by Lauren Dane
Rachel’s expression was one of affection. “I’m lucky to have her. And you were right to demand I protect her from them.”
“How can they know her so little? What happened to make them this way to her and not you?”
Rachel sighed, clearly searching for words before she continued. “I wish I knew. I’ve asked myself that over and over. There’s been a difference pretty much as long as I can remember. I’ve tried to talk to them about it. They claim there’s nothing wrong. It turns into a fight and I’ve been too selfish to want to give them any energy on that. It’s my fault, I know. I was so willfully ignorant not to see it had gotten as bad as it is now.”
Jesus, these two smart women took on so much responsibility for things they had nothing to do with. “Stop letting them do this to you through her and her through you. They keep you exhausted. It has to end for everyone’s sake.”
“If you’re done talking about me, I’m coming back into the room,” Maybe called out as she padded down the hall, face bare of makeup, hair still wet from her shower.
Before she could ask where the food was, the doorbell rang and he jogged off to handle it, glad to have had the chance to clear the air with Rachel.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
MAYBE BLEARILY BRUSHED her teeth. She and Rachel were due to have brunch with the Orlovs within the hour. Living next door to them helped the commute though.
Alexsei had already been up and over there for an hour probably. They’d gone to church first so she’d join them upon their return.
Rachel came in, handing a black lacquer tube of lipstick over. “Thanks for the loaner.”
Her sister wore a pretty wine-colored sweater with gray trousers. Her boots matched the color of the sweater. Normally Rachel wore jeans and tanks or T-shirts. Seeing her get gussied up reminded Maybe that Rachel used to dress like this for work pretty much daily.
“You look fab,” she told Rachel.
“Thanks. You too. I’m so hungry I’m tempted to just have a piece of toast before we go over there.”
Maybe laughed. “Feeling lucky, punk? She’ll know it because she’s spooky that way. She’ll know you cheated on her brunch with toast. I wouldn’t want to be you. Toast traitor.”
Rachel snorted. “You’re right. She’ll know. Okay. Fine. But I’m eating a handful of peanuts instead.”
They headed over after their illicit peanuts, early enough to help if needed, not so early they’d only be underfoot.
Maybe saw the Mohawk first and realized Gregori and Wren must have returned from their trip. It hadn’t mattered because Alexsei had been sleeping over pretty much nightly since before Christmas.
Inside it was a riot of noise. A thousand different good smells painted the air. Alexsei caught sight of them and headed over.
Irena grabbed Rachel, telling her to chop celery, but before Maybe got commandeered too, he took her by the waist and spun her, teasing his aunt in Russian.
Laughing, Irena swatted him with her towel and stalked off, ordering everyone else to various stations but let Maybe remain with him.
“She’s going to be mad at me now,” Maybe told him with mock seriousness.
“It’s clearly my fault. She’ll blame me, and that’ll be all right because she adores me,” he told her, lips at her ear. “I’m a rogue.” He swayed with her, dancing slow and close.
“Have you been drinking already?” She looked him over and then kissed him quick.
He laughed, easy and sexy, and it revved her up even more.
“Pasha had us all out to the backyard. He makes some very strong stuff, I’ll say that. They’re still out there if you want to go say hi.”
Maybe shook her head. “No way. I tried some of that at Seth’s birthday dinner. It was like drinking fire. Or paint thinner. Not that I drink either. But you know what I mean.”
“God help me, I do understand, yes.”
The older dudes usually retreated to the shed where Pasha kept all his doodads and tools. It’s also where he kept the home brew he and his buddies liked to sip on the weekends and during family gatherings.
Sometimes one of them would have a mandolin or some other stringed instrument. Those tended to come out toward the end of the event, when they would all sing loud with mediocre accuracy, but a lot of passion.
She loved the bawdy humor they shared in the songs and the way they teased one another. Irena indulged them all too. Pretended to be disapproving but made them snacks and listened to all their stories over and over like she’d never heard them before.
A softie, just like her nephew.
Alexsei twirled her and the world spun like her heart before pulling her back to his body as The Beach Boys began to play in the background. “Don’t Worry, Baby.” One of Maybe’s favorites.
He slow danced with her a little and she let herself fall into it, loving the way he felt. The way he smelled. The way he was soft and sweet just for her. “That will be me someday in the shed, drunk and singing love songs in Russian, zajka. Will you still love me when I’m that old?”
God. He was unbelievably adorable when he was drunk like this.
“If you have tufts of hair in your ears like your uncle, I reserve the right to trim it,” she told him seriously. “And if I have a black hair on my neck and I don’t see it, you have to tell me. But in a nice way so I won’t be mortified.”
He chuckled and the fact that she loved him hit her. If she hadn’t been in his arms, she might have wobbled a little.
She hoped being in love didn’t mean she’d constantly be confused and slightly nauseated though.
She burrowed in until the song ended and the wooziness had passed, replaced by certainty.
“There’s already food out,” he said in her ear. And she loved him more because he knew how much she loved to get her brunch on. “I don’t mind slow dancing with you for hours. But I thought you might be hungry.”
Even with her stomach growling over those few peanuts, she let herself sway with him for several moments longer because it felt so right.
He kissed the top of her head when she stepped back, a sweet, nearly goofy smile on his face. A happy sigh escaped and she grabbed his hand, tugging him in the direction of the dining room before she told him she loved him right in the middle of his aunt’s house.
Naturally, Rada sat with Evie and some others at the table.
Maybe smiled and said hello. She quite liked everyone in the room except Rada so she would just pretend she was a chair instead of Alexsei’s ex. Which amused her so much she actually felt a lot better as she grabbed a few little sandwich things and joined Alexsei where he’d already saved her a place at the far end of the table from Rada.
People came and went to eat and visit a bit and then moved along. Maybe enjoyed a cup of tea and the story Vic told her about the drive over to the church earlier that morning when his mother had dealt with a goose that stubbornly wouldn’t get out of the road and they couldn’t get around it.
It was lovely and normal and made her feel very much at home.
Then Rada had to go and ruin it when she called out to Alexsei.
“Alyosha, why don’t you come over here to visit,” she said with a flutter of her lashes.
And if it had been the way she spoke to anyone else, even her normal sort of voice that Maybe hated, but had to admit was perfectly fine, it would have been easy to let go.
But Rada played it up. Bitch wanted to be provocative thinking Maybe was a doormat. Ha.
“Knock it off, Rada,” he told her. Which was good for him because she wouldn’t have to get mad over that.
Maybe took a roll from Alexsei’s plate and threw it, hard, at Rada’s head, where it landed with the accuracy of a gal who’d played softball and the force of a drummer. Maybe knew she had excellent upper body strength.
Rada jerked back with a
squawk of displeasure, all that hair flying around her face.
“Butter your own bread. Find your own man to boss around and be helpless for. This one is taken,” Maybe said.
Everyone had gone totally silent.
“I was just saying hello. I’ve known him a lot longer than you have,” Rada countered.
Maybe pointed to herself. “See this face? It says, don’t care. Like I said, he’s not in the Rada-bread-buttering or keeping-company business. Not anymore.”
Rada sat back, blinking with surprise. Evie smiled at Maybe before she shrugged and returned to her conversation with Vic.
“You heard her,” Irena told Rada. Then she switched to quiet Russian but given Rada’s expression, it was one of those tough love type speeches. Which, who knew, perhaps that was exactly what Rada had needed. Irena gave great pep talks.
“Are we okay?” Alexsei asked her. “I’m sorry she was so rude.”
“Yes. You let her know she was out of line. Thank you. As for her? I said what I needed to say and now I feel a lot better. I wish I’d buttered the bread first though.”
Alexsei laughed, hugging her to him, one armed. “That’s my zajka.”
* * *
RADA CALLED HER NAME. Maybe, who’d been halfway between her yard and the Orlovs’ back door, stopped, waiting for her to catch up.
“I wanted to talk to you about earlier,” Rada said.
“Yeah? What about it?” Maybe tucked her hands into her pockets and hunched into her coat a little to protect against the cold January night. She’d been next door since before noon and it was nearly eleven at night. She was tired, cold, tipsy and out of patience.
“I’m not trying to break you and Alexsei up. But you can’t get yourself worked into bread throwing every time we’re at the same event. I’m not going to pretend I don’t know him just because you can’t deal with the fact that he loved me once,” Rada said.
“I can totally deal with the fact that he loved you once. Of course he did. He wouldn’t have asked you to marry him if he hadn’t. That’s not the issue and you know it. I don’t like games, so let me be clear. You’re trying to get between me and him, me and the Orlovs, and that’s not going to happen. They’re good to me and I like being part of the family.”
“You’re the one trying that! Over there like you own the place.”
“Rada,” Maybe started with a deep, calming breath, because she knew what it felt like to be afraid of losing people. “I know you love the Orlovs. How could you not? They’re all wonderful. I know you grew up practically living here. They’re important to you. I’m not interested in making anyone choose between us. I’m not after who you are in this family. Like at all. But I’m not having any of this bullshit where you try to wall me out and make me feel unwelcome, or like I don’t belong.” She’d worked for that and wasn’t letting go of the ground she’d won.
Rada studied her carefully. “You really don’t care that he and I used to be together?”
“Aside from at times wondering what the hell you two had in common, no, I really don’t. I don’t think about it at all really. Unless we’re together somewhere and you start some shit.”
“I loved him too. A long time ago. I don’t want him back. But I still care about him. Enough that I want him to be happy. Enough that if you can stop being such a bitch, we can probably give each other enough space to coexist.”
“So you’re just annoying in general? Is that it?” Maybe asked her. “Like you see every situation as an opportunity to be as snotty as possible instead of just being chill and not terrible?”
Rada’s smile was not necessarily willing, but it was genuine. “You’re a total bitch. But that’s cool because I am too. I can admire that in you. Don’t hurt him. He’s nice.”
“I won’t. Not on purpose anyway.” Maybe paused a moment. “Oh. And just so we’re clear. Butter your own fucking bread in the future or I’ll throw a knife the next time.”
* * *
ALEXSEI CAME AROUND the corner to find Rada and Maybe standing in the middle of the yard, laughing together.
He hustled over, making sure to stop any potential for bloodshed in its tracks.
“Hi there, Maybe. What can I help you with?” he said before he nodded at Rada.
“You sound like a butler,” Rada told him. “We don’t need help. We’re fine. See you around, bitch.” Rada flipped Maybe off.
“Not if I see you first so I can pretend I’m not home and not answer my door.” Maybe flipped her off in return.
But they both laughed as they went about their separate business.
“Everything all right?” he asked carefully.
“Yes. I think it is. Boundaries are set. Expectations outlined. I threatened to stab her if she pissed me off again. It’s all good.”
He just stared, following her to her house.
CHAPTER TWENTY
MAYBE GOT OUT OF her car and started at the sight of her father on their doorstep. She’d left Whiskey Sharp with the beginning of a cold or something and the last thing she wanted was to have a scene with her father.
“Rachel’s not home,” she called out from a few feet away. Maybe hated that she feared him enough to stay out of his reach. Especially when most of the damage he’d caused was with his words.
Still, she had no plan to be alone with him in her house.
His expression was one of disdain. “I know. I’d like to talk to you.”
Red flags waved all around. He’d come there knowing Rachel was away? It could have been because he wanted a truce. But given the way he currently looked down his nose at her and the tone he’d already taken, she suspected it was more that he wanted to be an asshole and didn’t want an audience for it.
“Okay. Go on.” Maybe pulled her gloves from her backpack and put them on.
He sighed, impatience dripping from the sound. “I don’t want to have this discussion with you out here in your yard. This is private.”
She found her words, keeping herself rooted to the spot. She didn’t want him in her house. “No, I don’t think so. I think you can speak to me right now and keep it private just fine as long as you aren’t yelling.”
“Are you saying I’m not welcome in your home?” he asked, his voice gone low and sharp. “Your sister told me something similar recently. I’m guessing you’re where she got that.”
Rachel had told him to stay away from the house? Right then she loved her sister even more.
“I’m saying we can have this talk right here and right now. It’s a nice afternoon to be outside. I’ve got my gloves on now so I’m plenty warm. Now, what is it you wanted to say?”
“Why are you such a spiteful, ungrateful brat? You can’t simply invite me in like a human being with some manners. No, you want to have a talk out here so everyone can see. Because you want attention.”
“My offer to discuss something with you is quickly expiring.” This was her house. Her yard. Her life and he was not going to keep stomping in, messing her up and storming off.
She built herself after he’d tossed her away and it was long past time to start heating up the boiling oil she might need to pour on any invaders.
He curled his lip at her a moment. “Fine. You’re incompetent and utterly incapable of being your sister’s guardian. We plan to present Rachel with the evidence of this and if she won’t listen to reason, we’ll have to use all the means at our disposal.”
“Which means what exactly? I’m not her guardian. She doesn’t have one. She doesn’t need one either. She’s an adult. So why don’t you tell me what you’re really after?”
“No low-class loser is going to steal Rachel’s future because she’s got nothing for herself.”
She flinched as if she’d been slapped. His words doing more harm, hurting more than a fist could.
“I’m the low-
class loser in this little story I take it? And evidence of what exactly?”
She knew there was no evidence of any wrongdoing on her part because she’d never done anything wrong. Maybe was confident of that. Whatever her parents thought evidence was, it wasn’t anything that showed she’d harmed her sister in any way.
“She has something. A real talent for her work. You can’t rob it from her. She was born to work at the FBI.”
“Do you even listen to her? Ever?” Maybe asked, exasperated. “She doesn’t want to work at the FBI. And if she ever wants to, you only do more harm than good to constantly be on her about it.”
“It’s not up to you. You’re not smart enough to make these decisions for her. She needs to forget about what that monster did to her and move on. You only encourage her to wallow in it. Once she lets go of all that, she can get back on track.”
Maybe just stared at him for long moments, her insides gone cold.
“We’re done here,” she told him at last.
“You can’t just push us out of her life. We’re her parents.” He came down a step, and then another. Maybe stayed where she was, though she couldn’t deny knowing at least three ways to run if he got violent.
But that fear didn’t stop the words “Yeah, you’re mine too, in case that escaped your memory. No one is trying to push you out but you. This stuff you’re doing, it only estranges her from you. Can’t you see that? I know you love her, so let her do what she needs to do. Be proud of the choices she’s making now. Just as proud as the choices she made before.”
“I don’t need any parenting advice from you. If I need to buy drugs or know how to give a blow job, I’ll let you know.”
He stormed past her as hot tears of shame washed over her face.
Once inside, she locked up and, still shaking, headed to her room to lie in her bed with the covers over her head for a while.
* * *
ALEXSEI BARELY HELD back a growl of annoyance when he looked up to catch sight of Rada coming into Whiskey Sharp.
Maybe had gone home early. She hadn’t been feeling well. So at least she’d miss this visit. Though he’d have to tell her anyway or she’d hear it secondhand.