A few hours passed before a guard came to escort Lilidh back to Rob’s chambers. If her mother had an opinion, which from the fire in her eyes, she did, she never spoke about it. After a farewell hug, her mother followed another guard out. They were walking towards the stairway when Symon approached with his sister. If Lilidh backed a step away, she could not help it—she expected the worst. Ranald motioned for her to come along and she did, but she had a bad feeling about this.
Symon greeted her mother with a respectful bow and then stood at her side as Tyra engaged her in a conversation over some matter. As Lilidh left, Rob, Duncan and the others entered the hall to return to their encampment outside the walls. Before they climbed up the three flights of steps, something happened and the sounds of a scuffle or fight, yelling and cursing echoed up through the stairway.
Though she wanted to go back, Ranald took her by the arms and guided her, with force but not harm, the rest of the way. If he hastened her entrance into the bedchamber, it was without malice, and after warning the guard on duty to be alert, Ranald ran back down the stairs. She called out after she heard the bar drop, but the guard, someone she had not seen before, did not answer her.
Minutes passed like hours as she waited for some explanation and to learn if her mother was safe. Symon had done something, possibly something dangerous, most likely something stupid, which would cause more problems for Rob. She could not figure out if Symon wanted to destroy only Rob or the whole Matheson clan.
She stood by the window, staring out as the fires began to light up the forest outside the walls. Staying back in the shadows, she wondered if this was her last night with Rob. Walking to ease the tightness in her leg, she thought about how she felt about leaving him now. Maybe the talk about him with her mother had forced her to consider it more intensely than the scandalous, superficial reason she’d given her mother.
Regardless, she knew she would hurt deeply after she left him than she had when he left her. Though she’d like to think that this time for them had been only about pleasures of the flesh, her heart knew it had been more. And knew it could be more between them.
Yet he would not admit it or explain the whole of how the chasm had opened between them and their fathers. Oh, Rob knew more than he was saying and he was leaving something unspoken, but she did not know how to pry it from him. She almost had the feeling he was protecting her somehow, or thought he was.
Well, she thought as she pushed away all the questions and thought about the coming night, she would take the hours she had left with him. And she would treasure every last moment.
Chapter Twenty-One
Dougal argued with him, just as he expected, but he gave in and accompanied Rob to his chambers where Lilidh waited. Did she have any idea of the complete catastrophe he’d barely managed to avoid in the hall? Now, his friend trudged up the stairs and along the corridor with him, silent except for an occasional curse aimed at him.
Daft, imbecile, stupid and bedamned seemed to be among the ones he favoured for now. It would have been funny, except for the gravity of the whole situation.
Once more Symon had stepped in and caused trouble. This time, keeping Lady MacLerie from leaving nearly resulted in several deaths. Symon’s own was only prevented by his unconscious condition—and the chains that bound him in a small room near the kitchens. Rob could take no more chances by leaving him free. Now Lilidh’s mother resided with her maid, under guard, until Rob could speak to Duncan in the morning and clear this up. Hopefully, he would find a way to solve the matter of Lilidh MacLerie.
Now he stood before his bedchamber door, not knowing what to expect inside. Had she seen the dagger in her mother’s side? Did she hear Symon’s threats? Or had Ranald already removed her from it? Dougal whispered something about changing his mind, so Rob lifted the latch and entered alone.
She stood by the window, barely visible in the shadows, staring out into the forest. He walked to her side and watched the flickering lights of the campfires glowing in the night’s darkness. He reached up and put his hands on her shoulders, pulling her against him and inhaling the scent of her … while he could.
‘What happened, Rob?’ she asked. He felt her inhale and hold a breath while waiting for him to answer. He let out the one he’d been holding.
‘Symon took your mother prisoner at knifepoint.’ There really was no way of saying it gently. ‘She is well and I’ve sent word that she will be returned to your cousins on the morrow,’ he added.
‘May I see her?’ she asked.
‘Not now. Things have only just settled down. Fear not, she is comfortable and has not been hurt.’
She turned to him and searched his face. ‘But you have been hurt.’ Lilidh reached up and touched the edge of his jaw where Symon had managed to get a punch in before being subdued.
‘I need to speak to you about something important, Lilidh,’ he began. ‘This becomes more dangerous with each day and … I worry about what will happen to you if this ends badly for me.’
‘Rob, you will get us through this, you promised,’ she said, stroking his arm now. He smiled at her determination and her faith, especially when his was failing him.
‘Dougal is waiting outside. He will be our witness.’
The frown lay across her brow and forehead at his words. He was mucking this up. ‘We have had relations. There might be a consequence.’
She shook her head at his words. Then she realised of what he spoke. ‘Why do we need a witness?’
‘I would handfast with you in the old ways so that you have the protection of my name if anything happens to me. Dougal has sworn to keep this a secret between us, unless you need to use it.’
‘You think you are going to die.’
There were many possibilities, but with the way that he was being undermined, opposed and ignored, most of them were not good outcomes. If she was with child, handfasting would give her some legal protections. If not, they could simply choose to ignore it. He would not hold her to the ‘year and a day’ tenet and keep her from moving on with her life.
‘Things have escalated. If whoever is trying to kill me within the clan does not succeed, there is every possibility that your father will once he hears about our violation in the truce and hospitality we offered.’ Rob could still not believe Symon’s actions. Once again, his cousin’s actions were indefensible.
‘But you did not—’ she began. He touched his finger to her lips.
‘It matters not, Lilidh. I am laird. I am responsible.’
The sound of shuffling feet and a man not trying to be discreet interrupted them. Dougal would leave soon if he did not open the door.
‘Will you, Lilidh? Will you accept the protection I offer and handfast with me?’
He wanted nothing more than to tell her of the love in his heart for her, but that would make this something more serious, more permanent, and he could not offer her that.
Tears filled her beautiful green eyes then and they trickled down her cheeks when she nodded. He pulled a length of plaid from the bed and wrapped it around her shoulders and then opened the door to let Dougal in.
‘My lady,’ Dougal said, bowing to her. ‘A strange business in the middle of the night.’
Rob put his arm around Lilidh’s shoulders and took her left hand in his. Clearing his throat, he tried to say the right words so that they were bound but not so tightly that she could not escape this as soon as she was safe.
‘Lilidh MacLerie, I take you as my wife, before this witness, and pledge that you have the protection of my name and this vow for a year and a day,’ he said. Dougal handed him a strip of their clan’s plaid and he wrapped it around their joined hands. Then he waited for her to say the words.
Her voice came out as a whisper, soft and gentle, as she spoke, her eyes staring into his as she uttered the words of joining.
‘Rob Matheson, I take you as my husband, before this witness, and pledge my faithfulness to you and to this vow for a year and a day.’
She wrapped the plaid strip once more around their hands and looked up at him. Rob leaned down and kissed her mouth to seal the vows.
‘You are both fools and I have witnessed it,’ Dougal said, cursing again before he walked away towards the door.
‘Thank you, Dougal,’ Rob offered, but Dougal left without stopping or looking back.
Rob poured himself some whisky and filled a cup with wine for Lilidh, handing it to her while trying to gauge her reaction to the last few minutes. She walked over and sat on the long bench where she’d sat with her mother earlier.
Dazed and confused. Lovely and exhausted. His wife and the love of his heart.
But that was only temporary and, once any danger was over for her, it would be over, as well.
‘What happened at your meeting with Duncan? Did something there cause Symon to act this way?’
‘Lilidh, I cannot understand him at all. At times he is reasonable.’ At her expression—one of complete disbelief—he laughed and nodded. ‘No, truly, sometimes he is quite rational. Then he acts like this, as he did when he kidnapped you, and I am left wondering if he is insane.’ He let out a breath. ‘And I got the sense that Duncan is delaying. This is not something that should take days of negotiating, but he seems to treat it as such.’
‘What good would a delay do, Rob?’ she asked, as he sat down next to her and took her hand in his.
He finished his whisky and shook his head. ‘It is just a feeling. More than that, I have seen him do this before. He is waiting.’ Putting his cup down, he took in the dark circles under her eyes and her pale face and smiled. ‘Come. Let us get some rest so that we can face the morrow.’
She allowed him to lead her to the bed. He tugged the covers loose and held them back for her. His intentions to sleep, just sleep and allow her to, as well, were ruined when she lifted her shift off before climbing in. His body was ready before he reached the other side of the bed.
He tried to take no notice of the call of her passion to his as he placed his weapons on the floor and in the mattress, but by the time he lay at her side, she was impossible to ignore.
She would always be impossible to ignore.
Hell, if he could have, it would have prevented most all of the problems they now faced.
In spite of the willingness of his flesh, he just wanted to hold her this night. To hold her close for this last night.
He fell asleep in minutes, wrapped around her, their bodies entwined. But he woke to find her touching him, skimming her fingers over his skin with her eyes closed as though trying to see him through her touch. Then she opened her eyes and her body and took him inside of her.
This time was unlike any of those before. This joining was slow and easy and left him feeling complete and empty at the same time.
When the first light of dawn streamed through his window and the sounds of hell arriving at his gate woke them, he knew it was over. The only question was whether or not he would live to see another day.
As he looked out from the battlements at the sea of newly arrived MacLeries and other warriors who were pledged to them, Rob wished someone had summoned the MacKenzies to their side.
They dressed without a word and he took Lilidh down to the chamber where her mother and maid were before gathering with his men and facing the enemy.
Still stunned over the events of the night, Lilidh woke next to Rob with a profound sadness in her heart. Their last time together, something she never thought would ever happen at all, was over and now she would have to face living her life without him. She understood that nothing could or would come of the vows they’d spoken, but that he thought of her safety touched her deeply.
Now, as she walked at his side towards the chamber where her mother was being held, she could not help it if her hand lingered in his grasp, or if she stood too close to him. When the door opened, Rob informed them of his plans.
‘Lady MacLerie, if you would follow me now, I’ll take you back to your men.’
‘I am taking my daughter with me,’ she demanded. Standing up to Rob was most likely no problem for the woman who had tamed the Beast.
‘You will take the maid with you,’ he said. Calling out to a few men in the corridor, Rob gave orders that Isla was to be released along with her mother.
A flurry of activity followed as the men carried Isla out of the keep and Rob began to leave, escorting her mother away.
‘Remain here until I call for you,’ he said, the lover disappearing as the commander and chief were needed.
‘Rob,’ she said. There were so many things she needed to say to him.
‘I will send for you,’ he whispered as he pulled the door closed.
And then he was gone.
Chapter Twenty-Two
With his men behind him, Rob led Jocelyn towards the gates.
When Connor arrived this morn, Rob understood why Duncan was delaying—either he knew or suspected that Connor would not stand back and let anyone handle it for him. In a way, though the danger was high, he would finally speak to Connor for the first time in more than four years. If he had doubted it, Connor’s voice yelling out his name over his wall confirmed it.
Dougal held the lady in place behind Rob and Rob nodded for one of the wooden-gate doors to be opened. With guards in position to both defend it and ready to close it immediately if the need arose, Rob walked forwards and found Connor standing on the other side of it.
‘Laird Matheson,’ he said in the booming voice that spread fear and terror in those who opposed him, ‘you have something of mine.’
Rob nodded and Dougal walked Jocelyn forwards. Connor drew his sword, but Rob only placed his hand on his, leaving it in the scabbard for now. Both of them cursed him under their breaths as they passed him. Connor reached out and grabbed Jocelyn, pulling her roughly to him and kissing her before they spoke in whispers. A moment later, Jocelyn sent him a dark glare and walked into the throng of MacLerie warriors.
‘And my daughter,’ Connor called out once more. When Rob did not react, the Beast of the Highlands continued. ‘I will put this keep to the torch and tear it down stone by stone if you do not return my daughter now.’ He advanced a few paces until he stood but inches from the entrance—outside the wall but not by much.
Try as he might, when confronted by the man who was more father to him than his own had been and while he looked at the man who had had as much a hand in destroying Lilidh’s spirit and life as he himself had, Rob could not stop himself. Although he’d sworn that his clan’s needs came first, his need for vengeance or absolution sparked the anger in his blood and he could not simply acquiesce to his mentor now. He stepped closer and spoke in a lower voice so that none would hear it but Connor.
‘I think not. For if you harm one Matheson this day, your beloved daughter will discover your part in what played out four years ago.’
A bleak expression entered Connor’s eyes and was gone in a second. ‘You have not told her?’ he asked.
‘I will let her think what she might, as long as you pay the gold as demanded and leave.’
‘Gold?’ Connor laughed. ‘So this is more about your greediness and less about your honour, as I suspected.’ Rob’s hand tightened on the pommel of his sword and he fought not to pull it free and strike.
‘And there is one more condition,’ Rob added.
‘Another?’ Connor asked. ‘I am not certain you are in a position to make any more demands.’
‘I am. I hold your daughter and you want her kept in ignorance of the way you forced me to disavow her. You do not want her to know that you demanded I humiliate her so that there was no hope of a future together. You do not want Jocelyn to know either. And they will unless you seem to find an honourable way to end this now.’
When Connor let out a breath, he looked much older than Rob had ever realised. And more vulnerable. ‘You will seek no retribution against my clan for this incident. When you leave, when Lilidh leaves, it is over between us.’
Someh
ow Rob knew he would accept. Under it all, this beast of a man loved his wife and his daughter and would give anything to protect them. And if it was from the truth of his failings or from the truth of his past actions in this matter, Connor would do it. Rob began to walk away, intending to get Lilidh himself, when Connor delivered a blow as only he could.
‘I have a condition as well, Matheson.’
The air thick with foreboding, Rob faced Lilidh’s father and waited to hear it.
‘You must end it completely with her. As you did before. I will not have her pining away, thinking something will come of this.’
Rob closed his eyes for a moment, trying to ignore the screaming in his heart and soul. If he was going to be laird here, if he was going to be worthy enough to be chief and command the respect and loyalty of his kin, then he must be loyal to them. If he did as Connor demanded, his clan would be left unmolested and able to ally themselves elsewhere. If he did not, Connor would return and destroy them later.
If he was going to be the leader he must be, he had to let her go completely.
Again.
Turning away, he began walking back to the keep. Dougal followed him, whispering furiously, but Rob waved him off. He walked through the silent hall and the kitchens to the chamber where she waited for him. Opening the door, he prepared to do something he’d regret until his last breath to the woman he loved.
‘Lilidh, your father waits for you at the gates,’ he said. ‘Your things are already there.’
She began shaking her head at him. ‘Rob, let me speak to him. This can be worked out. You were willing to handfast with me and I am certain he will accept—’
At the Highlander's Mercy Page 18