♀♂
Kylie could hardly see the road through the blur of tears clouding her vision. She’d been lucky to contain them until she got inside of the truck and away from Travis’ discerning gaze.
No matter how tempted she was to pull off to the side of the road and vent her frustration to the universe, she thought better of it. She just needed to get out of this town and she’d be fine. Back to life as she knew it. It wasn’t like she hadn’t made it through the last ten years without the man she just walked away from.
So why did it feel like this was the final goodbye when that happened a lifetime ago?
Hadn’t she been through enough already?
Watching Gage as he walked out of her life – even if it had been her choice – was hard enough to deal with. It was almost as though she were being tested. As though watching Travis walk out of her life all those years ago wasn’t the most difficult thing she would ever have to do. And now this. Handing Travis divorce papers was harder than even those two instances combined.
Honestly, she expected to be driving away with the papers signed which would’ve at least given her some closure. He hadn’t signed them though. He didn’t even look at them. Instead, Travis had looked at her like he was lost, and for a few ridiculous moments Kylie wanted to find him again. But, that wasn’t possible. Their lives had gone in two entirely different directions and based on what she knew of Travis Walker today, he was not the man she had fallen in love with back then.
Not to mention, she wasn’t the same woman.
Far from it.
Ever since Gage Matthews walked into her life, tripping her up, Kylie made sure to lose the naïve, over the moon dreams she’d carried with her since she was younger. More specifically, since Travis broke her heart.
There was no happily ever after for her. Not with Travis. Not with Gage. Of course, she was either stupid or naïve – possibly both – to believe that she could get what she needed from either of them, but it didn’t stop her heart from jumping up and down, flailing around as though she needed to be seen.
To top off her overflowing plate of foolishness, Kylie had given in to her curiosity and hunted the internet for information on Travis. What she unearthed had undoubtedly helped to keep her from falling apart. It was the reason she was spurred into motion, rushing out to find a lawyer so she could get the divorce proceedings underway.
Finding out that the man you married all those years ago was working toward owning and operating one of the biggest fetish related resorts in the state was certainly a wakeup call. Right there in Coyote Ridge. Where everything had come full circle for her.
Not only was she stunned by what she read regarding the nature of the resort his company was building, but Kylie had also realized right then that Travis had done well for himself over the years. Knowing the day was going to come when he delivered divorce papers to her, just to protect himself and his newfound wealth, she decided to beat him to the punch.
It wouldn’t hurt nearly as much if she were the one taking steps to sever all ties to him. At least that’s what she told herself. A mantra she kept on repeat in her head until she couldn’t stand to be around herself any more. But now, today, the ache had returned. The look on Travis’ face wrecked her, even if she knew he’d merely been reflecting his surprise.
By the time the tears finally stopped rolling down her face, Kylie was on her way out of the small town of Coyote Ridge and heading back toward the toll road that would lead her home. It wouldn’t take her long from that point. Glancing down at the gas gauge, she realized she needed to stop, or she was going to be wishing on a star to get her home. Based on her recent luck, she knew exactly how that would play out – and she was too tired to hoof it anywhere.
A few minutes later, Kylie pulled into the Gas ‘n Go where she and Gage had stopped during her first trip there. Taking a deep breath, she willed her hands to stop shaking as she wiped the wet streaks from her cheeks. There was no reason to be crying now. It was said and done, and the only thing she had to wait for was Travis’ call. It seemed like she’d been waiting a lifetime for that.
Climbing out of the truck, she moved around to the pump. With hurried movements, she slid her credit card through the reader and managed to hit all of the appropriate buttons before turning to shove the nozzle into the gas tank. Going through the motions, she filled her tank, took her receipt and climbed back in.
With her hand on the key sticking out of the ignition, Kylie glanced out the window. Her breath caught. At first she thought she was hallucinating, but there was no way she’d be able to conjure up a man that devastatingly handsome in her mind.
Travis.
He was walking into the store, his gaze locked with hers as though he could sense she was looking at him. Which she was. He wasn’t coming to talk to her, which was good. Really good. There was no way she could face him right now. Flipping the key over, Kylie listened to the engine roar to life, and a few deep breaths later, with the radio blaring her favorite song by Miranda Lambert, Kylie did her best to clear her mind of Travis Walker.
And Gage Matthews.
Damn it was going to be a long drive.
▪▫▪▫▪▫
A little less than an hour later, Kylie was pulling into her driveway, glancing up at her modest little house – her pride and joy – and for the first time, she realized how empty and lonely her house actually felt. Since the very first day she walked through it with her Realtor, she’d fallen in love and then spent months restoring it with her own two hands, pouring all of her heart and soul into it. But for some reason as she parked in the shallow driveway, she felt like something was missing.
Shaking off the feeling, Kylie made her way inside, dropping her purse on the table just inside the kitchen. Maybe she should get a cat. At least then she’d have someone to greet her when she came home. Never had she even considered that she was just lonely. Not until recently. Not until Gage walked out of her house. And not until today.
As it turned out, severing the final ties with Travis was harder than she thought. Another explanation as to why she’d put it off for so long.
Inhaling the fresh scent of lemon oil and wood, Kylie was ready to get on with her day. Before she made it two steps, a loud knock on the front door nearly sent her into hysterics. Turning abruptly, her hand covering her heart to keep the jolted organ from jumping clean out of her chest, she stared through the glass pane in the front door.
And then her heartbeat ceased.
“Kylie, open the door.”
It was as though her body wasn’t hers and she couldn’t understand what she was supposed to do, other than stare at the huge cowboy that stood just a few feet away on her front porch.
“Come on, open the door,” he told her and she managed to move one step closer.
When she could reach the handle, Kylie took a deep breath and removed the only protective barrier between her and the man she didn’t think she’d ever see again. At least not this soon anyway.
“Can we go somewhere and talk?” Travis asked without preamble.
Kylie couldn’t even find the words to respond. Seeing him on her front porch, his cowboy hat tipped down over his eyes, throwing his handsome face in shadow, mixed with his impressive size had her on the verge of drooling if she even attempted to open her mouth.
What was wrong with her?
Shaking her head back and forth to clear the fog that had filled all of the space between her ears, she balled her hands into fists, willing the shaking to stop.
“Then maybe we can talk out here?”
He must’ve assumed she was telling him no, but Kylie was more comfortable with the latter anyway. At least they’d be on her turf.
“Ok,” she squeaked, irritated with the sound of her voice. Clearing her throat, she nodded and opened the screen door as he took a step back.
“You still drive like a bat out of hell, you know that?” he said as he leaned against the post, crossing one ankle over the othe
r, his arms across his chest.
The pose was meant to be casual. Instead, it was just disturbingly sexy.
The man was intimidating. Being this close to him, Kylie felt every ounce of his presence right down to the core of her. Travis stood at six-foot-five-inches, which was almost a foot taller than her, and intimidating in its own right, but it was the breadth of his chest and the power she could see in his muscled thighs that gave her pause. Confident, arrogant, whole-heartedly sure of himself… Travis Walker was dangerous. To her sanity.
Crap. Her body was still reacting to him as though she were nineteen and stupid.
“Did you follow me?” she asked, hoping she sounded more unaffected by his presence at her house than she really was.
“Tried.” Travis shrugged.
Fidgeting, Kylie wondered whether she should sit down. She moved closer to the porch swing, but then opted to forgo sitting there. She didn’t need that much Travis looming over her. Instead, she moved over to the railing and lifted herself to sit on the edge, glancing over at him briefly. Rounding her back, her legs crossed at the ankle and her hands gripping the rail, Kylie was going for nonchalant.
She probably looked more like petrified.
“Did you sign the papers?”
“No.”
His immediate response caught her off guard. She figured the only reason he would drive the distance he had would be to give her the papers and be done with her.
“Any reason why not?”
“Haven’t looked at them yet,” he explained as though that made perfect sense.
“You should,” she muttered.
“Why?”
Kylie stared into stormy blue-gray eyes and a flood of memories assaulted her. Like it was yesterday and not ten years ago that she’d last seen him standing in the living room of her apartment. The same apartment she was supposed to be living in with him since they’d been married just three short weeks before. Rather than staying, Travis had turned her world upside down and walked away.
Over the years, she had tried to convince herself that he wasn’t impacted by what he did, but she’d seen it in the expression on his face that fateful day. He didn’t want to go, which only pissed her off even more. It didn’t stop him in the end.
“Why are you here?” she asked, ignoring his last question. She wasn’t going to get into her reasons for filing for divorce. The only thing he needed to know was that she was ten years later than she should’ve been in getting it taken care of.
“To talk.”
The man didn’t know how to speak in sentences. Since the day she met him, he’d rarely gone into detail when he spoke. He was a man of few words, but he always managed to cut to the chase. He also had an uncanny ability to keep his emotions locked down. At least she’d been right about one thing… he hadn’t changed over the years.
At least not in ways she’d hoped he would.
Chapter Ten
♂♀
As his common sense returned in slow measures, Travis was beginning to question what the fuck he was doing. As soon as Kylie’s truck disappeared from sight, the only thing he could think about was not letting her walk away so easily. The small voice in his head kept telling him not to fuck this up again. There’d be no turning back if he let her go this time.
She wanted a divorce.
Of course she wanted a divorce.
He was a fucking idiot and walked out on her ten years ago because he never thought she’d accept him for who he truly was. Not that he thought she was any different now. Nor had he ever even given her a chance to decide for herself. And the truth was he sure as hell hadn’t changed. So why he was standing in front of her, half tempted to convince her otherwise was beyond him.
She looked just as innocent as ever, although he witnessed that strange detachment in her eyes earlier. He didn’t want to think he’d been the one to put that look on her face. It was rather presumptuous for him to believe he’d had any impact on her life at all. After the short time they were together, it was true that Kylie had forever changed him, but he was a stupid fuck for thinking the same might’ve been true for her.
Looking at her now, Travis noticed that her eyes were red as though she’d been crying. He could still see the faint tear streaks on her soft cheeks. He wanted to lean over and run the backs of his fingers down her smooth face, get rid of the evidence from any pain he might’ve caused her. Only touching her, even for that brief moment when he tried to stop her from leaving the parking lot at Walker Demo had stirred up emotions inside of him that Travis didn’t even know existed.
Anymore.
Not since the day he walked out on Kylie had he ever felt even a slight attachment to anyone else. Not one single time.
Well, maybe that wasn’t entirely true, but he was leaving Gage out of this because he didn’t understand his strange obsession with the man any more than he understood why he was standing here.
For the entire drive to her house, Travis tried to convince himself why he was following her. Closure? He needed it, and after seeing the sadness in her eyes when she walked away from him, he knew she deserved it. The least he could do was see how she was doing and try to ensure she knew that his walking away had never been about her.
Not that he particularly cared to explain himself. He’d never been adept at expressing his feelings in a way that benefited anyone, especially him.
“You could’ve just given me the papers,” Kylie said before he could say anything more. “I would’ve been on my way, and you wouldn’t have had to drive all the way out here.”
“Like I told you, I haven’t signed them,” he explained, noticing the way her eyebrows darted up as though she hadn’t expected him to say as much. “Mind if we just talk?”
Kylie shrugged her shoulders as though she didn’t care, turning her attention to the yard beyond her front porch. Travis couldn’t take his eyes off of her. He noticed the way she fidgeted, rocking back and forth on the edge of the rail, her hands squeezed around the wood beam until her knuckles were white, refusing to look up at him.
She was cute as hell.
He allowed the silence to hang between them for a moment while he studied her. He couldn’t help but notice that Kylie’s once gentle demeanor had been replaced with something harder, colder even. Or maybe it was just him that brought out that side of her. He didn’t know.
“What did you want to talk about?” Kylie asked, looking around at anything except him.
“Look at me, Kylie,” he stated more sternly than he anticipated.
Kylie’s eyes shot toward his face, and he met them head on. He was demanding, he knew that about himself, but it was another part of himself he’d kept hidden from her all those years ago. The difference between then and now, Travis didn’t pretend to be something he wasn’t. Not after her. Knowing that Kylie had fallen for a man that didn’t exist, Travis vowed never to do that to anyone else again. He made it abundantly clear who he was by the way he acted, sometimes overdoing it just to ensure no one got the wrong impression of him.
“How are you?”
Kylie’s eyebrows shot the opposite direction, a frown replacing the surprise he’d just witnessed. Sure, Travis knew this was unusual behavior, especially for him, but he wanted to know how she was. Seeing her with Gage at Kaleb’s had raised a heap of questions, the first being how they knew each other. Since he couldn’t just out and out grill her over her relationship with the man, he wanted to start out simple.
“Fine.”
“Fine?” For some reason he didn’t believe her.
“What do you want me to say, Travis? I’ve managed to mind my own business all these years, letting you walk away because you chose to do so only to have your friend show up on my doorstep and flip my world upside down. I’m fine. I figure that’s a polite way of putting it.”
Travis didn’t speak right away. He processed what she said for a minute, keeping his arms firmly crossed over his chest, his eyes locked on her.
He had suspected that Gage went digging around in his past, and it wasn’t shocking that he’d figured out Travis was still married. His confusion came from Gage’s audacity, his ability to deceive Kylie just to get back at him. Travis could think of a million things to say about Gage, but devious had never been one of them.
“He’s not my friend.” Seriously, that was all he came up with?
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. Gage isn’t my friend. He’s a friend of my brother.”
“Yeah, Gage told me you had a brother,” Kylie stated.
Hearing that statement from her nearly leveled him. Here was a woman he had married ten years ago, hoping she would fill a void that he knew couldn’t be filled, all the while he kept his personal life a complete secret from her.
“I have six brothers.”
Her face fell, and Travis saw the recognition as it dawned. She didn’t know him.
“Six?”
“Yes.”
“How did I not know that?” she asked, sounding defeated as she looked down at the ground.
“There’s a lot about me you didn’t know, Kylie.”
“Evidently, but...”
When she didn’t finish the sentence, Travis contemplated how much he should tell her now. If he thought about it, there was no reason he should fill her in on the details now that she was asking for a divorce. How much would she even care to know anyway?
“It doesn’t matter,” Kylie blurted, jumping down from the rail and moving toward the door.
Before Travis could think it through, he grabbed Kylie’s arm much like he had earlier. What was it about this woman that he didn’t want her running away from him?
This was new for him. These emotions she had reawakened. He wasn’t ready to move on with his routine, day-to-day life just yet and for some reason, now that his past had caught up with him, he felt as though she deserved some explanations.
“I want to talk. Can you just give me this?” he asked, then realized he didn’t have the right to ask her for anything.
“This? What’s this, Travis?” Kylie’s pretty blue eyes darkened with anger, and he knew he officially crossed the line. “You walked out on me, remember? And after that, you left it up to me to get the divorce. I had to relive the pain all over again just so I could muster up the courage to get a lawyer.”
Travis (Alluring Indulgence, #3) Page 9