but he agreed to watch the children for a bit while I roused you, and I’ve already reassigned Madge, so she also needs to get to her other tasks.”
That was a lot to take in at the ungodly hour. I did the math in my head, which was throbbing a little because I couldn’t have gotten more than five hours of sleep, e
specially not with all the comings and goings. I shook my head to clear it. “Shipping?” I asked, standing and stretching.
Fae stood too. “Yeah, we bake, package and ship the chocolate-covered pretzels all here at the ranch. Helps us keep the production costs low.”
I nodded, and an inkling swirled in my stomach, a thought so fleeting I couldn’t grab hold of it before it was gone. I decided I would ponder it later, though, because Fae was obviously waiting for me.
She tossed me a pair of khaki shorts and a white t-shirt identical to the ones she was wearing, and scooted my tennis shoes toward me with her foot. “Get dressed. Then you can use the bathroom if you have to,” she said, and then she just stood there.
Realizing that she expected me to strip down and change clothes while she was still in the room, I suppressed a sigh and thought I was smart for having brought so little with me to the ranch. My cell phone was still at my apartment, and when I looked over to see that my car keys were no longer on the dresser where I’d left them last night, I knew that had been the right move. They’d surely searched my car by now, and if my cell phone had been in there, they would have found text messages from Kyle.