He released a frustrated sigh as he leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes. “Can you just call me an idiot like the old days so I can be sufficiently sorry?”
Imogene’s laugh washed over him to sooth away the lingering rough edges before she informed him, “You are an idiot, but you’re my idiot.”
The familiar words from their younger days had his eyes opening and his head lolling to the side so he could see her in the dim lighting. “At least someone wants me,” he said, quietly before lifting his thumb to brush over her bottom lip. He heard the catch in her breath and her eyes widened, though he hesitated to close the gap between them. “I really am trying, Immy.”
She nodded, slightly. “I know you are,” she whispered, leaning the smallest bit toward him. “But you’re not the only one adjusting. It’s hard for all of us.”
He hesitated then asked, “Can I kiss you?”
Her breath caught again, and he could see her hands twisting together in her lap. “I don’t think that would be a good idea,” she finally whispered, though she didn’t lean away. “We shouldn’t get attached.”
“That wasn’t a no, though.”
“It wasn’t.”
Deciding to go out on a limb, Landon slid his hand down to curve over her jaw and tilt her head toward him as the other wrapped around her waist. “I’m going to kiss you,” he said with finality before tugging her forward to seal his lips against hers. A quiet moan escaped as her lips parted beneath his and her arms slid around his neck, tugging him closer despite the console between them.
The familiar spark that had always accompanied kissing Imogene burned in him as his hand sank back into her curls and his tongue swept into her mouth. Hers immediately met it while her blunt nails dug into the back of his neck, gently. He tugged slightly on her hair to tilt her head back to give him better access as he trailed his lips down her jaw then over her neck. An occasional nip would be given to her skin, but a tug on his hair had his mouth going back to hers without a single protest to tease and stroke that growing flame.
His hand at her waist slid under her shirt to encounter smooth skin, though he suddenly felt her pulling back and her hands planted on his chest to distance them. “Stop, Landon.” The words held a quiver as if she wasn’t confident about what she meant to say until she took a breath and continued, “I don’t want to just be a distraction for you.”
“You’re always a distraction,” he replied without breaking eye contact. He withdrew his hands from her and reluctantly put distance between them, but his lips still tasted like her and his body ached to resume what they’d started. “But you could never be just a distraction, Immy, then or now. You’re everything.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Following a restless night and a cup of cold coffee, Landon walked from the house where he’d grown up to the cabin that now belonged to his brother and the twins. He’d barely knocked on the door when it opened, though Eliana’s eyes were already rolling as she called, “Dad, you have a visitor!”
“Good morning to you, too,” he said, reaching out to ruffle her hair. “Nice rat’s den.”
An annoyed sound escaped as she batted his hand aside then headed back inside, leaving the door wide open. He scanned the cabin’s interior and realized it hadn’t changed much despite his lengthy absence aside from the lack of toys in the living room. His eyes were drawn to the cluster of pictures nearest the door and the multitude of new ones, though his eyes zeroed in on the one at the center that showed Charlie, Jane, and the twins who looked only a few years older than when he’d left. Jane’s smile as she hugged a twin on either side squeezed at his heart, Charlie’s hands on her shoulders and equally happy.
“Hey, I didn’t expect to see you this early.” Charlie’s arrival from the small hallway that led back to his room pulled Landon’s attention away from the pictures. He toweled off his damp, dark hair as he questioned, “You hungry? There’s leftover pancakes and bacon, if you are.”
“Did you finally learn to cook?” Landon joked as he headed into the kitchen. He glanced to the table where the leftovers waited then the sink where Elliot stood, washing dishes. “Morning, Elliot.”
Charlie shook his head. “Eliana used to make them when she stayed at the house with Mom and Riley so I let her have free run of the kitchen in the mornings,” he said, already beginning to pour coffee into a mug. One hand reached over to tug an earbud out of Elliot’s ear. “Say hi to your uncle.”
“Hi, Uncle.” Elliot grabbed a towel to wipe his soapy hands then turned and regarded him with less annoyance than Eliana often did. “Still here, huh? Make it a full month, and I might actually be impressed.”
Landon’s eyes narrowed as he recalled Alexis’ words when he returned and questioned, “Do you have a bet with someone about how long I’m going to stay?”
“I would never,” he said with a smirk before tossing the towel onto the counter. “But seriously, I need you to stay a full month. Dad, are El and I good to head out to meet the others?”
“Go ahead, but keep your phones on you, and don’t leave your sister unattended with any boys,” Charlie ordered, though Eliana’s scoff as she returned to the kitchen brought everyone’s attention to her. “El, don’t leave your brother unattended with any girls.”
Raising an eyebrow at those words, Landon accepted the plate from his brother and began to transfer pancakes onto it. “Where are you guys off to?” he asked, more to make conversation than anything as he added bacon. “The food smells great, Eliana.”
Unsurprisingly, Eliana ignored his words, but Elliot chimed in with, “The creek. We finally got old enough last year that Dad lets us go on our own. We’re growing up so fast.”
A laugh escaped at the solemn words before Charlie shooed them out the door with a final call that he loved them and to stay out of trouble. Allowing them a bit of space, Landon moved to get a fork then poured syrup onto the entire contents of his plate and settled into an empty chair at the table. He said a brief thanks when Charlie placed a mug of coffee beside his plate then sat down opposite him with his own mug.
“Sorry I didn’t tell you about Alexis’ extracurricular activities,” he began, hands curved around his coffee. “It’s not really something we advertise since that would make it harder for her to go unnoticed.”
“Doesn’t her working at the bar do that already?” Landon paused in eating to ask the question then added, “And are we really sold on this Bennett guy?”
Instead of arguing with him, Charlie abandoned his coffee to go into the living room then returned a few minutes later with a relatively thick black folder. He tossed it onto the table beside him.
“No one who frequents The Red Stag would be caught anywhere near Bordertown so it’s never been a concern, but you’ll find Snow’s background check in there,” he said with a gesture to the folder. “Read it for yourself, if you’re unconvinced.”
Setting his plate to the side, Landon pulled the folder closer and opened it up to find a photograph of the blonde man who had been with Alexis. The shot did show the top half of a police uniform and a badge number printed nearby. He glanced over the stats list and noted age, birthplace, and the information about him having gone into foster care before settling into a group home in his mid-teens where he’d stayed until aging out of the system. Other pages were flipped through, but Bennett Snow raised absolutely no alarms and seemed almost alarmingly normal.
“It’s a pretty boring read.” Charlie’s words seemed to echo his thoughts as he sipped his coffee.
Instead of arguing, he gave the last page a skim, then questioned, “What about all the no humans allowed rules of the packs? Everyone’s just okay with inviting a human into our business?”
“He isn’t in our business.” Air quotes were used on the last three words. “Any and all meetings are in town or at Matthew’s and Alexis has warned him off Bordertown so no one’s breaking the rules. I handle anything Snow related which lets Mom maintain her plausible deni
ability to Scott.”
The entire scenario sounded a little suspicious to him, and he couldn’t bring himself to believe his mother had trusted a human with so much. However, he did trust Charlie which kept him from asking the follow-up questions running through his head or how Alexis felt about potentially endangering her human friend.
“So where did Alexis find him?” Landon questioned instead, setting aside the folder to resume eating.
Charlie’s shoulders lifted in a shrug. “I’m not sure since all she ever says is they met while she was gone,” he said after a moment’s consideration. “I tried asking Snow once, and he said that he’d rather not talk about it which leads Matthew and I to believe he arrested her for something but lost a bet with her so no follow through on booking her.”
He couldn’t stop a snort or disagree with that assessment since, while Alexis didn’t engage in the same activities as Matthew, she wasn’t exactly the most law-abiding of citizens. He guessed it couldn’t be too serious if she’d convinced a cop to not only move to Worsham but remain her friend so he made a mental note to ask those questions later. For now, he’d have to accept that Snow could keep her safe outside of her own claws and teeth.
Finishing up the last couple bites of his food, he moved to the sink to wash off his plate. “What about Alexis’ actual intel from The Red Stag? Anything useful there?”
“Define useful.”
Despite his abrupt words, Charlie left the table again and returned with a red folder that he placed atop the black one. “Anti-wolf attitude aside, it’s really not that different from Bordertown,” he said, having returned to his seat. “They have a staff of about fifteen who rotate working days, all humans. Some of them are recognizable from high school or seeing them around, but no one who openly opposes our existence. A lot of the crowd remains the same which again, isn’t that different from Bordertown.”
Landon frowned as he abandoned the plate to the sink then moved back to the table, wiping his damp hands on the legs of his jeans. He drained the last of his coffee before picking up the red folder and began to flip through its pages. An entire page had been dedicated to the owner, a woman near Charlie’s age that he could vaguely remember from high school.
“Wasn’t Lisa Goodall on the color guard?” he questioned, tilting the folder toward his brother to show him the photo.
“Yeah, she and Jane were co-captains senior year,” Charlie said after a cursory glance. “She also had a lot of shit to say about us having kids so young. I’d say my kids are pretty damn awesome for being raised by a pair of dumb kids with less life experience than the average clown.”
Landon’s lips lifted into a smile at those words, though he paused in flipping through the folder to glance at his brother’s melancholy expression. He knew Jane hit a lot of emotional buttons, and he wanted to ask the questions he’d held back with his mother and Imogene when they’d mentioned her death.
He hesitated to ruin his brother’s mood then began, “About Jane-”
“Don’t.” Charlie growled the single word. “I don’t want to talk about it, okay? I know it’s been five years, and I should be over it, but I’m not. Jane was the love of my life, and I never in a million years thought I’d be raising the twins without her.”
Instead of saying a word, Landon reached out to lay a hand on his brother’s shoulder and squeeze. “I don’t think you should be over it,” he began, quietly and squeezed again until Charlie’s eyes met his. “What you and Jane had isn’t something to just get over, and I can only imagine what it’s like to feel you couldn’t protect her. I was going to say I wished I’d been here.”
Charlie nodded. “I do, too.”
He hesitated then asked, “Will you at least tell me what happened? I know the basics from Imogene that they were looking into rogues who’d settled into the territory, but that seemed more a job for the guard than an alpha.”
The silence grew between them, though just as he began to give up, Charlie said, “It was a guard duty, but Jeremiah and Tonya had just had their daughter so she volunteered to take his shifts for that month since you know how Jane was, don’t ask someone else to do what you aren’t willing to do yourself.”
Jane’s familiar words made him smile. “She did say that a lot.”
“It was just supposed to be checking things out,” he continued in a monotone as if there’d been no interruption. Shadows had shifted into the familiar brown of his eyes. “They were fresh off a run-in with hunters so fear was high and things escalated. Jane didn’t want to turn because she wouldn’t be able to talk except that just made her the first casualty and the others were trying for non-lethal takedowns. And they paid the price for it.”
Listening to the forlorn quality of his brother’s voice, the guilt for not being there crept back in, and Landon struggled to find words. He felt inadequate to comfort his brother and knew nothing could undo the loss of Jane, for any of them, or make up for the time she’d lost with him and the twins.
When the silence began to drag too long, he admitted, “Given Letty and some of the other Durand members come from the same group that killed her, I’m surprised you didn’t have more of an objection to them sticking around.”
Charlie sighed and stared into the depths of his coffee mug. “I had a lot of objections,” he finally said, eyes remaining downcast. “Mom had to call a recess on tribunal so we could speak in private, but she reminded me that Jane wouldn’t want everyone punished for the actions of a few. It helped the younger ones, like Letty, weren’t much older than Riley and Tyler. I was an asshole for most of those next two years, though.”
“As opposed to your sunny disposition now?” His joke earned a look far too much like their mother, but a little of the tension lessened in his brother’s shoulders before he questioned, “Is she buried out with Dad? I’d like to pay my respects, if you don’t mind.”
“Yeah, about two miles back behind the main house,” he said then tossed back the last of the coffee. “We can head out there right now, if you want. I was going to take her flowers anyway.”
Landon hesitated then gave a nod, deciding he had to face every part of the life he’d left behind which meant dealing with never seeing Jane in person again. He rinsed out coffee mugs while Charlie went to retrieve shoes plus the flowers that he’d apparently bought the night before then headed out the cabin’s only door. It was quiet out, though he didn’t find any compulsion to talk as he accompanied his brother up the road containing the cabins then behind the main house; however, he couldn’t help glancing toward the back deck despite expecting no one at the current hour.
The path to the burial ground hadn’t changed much in his absence, though he did notice stones had been put in to make going down it somewhat easier. Thankfully, it hadn’t rained recently so there was no mud to worry about, but he still felt a tightness in his chest as they moved deeper into the woods where the trees grew closer together.
The vice squeezing his chest tightened as he stepped from the last stone onto the smooth ground where a handful of crosses carved from wood were erected. Their grandparents, their father, and now Jane whose cross stood out as a vibrant yellow. His steps faltered a bit as he approached, though Charlie immediately went to work removing the flowers from their packaging and arranging them against the cross. He kissed his first two fingers before touching them to the smooth wood where her name had been carved alongside the life dates.
“I try to bring her flowers a couple times a month,” Charlie admitted as he pushed himself up and wiped his dirty hands on his legs. “So she knows I haven’t forgotten her.”
Landon stepped closer and felt less and less capable of pulling air into his lungs while he stared at the yellow cross. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here,” he said, quietly, unsure which of them he’d apologized to. “I missed so much, and I don’t even know how to make it up to any of you . . .”
Charlie’s hand settled on his shoulder and squeezed. “I was really pissed you left in the be
ginning, but Jane always said you deserved a life of your own.” He paused, eyes locked on the yellow cross, then continued, “She said being an alpha, running the pack, was my dream, and it wasn’t fair to force my dream on you.”
“It was never about you forcing me to do anything. It was Mom,” he said after a lengthy silence. “She was so proud of you and Jane, and it felt like I’d never be good enough for her. Why wasn't just being Landon enough?”
The familiar silence stretched between them before Charlie said, “That’s a conversation you need to have with Mom because I can’t speak for her. I always wished I had your confidence, though.”
“You mean, reckless disregard for the rules and customs of pack life?” His echo of their mother’s favorite phrase growing up caused a laugh before he added, “You seemed plenty confident about taking over the pack one day, about Jane, about being a teen parent, and everything else life threw your way.”
“Sometimes confidence is the best mask for insecurity,” Charlie replied before giving a follow-up squeeze to his shoulder. “But at some point, it has to stop being a mask and become how you really feel.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
“I feel like we can’t call it Tequila Tuesday on a Sunday.”
Imogene rolled her eyes at Letty’s words and took another sip from the extra-large frozen margarita in front of her. “There’s no law that says you can’t have tequila other days,” she pointed out, giving a pointed look to her. “Just accept I need Tequila Tuesday on a Sunday.”
Thankfully, Letty hadn’t pressured her about the demand for an early get-together, though she hadn’t missed the looks sent her way. She’d likely ask questions later, but for now, Imogene sipped her drink and waited for the pans of tamales to finish while Letty swept a tortilla chip through the seven layer dip they’d created minutes earlier.
“Fine, but we’re renaming this as Sunday Funday,” she informed her before crunching into the chip. “And I don’t think anyone else will make it on such short notice.”
Rule of Claw: Wolves of Worsham #1 Page 14