“There was an attempt on my life last night,” I said. “Ash brought me home from Order HQ. When we got out of the car, I was jumped. Ash saved my life. Twice. We wouldn’t be standing here, having this awkward conversation if he hadn’t been there.”
Felicia blinked back tears. She looked away from me.
“I was freaked out by what happened,” I continued. “It was really bad, Felicia. I asked him to stay the night, because I didn’t feel safe.”
She met my eyes again. I could tell I’d just put a knife in her.
“You were freaked out, and you asked him to comfort you?” she said, her voice cracking. “You didn’t call me?”
Shit. Now, I had really made a mess of things.
“Felicia, he was here. He’d already saved my life.”
“I’m your best friend, Sassy! I’m the person you call when you need someone to take care of you!”
“Felicia,” I said, my voice soft, even though she was pissing me off. “There was nothing you could have done. These assassins, they murdered everyone in the surveillance team before Ash and I even got here. A wizard summoned a Hellhound to kill me. I was freaked. Okay? I wasn’t thinking hardly at all.”
“It’s true, Felicia,” Ash added. “The surveillance team had been murdered inside the van. The wizard summoned the Hellhound inside the vehicle. And then a woman attempted to tase Sassy. She’d have been incapacitated and stabbed to death if I hadn’t been there.”
Felicia was practically bawling now. The tears flowed down her cheeks as if faucets in her eyes had been turned on full-blast.
“So, you nearly died again last night,” she sobbed. “And you didn’t bother to call me or even text me. You just jumped into the arms of your new boyfriend. You let a sex-demon protect you instead of me. And you expect me to believe nothing happened? You expect me not to care that, even if nothing did happen, you neglected to call your best friend?
“Last night, while you were being ‘protected’ by Ash, I was thinking of you. I was making this.”
She held the coffee tray with one hand and dug in her coat pocket with the other. A second later she produced a delicate chain. Dangling from the end of it was a silver, dragon pendant.
“I knew today was the mission,” Felicia went on. “I knew you were scared about it. I knew the whole prospect of trying to slay a dragon was, to use your phrase, ‘freaking you out.’
“So I made you a gift. I made you a little dragon pendant for luck. So you would know that I believed in you. It was supposed to give you confidence in your moments of doubt.
“But you don’t need me for that, do you? No, now you’ve got your handsome half-incubus to protect you and take care of you and carry you through your hour of need. I was sitting home alone, trying to do something nice for you, and you were letting some sex monster console you.
“And I was coming here this morning to help you collect your courage. I brought coffee from Java Jive and the necklace. I was all set to give you all the encouragement you needed to pull off the job tonight.
“But I was just being stupid. I was naïve. I thought you cared about me and needed me. But you’ve got everything you want right here.
“So fine, Sassy. Run to Ash. Let him protect you. Piss all over me. I never meant a damned thing to you. I never helped you at all. I’m just the stupid girl who’s in love with you. And you don’t want me.”
She crossed the room to the table and set the coffees and the pendant down. She laughed bitterly.
“Good thing I brought two coffees, huh?” she said. “Who knew I was taking care of you in a whole other way. Now you and Ash can share a caffeine jolt before you run off together.”
“Felicia—” I said, but she cut me off again.
“Good luck saving the world, Sassy,” she said. She wiped tears from her eyes. “Hopefully, you can still be a hero, even though you’re not very heroic.”
She went to the door, opened it, and left without closing it behind her. I wanted to go to her. I wanted to grab her, pull her into an embrace, tell her she had it all wrong.
But I had no idea what I would say. I had no clue what words would comfort her. I did love her, just not the way she loved me. And there was no getting around the fact that I freaked out and asked Ash to watch over me last night instead of her. It didn’t matter that Ash could actually protect me and Felicia couldn’t. I hadn’t called her. I hadn’t included her. I’d broken her heart.
And I just didn’t know how to put the pieces back together.
“I should probably go,” Ash said.
I turned and looked at him. He was blushing and looking embarrassed again. It was cute. But that wasn’t attractive at the moment. It only made me hate myself more.
“Yeah,” I said, unable to think of anything better.
Ash sat down on the couch and put on his shoes. We didn’t speak. We just stood there in the awkward silence Felicia had created.
He stood, grabbed his coat, and put it on. Then he sighed.
“The event is at seven PM,” he said. “I’ll have a car collect you at three. That’ll give us plenty of time to get organized and get to the event. Good luck tonight.”
“Thanks,” I said, with no enthusiasm whatsoever in my voice.
Ash nodded. He went to the door.
“Get some rest,” he said. “It’s going to be a big night.”
“Sure,” I said, my tone still flat.
“If anything happens, text me immediately. You should be okay. Last night was the Guild’s third attempt. It’ll take Mk’Rai some time to organize another solution, and he’ll have his hands full getting ready for tonight’s event.”
“Okay.”
He stared at me for another second. I wished he would quit that. I hated myself enough without him making me feel worse.
“Bye, Sassy.”
“Bye.”
He left, shutting the door behind him. I sighed, crossed the room, and locked up. I absolutely did not want any more trouble. In fact, for about the thousandth time, I just wanted this to be over.
I needed to talk to Felicia. She was my sounding board, the person I relied on. But she didn’t want to hear from me anymore. Thank God, I didn’t work today. I could not imagine how awkward that would have been.
Feeling lost, I wandered over to the table. Felicia’s necklace lay there, gleaming up at me. I ran a finger over the pendant. I could almost feel the love in it. Damn, but I hated myself.
Overcome with exhaustion, I stumbled back into my bedroom. I collapsed on the bed and lay there, soaking in the misery.
Sometime later, I passed out. I dreamed of Felicia. She hated me.
I woke up at eleven, feeling worse than when I’d fallen asleep. I took a shower, but it didn’t make me feel any better.
Ash had left me too much time to think. Not that it had exactly been his fault. Felicia definitely chased him away.
But I didn’t have work or teaching, and I couldn’t call Felicia for a coffee. I just had empty time I couldn’t fill before I was supposed to go assassinate the founder of Lexie’s.
And seriously. Was I really going to do this? Was I actually going to a fancy charity ball with a recently discovered brother who hated me, so I could murder a notorious businessman considering a run for Congress? Because people I hadn’t known last week told me he was a dragon?
I’m good at a lot of things and doubting myself is one of them. Three hours before The Order was supposed to pick me up, I was riding that self-doubt train right into the side of a mountain. I became convinced I was going to die.
I needed someone to keep me from going insane. The only person I trusted besides Felicia was Ben, and he was at work. Plus, he wouldn’t be a very sympathetic ear. He’d probably have me committed if I him told what I was planning to do.
What I really wanted was my mama. I needed comfort from her. And I needed answers.
It was time she and I had a talk.
An hour later, I was standing by Mama
’s grave. I’d called a Lyft and had the driver wait for me. I didn’t expect to be long, and I didn’t want to have to figure out how to get back home.
It was a bright, sunny, autumn afternoon in Southern Ohio. The air was crisp. The leaves were aflame with fall colors. The breeze was soft and pleasant.
That pissed me off. I was here to visit my dead mama. It was supposed to be cold and grey and maybe raining. Damn weatherman couldn’t get anything right.
I stared at the simple, small gravestone and tried to think of something to say. I mean, it’s not like she could talk back. What the hell was I even doing here?
“Hi, Mama,” I said. It seemed like a decent opening. “How are you?”
And then I went and fucked it all up. How are you? Gee, honey, I don’t know. I guess I’m dead.
I sighed heavily.
“Did you know I have a brother?” I asked. “I mean aside from Ben? His name is Ephraim. He’s a dick.
“Apparently, my dad – You remember Eli, right? – had been searching for me my whole life. I don’t know what he told you that scared you, but he didn’t give up. You were right that he’d never let me go.
“They finally found me last week, Mama. I should have told you on your birthday, but Ben was here, and you know how he is. He wouldn’t have understood.
“Anyway, Ephraim hates me. Apparently, since his dad spent his whole life looking for me, he felt second-best, like he didn’t matter.”
I paused. There were things I wanted to say, but I wasn’t sure I should. I looked around to see if anyone was watching. For the moment, I appeared to have the cemetery to myself.
“You kind of fucked us both up, Mama,” I said. “I know, I know. Watch my language.
“But seriously, you made me wonder who my dad was, made me feel like there was a hole in me I couldn’t fill. And you made Ephraim hate me long before he ever met me.
“I mean, Dad helped too. He was obsessed. He wouldn’t let me go like you wanted him to. So you had to hide me away, and Ephraim got to live with that.
“And I just don’t know why you did it, Mama. I don’t understand why you were so scared of me being this N’Chai Toroth. Why you didn’t want me to know I was Nephilim. I’m so good at martial arts now, Mama. You’d be really proud. And being Nephilim helped with that. I’ve got magical powers that made me a major badass.
“Of course, The Order wants me to slay a dragon for them. They claim only I can do it. And they’re not telling me everything. Is that why you didn’t want them to have me? Did you know they weren’t actually good people?
“I’ve just got so many questions, Mama. And you’re not here to answer them. I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing. And I’m sure you’d tell me I’m not, but if I could read your reactions, if I could hear your voice, I might know what to do. I might know if you were paranoid or smart. I don’t want to have to make this decision on my own, and I’m running out of time. They’re picking me up in two hours, and my life will change forever after that.
“So why, Mama? Why did you hide me away? What did you know that you didn’t tell me? What did Dad say to you that scared you so bad?”
I stood there quietly, fighting back tears, listening for any sound that might sound like an answer. I didn’t get one. Naturally.
“Yeah, I figured,” I said. “I pretty much knew you wouldn’t say anything. But I had to try, right?
“Listen, Mama, I’m gonna have to do what they say. If I don’t, my life will be in danger. This dragon will find me and kill me. The only way to get out of this is for me to get him first.
“Hopefully, I won’t screw it up and die. Hopefully, you’ll forgive me, since this is probably exactly what you were trying to protect me from.
“I love you, Mama. But you should have told me about this before you died. You should have been honest with me.”
My voice trailed away. My tears dried in my eyes, unspilled. There didn’t seem to be anything else to say.
I turned away from the grave and trudged back to the Lyft.
“Okay take me home,” I said as I slid into the backseat.
“No problem,” said the driver. I’d already forgotten her name.
As she put the car in motion, I dug in my pocket and got out my phone. I called up Ben’s number and sent him a quick text:
I love you, Obi-Wan.
He replied thirty seconds later.
Are you ok?
No, Ben. I’m not even close to okay. But I can’t tell you that.
Yep, just wanted to make you smile.
His response was predictable: If you want to make me smile, stop calling me Obi-Wan.
Oh, Ben. Thanks for that bit of normalcy.
Smirking, I put my phone away. It was time to get my game-face on.
I had a dragon to slay.
Twenty-seven
W hen we showed up at Dirk McCray’s mansion, I was a mess of worry. This was the biggest house I had ever seen. It was like Wayne Manor. I mean, Indian Hills is home to the rich and infamous in Cincy, but this mansion was on a whole other level. It looked as though you could fit my entire apartment complex in it twice, maybe three times.
Ephraim was dressed like James Bond – an immaculate, ridiculously expensive tuxedo that was clearly tailored to his body. His hair may have been short, but he had it expertly styled. Not a lock was out of place. His green eyes blazed with intensity as we approached our destination.
As for me, the dress was incredibly uncomfortable. It was not the sort of thing I ever wore, and it didn’t fit right. When they asked me for my size, they didn’t account for my bubble butt. The dress fit right in the bust and waist, but the skirt was riding up in the back and squeezing my thighs together. For something that probably cost more than I made in a year, you would have thought they’d have measured better.
The fact that I was wearing a dress that expensive that didn’t fit right on the way to a murder made me nervous enough. But Ephraim was his usual asshole self. He didn’t goad me on not being good enough or that this should have been his job. But he still treated me like shit. So much for him paying up after losing our bet.
With Ephraim’s trademark condescension working on me, the size of the mansion, and the ill-fit of my dress, all my fears about the mission bubbled to the surface. I didn’t move in rich crowds. I was a poor, Black girl from the inner city. And I was a smart-mouthed pain in the ass. What if I said the wrong thing? What if I did something stupid? What if I blew our cover by the very fact that I was a fish out of water? There were at least a hundred ways for me to fuck this up, and I was suddenly terrified I would manage to execute every one of them.
I fingered Felicia’s pendant. Ephraim had insisted I not wear it, that it would be a dead giveaway. They had picked out some nice pearls that cost the same as a Mercedes for me to wear instead. I’d refused. Felicia may have been pissed at me, may have not wanted to see me or hear from me at all. But I needed her with me. The only way I would have the courage to do this was to have her by my side, however metaphorically.
Of course, I wore the pearls too – partly to appease Ephraim. He was such an asshole, I had to do something to take the edge off him.
But I mainly wore them because the necklace was my communication device. The Order had enchanted them to act as a microphone that could pick up my voice and transmit it across the ether to Ash in the van, which was parked two miles away. The matching earrings carried his voice – and Ephraim’s too when we were separated – to me. I had to give these guys credit. They had all that nifty super-spy tech, but they did it with magic, so you didn’t have to wear a wire and it was totally undetectable.
Our limo pulled up to the grounds, and a guy in a fancy tux with tails ran up to the car and opened the door. I turned and put my feet on the ground, and he offered me his hand to help me out. I was about to slap it away, when I remembered this sort of chauvinistic bullshit was expected of the upper crust. Sighing softly, I took his hand and allowed him to assist
me out.
That turned out to be a good idea, because they had me wearing these ridiculous stiletto heels. I’d tried to explain that they were impractical for fighting, but I’d been told all the women would be wearing FMP’s, and that I could take them off when it was necessary. Stupid. Especially since I never wore heels, and I was struggling to walk in these things. Jesus, my ankles hurt already.
Ephraim didn’t offer me his elbow as we made our way to the house. I was secretly glad of that. I didn’t want to touch him, but I would have probably done it to help me walk. I was terrified I was going to misstep and fall on my face.
At the door, we had to wait in a short line behind several couples dressed exactly as we were – men in hot tuxes, women in dresses you fantasized pulling off. If it weren’t for the scent of arrogance and too much money, I’d probably have been panting with desire. Every man and woman was beautiful, and I was attracted to them all.
We finally got to the front, and two brutes with headsets and ill-fitting tuxedos checked our invitations. The one who inspected mine had a gun poking out of his jacket, and he leered at me, attempting to see down my dress. I wanted to smack him.
“See anything you like?” I asked, unable to resist baiting him.
He smirked wordlessly at me and waved me through. Jesus, this place was terrible. Even the hired help was insufferable.
“Watch your mouth, Kincaide,” Ephraim growled. “If you make trouble, you’ll get us thrown out.”
I wanted to tell him to fuck off, but it wasn’t like he was going to listen. He was male and an asshole.
When we got inside, my heart pounded. As lavish as the exterior of the house was, the inside was next-level. The hardwood floor was polished to a shine. The walls were honey oak and hung with paintings that obviously cost fortunes. I didn’t recognize any of them – aside from famous paintings like “Mona Lisa,” “The Scream,” and “Starry Night,” I knew shit about art. But rich people don’t hang cheap things in their houses.
The foyer was huge, and it opened up into a central receiving room that had passageways running off in three different directions. A winding staircase with red carpeting went up to my left and terminated on a balcony that ran the length of the lower room. The banisters of both the stairway and the landing were polished oak like the rest of the house.
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