Call Girl

by Pavan Kaur

  Cupping my face, she looks at me and all I see is sadness and worry in her eyes. “She’ll beat this—she’s a fighter,” she says, wiping the tears from my face.

  I’ve never cried in front of my mom. I’ve always had this wall up to hide my feelings from her. It hurt when Edward left us, and what Angie did almost brought me to my knees, but I never cried for them, and my mom knows it. So, seeing me like this is a testament to how I feel for Lexi.

  “You love her more than anything in the world, don’t you?”

  “Ethan, the riskiest thing you will do in your lifetime is let yourself fall in love,” I say to my mom, and she looks at me in shock. I’m not sure if it’s because I remembered what she said, or that I’ve taken that risk with Lexi.

  “That's why she’ll beat this,” she says, moving out the way so Jackie can hug me.

  “I’ll talk to your mom and Tanya, and let them in on what's actually going on between you, Lexi, and me. At least how it started, anyway. The girls will be here soon,” Jackie whispers in my ear, and I give her a nod. “My girl is a fighter.”

  Turning back around as I hear the doors open, I look into the room. “I need two bags of O-neg! She’s still losing blood,” I hear someone shout. Before I can get close enough to see what’s going on, the doors close again.

  As a nurse runs past me, I grab her arm, preventing her from running back in. “Can you tell me anything?” I just need to know if she’s going to be okay.

  “Sir, I can’t. I’m sorry.” Pulling her arm out of my grip, she disappears through the door.

  “Ethan, come sit down,” I hear my mom say from behind me.

  “I’m fine where I am,” I tell her without taking my eyes away from the doors.

  “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” I feel Travis’s hand on my back. “If Lexi sees you looking like this, she’s not going to be happy,” he says, stopping in front of me.

  I look at him and think ‘how stupid can one person be? How totally self-absorbed?’ I stopped talking to my best friend because he was making my sister happy, because I was annoyed with him for crossing the line of friendship. Life is too fucking short to hold things against people, especially the ones you love.

  “I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you,” I tell him. I need to put that behind me and start enjoying life. That's exactly what I plan on doing, just as soon as I get Lexi home.

  “If you didn’t get pissed at me, then I would’ve worried more.” He smiles at me. “Now let's get you cleaned up.” Taking the bag from his hands, I look at the doors, hoping someone will come out. “We’re all here. Someone will get you if there’s an update.” Travis pushes me toward the restroom. “So, Jackie just told us about Lexi’s real job. Four million dollars for a date? I hope you took her somewhere nice.” He’s trying to lighten the mood, and I love him for it.

  “If she had taken the money, it would have been worth every damn dollar.” Stopping by the door, I turn back and look at Travis. “Will you stay by the door and wait for a doctor to come out?” I ask him. He doesn’t hesitate to reassure me.

  Walking into the restroom, I start scrubbing my hands. I need to get Lexi's blood off me. The feeling of it is just a reminder of how close I am to losing her. Looking up in the mirror, I don’t even recognize the man staring back me. My eyes are wild with panic, yet look so lost. Who is this man? This isn’t who I am. I feel as lifeless as her body looked lying on that dirty warehouse floor.

  After cleaning up and changing clothes, I walk back over to the door and see the detective talking to Tanya. They’re standing next to Travis, who looks over at me and shakes his head letting me know no one has come out.

  “The police want your clothes,” Travis says as he comes to stand by me. Handing over the bag, he relays what he’s told the detective. “I told him about the needle in her arm and the phone call between Sam and you. They don’t need to talk to you, for now.” I turn to face him. “He got Tanya when she was on her way to work, tied her up, but never touched her after that. He wanted Lexi. Tanya said the only thing he kept saying was that Lexi was going to die today.” Putting my hands in my pockets, I bite down on my bottom lip to stop me from doing or saying anything else. I can’t think about it. I can’t let him win. I have to believe Lexi will pull through and will be fine. “Come and sit down.”

  Walking over, I see Dan and Jon holding hands. Dan sees me and starts walking in my direction.

  “I’m sorry. Sorry that I didn’t fulfill my promise to keep her safe. I'll have to live with that for the rest of my life. Not only did I let you down, but I let her down.” I say as my eyes fill with tears. I try to blink them away, but one escapes and falls down my cheek.

  "You think I've come to you to start a fight? There was only one reason Lexi wanted to run. She knew this day would happen if she stayed, but she stayed anyway because she loves you and would have done anything to keep you safe. Hell, to keep any one of us safe. She would have done anything, even if it meant dying. So, no, Ethan, I’m not here to fight with you because I know she would have done it either way. I’m standing here, in front of the man who loves my sister. So much so, that no matter what I say, he'll still hold onto the guilt of her getting hurt. Guilt that he wasn't meant to take as his own. I’m standing in front of you to let you know we don’t blame you, and you shouldn’t blame yourself.” Dan pulls me in for a hug. “My sister is stronger than we give her credit for. Not only will she fight, she will win.”

  Pulling away from me, he walks back over to Jon. I sit on the chair closest to the door, trying not to blink for fear I'll miss someone coming out to tell us something. I know it hasn't been an hour yet, but God it feels like weeks. Why won’t someone come out and tell me what the hell is happening? I just need someone to tell me something—anything.

  Lexi

  “Hello?” I look around the room but don't see anyone. “Is anyone there?” I ask, walking further into the room. I stop as I look at my body lying on the ground. Turning around, I see Sam looking at me with a grin on his face.

  “You know, Teresa, I always knew I would find you. I spent a lot of time planning what I would do when I did.” Sam lights a cigarette, walks over, and kneels next to me. “This is for leaving me when you know that you are my wife. You don’t get to leave me.” Sam lifts my shirt up and taps the cigarette so that the ashes drop onto my wound, and I scream out in pain.

  “I…you never…loved me,” I watch myself tell him. I walk closer to my body in the corner and see I must be losing the fight because my blood covers the ground around me.

  “That’s where you’re wrong. I love you so much that I don’t want anyone else to touch you. You are my wife, and I knew you would never come back to me, so I’m making sure that no one else can have you.” His finger moves around my wound, and all I can do is watch my body trembling on the floor.

  “Sam, if you want to kill me, just kill me,” I tell him.

  “I want to watch you die slowly. It’s much more fun for me that way.” I watch him walking back to his chair.

  Hearing a noise from behind me, I walk out of the room, “Hello? Who’s there?” I look around then behind me, but the room is gone. I’m in my childhood home.

  “Hey, princess.” I turn around to see my father standing there. Running over to him, I jump into his arms and hug him for all I'm worth.

  “Am I dead?” I ask him.

  “No. Well, not yet. It'll all depend on how much you want to fight to live.” He cups my face between his large, gentle hands and looks at me with such love on his face. “You look just like your mother... So beautiful.” Taking my hand, he leads me to the garden, and we sit on the bench swing. “So, Princess, do you want to live or die?”

  I turn to face my father. “Wouldn’t it be easier to die? I mean, Sam wouldn’t hurt anyone else that I love, and they could all live a life without worrying about him.”

  “But is that what you want? Do you think everyone will be happier without you around? Bef
ore you answer, let me show you something.” Taking my hand, we walk back in through the front door, but we aren’t at home anymore. Looking around, I see we are standing in the hospital waiting room.

  “Ethan,” I run over to him.

  “You think this man can live without you? Look at him,” my father says from behind me.

  And I do. I look at Ethan, but it isn’t him. I've never seen him look so lost. If something happened to me, could he come back from it? Looking over at Dan, I see him and Jon sitting together.

  “Dan?” I go to touch him, but stop, remembering I’m not actually here.

  “You are your brother's world. It'll kill him knowing you aren’t here for him.”

  I feel a shock slamming into my body. “Dad, what’s happening?” I'm afraid as I feel the shock again. “Dad? Help me, please!” I shout as I fall to the floor as the pain hits me again.

  At a touch on my shoulder, I look up and see a different room. Slowly standing up, I see the doctors and nurses looking at the lifeless body on the table. It’s my lifeless body they are furiously working to save. The shock hits me again, and the pain is almost more than I can take.

  “Princess, the choice is yours. Do you want to live or die?” I look at him again. “I've never left you, and I'm not going to start now. I am always with you. When you begin to doubt it, remember this feeling and know that I’m here. But, for now, you have to make a choice.”

  I look at my father. I don’t want to leave him, but I don’t want to leave Ethan either. The shock hits me again, and I look at myself lying on the bed.

  Ethan

  Looking at my watch for the hundredth time, it seems as if the second hand is moving slower than it should. Three hours have passed, and not one doctor or nurse has come to tell me what's happening. All I want is for someone to tell me everything is okay, but I’m not getting anything. Then again, it might be best for them to not come if they can’t give me something definitive. I don’t want to lose my temper and start shouting at the medical staff. That's the last thing they need to hear.

  Rubbing my forehead, I look over at Tanya sleeping on the chairs. Travis stares at me with a look that tells me he doesn’t have the words to comfort me. Standing up, I walk back over to the door, hoping I'll see or hear something. All I hear are the mumblings of everyone else in the waiting room. Some of Jackie's girls came in when Lexi was admitted and haven’t left since they got here.

  Every time the doors open and close behind me, the smell of medicines and disinfectant assaults my senses.

  The door flies open and a nurse hurries out. My eyes freeze on the floor, covered in blood-soaked bandages. As the nurse opens the doors to rush back into the room, I get a quick glance at Lexi lying on the table. As I take a step closer, hoping to hear something, the door suddenly swings shut.

  Damn it! I stare at the doors again, waiting for something—anything. All I can do is wait. Turning around, I see my mom looking over at me. Even though I’m standing this far from her, her eyes tell me everything is going to be okay.

  “Lexi Jackson?” I turn around at the sound of her name to see the same doctor that met us at the ambulance.

  “Yes?” I look over at Dan as he comes over stand to with me.

  “She’s still unconscious, but she’s stable. All we can do now is wait for her to wake up. She lost a lot of blood, which prevented us from being able to completely fix the damage during surgery. Once she’s awake, and her body has had a little time to recover from the initial trauma, we’ll go back in.” The doctor stops and looks at Dan and me. “Is Lexi married?”

  “I’m her boyfriend,” I tell her, and the look on her face is enough to crush me. What has happened to Lexi that has the doctor so concerned?

  “The stab wound…” she stops for a moment. “The stab wound cut into one of her ovaries and fallopian tubes. This has significantly decreased the chances of her conceiving naturally. She might not be able to get pregnant.” She watches me as I stare at her, letting the words sink in.

  Okay, so we might not be able to have children. I can live with that as long as Lexi is alive and well. “There’s only one thing I’m concerned with right now. Is she going to survive this?”

  “The next twenty-four-hours are critical and depend entirely on her. If there are no further complications, then she will probably need to stay in the hospital for a week or two before she can go home. She’ll be on bed rest for a short while once she goes home, but should be fine from there,” the doctor tells me.

  “Can I see her?”

  “The nurses are moving her to a private room. They'll call you when she’s settled.” The doctor gives us a nod and walks back into the room.

  Sitting in the closest chair I can find, I don’t know whether to be relieved or still be worried. I have to believe Lexi will beat this. She came through the hardest part, now she just has to wake up to get to the finish line.

  “Ethan,” Dan says, sitting in the chair next to me. “I’m not sure what your plans for children are, but Lexi has always wanted a family. She knew she couldn’t even dream about it until Sam was no longer in the picture, but after she knew she was safe, she definitely wanted children. This is going to be a devastating blow, but—”

  “Dan, I’m not leaving her. All the doctor said was that it could be more difficult for her, not that it would be impossible. When that time comes, we'll think of something, But, until the day I die, I’m not leaving her,” I say. I walk away from him before I say something we’ll both regret.

  I know Dan is coming from a good place, but does he really think I would leave if Lexi couldn’t have children? I'll always love her, with or without children.

  “Ethan, you don’t have to be—”

  “I know, Mom. Before you say anything else, I know. I just need everyone to realize that I don’t care about anything else right now. All I want to do is see her, to hold her, to…” Sitting in the chair, I put my head into my hands and let the tears fall down my face. “I want to tell her that I love her,” I say through sobs.

  Mom puts her hand on my head and pulls me closer to her. “I know. I promise this pain you’re feeling will all be over the second she wakes up.” Kneeling in front of me, she puts her hand on my cheek and just looks at me for a moment. “And when she does wake up, you never forget to tell her every day how much you love her,” she says.

  I take her hand from my cheek and hold it in mine, then lean forward to give my mom a kiss on the cheek. My phone rings in my pocket, so I take it out and cancel the call without even looking to see who it was.

  “Give me your phone,” Travis says, putting his hand out as it rings again. “Hand it over.” I place my phone in his hand and watch as he walks away from us.

  “I guess you're now on leave from work,” my mom tells me as she stands up. I look over at Travis talking on my phone. “Now that you’ve finally forgiven him, he’s not going to fuck it up,” she adds with a little laugh. I know he won’t mess anything up and I’m glad he took over, because my mind isn’t in the right place to focus on work.

  ***

  “Lexi Jackson’s family?” a woman calls out, and I trip over my feet trying to get to the nurse. She points at Dan and then at me. “Brother?”

  “That’s me,” Dan tells her.

  “At the moment, we can only allow the immediate family,” she apologizes. I look at the nurse, dumbfounded. Does she really think she's going to stop me from seeing her? “Don’t be alarmed with all the wires and the beeping of the monitors. They’re there so we can keep an eye on her.” She looks at Dan the entire time she's talking.

  “This is her boyfriend. Can’t he come in?” Dan asks her.

  “I’m sorry, but no. Not until she wakes up.” The nurse looks over at me, then back at Dan.

  Dan looks at her, then over at Jon, then back at the nurse. “Only one person can be with her until she wakes up?” he asks.

  “Yes, I’m sorry,” she replies. She doesn’t look sorry.


  “Well, I am her support person, and I’m saying he will be staying with her tonight.” I look at Dan pointing at me. There is no way I’ll ever be able to thank him enough for this. “I'll be back to see her in the morning,” he tells the nurse.

  “Thank you,” I tell him. There was no way I could have gone any longer without seeing her. Putting me first is the kindest thing anyone other than Lexi or my family has ever done for me.

  “If you would like to follow me.”

  I look back at the nurse walking away from us. I have to jog to catch up to her since she’s already half-way down the hall. Stopping in front of Lexi's room, I look in the doorway. For the first time in my life, I have no words. She’s so pale, and wires are coming out from everywhere.

  “Please don’t touch the wires. Keep talking to her even if she doesn’t respond. She can hear you. Sir, are you listening?” she asks.

  “Yes, don’t touch the wires, and talk to her,” I reply without taking my eyes off Lexi. Walking into the room, I stop by the bed. “Can I touch her?”

  “Of course,” the nurse tells me while she looks at the monitors and fiddles with the tubes and lines.

  Placing my hand on Lexi’s, I lean in closer. “Hello, beautiful,” I say, placing a feather light kiss on her lips. “How about you wake up now? We’ve been waiting to see those beautiful eyes.” Breathing in her scent, I pause at her neck and allow my lips to linger just another second. I pull the chair closer to the bed and sit there holding her hand. “Everyone’s here. Dan, Jon, Tanya, Mom, Jackie, and some of the girls from your work. Oh, and you’ll be happy to know that Travis and I are talking again.” The doctor walks in looking at the monitor, writing something down. “How long until she wakes up?”