by Brenda Ford
“Oh, Brad.” I imagine her whispering against me, wearing that beautiful swim suit of hers, as her hand replaces mine. “I want to hold you again. You felt so good last night when I held you.”
“Fucking hell,” I moan aloud as I picture her silky fingers on me. “Fuck, Tami.”
I stroke myself hard and fast, now feeling the sensation of her mouth as she takes me between her lips. She hasn’t had my cock in her mouth yet, but I know what those plump lips of hers look like and I can see her vividly, dragging that mouth up and down me, her tongue licking me everywhere. She feels fucking incredible. I just know that she will be phenomenal at everything when it comes to touching my body…
“Fuck me, Tami.” My emotion balls up in my throat. “Fuck me again.”
I flicker through a couple more pictures, loving her smile, her dresses, her body. The pressure builds up inside of myself as I really look at her. She’s honestly the most beautiful woman that I have ever seen. I noticed that right away, but I didn’t really see it. I didn’t notice how stunning she was deep down. I didn’t see beyond the outside of her. Now, knowing more of her, she’s utterly gorgeous. She’s everything I want and more.
“I want you,” I moan desperately as the pleasure builds and increases. “I want you forever.”
I explode like a freaking volcano, making a real mess of myself. The release is needed, it feels incredible picturing her with me, experiencing this with Tami once more… but as soon as the post orgasmic bliss begins to fade, the sadness comes back because she really isn’t here with me. She’s somewhere else, with other people, doing God knows what. Since she went to an engagement party she might be hung over, in bed, missing me too. Wanting me just as much as I want her. Wouldn’t that be something? If that’s the case, then me and her could really have something. We could end up together, in a real relationship, screw the complications.
“Just call her,” I moan to myself with irritation. “Why can’t you just call her?”
But I know I won’t. Even less so now. I can’t touch myself over her pictures then phone her. It doesn’t work like that. I won’t be able to hold it together. Maybe it would be better to causally try and see her on Monday, to try and gauge how she reacts to me before I do anything stupid.
Nelson will be disappointed in me, if I tell him. He will think so much more of me if I just be brave and call her. Since I’m something of an inspiration to him, I should do what he needs… but sadly, I’m too freaked out.
“Monday,” I tell myself decisively. “I will sort this out on Monday.”
Chapter 9 – Tami – Monday
“It will be fine,” I whisper to myself as I walk through the office doors. “It will. Everything will be fine.”
At least now I am back in the creative room, back working with Angelo, so I don’t have to worry about facing Brad so personally now. Yes, he didn’t make a big deal out of the kiss and we managed to make it work, but sex is something different. I don’t know if I would be able to find a way to overcome what really happened. I would just spend the whole damn day blushing and not being able to meet his eyes at all.
It was just a one night stand, I remind myself, just like I have spent all weekend doing. If it was more, I would know about it. He would have called me or something. If I just accept that, then I can cope and move on. Sure, it isn’t the ideal way to lose my virginity, I would much prefer it to have happened in a relationship where I would be much more comfortable now… but I don’t regret the experience. It was a great one, but there’s a reason that it didn’t answer any questions and that’s because it wasn’t meant to. It was just an experience.
Brad Smith is a bit of a player. He’s not a commitment guy and that’s okay. I don’t need to feel any type of way about it. I can just accept what happened and move on. It isn’t exactly the wisest idea to keep sleeping with my boss anyway. One time was bad enough but to keep on doing it… well, that would be dumb.
I hold my head up high and make my way into my usual office, my old home which will become my new home once more. Only I’m not going to be next to Angelo, working for him. I’ll be beside him.
“Hey, you!” Angelo cries out with a giant smile as soon as he sees me. “I have just been clearing your desk.”
“Ooh, my new desk.” I shiver with excitement. “I can’t wait to get started.”
“Me and you need to have a meeting today, to discuss your new accounts.”
I push all the drama behind me, a smile so bright on my face it’s like I have a coat hanger between my lips. Everything that happened last week was worth it to end up at the top. I can’t even think that I slept my way there because the promotion was discussed long before we ended up doing anything.
“That sounds great. I will just get myself settled, then you call me over whenever you’re ready.”
I’m so glad that Angelo is happy for me. He could be annoyed with his brother for taking away his assistant, but he’s being supportive and helping my career to grow. I will always be grateful to him. As I take my seat, I smile widely at him, letting him know silently just how happy I am.
The morning passes by in a haze. Once I have had my meeting with Angelo and I know what I need to do, I get started. I bury myself in the work and I feel myself thriving. This is the sort of job that I know will keep me happy forever. I can use my creativity well, my education ill come in handy, so will all the work experience that came before. Plus, no two days will be the same. I won’t get the chance to get bored.
It isn’t until lunch time that I start to notice something weird. A strange atmosphere in the building which seems to be centered around me. Because I haven’t had a moment to myself to even notice anything else, I haven’t spotted it until now, but I can definitely feel it surrounding me. It’s like all eyes are upon me, wanting something from me, expecting something and I don’t know what it is.
Is it because of the promotion? I can’t help but wonder. People might be annoyed that I’m so young and in a position of power already. But that sort of thing happens all the time. Talent does win out sometimes, and I’m not going to feel bad because I have been noticed for being good at my job. That isn’t right. I should be proud of myself. Perhaps this is what life is about. The higher you get, the less people like you.
Be strong, I remind myself. Keep your head up high. Keep doing what you’re doing.
The discomfort doesn’t go. It remains sitting firmly in the pit of my stomach, but I do what I can to ignore it. I head back to my desk with my lunch with me and I work while I eat. I’m not exactly in with the big circle of friends here anyway, so it isn’t going to change anything that much. I will be fine.
But then I see a couple of girls standing across the room from me, blatantly whispering and talking about me. Laughing too. I can’t help it, that becomes the last straw. The emotion really gets to me. Why am I being treated like this because of a job? Why are all the mean girls being worse than usual?
Tears prick in the back of my eyes and I already know that I don’t want to fall apart here, so I bolt up from my chair and I practically run to the toilets. At least in there I can lock myself away until I feel better. If everyone is bitching about me because I have been given a promotion, then I can’t let them break me. I can’t let them see me upset. I need to calm myself down at least until I can hold my head high again.
I slam the bathroom cubical door behind me and sit on the toilet seat as I grab myself some tissues. I just need to get rid of the tears as a start. Then I can get my head in the right place.
“…oh my God!” a squeaky annoying voice yells out as the bathroom door swings open. “Can you believe it?”
I suck in a breath as I hear Tawny. She’s the last person I want to see right now. She’s the cheer leader, gossipy type who I know doesn’t have a nice word to say about anyone. This isn’t good. If there is something going on surrounding me, then I’m sure she will fucking love to talk about it now.
“I know,” Beth drawls
back. “It’s always the quiet ones, isn’t it? If I thought anyone was going to sleep her way to the top it would be Hayey. That slut will do anything to get far in life.”
My blood runs ice cold, I don’t think I could breathe or move even if I wanted to. This conversation has horror struck inside of me. It’s too close for comfort for my liking. I remember hazily asking Brad if there was anyone still in the office and he didn’t know or care… this might be the consequence of that.
“But Tami, no way!” Tawny shrieks. “That boring bitch is too damn dull to be fucking Brad Smith. How the hell would she manage to seduce him? I thought that she was still a virgin to be honest. You can just tell by the way that she carries herself. But maybe she is a secret whore after all.”
“Well, it obviously got her what she wanted, didn’t it? She’s been promoted way above where she should be.”
The cackle with laughter as if this gossip is something to have fun with, like it isn’t my life. The tears that threatened to come earlier now spill down my face hard. I have been so stupid. I just about came to terms with the fact that I gave myself over to a man who only wanted me for one thing, but now to know that it’s become something hilarious for everyone to talk about and judge me over… I don’t know if that is something I will ever be able to recover from. I’m not one to be the center of attention ever.
I think about Chelsea and the drunken words she said to me at her engagement party. She was so proud of me for defying the odds and making something of a success of myself. She basically said that I’m the only one of our group who has made anything of myself. That’s because the job market is hard, and I might have to be back out there now. Facing the rejection and the pain. Trying to start over. And what will I say when they ask me why I’m not in my old job anymore? That I fucked my boss and made a mess of things?
“Since Brad is screwing around with the employees, you think he will fuck me?”
“You want to, Tawny? Of course he would. You’re actually sexy and beautiful. Why wouldn’t he?”
“Unless he just has terrible taste. I mean, how could you go from that basic bitch to the bomb?”
As Tawny and Beth slag me off some more, it feels like the walls are closing in on me. I can’t seem to get any air into my lungs no matter how hard I breathe now, and I really am trying to gasp air in. I have completely given up on trying to be quiet, I just need to stop feeling so dizzy.
I need to get out, I tell myself decisively. Out of the whole building. I can’t just sit here anymore.
It doesn’t even matter that I will have to pass the two biggest bitches in the office to get out of here. I just need to escape. Maybe it will even teach them a lesson to know that I overheard them and their bitchiness. It might make them keep their God damn mouths shut in future.
I shove the door open, barely able to see as I try to get to the door, but it instantly becomes clear that I have made a massive mistake. I definitely should have remained locked away in that damn cubicle until they left. Tawny bursts into an unapologetic laughter and Beth stands in the way of the door.
“Oh my God, she is here! She’s here. The slutty bitch is here,” Beth screams delightedly. “She was listening in to us the entire time. Isn’t that freaking hilarious. Now we can ask her all about it.”
“Please,” I whisper beg, probably pointlessly. “Please, just let me go.”
“Oh no, we want to know if Amy is telling the truth,” Tawny jumps in. “Did she really see you and Brad at it? Because her description was very freaking graphic. I have to say that I believe her.”
Amy. Oliver’s assistant. The other bitchy girl in this group. Of all the people who had to see me and Brad, why the hell did it have to be her? I don’t know if I can deny the truth. Not believably.
“Just let me go. Leave me alone. I want to leave. Please, this is crazy.”
“Oh, hell no.” Tawny stands in my way now too. “You are going to tell us the truth. You got a promotion and we all know why. It isn’t right. Why should some whore get promoted over other people?”
The tears are practically soaking my face. I’m a fucking mess. I don’t think I could get any more words out even if I wanted to. Not that I know what the hell I’m going to say anyway. I just need to shove them out of the way and get through this door. We aren’t in high school; I’m not going to be bullied by these bitches and that’s the end of it. I use all my might to break them apart and to get the hell out.
Chapter 10 – Brad – Monday
“What did you do?” Angelo declares while punching me in the arm, a little too hard to be jokey if I’m honest. “Mate, please tell me you haven’t completely fucked everything up already. I had such high hopes.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I glare and rub the bruise I know is forming. “I’m trying to work here.”
“Everyone is talking about you. You’re the subject of office gossip. You aren’t aware of that?”
“Oh, fucking office politics. Why the hell would I care about that? I’m sure this isn’t the first time around, is it? People should be working rather than bitching. Don’t they know there’s a lot to get done here?”
Angelo rolls his eyes at me. “You might care this time around because it affects Tami.”
My blood runs ice cold. Angelo is right, I do care. If it affects only me, then I’m not going to give a shit. I have thick skin and can withstand whatever. But I don’t know if Tami is the same. She’s sweet and really good. She’s different to me in that way, and I like it. I don’t want her to face anything challenging.
“What do you mean?” I snap angrily, shoving my laptop away. “What is everyone talking about?”
“A couple of people saw you kissing each other as they left work on Friday, and apparently it looked like it was leading somewhere. Everyone is speculating what’s going on. It’s a shit show out there.”
Fucking hell. This is a nightmare. I got caught up in the heat of the moment. On Friday night, I didn’t care if anyone saw us but now, I’m realizing the implications of that. I mean, people can speculate about me all they want. No one will be brave enough to say it to my face, but Tami… well, it’s a different story with her, isn’t it?
“Where is she?” I shoot to Angelo as I head towards the office door. “I need to make sure that she’s okay.”
“Wait, I’m not telling you anything until you admit that I was right about everything.”
“What?” I rake my fingers angrily through my hair. “What the hell are you talking about, Angelo?”
“I told you that Tami was perfect for you, and you sneered at her, saying that she was too young. But I can see it in your face. You care about her. There was something that happened on Friday, wasn’t there?”
“I don’t have time for this, Angelo. There’s a disaster here. I need to get out there and sort this out.”
He rests his hands on his hips and smirks, looking far too pleased with himself. “Admit it then. Tell me that I was right. Admit I know what’s best for you and you should listen to me more often.”
I roll my eyes and snort, trying to act like he isn’t right when we both know he is. He did push Tami on me, and I didn’t want to know. I tried to shove her off because I didn’t want to admit that she really might be the one for me in reality, even if she isn’t on paper. She shouldn’t be right for me, but somehow, she is.
“Alright fine, whatever. You were right. Does that make you happy? Can I sort this out now?”
“Yes, I knew it!” He fist pumps the air childishly. “See what I mean, Brad? You need to start letting us help you. You have spent so long looking after us, it’s our turn now. We want to take care of you.”
I narrow my eyes at him, unsure how to take this sudden outburst of genuine emotion from Angelo “You know, I will always be looking after you. That isn’t ever going to change.”
“But we can do the same.” He nods determinedly. “Now, Tami was by the water cooler when I saw her…”
&nbs
p; I’m gone before he can finish that sentence. I race past everyone else, fully knowing that they’re whispering about me, but I just don’t care. There’s only one person in mind and I need to see her.
“Where’s Tami?” I demand when she isn’t by the water cooler. “What’s going on?”
“Why?” one of the artists, Hayley, giggles childishly, causing me to want to fire her in an instant. I’m already all messed up and ice cold inside. She doesn’t need to make it worse. “Do you need her?”
“Yes, I do.” I shake my head sharply, letting everyone know that I’m not in the mood for their fucking joking. That can be dealt with later on once I make sure Tami is okay. “Now, where is she?”
The door to the women’s bathroom swings open and there she is, tear stained and looking very distressed. Sadness crushed through me, it’s utterly devastating to see her looking like her world has ended and knowing that I’m to blame. I lean and see Tawny and Beth looking far too pleased with themselves behind her.
“Tami,” I whisper as she looks at me with sheer horror. “Oh my God.”
“Please…” she whispers back, averting her eyes. “Please, don’t. All of you, stop it. Leave me alone.” She backs away, heading towards the exit. “I don’t want any of this.”
“Tami, no!” I call out as she turns and runs, the pressure getting too much for her. “Stop.”
When she doesn’t, I turn and glare at everyone in turn. Some people look guilty, like they know that they have gone too far, and others are still laughing. It’s really hard to contain the rage as I see that. How dare they think it’s okay to upset someone else? What is wrong with all of these people?