by Diana Bold
Bethany returned with her coffee pot full of snow, and fussed with the fire for a moment, finding a place to heat it. He watched her, still half wondering if he’d really made it back or if this was just a dream and he was dying in the snow somewhere. If not for the pain streaking through his extremities, he would have thought the latter.
“It’s horrible out there.” He took a swig of the cheap whiskey and let it burn all the way down his gut—a strange sensation since the rest of him was still freezing. “We were lucky to find this cave. Coyotes have been at the bodies. They’re barely recognizable.”
Bethany met his gaze with a look of utter adoration. “If you hadn’t come back for me, I would have died.”
“Anyone else would have done the same.” Her gratitude made him uncomfortable. Christ, he hoped gratitude wasn’t all she felt for him.
She shook her head with utter certainty. “No. Most men in your situation would have left me without a backward glance and worried about saving their own neck. You’re a good man, Zach. A very good man.” As she spoke, she moved back into his arms, holding him for all she was worth.
A good man. It had been so long since anyone had looked at him as anything but a killer and a convict unworthy of respect or even common decency. Eyes burning with tears he’d never allow himself to shed, he pressed his lips against the soft cloud of her hair, shivering from both the cold and the strength of his emotions.
Bethany held him without speaking until the coffee began to percolate. “Let me get you something hot to drink.” Moving away with reluctance, she bustled around, putting their meager supplies against the cave wall and stacking the firewood near the fire. Then she brought him a hot cup of coffee and a few pieces of jerky. “Eat something,” she urged. “You need to rebuild your strength.”
He took the cup, letting the steam warm his face for a moment before he put it to his lips. The tin was hot, easing some of the chill from his fingertips. “Mmm, thank you, darlin’.”
When she continued to hold out the jerky, he took it, even though he had no desire to eat. Perhaps she was right. The trip back to the coach had sapped every bit of his strength.
Resolutely, he gnawed on the tough, peppery shoe-leather tasting piece of meat.
She watched him until she was certain he’d obeyed then turned away to shake the woodchips out of the new blanket and drape it in front of the fire to dry. “The storm is bad, isn’t it?”
“The worst I’ve ever seen,” he admitted grimly. “The snow is worse now than it was yesterday. Who knows how long it will last? I’m afraid you’re stuck here with me for a while.”
“I don’t mind,” she said as she straightened their pallet. “I’m not in a hurry to reach Texas. I’m glad to have a few more days here with you.”
“I’m glad, too. In fact, when I looked outside and saw it was still snowing, I felt like I’d been granted a reprieve from the gallows.”
She gave him a quick, horrified glance. “They’re not going to hang you, are they?”
He gave a rough laugh. “It was a figure of speech, but it’s not impossible. That’s why I have to leave, eventually. I don’t want to involve you any further in the mess I’ve made of my life.”
“What if I want to be involved?” The purity of her earnest green gaze slayed him.
“You don’t even know me. If you did, you’d never say such things. You’d never let me hold you and touch you.”
He’d meant to scare her away, but she didn’t look scared. Instead, she gave him a gentle smile. “I know you, Zach. I know you better than I knew David when we wed.”
He didn’t want to argue, not when he wanted to believe every word she said. And he had to admit what she said made sense. Though he’d known her less than two days, he felt closer to her than he’d ever felt to Hannah. Or perhaps it was just because he’d been alone for so long and their circumstances were so dire.
“I just hope you don’t come to regret being so good to me.” With a sigh, he drank the rest of his coffee and crawled toward the pallet, letting her tuck the covers around him. “I’m going to rest for a while, darlin’. Is that all right?”
“Of course,” she whispered, pressing a tender kiss to his brow. “Rest, sweetheart. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
Chapter Six
Bethany’s unlikely hero slept. She knelt beside him, tracing his weary, beard-roughened features with her gaze. It terrified her to think how close he’d come to freezing to death today.
He’d risked his life to save her. Not just once, but twice.
No one had ever put her needs before their own. Her relationship with David had always been one sided. She’d always been the one to give, and he’d taken from her until she had nothing left.
Zach would never treat a woman he loved in such a way. He’d already proven he could keep her safe and make her feel cherished. She’d meant it when she’d told him she knew him better already than she’d ever known David.
With a sigh, she moved away and forced herself to eat half of one of the sandwiches left over from the sack lunches. She drank a few sips of the nasty whiskey and then climbed beneath the blankets, pressing as close to Zach as she could
His skin was still freezing cold to the touch. Only total exhaustion could have allowed him to fall asleep in such a state. Shivering, she chafed his fingers and toes until they began to warm. When the chill had faded somewhat, she snuggled close, determined to get some rest while he did. They’d both been up most of the previous night, and the day had been long and wearying. Within moments, she was fast asleep.
* * * * *
When Bethany awoke, she had no idea how long she’d slept. Zach curled around her, his big body warm at last. Cocooned beneath the weight of nearly half a dozen blankets, she was almost too warm. Still, she didn’t want to move and risk waking him. She wanted him to sleep as long as he needed.
If he’d been on the run for weeks, she doubted he’d gotten a good night’s sleep since before he escaped; perhaps even longer than that.
As she lay in the circle of his arms, she tried to think of a way out of the mess he’d gotten himself into. If only the lawmen on his trail would believe he’d died in the wreck… She sat up, dislodging the blankets as she remembered something Zach had said when he’d returned from his latest supply mission.
Coyotes have been at the bodies. They’re barely recognizable.
Zach gave a soft moan of complaint as the cold air rushed in and touched his bare skin, but when she covered him up, he sighed and went back to sleep. The coach driver had been a young, dark-haired man. How badly had the coyotes torn at the bodies? Was there a possibility the driver could be mistaken for Zach? What if he was wearing the shackles?
Pushing to her feet, she padded barefoot across the cave, shivering as she entered the tunnel. When she reached the end, she stared outside, realizing it was morning already. It was still snowing, but the wind had died down. The tracks Zach had made in the snow were still discernible, leaving a trail she could follow with relative ease.
If she could make it back to the coach and find the shackles, she could put them on the driver’s body. It had to be done now, before it stopped snowing, so it wasn’t obvious it had been done after the wreck. Perhaps she could grab some things from her trunk, too.
The wind wasn’t blowing anymore, so it shouldn’t be too hard. She could do it, for Zach. Lord knew he’d done far more for her.
Taking a deep, fortifying breath, she went back inside the cave to get dressed.
* * * * *
When Zach discovered Bethany had left, he went out of his mind with worry. Where the hell had she gone? Had she run away from him? Would she rather die in the snow than spend another night in his arms?
As he pulled on his damp clothes, he cursed himself for having slept so long. It had been years since he’d slept so deeply. Having Bethany at his side had allowed him to do so. Even in his sleep, he’d known she wasn’t a threat.
But her disappe
arance rattled him. Had she gone for help? Had she decided she wanted nothing to do with a murderer? A convict? A man who’d never had any right to put his hands on her in the first place?
His fears dissipated when he reached the cave entrance and saw the storm had abated. The snow still fell fast and hard, but the bitter wind had quieted. She’d followed his tracks, back in the direction the coach.
Girding himself to go back out into the cold, he followed.
He hadn’t gone very far when he caught sight of her, about fifty yards away, struggling to pull something large and heavy through the waist-deep snow behind her.
“Bethany,” he yelled, relief and anger warring within him. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Come help,” she called. “This thing is heavy.”
Fuming, he stomped toward her. Had she risked her life to go and retrieve a trunk full of fripperies? He hadn’t thought her vain, but now he reminded himself he didn’t know her at all.
She hadn’t managed to move the trunk very far by the time he reached her, and he wondered how long she’d been at this. She was stubborn; he’d give her that.
“What’s in here that’s so important?” he groused as he reached her side.
“Blankets. Pillows. Some honey and preserves. Some heavy clothing—coats and gloves and such.” She extended her hands, wiggling her fingers to show she was wearing gloves. “If we’re going to be living in the cave for a few more days, I thought they would come in handy.”
He stared at her, noting the shy pride on her flushed cheeks. Though she was panting from her exertion and had to be half-frozen, she seemed in high spirits. He sighed, raking his hand through his hair. “Darlin’, what were you thinking? I could have gone after this. There was no reason for you to do it yourself.”
She smiled and threw herself into his arms, nearly knocking him down with her exuberance. “This trunk isn’t the main reason I went back to the coach.”
He hugged her, breathing in her light, flowery scent, thanking God once again that she was all right. “Why did you go, then?”
She pulled away, reaching once again for the trunk handle. “Help me move this while I tell you. I want to get back to the cave as soon as possible. It’s freezing out here.”
He shook his head, smiling, but reached down and took the handle from her. “I can get it. You just talk.”
She looked as though she was going to protest, but he gave her a stern look and she complied with a laugh. “All right. But if you need a rest, let me know.”
“Just talk.” He gave the trunk a mighty pull, surprised to find it glided pretty well over the compacted snow. She watched him for a few moments, then fell into step behind him.
“When I woke up, I started thinking about what you said last night. About the coyotes having been at the bodies?”
He turned to look at her, and she shuddered. “It was horrible, but you were right. It’s impossible to tell what they once looked like. So, I found the shackles and put them on the driver.”
“You did what?” He stopped, staring at her in stunned disbelief.
She nodded, looking hopeful and so sweet it broke his heart. “It wasn’t easy, but I remembered where you were standing when you tossed them to the ground. Anyway, I dug through the snow until I found them. I figure when help comes, I’ll just tell them you and the marshal were killed in the wreck, and the driver went for help and never came back. I don’t think they’ll look too hard. They have no reason not to believe me. Then, in a few weeks, you can assume a new name and find me in Texas.”
Overwhelmed, he sank down on the trunk, aghast and amazed. He couldn’t believe she’d come up with such a brilliant plan, trekked through the storm to implement it, and put shackles on a half-eaten, two-day-old corpse, all so they could stay together without the law breathing down their necks.
“Ah, Bethany,” he murmured, his voice heavy with regret. “You don’t know how much this means to me, but I can’t let you go through with it. I can’t let you lie to the law just so I can go free. I’d rather go back to prison for the rest of my life than risk seeing you there for even a day.”
Her smile slipped, and hurt gathered in her expressive eyes. “Let’s talk about this once we get back to the cave. I’m freezing.”
Squaring her shoulders, she turned and trudged through the snow, all the fire and excitement that had gotten her through the last few hours dampened by his thoughtless words.
He was such an ass. She’d done all this for him; he could have at least praised her plan, shown her he appreciated the thought and effort she’d put into it. With a heavy sigh, he pushed to his feet and started after her, pulling the heavy trunk in his wake.
“It’s not that I don’t think it’s a good plan,” he called, frustrated with her sudden change of mood. “I think it’s a great plan. I just don’t want you to do anything you’ll regret once this is all behind you.”
She whirled to face him, anger replacing the hurt. “Is that what you think? That I’m doing this because I’m a stupid, helpless woman stuck in circumstances beyond my control? Do you think once help comes I’ll forget how much I’ve come to care about you and regale my friends with stories of the dangerous outlaw who forced me to make love to him?”
He stumbled to a stop, a little taken aback by her furious tirade. In truth, he did worry, once she was safe and sound at her sister’s house in Texas, that she’d look back on him with embarrassment, if not shame.
“You’re the sweetest person I’ve ever met, darlin’. You’d say please and thank you to a grizzly. Once you’re safely away from here, I’m afraid you’ll realize that allowing me in your bed was a mistake. I just don’t want to see you compound it by lying to the law.”
With a wordless sound of outrage, she spun on her heels and stomped away, stumbling through the snow, mumbling beneath her breath as she outdistanced him. Frowning, he watched her for a moment, then started after her, wondering what he’d done to turn his little snow angel into a fire-breathing dragon.
Chapter Seven
Bethany reached the cave a full quarter of an hour before Zach. She used the time to strip out of her damp clothes and warm herself by the fire, still fuming from the argument they’d had outside.
How dare he infer she didn’t know her own mind? That what she felt for him was a product of fear and helplessness? Hadn’t she proven she could be resourceful? She’d made it all the way to the coach, dragged her trunk almost all the way back to the cave, and yet he acted as though she was a silly little woman who needed to be rescued from her own stupid feelings.
When Zach trudged into the cave, pulling the heavy trunk, she didn’t even turn to look at him. He thought she’d say please and thank you to a grizzly? Well, she didn’t intend to say please and thank you to him. Never again.
Let him go back to prison. Perhaps then he’d see the folly of his foolish pride!
Her senses thrummed with awareness as she listened to him open the trunk and sort through its contents. She’d never realized how hard it could be to ignore someone.
After a long time, he moved toward her, draping the warm folds of one of her grandmother’s quilts around her shoulders.
“Don’t be angry, darlin’.” He knelt before her, staring at her with unmistakable concern. “I didn’t intend to hurt you. Don’t you know how much you mean to me? I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you because of me.”
She let her pent-up breath escape in a shuddering sigh, unable to hold on to her ire when faced with his sweetness. “I’m terrified you don’t want to be with me, Zach. I fear all this has been a convenience, a way to pass the time until the weather clears.”
He gave a rough laugh and sank back on his heels. “What do you want me to say? I love you?” He shook his head. “I’ve only known you for three days. How can you expect me to promise a future when I don’t even know if I’ll have one?”
Her eyes welled with tears. She huddled deeper within the folds of the blanket,
feeling as though she’d never be warm again. “Of course, I don’t expect your love. But I just offered you a way out, a way for you to have a future, and you act as though you’d rather go back to jail than rely upon me to keep your secrets.”
He shoved to his feet with an exasperated sound and strode to the other side of the cave as though he couldn’t put enough distance between them. “Aren’t you listening to me? I would like nothing more than to do what you’ve suggested. I’d love a chance to see you again, to walk down the street with you and not have to look over my shoulder for fear someone was watching. I just don’t want to buy my freedom at the cost of yours!”
She cringed as his shouted words echoed against the walls of the cave. Part of her knew he was right. She was being unreasonable. He’d made it clear he’d only objected to her plan because he didn’t want to put her in danger. But deep down, she’d wanted to hear him say those words he’d mockingly thrown in her face. She wanted him to promise they would be together, not just for a few more days, but forever.
She’d wanted to know he loved her as much as she’d fallen in love with him.
* * * * *
Zach spent the rest of the afternoon going through their supplies, careful not to let his gaze fall upon his angry little companion. She hadn’t spoken to him since their furious exchange, and he was beginning to wonder if she ever intended to talk to him again.
He carried one of the heavy wool lap blankets over to the narrow entrance, hoping to figure out a way to rig it across the opening, trapping as much of their heat as possible inside. They had a nice little stack of firewood now, but he didn’t know how long it would be before they could travel, and he didn’t want to run out.
As he wedged the blanket in a crack in the wall, he thought back to the fight he’d had with Bethany, wondering what the hell she wanted from him. Why was she so angry? He feared she’d been angling for some sort of a commitment. She wanted him to tell her he loved her, even though they’d just met.