by W. J. May
She laughed quietly, tracing invisible shapes into his blanket. It felt good to laugh. After the last few days, it felt good to even smile. But the longer she sat there, the harder it was to do.
“Hey.” Gabriel dropped his playful banter at once, leaning forward instead with a look of concern. “What is it? What’s going on?”
Rae stared down at the blanket, feeling suddenly cold. “They forgave him. My father.” The edges of her world seemed to darken as a sharp breath caught in her chest. “Since he saved Devon’s life…they all forgave him.”
Gabriel said not a word. He looked neither surprised nor upset. He put his arm around her shoulders, but said nothing to soothe Rae.
“It’s so obvious,” Rae ranted on, well aware that she was preaching to the original choir. “It’s so obvious that he’s just manipulating the situation. But it’s like…it’s like they can’t see it.”
All evidence to the contrary, Gabriel acted the gentleman. He didn’t harken back to the time when he’d said those exact words himself. He didn’t show even a shred of frustration. He simply nodded once, lifting his eyes with a look of unending patience. “They won’t be able to,” he said without judgement or blame. When Rae looked at him questioningly, he shook his head. “It’s a powerful thing…when someone saves your life. It’s a debt you can’t shake easily. No matter how hard you try.” His voice trailed off near the end as his eyes lifted to stare vacantly out the window.
Rae’s heart tightened as she realized they were thinking about two different people. She was thinking about her father. He was thinking about Carter. “He really cared about you, you know,” she said quietly. “He always did.”
Gabriel looked back with a start, staring her up and down like he was worried she’d started to lose her grip. “Rae, your father hates me. Why would you possibly—”
“Carter,” she said quickly, flashing him a grim smile. “I meant Carter.”
The word hit like a battering ram, freezing them both. For a second, Gabriel dropped his arm off her shoulder and simply stared at her, looking as though he would have given anything in that moment to be anywhere else, then he bowed his head with a quiet, “Oh.”
A suffocating silence overtook them once more.
They hadn’t talked about Carter since that day at the factory. As far as Rae knew, Gabriel hadn’t talked about it with anyone. The second they’d gotten back on English soil, he’d locked himself away. Barricading himself in his apartment so long, she was afraid he’d never come out.
She couldn’t blame him. Gabriel’s life had changed forever that day. The moment Carter leapt in front of him, taking the lethal bullet into himself. It had changed in ways he couldn’t begin to imagine. In ways he didn’t want to imagine.
“Don’t be too hard on them, Rae.” He finally managed to break the silence, looking up at her with a tight smile. “They want to see the best in people. That’s a good thing. It’s not something you ever want to change.”
“But you knew,” she insisted, staring hard into his eyes, “you knew all along. You know what he is, that he hasn’t reformed. You tried to warn us—”
“People don’t change,” he said simply. “They are what they are. To hope for something different…Rae, it will only hurt you. Every time.”
A profound sadness swept through her from head to toe, flooding into every bit of open space in her body. It was a heartbreaking perspective to have, and yet he meant it. Those words that might sound so foreign or scripted to others had kept him alive.
She stared at him, wishing she could erase all the pain and hurt inside of him. “You changed.”
Gabriel looked up in surprise, his emerald eyes sweeping over her before hardening with a humorless laugh. “Yeah. That would make things easier, wouldn’t it?”
It was cold and rhetorical, but she couldn’t help but respond. The Gabriel Alden she knew now was entirely different from the man who’d broken her out of jail. The one who wouldn’t let down his guard for anything. The one who’d hid his murderous plans behind a charming smile.
That Gabriel had wanted to take her life. This Gabriel would do anything to save it.
“You have, Gabriel. It’s not just me. We all see it.” Her breath caught in her chest for a moment before she reached out to take his hand. “Carter saw it, too.”
A look of unspeakable sorrow tightened his handsome face, dimming the very light in his eyes, before Rae realized he was going to deliberately shift the conversation in another direction. Gabriel didn’t do well with conversations of the heart, or any seriousness that didn’t involve trying to kill someone.
“What’s the plan with Samantha? What’re we going to do?”
Rae leaned back against the headboard with a sigh, stretching out her legs as she gazed up at the ceiling. “I honestly don’t know. We’ll have to wait and see.”
“She’ll be back.”
“I know.” Rae pressed her lips together tightly.
They contemplated this for a while. Sitting in a troubled silence. Staring out the window.
Finally, when it could go on no longer, Rae turned to him with a little smile. “The last time I was here, I was a wolf.”
Gabriel glanced back at her with a grin, drops of water still clinging to the tips of his lashes. “You ate my duvet.”
* * *
For the next two weeks, the house by the park fell into a strange sort of rhythm. One where everyone kept their heads down and played their part, even though no one knew how much longer that could possibly last. Travel was limited, unofficial curfews were established, and visibility was kept to a minimum as, together, they waited for that last proverbial straw to break.
Alicia was nowhere to be found. After a few more days of watching Julian suffer, Rae had gotten on the phone and called up the acting mission commander for the Privy Council. It was like Gabriel had said. She had been sent deep undercover to keep watch on a trio of agents, and wouldn’t be back for the next few weeks.
Meaning that Julian was having a long recovery.
Rae felt horrible. She couldn’t remember the last time one of them had been forced to wait it out and heal just like a normal person. By the end of the first week, he was drafting up comical versions of a will. By the end of the second week, he was ready to search the globe for Alicia himself.
But there were positive steps as well. On only the fourth or fifth day, he and Tristan had buried the hatchet. It was a memory which still brought tears of laughter to Rae’s eyes.
Devon’s father had come by early in the morning, the same thing he’d done every day since he’d unintentionally buried a knife in his son’s best friend. He’d breezed through the door to find Devon, Rae, and Molly settled on a blanket in the backyard, watching with great amusement as their beloved Julian finally succumbed to the wonders and delights of conjured narcotics.
“I just don’t understand,” Julian was saying, gesticulating with grand motions he didn’t seem to notice himself, “what if you happened to be accidentally leaning against the platform? You weren’t expecting anything extraordinary, you were just leaning. Would you melt through then?”
Rae shook her head as Molly leaned forward with a serious frown.
“No, you wouldn’t. It not like you can trip into the wall and accidentally find yourself on the path to wizarding greatness. It has to be intentional.”
The others talked about these things in the hypothetical. Molly did not.
Julian nodded, his eyes as wide as saucers.
“Well what about the phone booth, then? The one that gets you down into the Ministry of Magic? What if you were walking past and simply happened to place a call?”
Devon shot Rae an exasperated grin as their friends began discussing it at great length.
“Why did you have to show him those movies?” Devon muttered, leaning over to whisper in her ear. “There was a reason I kept them from him. He’s going to obsess for weeks.”
“You can’t stifle his magic,
Devon.” Rae removed his arm from her shoulder, turning back to Julian with a theatrical smile. “All he has to do is believe.”
The magic was slightly lost on her fiancé.
“Well, I’ve been to King’s Cross Station,” Devon replied with a smirk, “many times. Trust me, Jules, there’s nothing inherently fantastical about that place.”
“Maybe you just weren’t looking,” Julian mused, staring off into the distance as a whole world of possibilities opened before him. “You could have stumbled upon something amazing…”
Devon clapped him on the shoulder with a grin. “I could have stumbled upon hepatitis.”
A throat cleared softly and they turned around to see Tristan hovering in the doorway, wearing a faint smile. One foot was inside, and one was out, as if he wasn’t sure where he’d be allowed. “I can see I’m interrupting something important…”
Molly stood up with a grin, dusting off her pants as she headed inside to make them all a pitcher of lemonade. “Julian had never seen Harry Potter. Thinks he’s missed his calling.”
“Ah, I see.” Tristan flashed her an indulgent grin before settling down on the patio furniture. Close enough to be part of the conversation, but far enough away so as not to cause any alarm. “This a part of your recovery, then?”
“A critical part,” Julian answered, his eyes growing heavy as his head fell absentmindedly upon Rae’s shoulder. It had been his longest day so far out of bed, and the drugs were beginning to get on top of him. “Actually, we should watch the rest of them, just to be…” He trailed off, running his fingers through her dark hair with a look of pure wonder. “Rae, your hair is really soft.”
Devon’s eyes twinkled as Rae kissed the back of his hand with an affectionate smile. “Why, thank you. And we’ll watch all the movies. Whatever you want.”
As if to second his enthusiasm, Annie-the-puppy, who had joined them in the yard, promptly reappeared. Wagging her tail with fierce pride, she presented Devon a mouthful of flowers she’d painstakingly uprooted from the garden.
He took them with a beaming smile. “Good girl!”
It never failed to crack Rae up. The special voice he’d developed just to communicate with their dog. He praised and cooed, ruffling her golden fur as she puffed out her little chest with pride.
“Look who found the flowers again!”
Julian looked on with a detached sort of amusement. “It’s a good thing we bought this place,” he said to himself. “Otherwise we’d never get the freakin’ huge security deposit back.”
Rae grinned, gently helping him to his feet. “I think that boat pretty much sailed the first time Molly used her tatù in the house.”
“You watch your tongue!” Devon scolded with a wink, holding the dog against his chest with an adorable smile. “Annie’s on a mission just like the rest of us.”
Julian and Rae exchanged a quick look, but between the puppy and narcotics they could think of not a single suitable response. Instead, they simply waved and limped towards the house, giving Tristan a parting nod as they passed him by.
But, as it turned out, Tristan hadn’t come to see his son. He’d come to see Julian. He leapt to his feet as Rae reached for the door, and quickly steadied the psychic’s other arm.
“Julian, I was hoping you might have a minute.” He stood politely to the side, his face friendly and nervous at the same time.
Julian’s lovely eyes latched on him with a curious stare, glassed over from the two vials of morphine Rae had given him before breakfast. “Did you want to watch the movies, too?”
Tristan stifled a grin and shook his head, taking a step back to see him better. But the more he did, the more that grin faded from his face. Replaced with something serious. Something sad. “Julian, I’m so sorry.”
His tone abruptly shifted the mood of the happy little yard, and Julian stiffened as the shield of narcotics lifted momentarily from his mind. “It’s all right,” he said softly.
Tristan’s face tightened painfully, and he reached out without thinking and squeezed the psychic’s shoulder. No matter how distant he and Devon might have been over the last few years, the man had watched the two boys grow up. Julian was like a second son. “No, it isn’t. Of course it isn’t,” he murmured, shaking his head. “Julian, I can’t even begin to tell you how—”
“It’s okay; you weren’t yourself.” The words were quiet, but sincere. It looked like Julian had honestly dismissed it. Forgiven it without thought. While he was still bleeding.
Tristan’s face tightened again, and he looked him up and down. “That’s unbelievably generous,” he said softly, “but you don’t have to—”
“We don’t get mad at people for that around here.”
The words rang out in the sunny little yard, resonating with every person inside. Even Molly stopped in the doorway, clutching the lemonade as her face softened into a thoughtful frown.
It was true. How many times had Samantha’s power been turned against them? How many times had they done things they could never take back? Things they could never hope to repair?
The only answer was forgiveness. Blind, extraordinary forgiveness.
Julian had that in spades.
Plus, he was still a little high.
“Besides,” he continued conversationally, “I always figured you kind of wanted to. Ever since I accidentally backed your car into the pond over that Christmas break.”
There was a sudden silence. Followed by a tentative smile.
“That was you?” Tristan’s face lightened in amused disbelief as his son paled and discreetly angled behind the puppy. “I always thought it was Devon.”
Julian shook his head, oblivious to the desperate looks his best friend was giving him from across the yard. “No, it was me. We figured Devon should take the fall because you wouldn’t expel your own son. Or kill him.”
Ironically, both assumptions hit a little too close to home, but Julian was too disoriented to realize it. He simply leaned into Rae with a sleepy smile, tangling his fingers distractedly in her hair.
Tristan pursed his lips with a bemused smile. “And you figured now was the right moment to tell me?”
Julian nodded, wide-eyed and solemn. “It seemed like an appropriate time.”
Rae quickly steered him back into the house before either one of them could hear the repercussions of that little confession. Switching into a strength tatù, she helped guide him slowly up the stairs, before laying him down gently on his bed.
“Angel?”
“She’s still at Gabriel’s.”
“Good.” He closed his eyes a moment. “I’m glad she has him for a brother.”
“Me, too.” Rae watched him a moment. “You ready for some more?” she asked, conjuring a vial.
He glanced at it then shook his head, closing his eyes once again. “Nah, I’m spinning already.” Instead, he simply opened his arms, a silent invitation.
Without a second thought Rae kicked off her shoes and nestled into him, curling his strong arms around herself with a contented smile. They lay there in a comfortable silence for what seemed like a small eternity. Relaxed in each other’s company. Safe, if only for a fleeting moment.
“It’s weird, huh?” he murmured, letting out a peaceful sigh.
She glanced up curiously, studying his handsome face. “What is?”
He opened his eyes, and looked down at her with a fleeting smile. “Did you ever think when we met at Guilder that we’d end up here? That our lives would be like this?”
She hesitated a moment, snuggling deeper into his arms, lost in thought. “No. I don’t think anyone could have predicted this.”
There was a beat of silence, followed by a silent laugh that shook Julian’s chest slightly. “Well…it sucks.”
She glanced up again before joining in, too, keeping her weight carefully off his chest as the two of them fell to pieces. For a moment, the surreal absurdity of their situation washed away every other emotion, and they laugh
ed until they could laugh no more.
When they finally quieted down, the silence hit hard. Just as hard as the sudden laughter. The two of them froze for a moment, thinking again, before he gave her a swift kiss on the forehead.
“One way or another, there’s no one I’d rather be here with than all of you.”
She squeezed his arm as unexpected tears blurred her eyes. “Live for the moment, right?”
He laughed again, shifting painfully as his chest began to bleed. “Yeah…live for the moment.”
Chapter 9
Live for the moment, right?
The next morning Rae knocked on the door of her best friend’s apartment, prepared to say the words that Molly Skye had been waiting her entire life to hear. Two coffees were clutched in her hands, and her foot tapped nervously against the floor as she waited in the hall. Wondering, for the millionth time, why she didn’t already have a key. There was a faint shuffling on the other side, followed by an irritated, “I’ll get it—I’m only pregnant,” before it swung open, revealing a petite redhead dressed in a Gucci bathrobe and a pair of Donald Duck slippers. The bathrobe had been a gift from Rae. The slippers from Luke.
For a moment both girls simply stood there, staring at each other.
“Rae?” Molly asked curiously, glancing up and down the hallway to see if anyone had come with her. “What are you doing up so early? It’s not even—”
“Will you help me pick out a wedding dress?”
It was like the heavens had opened. Like that fateful gong had finally been rung.
Molly’s jaw dropped all the way to the floor as her eyes simultaneously widened to take up at least half of her face. A strange gasping sound tore its way out of her body and she started trembling head to toe, rattling the enormous curlers still pinned in her hair.
“Are you kidding?” She snatched up her purse and joined Rae out in the hall, her eyes flashing electric fire. “Let’s do this.”
Rae burst out laughing. “One sec there, Molls.” She made her best friend go back inside long enough to remove the curlers from her hair and throw on some clothes. Luke was unceremoniously woken and sent away to ‘play with the boys’ before the two girls clinked their coffees together and headed off down the street.