by C. A Ellis
I know she wouldn’t have hesitated; he was the only man for her. As much as I first had my reservations, they had proven time and time again they were made for each other. Then once Luke would have placed this magnificent ring on Lizzy’s finger, I know she would’ve jumped and squealed in excitement, probably before jumping all over Lucas. My thoughts then drift to where he would have proposed—at the opera, in the square where everyone could see, at dinner in private, where it was just the two of them—who knows? Who will ever know? I think sadly.
I look at Lucas and speak to him. “Look at you lying there, all peaceful and serene, although admittedly, a bit battered. Who knew that you had this little gem up your sleeve? Fucking hell, Lucas! I know how much you love her, and even with all your bravado, I think deep down you need her as much as she needs you. In fact, I know you do—you must to even contemplate marriage.”
I start to laugh until it borders on hysteria at the absurdity and damn unfairness of this totally unjust situation. “Lucas fucking Castle is going to take himself off the market and is going to get hitched.” Well…was, I think to myself. “I mean, who would bloody well believe it, Lucas, eh?” I’m shouting a bit now; anger’s kicking in because my girl has lost the man of her dreams, her prince charming and most importantly of all, she’s lost the ‘happily ever after’ she so bloody well deserved, and it’s just not fair.
There are bad people in this world, but Lizzy’s one of the best—the best of the best, in fact—and yet all this shit has happened to her. To top it all off—the icing on the bloody cake—is I have now lost her, my girl, my best friend…gone.
This was more me; I can cope with the anger. I don’t cry—well, I didn’t, but I can feel the large tears dripping down off the tip of my nose again as the anger subsides when I look down at the ring I’m holding.
“I can’t believe you were going to ask her to marry you, Lucas. She would have been so happy, and even with all her insecurities, she would have said yes because her insecurities paled in significance when she was with you. Sometimes it was like they almost didn’t exist at all. She even exuded an air of confidence around you, which was fantastic to see. Yep, she would have definitely said yes…yelled it from the highest rooftops if she could,” I tell him as I sniff and wipe my nose with the back of my hand.
Just then I feel something on my leg; it feels like a light comforting squeeze. I jump up and glare at Lucas. Did I just imagine that, or did he just move? His hand is lying flat on the bed. I didn’t just imagine it—I know I didn’t! I pick his hand up, holding it between mine.
“Lucas! Come on!” I say, “Show me that I didn’t just imagine you moved.” I think back to what I was talking about when I felt the movement. “I know you were going to ask her to marry you! I’ve got the ring Lucas! They must have found the ring at the crash site, and we’ve got it back! Lizzy would have said yes; I know she would have!” I’m rambling excitedly now as I think of anything that will provoke some movement out of him.
“Come on, Lucas, you’re stronger than some fucking coma medication, and you’re stronger than any lame injuries. So come on, move dammit!” I shout the last part, but I’m tired and I’m desperate, and then I’m talking and weeping. “Please, Lucas, I beg you—wake up, move, just do something. I need you, Lucas! Lizzy needs you, please! Can you hear me? She needs us, Lucas. Our girl needs us! She’s gone; she thinks you’re dying, so show her you’re not going to. Our girl loves you so much, so show her how much you love her. Prove your love to her, Lucas. For Christ’s sake, Lucas, prove it!” I scream as I throw myself down on the bed next to him with heart-wrenching sobs pouring out of me in sheer desperation. I want…no, I need my best friend back, and I know the one person who would fight tooth and nail for her like I will—the one person who I know would use all his resources to find her—is the same person laying here unconscious, and suddenly I feel the fight leave me, and I know I am beaten.
I lay on Luke’s bed sobbing at my loss, and that’s when I feel it—a hand cups the back of my head. I think the nurse must’ve heard my outburst and has either come in to comfort me, or to throw me out. I slowly start to look up; I silently hope that it’s not the nurse finding me in this state. I catch myself hoping it’s Cole; after yesterday and talking with him, I think we have more of an understanding of each other, and I’d want nothing more at this moment than to fall into his arms—to give him comfort, and to be comforted in return. I look up, and there is no nurse, but unfortunately, there is no Cole either. But then I feel a hand cup my face, and as my mouth opens in shock, I look at Lucas’s hand. My heart starts pounding as I follow his arm up to his face. And then I want to scream with joy, as I am looking into piercing blue eyes and see he’s slightly nodding at me, like he’s conveying to me through his eyes that everything is going to be okay.
“You’re awake,” I whisper, and then I jump up and scream, “He’s awake!” I run out the door to the nurse’s station. “He’s awake! He moved and opened his eyes! That’s good, right?” I’m still shouting and tripping over my words.
“Shush, keep it down. We have extremely sick patients here. Let’s go in and have a look at Mr. Castle and see what’s happening, shall we?” the nurse asks calmly, trying to calm me down. She walks ahead of me into his room and I scuttle behind, peering over her shoulder to see what she’s seeing. As we enter, Lucas’s eyes are closed and his hands are still, although one of them has moved from flat on the bed like it had been before after he touched me, to now laying across his stomach—so at least in my mind, I know he did move and I’m not going loopy.
The nurse calls, “Mr. Castle?” She waits, but we hear nothing. “Lucas?” she tries again, but still, there’s nothing. She doesn’t look perturbed though; she turns toward the equipment and does a print out. She looks pleased, so that’s a good sign. “Well, Miss…” the nurse prompts me to answer with my surname, clearly guessing I’m not Lucas’s sister. My God, I think, formalities at a time like this, really? “Just call me Katy,” I say.
“Well, Katy, there has definitely been some brain activity, so you didn’t imagine it. There could well have been movement.” She smiles at me and looks down, and that’s when I realise I’m still holding the ring box in my hand.
“May I?” she asks. I don’t answer; I just open the box.
“Wow,” is her only response.
Wow, indeed, I think as I look at the ring for a second time.
“Are you the lucky recipient of this gorgeous ring, Katy?” the nurse asks. I shake my head, but before I can say anything, the nurse continues, “Oh, please, dear Lord, tell me it isn’t that awful troll lady that was in here earlier, because if it is, I will have a totally different view of Mr. Castle.” I giggle and the nurse continues. “I don’t want to speak out of turn, but even battered and in a coma, Mr. Castle is quite frankly the most handsome man we’ve ever had in this ward—or this hospital even—and as concerned as we are for all of our patients, all the nurses have been going slightly potty over our Lucas here. They have been coming up from other wards to see how he’s doing, and to see if there have been any improvements. I mean, she is a beauty—there’s no denying that—but if he’s with, or is even contemplating marrying that foul-tempered, rude—”
I interrupt her before she finishes that sentence, as I have the feeling that she might regret it, and I laugh, saying, “No, I am not the lucky lady, but then neither is the beautiful ice queen. Although, apparently he did date her at some point in the past.” We both grimace at my statement and then laugh.
“No, the recipient of this ring,” I say as I look at it, “is much more worthy of it than the ice queen or even my good self. She truly is a one-in-a-million kind of girl…who totally deserves this ring and the man behind it.”
“Lizzy,” I hear whispered.
I look up from admiring the ring. “How do you know her name?” I ask her, sounding confused because I know I hadn’t mentioned it to her when I described Lizzy to the nurse when I fi
rst arrived. “I didn’t say it,” she whispers as we both turn to look at Lucas; his piercing blue eyes staring straight back at us is a truly welcome sight.
“It’s Lizzy. It’s always been Lizzy. She’s my forever, you know,” he mutters before his eyes close again.
The nurse looks at me, her eyes bright. “I’ll go and get Mr. Castle’s consultant.” And with that, she bolts out the door. I wait with Lucas until Mr. Matlock arrives; he totally ignores me while he looks at all the paperwork and checks all of Lucas’s vitals.
“Well, it looks like the miracle we were all waiting for may well have taken place,” he says to me gruffly.
“Lucas is going to be okay?” I ask in a whisper, almost not daring to speak it out loud.
“Well, he’s not out of the woods yet, but the initial signs are good. I will stop the medication that’s keeping him in the coma, as the brain seems to be healing itself now, which is obviously a good sign. When he is fully conscious from the coma we will know more, but the fact that he has moved a few times now—and spoken quite coherently, as my nurse tells me—it looks to me like brain and mobility-wise he could make a full recovery. He will still need time to recover from his cuts and bruises, and also from the surgery—not to mention the mental scars he might bear, due to this horrific accident—but all-in-all, the future looks pretty bright for Mr. Castle. He will go down shortly for some more tests to confirm my findings, but I’m pretty sure they will all be conclusive to what I’ve told you. I’ve been doing this many years, and sometimes I think too many, but on days like this, it makes it all worthwhile.”
I then get what I think is the nearest thing to a smile Mr. Matlock has ever given as he walks past me and out the door. I smile and look at Lucas as I go up to him and place the ring box in his hand, and although he doesn’t open his eyes again, he clasps the box like his life depends on it. “Come on, Lucas, you need a quick recovery here so we can go and find our girl.” Although it will be quite a task to find her…if we ever do. What I do know is that both Lucas and I will do everything in our power to find the girl we both need in our lives and bring her home. And with the first positive thought I’ve had in two days, I leave to go and phone Cole to tell him the good news.
“Hey, Katy,” Cole answers the phone, sounding so sad and exhausted. “Don’t ‘Hey, Katy’ me, Cole. Get your arse to the hospital now! Your big brother wants to see you,” I say with a smile in my voice, which Cole clearly doesn’t notice.
Cole speaks erratically, “I’m coming right now; what does Smyth need? Is it bad? Has he called Mum and Dad?”
“Cole, calm down. Yes, you do need to get your mum and dad down here, and call Smyth too,” I say through my grin, but then hear a confused “Eh?” from Cole’s end, and I realise that in my excitement, I’m making a complete hash of delivering what should be fantastic news. “It’s your other big brother that wants to see you. Lucas is awake, Cole!” I scream.
I hear nothing—the sound of someone in complete and utter shock. “Cole?” I question, wondering if he’s still there. A mouse-like voice answers me, and certainly a voice I have never heard out of Cole Castle. “Katy, is this for real? Is Lucas really awake? He’s not dead?”
“No, he’s awake and waiting to see you,” I explain. I hear a choked sob at the end of the line.
“When I saw it was you calling, I’d already assumed the worst and that Lucas was d-d-dea—” I can hear in Cole’s voice that he can’t even bear to finish the end of his sentence, thinking what could have been.
When he speaks next, his voice is strong, more like the Cole we all know and love, and I imagine him pulling himself together, straightening his muscular back and probably cursing himself for acting like such a pussy. “I’m on my way. I’ll call Mum, Dad and Smyth on the way. See you soon, beautiful.” And with that, the line goes dead.
Chapter Sixteen – Katy
Lucas has gone for his tests and scans, and I’m just thinking about Cole calling me beautiful, and how it’s affected me. I’m sure to him it had just been said in passing, as I don’t think he would be using pickup lines during this anxious time. Then again, this is Cole we’re talking about, so who knows? I’m still dwelling on this when the Castle clan erupts through the door, and they are all practically bouncing off the walls to see Lucas. I’m watching them arrive, grinning like an idiot, and suddenly I feel so emotional, I can’t speak as I think of the last time we were together, and the dreadful news we all had to endure.
Cole must realise it as he walks straight up and wraps his arms around me. This guy can read me like a book. I feel one hand on my back and one on my head pulling me into him, and for the first time in my life with a guy, it feels like coming home. I lean comfortably into him as I wrap my arms around his middle and inhale his magnificent scent, which is clearly intoxicating, because as we pull apart I can barely breathe, let alone speak.
“So where is the big guy?” Cole questions, and then feigning seriousness, he holds his hand up and continues, “Don’t tell me—he’s rushed off for a meeting.” I giggle, and in my head I wonder where that girly giggle had just come from. I’m sure I’ve never done that before.
“No, silly, they’ve taken him off for some tests and scans to confirm all is looking good.” Oh, pu-lease, I think, I’m getting on my own nerves now, sounding like a schoolgirl. It must be the emotions of the situation or something. I pull myself together and open the door before I ask them all to step into Lucas’s room, as I need to share some information with them. Again, as if reading my mind, Cole pipes up with, “Where’s Lizzy?” as we enter the room.
“I don’t know,” I say seriously, as four pairs of confused eyes land on me.
“What do you mean you don’t know? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? You girls are attached at the hip.” Cole sniggers. I glare at Cole. Okay. Moment over. I’m angry with him now, with his amazing good looks but totally condescending attitude.
“Yes, for your information, I do know that it sounds ridiculous, but it’s a fact. She’s gone, and I wish I did, but I don’t know where she is!” I scream the last part in his face. I hate it when I lose control; this is my ugly side.
Cole opens his mouth to speak, but Mrs. Castle pulls him aside and steps up in front of me, taking both my hands in hers. “What exactly do you mean, dear?” I can’t speak, as I know I will cry; it always comes after the anger—the tears of frustration—so instead, I hand her my letter, the one Lizzy had written. She reads it whilst her husband holds onto her petite shoulder, reading it along with her.
“I don’t know what to say,” she mumbles, confused. She hands the letter to Smyth and Cole to read.
“Lizzy’s just gone; she didn’t even wait to see if Lucas would be okay, pull through?” Cole’s voice was back to a whisper, like it was incredulous that someone would do such a thing.
“Don’t you dare judge her, Cole. She’s been through enough shit in her life. Don’t you understand what Lucas must mean to her, for her to do something this crazy at the thought of losing him? And let’s face it, the doctor practically told us there wasn’t a hope in the world of saving him, and Lizzy isn’t one to believe in miracles and happy endings—not after what she’s been through. She would have clung to all the awful words and scenarios that the doctor gave us,” I say all this while barely taking a breath, because at this moment, I am crazy mad at Cole. And yes, I most certainly will defend Lizzy and her actions until there is no fight left in me.
“I’m sorry,” Cole concedes, “I’m just shocked and surprised; that’s all.”
I nod my head at him, not daring to speak at the moment. The nurse interrupts our awkward silence by asking us all to leave for about an hour. She explains Lucas is being brought back up, but the doctor wants to see him alone, and then they want to get him settled and rested before he has any visitors.
We walk down to the hospital café in silence. Once there, we all grab a cup of tea and a slice of cake. It’s amazing at times like this how t
otally British we become. When we’re all seated and everyone’s deep in their own thoughts, I pipe up to no one in particular, “He was going to marry her, you know?”
Everyone looks at me. “You don’t know that,” Cole answers. “Yes, they were extremely close, and possibly in love even, but marriage and Lucas? I don’t see it.”
I laugh out loud. “Possibly in love? Are you blind, Cole? Anyone can see that they are besotted with each other, and anyway, I know for a fact that he was going to ask her because I found the ring he was going to propose with. It’s in his room; the police dropped all his belongings off and it was with them. Apparently, they found it in or near the wreckage of his car.” I’m almost gloating now with all the information I realise I possess.
“Wow, I can’t believe it. I never thought I’d see the day,” Cole says as he shakes his head in disbelief.
“Looks like you won’t…if we don’t find Lizzy,” I say as a sad matter-of-fact. Their mum keeps checking her watch and I smile at her; I know how desperate she is to see her boy.
When we finish our drinks, we make our way back up to Lucas’s room. The nurse gives us the nod that it’s now okay to enter. Jean, their mum, peers around the door first to see if he’s awake; he obviously is, as she trots straight over to give him a gentle cuddle, afraid of inflicting any more pain on him.
“Oh, my baby,” I hear her say, and tears sting my eyes as I hear her continue, “I thought we’d lost you. I don’t know what I would do without any of my boys in my life.” Lucas doesn’t reply, he just hugs her back with all the strength he can muster, which at the moment probably isn’t much.
Jean sits back, not letting go of his hands for a second as his dad walks over and kisses the top of his head. “It’s good to have you back, son.” I see Lucas smile at his father, but he still says nothing; it’s like he’s just taking all these precious moments in.
I then see Lucas look over to Smyth, who just smiles and nods at him like they are conversing without words. As Lucas’s eyes turn to Cole, I notice that Cole’s head is leaning to the side as he looks back at Lucas like he’s mulling something over in his head—like he has something to say, but doesn’t know how to say it—but then, in good old-fashion Cole style, he blurts out, “So it’s a miracle that you’re alive bro’. First, you have a horrific car accident and nearly die, and then Lizzy fucks off and leaves you just when you were planning to ask her to marry you. All-in-all, it’s not been a good few days for you, mate, has it?”