Eternal (Eternal series)
Page 20
Destry tossed the fishing gear into the back of his truck and opened the driver’s side door for Emma again. She slid in, not bothering to scoot over as far this time.
Destry hopped in and started the truck and they headed back down the bumpy road toward her car.
Chapter 23: BATTLE
“I’ll see ya later then?” Destry asked casually, as he placed Emma's quilt back in her car.
“Are you sure? You just endured a whole afternoon with me, aren’t you sick of me yet?” Emma questioned.
“I don’t think I could ever get sick of you, Emma,” Destry chuckled, “you’re too much fun!”
“I’m glad I entertain you,” Emma muttered sarcastically.
“I’ll pick you up around seven,” he called back, as he walked toward his truck.
“Great,” Emma answered, and then mumbling to herself, “let’s just dig the hole deeper, so you’ll never get out Emma.”
Destry waited for Emma to start her car then pulled away from the meadow.
Emma watched as his truck disappeared in a cloud of dust around the bend. She slowly edged her car forward onto the dirt road toward home.
What was she going to do? Emma's mind was swirling again and her chest ached. These few hours spent with Destry had been some of the most confusing of her entire life. How could she feel these kinds of feelings when she was with him?
The stress of the impending decision was taking a toll on her. She felt jittery and weak. She was having a hard time focusing, and felt as if she might start hyperventilating at any moment. She began taking deep breaths in and out, trying to calm her hammering heart that threatened to bust through her rib cage.
Emma reached over and turned the radio up as loud as it would go. She didn't want to think. The noise helped to overpower her conflicting thoughts. Her eardrums pounded and her head hurt but at least that made it hard to think about anything else.
Emma drove extra slow down the dirt road; she didn’t want to catch up with Destry. Gradually she noticed everything in the cab of her car beginning to get fuzzy. The air seemed to be hot and moving like in a mirage. Maybe she was about to pass out from all the stress.
There was a discernible shimmering.
“Holy Cow!” She screamed, and skidded off the road coming to a stop in a cloud of dust.
Sitting in the seat right next to her, was Micah. He simply stared at her with his perfect eyes, and a questioning look.
“Are you trying to give me a heart attack?” Emma screeched.
“I’m sorry Emma. I didn’t know I would startle you that way.”
“Well how did you think I would react to someone suddenly showing up in my car while it was moving?” she demanded.
“I said your name a couple of times before I appeared. Did you not hear me?” Micah asked curiously.
“No, I didn’t,” Emma sighed, trying to calm her erratically beating heart.
“That’s been happening a lot lately,” he said with an air of accusation.
“I’m sorry Micah. I’ve had a lot on my mind I guess.” Emma didn’t want him to be upset with her. She stared at his perfect face, and smiled softly. He looked oddly out of place sitting there in her ratty old car in all of his perfection. “Did you need me for something specific?”
“No, I was just thinking about you. We don’t get to talk the way we used to,” he said pointedly. “I miss our easy conversations—I miss you.”
“We just talked last night.”
“You’re right, but I had the feeling you were irritated with me.”
“You weren’t there when I needed you,” Emma said quietly. “I was afraid you might not come back.”
“I’m sorry about that. I didn’t mean to make you worry.”
“I really needed you to confirm your feelings. I need to know where this is going for sure.” Emma looked into his deep blue eyes, hoping she hadn’t offended him.
“Why do we have to rush things Emma?” He said, irritated at being cornered.
“Don’t you remember what I told you before Micah? I don’t have endless amounts of time like you do. I need to live life while it’s here, before it moves past me!” Why was he having such a hard time telling her his feelings?
“I’m sorry my slow pace torments you,” he said, no feeling in his voice.
“I need to know Micah,” Emma stated firmly.
“Is it because you were with Destry today?” His words had a hint of accusation, but he held eye contact, showing no emotion on his lovely face.
“Does it really matter?” Why did he keep coming back to the Destry thing?
“It does matter, actually.”
“Why, Micah? Why can’t you just answer my questions and leave Destry out of it? Are you jealous? Are you angry that I spend time with him? Are you hoping I’ll forget about you?”
“No,” he said flatly.
“What do you mean no? Which part of my question are you answering?”
“I’m answering all of it,” he said simply.
“So you’re not jealous, and you’re not angry….”
“And I don’t want you to forget about me,” he interjected with his velvet voice.
Emma stared at him, confusion twisting her face. If Micah didn’t want her to forget about him, but he wasn’t jealous of Destry, then where did he stand?
“I’m still confused,” she said meekly, “you never answered my first question. What exactly do you want from me? What do you need me to be for you? I don’t want you to leave me, but I don‘t know what my role is in all of this.”
“I won’t leave you Emma,” he spoke calmly. “I just want you to be you. That’s all I need from you.”
“But that’s not all I need from you!” Emma demanded.
“I told you from the beginning that this would be difficult. If this isn't enough for you, you're free to walk away. We can’t have any more of a relationship than we have right now, we're from different worlds.”
“But you can touch me,” Emma argued.
“Not in the way that you need it.”
“We could work something out. Last night, all those things you said, they made me think you wanted this too.”
“I want you to be happy Emma, that’s all I want.”
“You make me happy,” she yielded to his glowing perfection. She didn't want to fight with him. She was worn out from the constant back and forth of her mind.
He reached out and stroked her face, sending tingles through her body. “You make me happy too.” His voice was soft.
Emma smiled at him and reached out to touch his face. Her hand felt him, but there was nothing really there. It was like sticking your finger into water.
“You’d better get home,” he reminded her.
“I guess you’re right,” Emma sighed. She tried to push the empty feeling from her mind. “My mom will be upset if there’s no dinner.”
He reached his finger out and ran it along her cheek again. It felt like a feather tickling the tiny hairs that covered her skin, but she couldn’t really feel it. It was more like a whisper of a feeling.
An almost indiscernible look of pain and longing crossed his face before his form became fuzzy and tiny points of light replaced the air where he had appeared to be just moments before. Emma watched him break apart, feeling the sadness of his leaving break her into pieces as well.
“I love you, Emma,” came the echo of his voice, and he was gone.
Emma's heart did a few flips in her chest. Micah loved her. He did have feelings for her.
Emma felt light as air, almost weightless. She talked to an angel, she saw him, and he loved her.
Then Emma remembered there was another boy that made her feel the same way.
Destry's breathing finally slowed as he reached his house and got out of his truck, closing the door and leaning against it.
For some reason his heart had started racing the moment he'd left Emma at her car. He was really in deep. Something a
bout this girl had him being thrown for loops.
He couldn't fight it anymore. He had to tell her tonight. But how do you tell someone they are the center of your universe and you feel like you’re just revolving around them with no idea why or how to stop?
Did she have any idea what she was doing to him? He didn’t feel like himself any more. It was as if he was an extension of her. Everything she did, everything she thought, every move she made affected him. Destry felt like he was in a poem or a sappy love song. The sky lost its color and everything looked gray when Emma wasn't around, food lost its taste. But when he was with her, everything was vivid and new as if he were seeing it for the first time, like he'd been blind before.
Destry slammed his back up against the door of his truck. There was no way he was going to be able to tell Emma all of this without coming off as some sort of a stalker freak. She'd probably run screaming. That's what any sane person would do, because there was no question that nothing about this was sane.
Destry took a deep breath and closed his eyes. It didn't help; Emma's face seemed to be etched into his mind like it had been for months now.
He needed to come up with a rational explanation that she could understand. Unfortunately, he still didn't know what that was himself.
As he stood, leaning against his truck, the sun warmed the front of him. It reminded him of the way it had felt being pressed up against Emma while he'd been teaching her to fish. The feeling had been indescribable; it had aroused strange things in him he couldn't seem to forget. It wasn't just the typical guy feelings that he assumed all boys got when their bodies were that close to someone of the opposite sex—not that that hadn't been part of it. There was more to it than that.
Destry hadn't ever really dated before, so he couldn't be positive that this didn't happen to all guys, but he'd never heard of anything like it. When his body had been close to Emma's, pressed up against her, it was like something inside of her grabbed hold of something inside of him. They were connected on a deeper level, locked together, and the electrical current that ran through his body from hers had been intense.
If Emma had felt it, she hadn't let on. Of course, he'd done a pretty good job of hiding it himself, so maybe she had felt something.
He looked at his watch; two more hours until their date. One hundred and twenty minutes until he could be near her again; see her, smell her, touch her. It seemed like an eternity to him. What was he going to do with himself for that long?
He decided that his first plan of action should probably be to take a hot shower. He needed to get the fish smell off.
He headed toward the house.
On second thought, I'd better make it a cold shower, he thought to himself
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Catherine asked again at dinner, for the hundredth time it seemed. “You look kind of flushed.”
“I’m great mom,” Emma assured her with her best smile.
Emma had no intention of telling her mom about her afternoon of impromptu fishing. It would just cause Catherine to get unnecessarily excited. This thing with Destry couldn't go on much longer and she didn't want her mom trying to talk her out of anything.
Catherine continued to watch Emma suspiciously as she cleared the table, and washed the dishes alone without being asked. Even Cody raised a disbelieving eyebrow at her when she told him to go outside and play while it was still light, she didn’t need his help with dishes tonight.
Emma finished tidying the kitchen, and then moved on to her bedroom, picking up laundry and straightening the pillows on her bed. Keeping busy helped her avoid thinking about Micah and Destry and her own problems.
Her stomach lurched, as she heard the sound of a truck. Crap! Was it seven already? She heard the truck door close, and then seconds later there was a knock at the front door.
“It’s you again, huh?” Emma heard Cody challenge as he opened the door. She heard Destry chuckle wickedly.
“Is your sister ready Pip?” Emma heard him tease.
“Ha-ha-ha,” Cody faked a laugh. “You’re sooo funny. My sister said to tell you she doesn’t want to go anywhere with you. She said that she thinks you’re dumb!”
At hearing Cody’s taunting Emma rushed to the front door, pushing him out of the way.
“Sorry about that,” she said rolling her eyes in Cody’s direction.
“Not as sorry as you’re gonna be when you marry that dork, and your kids come out looking like goblins,” Cody yelled from behind her.
“Shut up Cody!” Emma yelled back, and then composed herself the best she could as she turned back to Destry and gave him a cheesy grin. “Are you ready to go?”
“Yep,” he said smiling, apparently unaffected by Cody’s not-so-nice welcome.
Emma pushed him out the door, closing it quickly behind them, hoping to escape unnoticed—but she wasn’t that lucky. She heard the door open again when they were just a few feet down the sidewalk.
“Emma,” her mom called from the doorway. “Are you going out?”
Emma closed her eyes tightly, making a face, and then turned to face her mom. “Oh...yeah…Mom. I’ll be back in a couple of hours, is that okay?”
“You two just stay out of trouble,” Catherine smiled warmly. “Nice to see you again Destry,” she cooed.
“Nice to see you too ma’am,” Destry said sweetly. "How have you been?"
“Good, thanks,” Catherine continued to smile.
“Glad to hear it,” Destry returned with his smooth voice, and gave her a handsome smile.
“Have fun,” Catherine said, with a little wave and turned back into the house, closing the door behind her.
“Sorry about that,” Emma said grimacing.
“There’s nothin’ to be sorry about. I like your family. Your mom’s nice,” his smile was reassuring, “she reminds me a lot of my mom.”
“Oh,” was all Emma could say.
She realized now that she wasn't only going to be pushing Destry out of her life, but out of her family’s as well.
It hurt to hear him say her mom reminded him of his own mother who'd died. Emma was going to take that away from him too, and she hated herself for it.
Emma mustered up a weak attempt at a smile, and started towards Destry's truck again, him following right behind her. He rushed ahead of her to open the door, and she climbed in noticing her mom peeking out the front window from behind the curtains. Catherine winked at her, and Emma let out a silent groan.
Her mom liked Destry too. Emma remembered her asking after their prom date, where he was from. When Emma had told her that he'd just moved here from Nebraska with his dad, Catherine had gotten a perplexed look on her face. "That's odd," she'd said, "he looks so familiar to me."
Emma hadn’t been able to forget that comment because when she looked at him she had the same strange feeling, that she knew Destry from somewhere else.
Chapter 24: SPECIAL
They were already driving down the road when Emma snapped out of her trance. She looked over at Destry to see if he’d noticed her distant stare. He had.
“What are you thinking about?” He questioned calmly.
“I'm just a little embarrassed about my family,” Emma hoped he was buying it.
“Don’t worry about it,” he grinned, “I really do think they’re great!”
“You’re way too easy going,” Emma teased.
“I try not to sweat the small stuff,” he shrugged, “and everything is small stuff if you think about it.”
“So you’re an optimist, huh?” Emma smirked.
“Yeah, I guess you could say that. I try to be happy. There are too many miserable people in this world already, you know?”
“I’m pretty sure I fall into that category a lot,” Emma said dejectedly.
“You’re not miserable Emma,” he spoke seriously. “You just need to relax sometimes. Be happy for what you’ve got. If you think happy thoughts, you will be happy—generally speaking.�
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“That sounds like a line from Peter Pan,” she teased.
“Yeah, I guess it does, but that doesn’t make it any less true,” Destry insisted.
Emma mulled that over. She knew she wasn’t really miserable, just a little too dramatic most of the time. There were times she felt completely happy, and she hated to admit that a lot of those times involved Destry. But a lot had to do with Micah too.
Emma just wanted to find her perfect someone. She believed that if she could, her whole life would fall into place, all of the pieces fitting nicely together.
Could her life be complete with this boy in it, Emma wondered? She believed it could, but she wasn’t sure. Could her life be complete with Micah? She loved him, and he loved her back, but the talk with Gram, and with him earlier that day, had reminded her that flesh and blood had its advantages. Did she really need it though? Couldn’t she be happy with the way things were right now?
Micah made her feel all warm and safe on the inside. But she couldn’t deny that Destry made her feel things too, inside and out.
“So where are we going?” Emma wondered out loud, determined to keep it light, no more heavy thinking tonight.
“Well, I noticed that you had so much fun fishing today,” Destry gave her a sarcastic smile, “that I guessed you’d like to see something else I like doing.”
Emma shot him a horrified look.
“Don’t worry, it’s fun, and you don’t have to do anything but sit and watch.”
“And it’s something you like to do?” Emma questioned, still hesitant to go along.
“Yep, and I have a feeling you’re gonna love it!”
They weren’t too far down the dirt road when Destry made a small turn onto another road that led up the hill towards the place they'd gone earlier that day.
“We’re not going fishing in the dark are we?” Emma asked with hesitation. “You said I would just have to watch. I have a hard enough time walking in the woods when it’s light, there’s no way I’m trying it in the dark.”
“I told you, don’t worry. We aren’t even going to get out of the truck.”