by Holly Rayner
“You know full well to whom! The two of you didn’t have words did you?”
He smiled then and said, “Don’t worry. I was nice. I’m a very nice person, you know.”
I narrowed my eyes and said, “You promise?”
“Yes, I promise. What kind of ass do you think I am? I am a nice guy. I even poured him a cup of coffee.”
“Aw, thank you.” I was relieved. I didn’t want anything else, especially something silly, to come between Seth and I.
“I have to say though; I have no idea what you see in him. I mean, I guess he’s a good-looking guy… but lots of us are…”
I sat down with my coffee and took a sip. Looking at him over the rim of the cup I said, “You know the feeling of being in someone’s embrace that makes the world stop on its axis? There is no time, it just stops. Your mind is at peace and everything you feel for this person is pure and unselfish… you feel completely free for the first time in your life. When you hold them, you feel safe and warm and you feel like you’re home.”
Grant was looking at me funny then, like he was trying to arrange his words before he said them. Lately he’d had a look in his eye that I just couldn’t interpret. It was somewhere between pain and lust. I was pretty sure he didn’t lust after me. He’d never tried anything, as many times as we’d been alone together. Surely he didn’t develop a crush all of a sudden. He finally said, “Yeah… I’m afraid that I do know that feeling.” I was getting a really strange vibe from him this morning. He’d always told me that he’d never been in love. I wondered if there was something he hadn’t told me.
“That’s how I feel about Seth,” I told him.
He put his coffee cup down and then he smiled at me. It looked forced at first, but then in his silly voice he said, “Tell me you’ve decided to name your first born after me.”
I laughed at the image of me telling Seth that and said, “No offense, but I’m not so sure Seth would be happy about that. Besides, we haven’t even discussed marriage, much less children.” That look was there again. The pain. “Is everything okay with you?” I asked him. “How is Juniper?”
His grin was fake as he said, “She’s amazing. Maybe I’ll rush to the altar before you do.” With that, he got up and kissed me on top of the head. He let his lips linger there for a moment and then he said, “I’ll see you later. I’m off for my run.” I watched him go with my brows drawn together, still wondering what was going on with him.
I spent the rest of the day “off” cleaning the house and doing laundry. I had never felt the need to hire someone to do things like that for me, but lately with all that was going on, it had suffered. I was running out of undergarments. Grant didn’t come back and I began worrying more about him throughout the day. I knew it was silly. He’s a grown man. He and I had never checked up on each other… but he’d been so strange lately. I was thinking about calling him when my phone rang. It was Seth, and at the sound of his voice, all my worries were gone and I was happy again.
“Hi baby,” he said. His voice was so sexy and the sound of him calling me “baby” sent a shudder down my spine.
“Hey gorgeous, how was your day?” I hoped he had a good day, but I also hoped it was a productive one.
“Well, I spent the morning with Harlan. He called all of the shareholders and told them about our plan. They’re all on board. We’re not sure who has been sharing things with Liz, but with as much information as they had in the disclosure file, he says it’s safe to assume we have a mole. We can’t withhold from the shareholders, so we just have to say a prayer it’s not one of them and we won’t mention anything at the staff meeting with the executives on Monday. Harlan has already started the paperwork ball rolling.”
“Good,” I said. “Are they all on board with the plan?”
“Harlan said most of them are giddy about it. I didn’t realize how many enemies Rick Taylor has in this city. It won’t bode well for Liz’s future, I’m afraid.”
“Hmm, that’s too bad for her, really.” I did honestly, for some strange reason regret she would be hurt by all of this. “But, I’m glad whatever it is people dislike about Rick is working in our favor.”
“So am I,” he said. “I’m really confident that this will all be settled soon and we can move on with our lives.”
“I can’t wait,” I said.
“Me neither. I literally can’t wait,” he said.
“Literally?” I asked with a giggle.
“Never mind,” he said. “So do you have plans for dinner?”
“Not one,” I told him.
“Good, I want to cook for you.” I laughed and he said, “I’m serious.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I just… you cook? Really?”
He laughed then and said, “I’m no chef, but I’ve been known to throw a meal or two together.”
“Alright then, that sounds good. What time should I be there?”
“Six, if you want to help.”
“I will see you then,” I said.
“Bring a toothbrush,” he said. “I doubt that I’ll let you leave until after we’ve had our breakfast.”
“Mm, that sounds even better.” I wasn’t going to bring Grant up, but somehow I just let it slip out, “Hey Seth… did you talk to Grant this morning before you left my place?”
“Yeah, sort of. We had a cup of coffee together. He was kind of strange, but I usually find him that way. I was happy he was clothed.”
I laughed and said, “He is different, I’ll admit that. But he was extra strange to me this morning too. I was just afraid the two of you had words. He said no, but…”
“He’s right. No harsh words anyways. I’ve given up the crazy notion that you’re sleeping with him, if that’s what you mean.”
“No, I hadn’t thought you were still worried about that. I’m glad though. I was worried Grant may have said something rude or inappropriate to you. He does get protective like a brother.”
“He was actually perfectly nice,” Seth said. “I have a theory though… do you want to hear it?”
“Okay… sounds ominous.”
“It is, kind of,” he said. “I think your roommate does not want to be your brother. I think Grant is in love with you.”
“What? I just told you, Seth… nothing is going on between us. Nothing ever has.”
“And I believe you. I trust you and I know you love me. That means I have nothing to worry about. But as a man, I also know that he’d have to be crazy to not be in love with you. And, anyone with eyes can see the way he looks at you. His feelings for you just might be the source of his weirdness, since you and I are close again.”
“I can’t believe that’s true and I never noticed. I would have noticed, right?”
Seth laughed, “Not if he hasn’t said or done anything, I guess. You probably didn’t pick up on what the look in his eyes meant because you don’t see yourself the way the rest of us do,” he said. “I find that charming, but difficult to understand since I’ve always loved myself.” He laughed.
“Should I talk to him about it?”
“That would have to be up to you baby. That would be a hard conversation for you both. But, if you’re going to continue living with him…”
Grant came in the door then, just in time to save me from that conversation. “I’ll talk to you tonight, okay?”
“Okay Adele, I love you.”
“I love you too.” I was looking at Grant’s face when I said that and I realized as he winced that Seth was right. How in the world did this happen?
“Hi!” I greeted Grant as he came in the door. “That was a long run.”
He grinned and said, “I’m superman, didn’t you know?”
“Oh! I forgot,” I said. He always covered his feelings with jokes. I should have paid more attention to his eyes.
“I’m going to hit the shower.”
“Grant, when you’re finished showering, can we talk?”
“Okay… what about?”
“I just need to talk to you. You stink though, so go shower.” He grinned again and headed for his bedroom.
“Hey,” I called after him. “You didn’t really go for a six hour run, did you?”
“Nah, I spent four or five hours sitting on a bench in the park, feeding the pigeons. I need to start wearing Bermuda shorts and socks with sandals.”
I rolled my eyes. “Get in the shower.”
I fixed us some tea and cookies on a platter and when he came back out I said, “You want to talk out on the balcony?”
“Sure,” he said, grabbing a cookie off the tray. He followed me out to the balcony. It was a beautiful day. The air was crisp but not cold. It had just enough bite to it to remind us that the seasons would soon be changing. We sat down at the little bistro table and being silly and using the voice of the Joker in one of the Batman movies he said, “Why so serious?” I smiled and he said, “That’s better. I love that beautiful smile. You okay?”
“I’m okay,” I told him. I was feeling foolish for not realizing his feelings for me, but I was okay. “I’m worried about you, my friend.”
“Why?” He looked genuinely confused.
“You haven’t seemed yourself lately and when I mentioned it to Seth…”
“You talk to Seth about me?” He obviously didn’t like that idea.
“No,” I started to lie. Then I realized that friends didn’t lie to friends and I said, “I mean, yeah, I guess. I talk to him about everything. I am just worried about you though, it’s nothing bad.”
He still didn’t look okay with it, but he let it go and said, “There’s nothing to worry about. I’m fine.”
“Can I tell you Seth’s theory?”
“I’m dying to hear it,” he said, sarcastically.
I ignored the sarcasm and said, “He says he thinks you’re in love with me.” There, I said it. Let him laugh at me and tell me how vain I am. At least it will be a conversation starter. I realized after a few seconds that he wasn’t laughing. As a matter of fact, he was staring at me with a strange expression on his face again.
Finally, he said, “Is he accusing us of things again?”
“No! Oh no, nothing like that. He believes there is nothing between us other than friendship but he thinks you’re sad maybe because he and I are doing well together at last…”
“I’m happy for you, Adele,” he said. “I hated seeing you so unhappy when the two of you broke up. I love to see you smile.”
“I know. I know you’re happy for me. I don’t want this to be about me. I want it to be about you for once. I owe you,” I said with a smile, trying to lighten the mood. It didn’t work, his thoughtful look deepened.
“Just because a person falls in love with another person, it doesn’t mean they belong together.” Did he just admit to being in love with me? Or was he talking about me and Seth? He knew me so well that he read my look and said, “Don’t worry; I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be with Seth.”
“So what are you saying, Grant?”