Bryony wasn’t sure if he was teasing her or telling her the truth. His expression gave nothing away and, while his endearment had been delivered casually, it had been exactly that—casual. It didn’t necessarily mean a thing. She wanted to convince herself he had loved her for all those years but it seemed too far-fetched to have any basis in reality, especially given the way he’d gone about demanding reparation for her family’s part in his past.
She lowered her eyes and, with a barely audible sigh, leant her head against his sweat-slicked chest, her ear pressed to the deep thud of his heart. She closed her eyes as one of his hands began to stroke through the silky strands of her hair, wishing with all of her heart that she could stay like that for ever.
CHAPTER NINE
BRYONY opened her eyes some time later to find Kane’s dark gaze trained on her, his arms still around her, his long legs entwined with hers.
She moistened her dry mouth as he moved against her intimately, the hot surge of his flesh against hers sparking a slow steady burn deep inside her.
She sighed as his hand slid up from her waist to shape her breast. His hand stilled its movements, his palm warm as it rested against her soft flesh.
Her thoughts went haywire as he bent his head, his tongue gently laving the tightness of her nipple. She buried her fingers in his dark hair and became lost in the glory of being in his arms, telling herself she would think about the future some other time, for now this was where she wanted to be. Maybe he didn’t love her but he certainly desired her, and as long as he continued to do so, surely she had a chance to show him how much her feelings had changed?
She sighed again as he took her mouth beneath his, her slim arms coming around him, holding him to her, the soft tremble of her body against his propelling him to claim her without restraint, his harsh groan as he did so igniting her passion to new heights.
She felt herself being caught up in the rhythm of his deep stroking thrusts until her body sang with delight as every nerve stretched and tightened in search of release.
When he lifted her hips to intensify the contact of his hard body with her softness she tipped over the edge of reason into the free fall of heart-stopping ecstasy, the tremors of her body sending him on his own pathway to paradise. She felt him empty himself, the deep shudders of his large body reverberating along her much smaller one. Such physical closeness was mind-blowing to her. It seemed almost sacred and she wanted to hold the moment to store it away for private reflection.
Kane eased himself away from her and lay with his hand across his eyes, his chest moving up and down as his breathing gradually returned to normal.
Bryony lay in an agony of indecision. Should she tell him of how her feelings had changed or should she pretend things were as they had been before?
She took an unsteady breath and wished she had the courage to nestle up against him for reassurance. Apart from his obvious physical reaction, he seemed so unaffected by what had passed between them while her flesh was still tingling from his touch even as her heart was bursting with emotion.
In an effort to appear as unmoved as he, she eased herself off the bed and reached for a bathrobe with forced casualness, tying the knot at her waist as she turned back to face him.
‘I’m going to have a shower,’ she announced, releasing the curtain of her hair from the back of the bathrobe.
‘Want some company?’ His eyes flared with kindling desire.
‘I think I’ll be much quicker on my own,’ she answered somewhat primly.
His deep chuckling laugh sent a riot of sensations through her tingling flesh. ‘Have your shower, Bryony. I won’t disturb you any more tonight.’
She moved towards the bathroom, not sure she wanted him to see just how deeply disturbed she was by his presence. Her body ached tenderly where he had been, her inner muscles protesting with each step she took.
‘Bryony.’
His voice stalled her progression and she turned to look back at him propped up amongst the bank of pillows, his hands behind his head in a self-possessed manner, the thin sheet barely covering his arrant maleness.
‘Yes?’ Was that her voice, that tiny breathless whisper?
He looked at her thoughtfully without speaking.
Bryony felt her skin rise in goose-pimples at the undisguised heat in his gaze, as if he could see through the towelling fabric of the robe she was wearing. She unconsciously tightened the tie at her waist as his gaze ran over her, lingering on her mouth before returning to her face.
‘It was always going to happen, you know.’
She looked at him uncertainly. ‘What was?’
‘You and me,’ he said. ‘It was only a matter of time.’
She turned back to the bathroom, unwilling to let him see the raw emotion she was feeling. Would she ever be able to look into those dark eyes without restraint? Would she have to disguise her love for him for years to come, never once revealing how deeply moved she was by his passion? How was she to negotiate such a future?
She turned on the shower and stepped under the spray, the fine hot needles stinging her flesh where a few minutes ago his mouth and hands had lingered. She sucked in a ragged breath as the water ran between her thighs, reminding her anew of his possession and the unerring gentleness of how he’d introduced her to his length. How had she thought him a barbarian for all those years? His touch had been almost reverent as he’d led her to paradise, his patience with her inexperience moving her to tears.
She closed her eyes and tried to envisage a future where they could both have what they wanted but it seemed impossible. Kane had wanted revenge and had sought it ruthlessly, taking everything away from her parents, including her. For her to love him so unreservedly seemed to be somewhat traitorous to Austin’s memory and tantamount to treason where her father and mother were concerned. How could she have it both ways? Wouldn’t she always have to choose between them and her own happiness?
When she came back to the bedroom Kane appeared to be sleeping, his long body taking up more than his fair share of the bed. Bryony hesitated beside the bed, wondering if he would notice if she slipped off to the spare room.
‘Don’t even think about it,’ he rumbled without even opening his eyes, his hand holding open the sheets for her.
With just the slightest hesitation she eased herself in beside his warm frame, her breath tightening as his arms came around her to draw her into the hard wall of his chest, his long legs entwining with hers.
‘Comfy?’ His breath tickled the back of her neck as he spoke.
Bryony suppressed a shiver as his palm came to rest on her belly, his fingers splayed possessively against her quivering flesh.
She lay stiffly, not willing to move in case she betrayed her growing need of him. The masculine hair on his chest tickled her, his stirring erection tormented her and his warm breath on her shoulder tantalized her until she could barely think.
‘Relax.’ His tone held a trace of amusement as he tucked her closer against him. ‘You’re as stiff as a board.’
Her eyes widened as his hard male presence slipped between her legs, the heat and length of him almost burning her soft skin where it pressed so insistently.
‘I could say the very same about you,’ she gasped as his fingers moved a fraction lower.
She felt his rumble of laughter all along the sensitive skin of her back where it was pressed up against him.
‘Go to sleep, agape mou.’ His lips kissed the smooth skin of her shoulder. ‘I think you’ve had quite enough of me for one night.’
She closed her eyes and tried to make her muscles relax but it became increasingly impossible to ignore him. Her body began to pulse with need, her legs trembling where he lay between them, his hardness against her softness reminding her of all of the essential differences between them.
She listened as his breathing evened out, holding her own breath in case she alerted him to her unease, unwilling to reveal how much he unsettled her.
Just when she thought she could stand it no more she felt him move behind her, his hands coming to her shoulders, turning her over so she was lying half beneath him, his chest pressing against her tight breasts where they lay aching for his touch beneath the simple cotton of her nightgown.
The moonlight coming in from the windows cast his features in silver, the white line of his scar clearly visible as he looked down at her with eyes smouldering with desire.
‘Is this what you’re after?’ he asked, slipping into her warmth as her legs made room for him between them, her nightgown bunched up around her waist in wanton abandon.
Her choked ‘yes’ was swallowed by the descent of his mouth and her arms came around his neck to hold him to her as his body delved into hers for the release they both craved. She felt herself climbing towards it, the delicious sensations coursing through her, rising to a crescendo inside her head until she was uncertain where her body ended and his began.
The tumultuous release was a revelation to her; she had never imagined her body to be capable of such intense feelings as she soared to the heights of ecstasy.
His pinnacle of pleasure echoed through her tender flesh, the heat and strength of him as he burst forth demonstrating how tenuous his control had been. It secretly delighted her that she could bring him to such a point. It showed him at his most vulnerable, lost to the sensation of intimate flesh on intimate flesh and skin on skin in the mind-blowing exchange of pleasure.
She nestled against him, her cheek pressed against the wall of his chest where his heart thudded, his arms loose around her but no less possessive.
She felt safe in a way she had never felt before.
She closed her eyes and breathed in the warm scent of his skin, her hands around him, holding him to her, her lips silently mouthing the words she didn’t quite have the courage to say out loud: I love you.
Kane stared at the moonlight dancing on the ceiling above him, the soft weight of Bryony in his arms a burden he had waited years to bear. His body still throbbed with the echo of pleasure, his heart tightening at the realisation of his need for her to fill his life in every way imaginable.
For years he had scoffed at the notion of love, fighting against being ensnared by such a confining emotion which could only leave him as vulnerable as his mother had been. He’d had affairs that had touched his body but not his heart and he had turned away from them with few regrets.
He glanced down at the sleeping woman in his arms, her soft mouth pressed against his chest, her slight body warm from the intimate embrace of his.
He slid his hand down the smooth silk of her arm, his mouth softening as he recalled the way she had responded to him. He hadn’t been expecting innocence but it had delighted him all the same, making him feel as if she had been waiting for him all those years.
He felt her shift against him, her arms tightening around his waist, the soft murmur of something unintelligible leaving the soft shield of her lips as she burrowed even closer.
His hand went to the gloss of her hair, his fingers threading through the silky strands as if willing them to bind her to him.
He heard her sigh as she snuggled against him, her guard well and truly down now she was asleep.
He lowered his chin to the top of her head, closing his eyes as he breathed in the flowery scent of her hair, the fragrance of her skin, the touch of her hands where they lay against him like a soothing balm on the rough edges of his tortured soul…
CHAPTER TEN
BRYONY woke to the sound of the surf pounding the shore, a stiff breeze stirring the waves, the white caps of foam galloping across the surface of the bay like a thousand horses.
She turned from the window as the bedroom door opened, unconsciously clutching the edges of a bathrobe around her naked body as Kane’s dark eyes met hers.
‘How did you sleep?’ he asked.
Bryony found it hard to hold his gaze as a vision of their passion-driven bodies flitted unbidden into her mind. In the cold hard light of morning her actions of the night before seemed totally out of character and inconsistent with her earlier determination to keep well away from him, marriage or no marriage.
It appalled her that she had fallen into his arms so unguardedly, practically confessing her love for him while he was no doubt congratulating himself on finally achieving his despicable ends.
How he must be gloating with victory! He had taken everything off her father and to add to his considerable haul she had unthinkingly given him that which she had offered no other man.
She could see the light of triumph in his eyes as they ran over her possessively and she inwardly seethed.
Shame sharpened her tongue and injured pride brought daggers to her eyes as she faced him.
‘It was wrong of you to take advantage of me last night. You know very well I wasn’t ready to make that sort of commitment. It was nothing less than barbarous of you.’
His expression instantly tightened, his eyes darkening as they narrowed slightly.
‘I only took what was on offer, agape mou,’ he drawled. ‘And, as for not being ready—’ his lazy gaze dipped to her pelvis and back ‘—you were so very wet and—’
‘No!’ Bryony clamped her hands over her ears so she didn’t have to hear her shame spoken out loud. ‘That’s not true! I didn’t want you. I don’t want you. I hate you.’
Kane held her defiant glare. ‘We are married, Bryony, and now we are lovers. There’s no going back.’
‘Find yourself another sexual plaything,’ she tossed at him heatedly. ‘Have all the affairs you like. See if I care.’
‘You know you are far more like your mother than you realize,’ he said after a telling little pause.
Something in his tone unnerved her, making her autocratic demeanour slip a fraction. ‘W-why do you say that?’
‘Your mother has consistently turned a blind eye to your father’s affairs for years.’
Bryony’s mouth fell open and it was a full thirty seconds before she could locate her voice. ‘My father’s…affairs?’
He gave her a scathing look. ‘You surely don’t expect me to believe you didn’t know?’
She gave a convulsive swallow. ‘I…I had no idea…’
‘Oh, come on now, Bryony.’ His tone was now impatient. ‘Isn’t this taking family loyalty a little too far?’
‘I know my father isn’t perfect…’
‘He’s far from perfect, in fact, I’d call him more of a pervert.’
She reared back as if he’d struck her. ‘You can’t possibly mean that.’
‘You should know me well enough by now to know I mean what I say. Anyway, why are you so keen to defend him?’
‘He’s my father…’
‘So, no matter what evidence there is, you will continue to take his side, even though your gut feeling tells you differently?’
‘You know nothing of my feelings.’
‘I know you love your mother and at least we have that in common,’ he said. ‘I loved my own, even though I thought she was a fool to put up with what she did.’
‘My mother loves my father…’ she stated for the sake of something to say, even though to this day she had never really understood her mother’s continued devotion to a man who treated her so appallingly most of the time.
He gave her a long assessing look. ‘Your mother hasn’t been the only woman to love your father.’
Something in the intensity of his gaze held her transfixed. She felt as if she was on the cusp of something life-changing…as if he were about to dislodge every stable rampart she’d carefully constructed around her life to keep it as secure as possible under the constantly shifting circumstances.
‘His…affairs do you mean?’ she ventured.
‘One in particular springs to mind.’
‘Which one?’
He held her gaze for an interminable pause. ‘The one he had with my mother.’
The words fell into the room like the boom of a firecracker explodi
ng. Bryony felt herself clutching at the chest of drawers behind her to anchor herself against the shock of his revelation, her thoughts flying around her head, trying to find a foothold to steady herself against the gut-wrenching realisation that what he had just revealed was in all probability true.
But Kane’s mother?
‘Your…your mother?’ she gasped. ‘My father had an affair with your mother?’
The look he gave her was filled with hatred but somehow she knew it wasn’t directed at her. ‘Your father wanted value for his money and he made damn sure he got it.’
She swallowed the lump of bile in her throat. ‘What do you mean?’
His eyes were like burning coals as they held hers. ‘Why do you think he offered to pay for me to go to the same private school as your brother?’
Bryony felt as if the floor had moved beneath her so great was her shock. She opened and closed her mouth but no sound came out of her strangled throat.
‘He struck up a deal with my mother,’ Kane continued grimly. ‘He offered to foot my educational bills in return for her sexual favours. My mother agreed to it because she loved me and wanted me to have what she couldn’t give me, having been rejected by her family for having a child out of wedlock. She also agreed to it because she believed Owen genuinely loved her. That, of course, was her biggest mistake.’
‘How…how long did…they…?’ she could barely get the words out, so great was her distress.
‘Their affair went on for years. I knew nothing of it until the day you saw me waiting outside your father’s study. I decided to find out if the rumour I’d heard was true.’
She stared at him as awareness gradually dawned. ‘That’s why you wrecked the lawn and the roses, wasn’t it?’
‘I wanted to put that bloody tractor right through the house but you were inside and…’ He cleared his throat and continued, his tone harsher than ever. ‘Your father always prided himself on the immaculate condition of the garden and lawn. I guess it was the first thing I thought of in that initial moment of blind fury. I wanted to make that garden as dirty and chopped up as I felt inside for having received the financial benefits of my mother’s sacrifices to your father’s demands.’
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