My eyes flicked to the bandaged wound on his hand. He’d had since after the day he dropped me off on that cliff to face the Redcap. My mind began to piece together puzzle pieces that felt as though they should never, ever fit together. But they did. Kael’s wound, his strange attitudes about the Redcaps, the way he’d told me that the quest to get the flower was mine and mine alone.
Surely he wasn’t...
Surely he couldn’t be...
Regardless, he was burning up, and if I didn’t get him out of this brush, he was only going to get worse. I’d spotted a cave around the corner. All I had to do was get him there and do my best to calm the fever.
Easier said than done.
With a deep breath, I grabbed his arms and tried to lift him from the ground. Only, he didn’t go anywhere. Kael was heavy. Much heavier than he looked. He must have approximately zero body fat, which meant I was trying to lift pounds and pounds of pure muscle.
As horrible as it was, I would just have to drag him there. He would likely get scratched and bruised, but at least he would be alive.
Snow began to drift from the sky as I jerked on Kael’s arms. He shifted slightly through the brush. It was only an inch or two, but it was something. Enough to solidify my determination. Grunting, I pulled and pulled. Each time, Kael barely budged, but I finally got him out of the brush where I plopped onto the ground, sweat streaming down my face.
The snow was coming down heavily now. I really needed to get Kael under some cover, or he was going to get soaked to the skin. And that would only make the fever worsen.
It was easier to slide him across the snow than drag him through thick branches, though my energy was fully spent by the time I got us into the cave. Once inside, I draped my cloak over his body and got to work on a fire. There were a few branches and old twigs scattered across the cave floor. Enough to get some flames going.
I wasn’t entirely sure how I knew how to do this, but the motions came to me as if by second nature. Soon, a small fire began to take shape, and a soft warmth began to spread through the cave.
Sighing, I eased onto the ground next to Kael and felt his forehead. He was still impossibly warm. Truth was, there was nothing much I could do for him. We needed to get back to the Academy where the healing powers of the Summer fae could save him. Perhaps I could shift back to the grounds, like I’d done before.
It was worth a shot.
With a deep breath, I closed my eyes and focused my thoughts on the Academy. On the cold stone walls. On the soft glow of the fireplace in the dining hall. The familiar sounds and scents of my new home rose up around me, and for a moment, I thought I’d done it.
But when I opened my eyes, the darkness met me instead. We were still very much inside that cave, miles and miles from the Academy’s walls.
Pressing my hands to Kael’s burning chest, I shook my head. “I’m so sorry, Kael. I don’t know what to do for you. If only I could get you home, the Summer fae could heal you...”
A strange thought took shape in my head, one that clearly made no logical sense in the least. I’d shifted before, when I’d been stranded on that cliff. Therefore, I was an Autumn or a Winter fae. But our Head Instructor had also said that it was easy to get it wrong in the beginning.
And, truth was, I did feel drawn to the ways of the Summer Court. I liked the heat. I liked the sun. I loved the way I could hear the chirping crickets as I drifted off to sleep every night. I didn’t find the warmth stifling. Instead, it made me feel free.
And then there was Liam, the hotheaded, passionate Summer fae who I had to admit made me feel something. There was a strange connection between us, one that was next to impossible to ignore.
Maybe, just maybe, I wasn’t a Winter or an Autumn at all. Maybe I was a Summer fae.
Maybe I could heal Kael.
No, that doesn’t make any sense, Norah, a small, logical voice whispered into my ear. You’ve felt a connection with Finn, too. And you’re clearly not a Spring.
“Not to mention that weird attraction to Rourke,” I muttered to myself. As much as I hated to admit it, I’d felt a spark of something toward him, too.
And the fae before me. As I’d watched him face off against the creature, there’d been so much power flowing off his body that it was impossible not to notice. He was cold and distant, yes, but there was something more there, too. Something he kept hidden from everyone. Something I’d seen a hint of before.
I shook my head at myself. So what if I was attracted to all of them? Everyone else at the Academy probably was, too. They were gorgeous fae males with glistening skin, muscular bodies, and blinding smiles. I couldn’t help it if I felt a connection with more than one of them. We weren’t mates. Not yet.
Which meant I still didn’t know the full truth about my powers. Perhaps we’d all been wrong. It was worth a shot.
I took a deep breath in through my nose to steady my nerves. After lifting Kael’s heavy cloak from his body, I slid my hands underneath his shirt. His skin was smooth and hot, and my fingertips played along the ridges of his abs. I swallowed hard and stared down at him. His fever must be catching because I’d never been hotter in my life.
But now was not the time to get carried away by how strong and muscular his body felt underneath my hands. I closed my eyes and focused on the fever radiating off of his body. I had no idea how Liam had healed me, but I mimicked what I’d seen him do. He’d touched my skin and closed his eyes. Within moments, the pain had gone.
Heal, I thought, directing all my thoughts and emotions to Kael’s slack body. Fight off the fever. You can do, it Kael.
A strange sensation began to pool around my hands. Fire and light. The scent of frost fell away, replaced by a rush of wildflowers and summer rain. My entire body began to tremble, as if an unseen violent force was charging through me. Head spinning, I squeezed my eyes tighter, not certain if I should welcome the sensation or push it away.
But this was Kael’s life. So, I dropped back my head and opened myself up to the strange power that was taking over my body.
Pain exploded around my fingers, sharp and deep and raw.
And then it all vanished into nothing as unconsciousness consumed me.
A soft hand caressed my cheek, and the sharp, tangy scent of mint filled my nose. Groaning, I opened my eyes to find Kael leaning over me, his face blotting out the full moon in the sky. His eyes were pits of black, but the expression on his face was much softer than I’d ever seen from him before.
“Thank the forest,” he said as he continued to brush my cheek with his thumb. “For a moment there, I was worried you weren’t coming back to me.”
“I don’t feel so great.” My mouth felt as dry as the desert, and some kind of evil jackhammer was drilling into my skull. Even my vision was dizzy. Kael wasn’t just Kael. I swore there were four of him bouncing around in front of me. I reached back to rub my neck, and my fingers came into contact with a leg. Kael’s leg. I blinked, heartbeat flickering. It seemed my head was in his lap.
“You’ll feel rough for a few hours,” he said. “You tried to heal me without understanding how the power works. It can knock out even the most experienced fae, and this was your first time doing it.”
“And it worked,” I said, realizing just how alive and well Kael was. In fact, the tables had turned. I was now the one flat on my ass. “You’re okay? The fever is gone?”
At that, Kael’s face clouded back over to his usual stoic expression. His jaw clenched, and the thumb caressing my cheek ceased to move. “Yes, the fever is gone. I suppose you have some questions, and you no doubt are thrilled to discover you’re not a Winter fae now that you know the truth about me.”
“Come on. That’s not fair,” I said with a frown. “Don’t assume I’m going to judge you just because you’re a...well, what are you, Kael? Because you certainly don’t look like a Redcap to me.”
“I’m not a Redcap. Not truly.” He let out a heavy sigh. “Two years ago, I was infected when
I was fighting against a group of Redcaps who had gone on a spree in Boston. They needed to be stopped, and I thought I could be the one to stop them. Instead, I got bitten.”
Chills swept down my spine, but I kept my mouth shut. Kael seemed hesitant enough to tell his story. I didn’t want to interrupt him with questions, for fear he’d change his mind about sharing this part of himself.
“Because I was already fae, my body was able to withstand the damage, though I regret every single day that I didn’t go straight in search of some Starlight.” He curled his hands into fists and shook his head, jaw clenching tight. “The beast does not control me. I control it. But it is still inside of me, and sometimes, my body must change into that creature. That day on the cliff…I thought I had it under control. I was just trying to scare you into being better with the bow. But instead…I’m so sorry, Norah. I’ll never forgive myself for biting you.”
A deep silence rained down upon us while I processed his words. I’d had a hunch that it was something like this, though the pain his voice was worse than I’d thought. He hated what he’d become, so much so that he let it control him. He didn’t want anyone to get close to him, for fear they’d find out the truth and push him away.
“Is that why you think that no one would want to have you as a mate?” I finally asked.
His jaw rippled as he nodded. “No one wants a beast. I didn’t want to come to the Academy, but I had no choice. My father forced me to come here. The only way I can inherit his lands is to bring home a changeling mate. Otherwise, I’m homeless and penniless. No Winter fae can survive without both.”
“Well, I’ll tell you what. Your father sounds about as terrible as my step-dad.”
Kael arched an eyebrow. “That’s what your focusing on? Not the fact I’m one of those monsters you hate and fear?”
With a soft smile, I reached up and touched his face. His skin was no longer on fire, but he felt just as strong and as real as ever. “You’re not a monster, Kael. In fact, you’re pretty much the opposite.”
He caught my hand in his and pressed it tighter to his cheek, but then, his eyes darkened. “You’re only saying that because you now know that you’re not a Winter fae. If you were able to heal me the way you did, then it’s impossible. You’ll belong to Liam, the opposite of all that I am.”
Confusion rippled through me. Not about my nature. I’d had the same questions. Did this make me Summer fae? But that wasn’t what made my heart feel as if it had split in two. Disappointment and happiness were mixed together as one. I didn’t know what was up and what was down.
“Liam’s not so bad,” I finally said, though the words didn’t seem strong enough to convey exactly how I felt. “But...you’re not so bad either.”
His lifted his eyebrows. “Faint praise.”
“I don’t think I know how to explain how I feel.” I glanced at where our hands were still interlocked, and I sighed. “To be honest, I’m confused. One minute, I think I want to be a Summer fae. The next minute, I want to be a Winter, especially when I realize that Winter fae are not as cold and unfeeling as they want everyone to think.”
“I could kiss you right now,” he said in a rough voice. “No one has ever accepted me for what I am. And yet here you are...and I can never have you. One of the other changelings is my mate, but I can’t imagine any of them by my side.”
My heart thundered hard. I wanted him to kiss me, too. My hands were even shaking at the thought of it. “Maybe the healing thing was a fluke. Maybe we’ll find out I really am a Winter fae.”
“And do you want to be a Winter fae, Norah?” His eyes glittered in the darkness of the cave. “Do you want to be mine?”
Yes and no, I thought. I wanted to be his, and I wanted to be Liam’s, but I didn’t dare voice that thought aloud. Instead, I merely gave him a soft smile. I’m so screwed. I’m never going to be able to figure out what I want. How could I ever choose?
Chapter Nineteen
When we returned to the Academy, Finn, Liam, and Rourke were waiting for us in the library. They looked...disgruntled, to say the least. Arms were crossed over chests, frowns were pulling down lips. They really had the whole disapproving teacher look down pat. I wondered how long they’d been standing here like this.
“Honestly, Kael.” Rourke was the first to speak when we shifted back. “I could believe it of Liam, but you? You’ve got better sense than to take Norah away from here when a bunch of Redcaps have been stalking around just waiting for a chance to attack her.”
“She was fine,” Kael said in a curt tone of voice. “We were far enough away from the Academy that Redcaps weren’t an issue.”
Liam’s face was lined in a scowl, and his bonfire eyes scanned me from head to toe, missing nothing. “Then, why is she ten shades paler than normal? Why is she shaking? What the hell have you done to her?”
Finn was by my side within an instant, sliding his arms around me before I went splat onto the floor. Because Liam was right. I was still nauseous and dizzy, and I felt as though I could barely stand.
Finn huffed as I leaned heavily against him. “Look, Kael. I know she’s probably your mate and all, but you can’t do stuff like this.”
“She’s not my mate,” Kael said softly.
“What?” Rourke asked in a snap. “Are you finally conceding that shifting doesn’t belong to you and you alone? I keep telling you she’s an Autumn fae, and not Winter, but—”
“She’s not yours either.” Kael lifted a finger, pointing it straight at Liam. “She’s his.”
Every head in the room turned toward Liam, whose frown had morphed into an arrogant grin. He crossed his arms over his chest and shot me a wink. Even though I hated the direction this conversation was headed, my cheeks flamed anyway. It was annoying how easily the fae could make me blush, especially since it did nothing but feed his massive ego.
“I knew she wasn’t a cold season,” he said. “You’ve been so stuck on the fact she shifted when she was terrified, but I always thought her fear had more to do with it than anything else.”
“Now, wait a minute,” Finn said, directing his attention toward Kael. “Why do you suddenly think she’s a Summer fae?”
“I had a little run-in with a Breking in the mountains,” Kael said, lips pressed tight together. “She wasn’t able to shift us back, but she did heal me. That’s why she’s so weak.”
Liam clapped his hands and gave me a wide grin. “Good going, darling.”
“Spring fae are sometimes able to heal as well,” Finn argued. “It isn’t a gift that is solely the realm of Summers.”
Rourke frowned. “Again, she was mostly likely afraid in that scenario. I don’t think we can accurately call her a Summer fae until she’s been at the Academy longer.”
“I agree. She’s clearly Spring.”
“Guys,” I said, holding up my hands and twisting my way out of Finn’s warm embrace. “Please stop. You’re all giving me a headache in addition to the headache I already had from the healing thing I did.”
The four of them fell silent and stared at me. I shifted on my feet. It was a little unnerving to have their undivided attention like this, but a part of me kind of liked it, as much as I hated to admit it. They were arguing over which Court I belonged to...which meant every single one of them must have felt the same connections I did.
Why did it have to be just one of them in the end?
“I’m tired,” I finally said. “I’m going to go get some rest.”
They all started talking over each other, arguing about who would escort me back to my apartment. With a roll of my eyes, I held up my hand again. “I can make it to my room by myself.”
They didn’t argue, but they did follow me out into the hallway to watch me walk away. And now that I had my back turned to them, I could let the massive smile widen across my face. Now this...this I could get used to.
As soon as the sun broke through the morning clouds, I slid out of my bedroom window and whispered across
the lawn. I’d donned an Autumn golden cloak, and I managed to clamber onto the horse Liam and I had taken when we’d visited Esari. I needed to find Bree, give her the flower, and return to the Academy before anyone noticed I was gone.
It was strange going alone. While I’d spent most of my life in the presence of my own company, Otherworld Academy had been different. There was always someone around, except during the long stretches on Watch Duty. At first, I found it unnerving, but I’d grown used to the bustle of activity and the changelings who were beginning to feel like friends.
When I reached the edge of the Autumn woods, I slowed the horse and dropped to the ground. I’d told Bree to hide out somewhere nearby, but it was impossible to know exactly where she’d gone. I’d just have to explore every inch of the edge of the woods until I found her.
After at least two hours of walking, the crack of a branch sounded from behind me. I whirled on my feet, expecting to see Bree’s relieved face under her mess of dark hair. Instead, several Autumn fae stood before me, aiming arrows at my throat.
“Who are you and why are you here?” A silver-haired fae strode forward from the group, his golden eyes glittering like stars.
I held up my hands. “I’m one of the recruits at Otherworld Academy. I’m just here looking for my friend.”
His eyes narrowed. “The Academy is hours away.”
“I rode a horse,” I said, hands still raised. “I left it back there at the edge of the woods while I searched for my friend.”
“And why is your friend lost in our woods?” he asked in a steely voice. “As I said before, the Academy is hours away. It seems unlikely she would have wandered that far from home.”
I didn’t really have a good excuse for this, so I had to use the first thought that popped into my brain.
“She found out that she’s an Autumn fae last week,” I said. “She was curious about this place, so she decided to go off and explore. It’s been a couple of days since she left, so I thought I’d come looking for her.”
A Dance with Darkness Page 15