by E. A. Copen
Tell her, urged the voice in my head. Maybe my conscience.
I told it to shut up.
Come on, Laz. You swore not to lie to her.
Lies by omission aren’t covered by that particular magic. I almost felt proud of myself for skirting the magic that linked Emma and me…until I felt disgusted with myself for it. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched as Emma placed the coffee cup back on the little stand beside the sofa. Why was it so hard to tell her the truth about Odette?
Because you’re afraid she’ll leave. Why not? Everyone else had when I needed them most.
My thoughts ran into a wall, backed up and repeated. Since when did I decide I needed Emma? She was a good friend, a great cop. The best. Loyal to a fault. But to need someone in my life the way I felt like I needed her…
It wasn’t the same kind of destructive need I’d felt to be with Odette or the very confusing stop-and-go romantic need I had to be with Beth. Life just felt like it wouldn’t be complete without having her there to call on, to joke with. Hell, I’d been on my own just a short while and already I’d fallen off the straight and narrow path to steal cars and break into apartments. Emma was the puzzle piece of my life I hadn’t known I was missing. She kept me steady. Without that, I felt lost.
Just tell her. If she walks, she’s not who you thought she was anyway.
I cleared my throat. “So, remember when I said things with Odette were complicated?”
She nodded. “Uh-huh.”
“That’s because she’s sort of pregnant.”
Emma’s eyebrows shot up. At the same time, she somehow managed to squint. “Sort of pregnant?”
“Yeah. I’m also sort of terrified.” I shrugged and went to sit on the sofa next to her. “That and the ghoul bite is sort of why things went down the way they did at the shop when you got hurt. I didn’t want anyone else getting hurt because of me. I thought the best thing for everyone would be if I wasn’t around anymore.”
“Lazarus, how can you say that?”
I shrugged and hung my head. She wasn’t going to say anything to me that I hadn’t said to myself. I braced myself for when she decided to call me a selfish asshole.
Emma grabbed my hand instead. “The world isn’t better off without you. The world needs you. That kid that’s about to come into this world needs you. I need you.” Her eyes widened as if she just realized what she said. “I mean, who else am I supposed to call when monsters kill people?”
Nice save. “That’s me,” I said dryly. “Just call me Buffy.”
Footsteps came down the hall, and Emma retracted her hand just as Pony came around the corner.
“Should be here any minute.”
“Taking his time, huh?” I grumbled. “Sounds like The Baron. Knowing him, I’d be surprised if he gets here before dawn. I’ve never seen the guy lift a finger to do anything. Have you?”
“Uh…” Pony frowned.
I went on. “I mean, every damn time I need something, I’ve got to hunt him down. What gives? He’s the one who begged me to take this job. The least he could do would be to give me some sort of training or instruction instead of hiding like he’s scared all the damn time. Samedi’s the laziest Loa.”
Beth cringed.
Pony tugged at his collar. “I don’t know if I’d say lazy. Maybe low key.”
My eyes darted back and forth between Beth’s pained expression and Pony’s nervousness. “Dammit, he’s right behind me, isn’t he?”
In answer, a large, thin hand covered in white paint closed on my shoulder. “Lazy, am I?”
Emma jumped to her feet and fumbled to grab her gun until Pony grabbed her arm and shook his head at her.
I rose more casually, placing my hands in my pockets as I turned to face him. “Well, you’re not very much help, that’s for sure.”
The Baron hopped over the sofa to land gracefully on his behind on the cushion. “Trust me when I say I’m far more hands-on than you realize. I gave you your powers, and I had a suit made for you. A suit, I might add, that you ruined in mere hours.”
I crossed my arms. “You let Morningstar use me.”
“Morningstar?” Emma repeated.
The Baron ignored her. “I owed him a debt. The debt is repaid. You, on the other hand, are gaining a reputation for not paying yours. You should have seen Anubis’ face when he realized what you did.”
“I need to fix this.” I gestured to the arm where the bite was. Whatever boost I had gotten earlier was starting to wear off. The ache had begun to spread through my arm. Soon, I’d feel like a truck ran me over. The fever would return, and we’d have to head back to Faerie or else I’d turn.
The Baron swung his cane in front of him and leaned on it to shrug. “You’ve been to see Serkan. If he sang for you, then you know the easiest way to fix this is to seek out Khaleda Morningstar.”
“No.” I shook my head so hard it hurt. “No way. Not going there. There’s got to be another way.”
The Baron leaned harder into his cane, bloodshot white eyes regarding me without expression. “Perhaps. Whatever you do, it will take a lot of magic, more than you have. More than almost anyone in New Orleans has. However, there are options.”
“Could you help?” Baron Samedi was a Loa, and there were all kinds of stories about him preventing people from dying by refusing to dig their graves. Death wasn’t what was in store for me, however. It might be beyond even him.
“Afraid not.” The Baron’s accented voice was grave. “You would need ancient magic, the power of hundreds of souls. That magic is beyond me.”
My heart sank into my toes. That magic was beyond almost anyone. There were very few supernatural beings who commanded that many souls. I knew. I’d been to the auction where those souls were traded like currency.
My brain worked overtime, trying to remember the high rollers at the auction. Morningstar probably had the most souls. He seemed powerful enough. Getting anything from him, though, would require a deal and I already owed him.
The Faerie queens might. Nyx had been powerful, and her knight, Osric, acted like price wasn’t an object. Right now, the only queen I knew didn’t seem inclined to offer her power. If I brought her the assassin, however, I might be able to request a boon. She’d have to grant it to me if it was within her power to do so. That was my best option. Find the assassin and get Titania to lend her magic.
“Okay,” I said, tapping my chin, “assume I have the magic side taken care of. What else would need to be done for this?”
The Baron shrugged. “Not much. It would only cost you a limb.”
“A limb?” Beth paled.
“Yes, child. In theory, it should be possible for a powerful spell to draw the virus into a single part of the body and then amputate. That is how Khaleda’s spell would work, except it transfers the cost to another group of host cells. It’s simple thaumaturgy.”
Emma snapped her fingers. “If it’s thaumaturgy, couldn’t you just transfer it into something inanimate like a doll?”
I stared at her. Emma Knight didn’t use words like thaumaturgy. She was a staunch skeptic when it came to the supernatural. She barely believed in ghosts, and she’d seen them several times.
She grunted when she saw me looking at her. “I told you. It’s been a rough six weeks. I’ve had a lot of downtime, so I read.”
Baron Samedi rolled his eyes. “In any case, no, a doll would not work. It must be living tissue, linked to the original host either by some spell or genetics. There is no way to work around that. You either use a part of Lazarus and destroy that part, or you may transfer this to his offspring, either the one in Faerie, or one he makes anew.”
“No.” I left no room for interpretation and spoke as firmly as I could manage. “No one’s hurting any babies. We use me.”
“Lazarus—”
I cut Emma off with a shake of my head. “I can live with three limbs.” I turned to The Baron. “It is only one limb right?”
His frown dee
pened. “The further the disease progresses, the more flesh will be required. This is why Khaleda is the best option. By the time you have secured the magic you need, it’s possible you could lose more than an arm. We may need to take a leg. Or two. Perhaps throw in sight and hearing as well. I’m afraid I have no use for a Pale Horseman who is blind, deaf, and lame.”
I chose to ignore the threat because it wouldn’t come to that. If it got that far, I’d end things myself. I’d never give Baron Samedi the satisfaction of killing me.
“How long do I have?”
A red sheen passed over The Baron’s eyes. Or maybe that was just my infection-addled brain playing tricks on me. “You have less than twelve hours before the physical changes set in. Once that happens, there will be no reversing any cosmetic damage, even if the virus is cured.”
In other words, I’d be stuck looking like Freddy Kreuger’s ugly cousin. I’d never win any beauty contests with my current mug, but at least people didn’t run screaming in the other direction when they saw me.
“How long is that in Faerie time?”
“Hard to say,” The Baron said. “A day. A week. An hour. Faerie is somewhat sentient. If it likes you, time will be kinder. If not…”
If not, I had a lot less time than I needed. Hopefully, Faerie liked the Summer Knight.
So, I had twelve hours in Earth time to figure out who was targeting my unborn child in an assassination plot, and convince Titania to use her magic to trap the magic in part of my body and excise a pound of flesh. No big deal. As long as I didn’t think about it.
“Beth and I are going back to Faerie,” I announced. “It’s our best chance.”
The Baron stood. “I will see if I can negotiate terms with Morningstar and Khaleda on your behalf. Just in case you should change your mind.”
I wasn’t going to, but arguing with The Baron would be a waste of my time. He was going to do what he was going to do, and I couldn’t stop him.
Emma’s eyes danced between Baron Samedi and me. “What can I do?”
I hesitated. There wasn’t much for her to do. I hadn’t wanted her involved from the start. Since I’d been overridden and she insisted, I had no choice. She wouldn’t be able to help work on a cure, but there was something special I needed her to do.
“Go practice shooting. Silver bullets. Headshots. Best way to be sure with ghouls.”
Her eyes widened. “You know I can’t do that.”
I offered her a weak smile. “You’re the only one I trust to do it. If this goes wrong, I don’t want to become like Famine was. I can’t be a monster, Emma. You can’t let me hurt people.”
Her jaw trembled.
“Hey.” I put my hands on her shoulders and continued in a softer voice. “I promised not to lie to you. This is what I need you to do. I trust you to make the call and the shot if things go to hell.”
“Ass,” she said and punched me in the shoulder. “When you come back, I pick the venue, and you foot the bill.”
Dinner. She was talking about me buying her dinner. I thought that was a joke, but maybe she meant it. I smiled, nodded, and stepped back.
“Deal.”
Chapter Seventeen
We dumped the stolen truck and stumbled through the portal into Faerie around four in the morning Earth time. In Faerie, it was still the dead of night, which meant I might have time to get some sleep.
In my exhaustion, I nearly trudged right into Athdar, thinking he was just another tree branch I could push out of the way. He stuck a bark-covered arm out, blocking my path. I growled something incomprehensible at him.
“Did you find my acorns?” He held his hand out.
I dug the two acorns out of my tunic pocket and slapped them into his palm. “Be more careful with your nuts, man.”
Athdar’s eyes lit up green as he closed his palm around the acorns. He took in a deep breath and let it out slow. “Yes, these are them. You have my gratitude.”
“Whatever.” I shambled forward, barely awake. Time was running out for me, but I wouldn’t be functional without at least a little rest.
Beth caught up to me and slid her arm into mine, pulling me to the right. “Come on. I’ll take you back to your room. You’ll never find it on your own.”
I shook my head. “Don’t want to go to my room. Take me to Odette.”
She hesitated, her steps slowing to a stop.
I turned to face her when she let go of my arm. “I need to relieve the guards.”
Beth wouldn’t look at me. “Lazarus, once this is over, I don’t think I’ll be going back to New Orleans. Ever.” She hugged herself and looked away. “Too many unpleasant memories.”
“I’m an unpleasant memory now?”
It was a joke, but she looked like I’d just slapped her. “No, not everything. It’s just…I’m not cut out for this and this—us—isn’t going to work. It was a nice idea, getting back together, but we’ve just changed too much. This doesn’t mean I agree with what you said earlier. You’re not the kind of person who does well alone. You need friends, a partner. Someone to look in on you and make sure you’re not living on ramen and Red Bull again.”
I snorted at that and started forward again, this time my pace slow so we could walk together. “Why’s everyone on my case about this suddenly? I’m fine.”
Beth rolled her head to the side and looked at me, one eyebrow cocked higher than the other.
“Okay, so not really fine, but provided I make it through this mess, I don’t have any plans to go build a hut in the swamp where I can hide. I’m a city boy. My delicate ass would never survive out there.”
Beth smiled. “Well, on that we agree. Don’t ever change, Lazarus. Not for anyone.”
She brought me to Odette’s door and left to go back to her room. I relieved the guards, sending them away so I could slump against the door and sink to the floor. If anything wanted to get in, it’d have to wake me first. With arms crossed and chin tucked against my chest, I closed my eyes and fell asleep.
I dreamed I had sex with Khaleda again. It was anything but pleasant. Her fingernails sliced through flesh, peeling the skin from my bones. She pulled my hair out by the fistful. I blinked and felt my eyeballs strain against my eyelids. When I didn’t open my eyes, they liquefied and leaked out through the tear ducts. Muscle and fat putrefied, rotting off my form as if I were a corpse. Thin, near-translucent gray skin grew in to replace what I’d lost, and bat ears blossomed when she touched the sides of my head. Through the whole transformation, we didn’t stop. In the dream, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want anything except to fuck and eat and burrow into deep, dark places.
Someone kicked my foot, and I came up from the dream swinging. Kellas dodged with all the grace of a panther, an amused smirk on his lips as I stumbled forward. I didn’t even remember getting to my feet. My mind raced, putting the events of the previous night back together.
“You make a poor door guard,” Kellas purred. “Falling asleep on the job. What would Her Majesty say if she knew?”
I turned on Kellas, clenching my fists. “You know, I’ve heard there’s more than one way to skin a cat. Care to test that theory?”
He gave me a bored look. “Honestly, Lazarus, you need to learn how to take criticism. It’s unbecoming of a knight to be so…” He frowned and gestured to all of me.
“Devilishly handsome and charming?”
“Shabby.”
I squinted at him. You get bitten by a ghoul and see how you feel on less than four hours of sleep, pal.
“At any rate, it is morning, and I’ve come to invite Princess Odette to breakfast, so if you’ll excuse me…” He reached for the doorknob.
I rushed to block him. “Hold it, pal. Nobody goes in without consenting to a search.”
He made that wheezing, hacking sound cats make when they’re trying to hack up a hairball. “A search? I am the queen’s consort! I’m above reproach.”
“Not to me, you’re not. Empty your pockets and show me y
our paws or you don’t get in.”
If he’d been in his cat form, his fur would be fluffed. His eyes flickered with a yellow sheen. “Careful, Knight. I have claws.”
“And I’ve got a boomstick.” I waved my staff. “Back off, Heathcliff, or consent to the search. I’m not going to ask again.”
“Heathcliff?” He wrinkled his nose as if he were about to sneeze.
“The less cool Garfield.”
He flashed cat-like fangs. “Now see here—”
Before he could finish that thought, the door behind me opened, and Odette leaned out, closing a silk robe around her. It didn’t cover the protruding belly. “What’s going on out here?”
Kellas’ jaw snapped shut, and he practically fell into a bow. “Apologies, Princess. I only came to invite you to breakfast with your mother and I. Your ex-lover insists on searching my person.”
Odette’s eyes sparked. “Is that so?”
“I’m doing my job,” I snarled. “Everyone’s guilty until proven innocent. If he has nothing to hide, why object?”
“It’s a violation of my person.” Kellas’ voice was smooth. He knew he had me. Bastard.
Odette put on her best fake smile for Kellas. “I’d be delighted to join you and Mother. Just let me get changed and I’ll be right down.”
“Wonderful!” Kellas made a slight bow and turned only to stop as if suddenly remembering something. “Oh, and don’t forget your tea, highness. I’ll make sure they bring hot water.” He stalked off with an extra bounce in his step.
“Inside,” Odette demanded at me once he was gone and held the door. “Now.”
I stormed into the sitting room and waited to get my ass chewed out by the woman I was supposed to be protecting. If anything, she should’ve been grateful that I was being overzealous. Kellas was a creep.
She shut the door and immediately shrugged off the robe. “Kellas is my mother’s consort.”