by Eva Morian
The house had been filled with more screams than ever that morning. Now, both were swaddled, asleep, and Cherish could finally sit down. As soon as her butt hit the sofa, she melted against the soft cushions and slowly leaned her head back with a deserved groan. Silence was true bliss. A solid second in the parental running which fell right beneath a shower, something she’d get to enjoy when Margaret arrived.
The fragile quiet was threatened as the rings from Simon’s office phone echoed out. Quickly, she lifted her head, hopped off the sofa, and passed the kids in a swift jog, “No, no, no, no…” Opening one of the doors, the ringing only intensified as she rounded his desk and quickly picked up the receiver, “H-hold on.” She said to whoever was on the line. Setting it down on the desk, she paced across the room, shut the door, and returned to his chair. Sitting down, she cleared her throat and placed the phone to her ear again, “Hello?” she asked.
The sounds of a car engine roared in the background as Margaret tapped her fingers on the steering wheel, “Cherish? Hello sunshine! I’m just letting you know that I’m picking up some lunch and I’ll be there in about half an hour. Kohls was having this wonderful little sale so I popped in for a minute and bought…well I spent about two hundred dollars on a new kitchen set I don’t need.” She replied.
Cherish listened to Margaret before she calmly hummed, “Oh no. It’s fine, take your time. I just put the kids down so—”
“—Oh! I’m going to let you enjoy that quiet time then! I know how precious it is! Be there with lunch soon.” She interjected before the line went dead.
Cherish pulled the phone from her ear while she muttered, “Oh, okay.” Before she could take her hand off the receiver, it rang again. She yelped and quickly smacked a hand over her mouth while her heart hammered in her chest. She rolled her eyes up as it rang once again before she picked it up once more, “Uh, y-yes, hello?”
“Cherish, it’s good to hear your voice. At least I know you survived.” He teased. Grinning, he eased up and rested his elbows against the desk, “So tell me all about it. How were they? Was Jr. a handful? Is Jasmine being good for you?” He questioned while not paying any attention to a call from Imani on another line.
Cherish relaxed a bit at the sound of Simon’s voice, “Right now they’re asleep and I want to keep it that way. Your son atomic shit himself not long after you left. That was fun. I think the stink has seeped into my clothes so when your mom gets here I’m going to shower up. But we’re all doing good.” She answered.
Simon laughed out loud and they both knew it was because he wasn’t there, and luck didn’t seem to be on her side, “Jr. was just being a generous boy.” He said.
“Generous my ass!” she snipped back before her laughs echoed with his. Cherish yawned and leaned against the back of the chair, “How about you? Is everything alright? They haven’t eaten you alive, have they?” she asked.
Simon glanced over to the corner of his office. He was more aware of how well liked he was than he originally thought, “Not at all. I…they brought me gifts. Everyone is really understanding and they’re going easy on me. But, I miss you guys. I’m trying to get my head back into it and I did well for a while, but I can’t really think straight.” He replied.
Cherish rocked from one side to the other as she stared out of the French doors windows at the crib, “Oh yeah? They’re nice to do that, but I get it, you know? I admit that I’m lonely too. The kids are doing these weird faces and I always find myself calling for you, but you’re not here…” Sighing, she scratched at the side of her head, “It sucks. I thought this would be easier, but the kids miss you. We all do.” She replied.
Simon thought for a moment that Cherish would encourage him to stay at work and push him to go hard. But, when he heard that she and the kids missed and needed him, that made up his mind, “I think I’m going to come home. I’ll…work in my office.” He said. Releasing a pent-up sigh, he looked around his desk and confirmed his decision; nodding, “Yeah, I’ll be home soon, okay?” he asked while gathering his folders.
Cherish perked up almost automatically, even though she knew she shouldn’t have, “Yeah?” she asked. She rubbed her lips together and tried to hold back a smile, “A-are you sure? What about your mom, she said she was on her way.” She asked.
“Let her know I’m coming home and that she doesn’t need to go. Though, I’m pretty sure she’s going to go anyway because she’d do anything to see the babies.” He answered.
"Alright. Nice try, there's no point in saying a word." She replied.
Simon was in a much better mood. Standing, he wrapped up the phone call, “I’ll see you soon, Cherish.” He said hanging up. He double checked if he had left anything and ran his finger along the top of Emily’s photo while he passed. He was prepared to tell Imani the change of plans on his way out when he opened his office door.
Susan had her hand lifted mid-knock. Her hair was styled, and she was dressed in a tight gray pencil skirt, teal jacket, and chunky jewelry. Her blue eyes stared up at Simon through her blonde hair and a straight, white tooth smile broke across her features, "Simon Gabot, aren't you a sight for sore eyes. It’s so good to see you back at work with your second family." She greeted. Eyeing the papers in his hands, she blinked for a moment, "I was going to ask you out for lunch, but it seems you're already headed somewhere. A meeting?"
“Oh, hello Susan I wasn’t expecting you to uh…” He thought about Cherish, but was also hungry, “…I was going to head home and work there. I’m having trouble adjusting.” He said tapping his head with a sigh.
"Home?" Susan questioned.
Turning, he returned into the office and caught his briefcase. Snapping the locks, he lifted it open and placed the folders within. He then caught a glance to the presents he’d forgotten, “I’m a bit scattered.” He admitted.
She stepped into the room behind him with an arched eyebrow and a soft pout on her lips. Pacing to him, she took a hold of his case and other items in his hands, "Let's take a breath, shall we?" Inhaling a deep breath, she lifted her hands higher across her torso before she lowered them and blew out. With her encouragement, Simon followed her instruction. Susan gave a smile, "Now. No one is expecting you to sit behind this desk when you have a son at home who needs his father. So much has changed, Simon. We aren't going to slap an S on your and expect you to save the day. Now, If you want to go home, That's fine, but take your time. Eat something."
He took a moment to ease his excitement and thought the situation through. His stomach did feel tight, “I’m hungry to be honest.” He stated. Glancing around, he remembered the lunch Cherish had given him. Making his way over to the mini fridge along the wall of cabinets, he pulled out the bag and proceeded to untie the handles. He opened the lid and lit up from the reminiscent scent, “I could eat lunch before I go.” He debated with himself.
Susan rubbed her hands together as she eyed the meal, "Oh, did you make that yourself? You could always save that and have lunch. On me." She offered.
Simon shook his head as he replaced the lid, “Cherish made it.” he corrected.
Susan's face fell flat while his back was turned. The charity case made his food? She rolled her jaw from one side to the other before she lifted her head in the air.
He thought about Susan’s offer and didn’t mind being treated to a meal. Especially since that meant Cherish wouldn’t have to cook him lunch the next day. “That’s really nice of you to offer, thank you Susan.” He stated putting his food away.
Forcing a smile as he agreed, she clasped her hands together, "Sure, I'm so happy you said yes.” She said.
Simon took a firm hold of his briefcase and flattened his tie, “Did you have anywhere in mind?” he questioned.
Susan opened the door and allowed him to pass, “What do you have a taste for?” she answered with a question of her own.
Simon thought it over, “Barbeque would hit the spot.” He stated.
Following Susan down the hall
and around the corner, Simon stopped at Imani’s desk, “I’m going for lunch and then home for the night. Oh, and I have some of the files you gave me. I’ll look them over tonight.” He said with a wave.
Imani smiled at Simon with a few leaves of her salad poking between her lips, "Oh sure! Have a good day! See you tomorrow!" She called after them.
Susan walked by Imani coolly and stepped into the elevator. Following, she pressed the Lobby button while Simon clicked B afterwards, “We should pick somewhere quick because I can’t stay long.” He expressed.
There was a glare towards Imani from Susan as the doors shut. She then turned her attention to Simon, "Why? Is there somewhere you need to be? We could get take out.” She suggested.
“Yes, I need to get home to my family.” He answered straight forwardly.
Susan smiled at his profile before facing forward, “Did you get the email full of daycares I sent you? Which one did you select?" She asked.
Simon did his best to remember if he’d even turned his computer on in the last six weeks and shook his head, “I don’t remember getting an email like that. I don’t think I mentioned using a daycare, did I?” he asked.
"Well no, you didn't. I just assumed you would need one with Emily's passing and all. I just wanted to be as helpful as I could. So, how long have you and Emily known...I'm sorry her name is Charity, right?" She asked.
“Oh…” He understood her intentions now though he corrected her with a smile as he thought of Cherish, “Cherish actually. Though, Charity is nice too. We met her in Emily’s third trimester, and she was very taken with her.”
"Oh, well that's nice to know. It’s so nice of you to give her a handout." She stated as the elevator opened on the lobby floor. Susan stepped out and paused. She glanced back at Simon who stayed behind, "Simon? What is it? Did you want to ride together?" She asked.
Simon caught on to Susan’s questions, how she regarded Cherish at the baby shower, and the “mistake” of her name on several occasions. The look of disappointment on his face caused her own expression to drop. She already knew what he was going to say before he opened his mouth.
Even though he tried to keep civility, when she said handout, that made him not to go with her at all, “Look, Susan. I don’t know what has rubbed you the wrong way about Cherish, or if you’re just looking out for us, but I promise you that she can be trusted. She’s a wonderful person. So please, ease up on her. I’m sure if you got to know her, you’d love her.” He said. Sighing, he stayed behind and tightened his grip on the briefcase, “I’m going home. Thank you for offering, but I’m going to take a rain check on lunch.” He said.
Susan turned her body to face him and held her hand out between the elevator doors. She was taken aback by how he stood up for a female he barely knew, and not a colleague he’d worked closely with before. Still, she struck a nerve with him and that was unacceptable in her book. Her tone quickly changed sweeter while she cleared her throat, “Oh Simon, I didn’t mean the way it came out. It’s just I do worry about you with all that’s happened. So…forgive me that I’m looking at this situation with a critical eye. I am simply seeing this whole circumstance in a different light than you…” She cleared her throat and swallowed her resentment, “…and I’m sure Cherish is a lovely girl.” She replied. She wasn’t going to try and push him away. Pulling her hand away, she stood there and gave him the best smile she could muster, “I understand if you need to get home. We can plan a better time for lunch. I’ll hold you to that rain check.” She stated.
To Simon, Susan’s explanation and reasoning was just as he thought. He was glad to know that she did care and looked out for him and his family, but he was sure Cherish was someone he wanted in his life and who he could trust. He was relieved that Susan let him off the hook so easily, stayed put, and gave a friendly wave, “I’m sure you will. Well, have a great night Susan and I’ll see you the next time I’m in the office.” He replied.
Susan gave him a reserved smile which turned to bitter resentment after the doors shut, “I’m sure you will.” She stated.
Simon felt as though he was home free. He placed the gifts on the floor in front of the passenger seat and his briefcase on the cushion beside him. Driving home, an excitement that he couldn’t deny welled within him. For the first time in forever, everything was looking up for him, but somewhere, in the back of his mind, realization hit him. He was happy to be home and Emily wasn’t there.
Suddenly, he felt overwhelmed with guilt.
He was a terrible husband and he wondered if he was ever worthy to love her if he could move on with the world so soon. Although his first day of work wasn’t how it usually would be, there was a sense of calm which had returned. Everything and everyone was moving on without her, including himself, and he felt weighed down by the idea.
Pulling over, he fumbled with his glasses and tossed them on the dashboard. With both hands over his face he sobbed and apologized to the woman he loved repeatedly. Some time later, after he’d released the pressure of his grief, Simon’s tears dried, but he was numb; again. Putting the car into drive, he was on autopilot until he pulled into his driveway and parked. He gripped the steering wheel, he got out, and lugged the gifts inside with him. He purposefully bypassed the side door and took the long way around to the front to give him time to reestablish himself.
Taking a deep breath, he prepared to face his mother and Cherish. Walking through the door looking worse for wear, he set everything onto the floor and took a couple of steps inside. All he sought for was Jr. and Jasmine. He needed them.
The atmosphere inside of the home was calm and quiet. The television played a soap opera that his mother had years of investment in. She faithfully watched or recorded it at the same time every day no matter how ridiculous the storyline had deviated. The babies, having just been fed and cleaned, were side by side in their swings facing the sofa. There were takeout containers on the countertop and his mother sitting there with a plate and fork in her hand.
She glanced over towards the front door oddly and looked at her son, “Hello Simon. How was…” Seeing the state he was in, Margaret paused the television and stood. She set her plate down on an end table and rounded closer towards him. Catching sight of the gifts, she paused before cautiously speaking, “What are those?”
“My employees send their condolences. There are treats in there if you want some. I know how you love brownies.” He answered. Margaret glanced down at the desserts wrapped in plastic and tied with a bright, red bow. She wasn’t entirely worried about them as she was her son, but when he passed her by she knew it was better to leave him alone.
Who he searched for came into view from over the sofa. Both of their heads slowly turned to the long, black shadow in front of them. Simon crouched between both swings and leaned over to look at Jasmine, “Hello bright eyes.” He whispered. Upon recognizing him, Jasmine broke into an expressive and genuinely happy smile. Simon chuckled a bit to himself as he rubbed his fingers along the slight wisps of hair on her head.
Looking to Jr., he leaned into his swing and rubbed a knuckle across his face, “Hey there buddy.” He stated. Jr.’s blue eyes stared up at his daddy before he followed suit with Jasmine and broke into a crooked grin. Though his eyes watered, Simon felt the tension disappear. There was a moment of clarity where he knew that, no matter what, everything would be okay. Emily might’ve been gone, but he could be strong. Just as the two miracles he’d come to love. He could be normal and himself again.
Picking up the treats and his briefcase, Margaret set them up on the dining table before she paused and turned to face Simon again. Smiling to herself, she watched him lay attention and affection on the kids. She crossed her arms loosely and stood behind him, “Cherish wanted to take a quick nap before you got back. She’s upstairs.” She whispered while pressing a hand to his shoulder.
Simon turned his head and glanced at the wall hiding the stairs. Reluctantly letting go of the pair, he stood up and nodde
d to. Passing by his mother, he went upstairs to find Cherish. She was the other he had looked forward to seeing.
Quietly, he stepped into the room and saw the unmistakable puff of fluffy black curls resting on her side of the bed. Laying on her stomach, her arms were bent and tucked beneath the pillow. Her body made the figure four on the mattress which was a blessing when he wasn’t home, and she wasn’t breastfeeding. Walking around the bed with soft steps, he paused when he saw her face; beautifully at peace. Smiling affectionately, he couldn’t imagine her ever being a danger to him or his family. He wholeheartedly trusted her.
He watched her for a moment before he carefully sat down and rested a hand against her side. Reaching towards her head, he gently pressed his hand against her curls and rubbed her cheek with his thumb, “Cherish, I’m home. Do you want to wake up? I brought chocolate.” His soft tone coaxed her.
Barely feeling the shift in the bed, her eyebrows lightly tucked together when she heard his voice. Slowly and groggily, having been dead to the world, Cherish opened one eye and then the other. She looked up at Simon’s bespectacled face before it dawned on her who he was, “Oh, hey Simon. I got a whole twenty minutes of sleep.” She said. Pushing herself up onto her knees, she fell back on her bottom and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Looking to him. She ran a hand through her loose, silken curls and paused, “Your eyes are red. You were crying. What happened between the phone call and here? Are you alright?” she questioned.
Simon was taken back with how she noticed the minute details about him. Even his mother hadn’t said a word. Despite having gone through an emotional ordeal and left over pain in his heart, Simon looked Cherish in her brown eyes and nodded; feeling surer now that he said so aloud, “Don’t worry. I’m going to be alright.”