by Opal Mellon
“Nick?”
“Yup,” he said. “Looked like you had a tough day at work. I brought you brownies.”
“Thank you.” The plate was heavy and brown. He’d brought more brown into her life, just what she needed.
“Can I come inside for a moment?”
Justin shouldn’t be there for at least a couple of minutes. Plus, he wouldn’t mind another guy around. He was used to hanging out with other men, right? She gestured past the door for Nick, who moved quickly around her. He surveyed the apartment.
“Is the kitchen back there?”
“Yes,” she said. “Here, I’ll take them.” She didn’t like him walking through her house, knowing where everything was. She barely knew him.
“No, I’ll set them on the counter,” he said. “You go ahead and sit down.”
It’s my house, she thought. But she sat. He came back from the kitchen and sat on the same couch. She scooted over.
“You left early today,” he said. “That’s not like you. Is something wrong?”
“Only ten minutes early,” she said. “I have plans tonight.”
“Oh?” he said. “Should I go?”
“You don’t have to yet.” She sat back and propped her feet on the ottoman, then put her hands behind her head and sighed. She started to pull her hair out but stopped when she felt Nick watching. For some reason, pulling her hair out in front of him would seem oddly intimate, something she didn’t want with her gangly, quiet but pushy coworker.
Someone knocked on the door.
Molly stood up to get it, but before she could, Nick stopped her.
“Listen Molly,” he said. “Before anyone else comes, I’ll tell you why I really came.”
She raised an eyebrow, looked at the door impatiently, and then gave him a look that said he had about five seconds to explain himself.
“I like you Molly,” he said. “I want you to share your problems with me. I’d like to see you outside work sometime.”
Was this a joke? Why would he want time out of work with her?
A second set of knocks sounded, louder this time.
“Why Nick? I don’t understand. What do we have in common other than work?”
It sounded like someone at the front door tested the doorknob to see if it was locked. Was it the stalker? She felt her face tighten just barely, but Nick seemed to notice.
He snuck an arm around her shoulders. “That’s what I’m talking about Molly. Sometimes you seem so lost, so vulnerable. I could protect you.”
“What?” She forgot about the door as confusion and rage rolled through her. “Excuse me? I don’t need you to protect me.” She didn’t need anyone. Oh no, she was becoming that Molly again. Oh well, she’d rather be that Molly than some desperate, clinging Molly that accepted help from this presuming idiot.
“Ah.” Nick sat back. “I like that. Independent. Then how about I just do this for you? I’m sure no one else does.” He wrapped his arms around her.
Completely unthreatened, Molly waited to see if she felt anything. She never felt anything when men tried to do stuff like this. Just complete disinterest. Was she broken? She just felt bony arms grabbing at her.
“Nick,” she said, preparing to pull him off. She wished he hadn’t done this and made things awkward.
The door swung open. Someone shouted her name and they both turned to see who it was.
“So this is the stalker?” Justin stomped across the carpet. “Good thing the door was unlocked and I came when I did.”
She lifted a head to explain, but Nick jumped back from her and let go.
“What stalker? Molly, are you being stalked?” Nick seemed genuinely confused.
Justin hauled Nick up by his plaid collar. Molly couldn’t help noticing the play of the strong muscles in Justin’s forearms beneath his tan, smooth skin. She didn’t need a man to protect her, but she felt that if she did let one, she’d prefer Justin to do it.
“Get off me.” Nick kicked Justin in the shin.
Justin swore under his breath and dropped him.
“What are you doing here anyway? Where do you get off coming in without an invite?” Nick adjusted his shirt.
“I was invited. Were you?” Justin looked at Molly instead of Nick as he asked it.
She shook her head at both of them. “Stop it. Nick, I said I had plans. Thanks for coming by, but please don’t again. I’d prefer to keep our relationship a strictly professional one.” She walked over to extend a hand to help him up but he didn’t take it. He pouted on the ground for a moment before getting on all fours to push to his feet. He walked to the kitchen and took his brownies, scowled at both of them and headed out the door.
Justin and Molly raised an eyebrow to each other. Justin looked like he wanted to laugh.
“And it’s good to know you’re just as shallow as every other woman, Molly! I thought you were different! It’s true that nice guys finish last I gue—”
But Justin shut the door in his face before any more of his tirade could reach them.
“Wow,” Molly said, sitting down again.
“Still feel like ice cream?” Justin sat on the other couch and propped an arm on the armrest. He looked so relaxed, so at rest, even after a scene that had utterly riled her. Why did it seem he was her opposite in every way possible? What a sucky day.
“It’s okay if you don’t,” he said. “That was super disturbing.” He brought up one of his legs to balance his ankle on his other knee and folded his arms behind his head. “Wow, you have the worst luck. Stalker and a crazy coworker all in one day.”
“Wait.” She sat forward. “Do you think it could be him?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “He was certainly being the super creep. Did you see him take his brownies back? Too bad; we might have found date rape drugs in them.” He laughed.
Molly frowned. Watching Justin laugh was the last straw. This day was the pits. She didn’t realize she was crying until she saw Justin’s stricken face and the way he dropped his hands and uncrossed his legs.
It couldn’t really be called crying. She was just leaking. Her tear ducts were malfunctioning and thus water was slowly trickling down her face. The last time this happened was in college when …
“Molly? I’m sorry.” Justin’s handsome face looked crumpled and troubled. Before he’d looked the confident hero, but now he looked like he’d rather be anywhere but here. Molly would have thought Justin would have more experience with crying women. Then again, maybe that’s why he looked so afraid.
“I don’t see why it’s so funny if someone wants to date rape me,” she said. “Why? Because I’m ugly? Because I don’t have any friends? Is that why I deserve a stalker, and a perverted coworker?”
“No Molly. Shh.” He pressed a finger lightly to her lip and then sat beside her. He reached out an arm for her to curl under, and she was shocked when she did. It was just nice not to be alone. To be warm. She smiled.
“I’m sorry kid,” he said. “I make jokes when I’m nervous. I wish I had proof that he’d done something to those brownies because then I’d have an excuse to beat the creep up.”
“I can’t picture you beating someone up,” she said. “Oh wait, yes I can.”
“I know, I don’t seem the type.” He ruffled her ponytail. “But trust me, if I’d tried those brownies and they’d been drugged I’d have been on him like white on rice.”
“Thank you,” she said.
“Anything for a friend. Besides you said you’d let me make it up to you.”
“I did,” she said.
“So yeah, I’d check out date rape brownies for you any day.” He appeared to consider it for a moment then narrowed his eyes and pursed full lips. “That is if you could promise not to take advantage of me.”
“I think I could promise that,” she said. “I wouldn’t know what to do anyway.”
“Really?” He took her hands to pull her up. “That sounds like an interesting conversation to have ove
r ice cream.”
“I don’t know.” She smiled. “But yes to the ice cream.”
“Yes to the ice cream.” He grinned. “I’ll take it.”
Chapter 5
“You’re getting a small?” Molly frowned.
“Is that a problem?” Justin asked.
“It’s just that if you are getting a small, I have to get a small, right?”
Justin snorted, and then gave her a look that said he was waiting for an explanation. He let one person go in front of them in line.
“Just something I heard.” Molly looked away.
“Molly have you never been on a date?”
“I’ve been on dates!” she said. “Like two.” She looked for dust on the floor so she didn’t have to see Justin’s face.
“Molly, you are getting a large.” He moved up in line. “Have you decided what flavor?”
“I’ll decide what size, thanks.”
Justin threw up his hands and laughed. “All right, Miss Independent. As it should be.”
After they picked up their ice cream, they turned to look for seating. Molly looked at hers in disgust. Somehow mixing rice milk with pistachio flavor had resulted in something like Shrek’s skin in a blender.
“That looks bad,” Justin said. He took a seat in a booth at the corner and she sat on the other side. “Want to try mine?”
“No,” she said. She took a bite and winced. “It’s so good. You wish you had it.”
“It looks like someone sneezed. Someone very sick.”
She glared at him.
“Okay.” He ate his chocolate concoction. “Good you got a large then.”
She watched his mouth work, watched his face and mouth muscles. Around the café, other women were watching them.
Was this a date?
“Is this a date?”
Justin choked. He pushed soft hair back from his face in a way that reminded Molly how feminine he could be at times. “No, Molly, it’s not a date.”
She stared at him, not letting emotion show, either disappointment or relief.
“I just invited you out to get ice cream alone, paid, and drove.”
She perked up. “So it is a date?”
“Yes, silly.”
“I’m not the one who’s a male escort.”
“Shh, you’ll expose my secret identity.”
And he did look worried that someone would hear, so Molly apologized.
“So is that what you want to do with your life?”
Justin set down his spoon and looked to the window, giving her another opportunity to study the lines of his face, his straight jaw, the deep teal of his eyes beneath long lashes …
“You keep checking me out like that and I’m going to think you want me to do something about it.”
She blanched. “What? Isn’t it normal to look at your date after you’ve asked a question?”
“Molly, there are different ways of looking at people. When you think I’m not watching, you look at me like you want to eat me.”
“I’ve been told I’m intense,” she said. “You’re nice to look at.”
She said it without stammering, without apology, and he looked surprised, and a little disappointed.
“Ah, so that’s what it is? My pertiness?” He shoved a too big spoon of ice cream in and it filled his cheeks. He looked like a pouting child. She laughed.
“I guess so,” she said.
She knew he hadn’t forgotten her question so she waited for his answer.
“I guess I don’t know what I’ll do with my life,” he said.
“You’re pretty old for that.”
“And you enjoy engineering?”
“It’s a job,” she said. “It’s a career.”
“And escorting isn’t?”
She shrugged. “That’s what I’m asking. No need to be defensive Justin.”
He tapped his fingers on the table. “I’m taking day classes here and there,” he said. “I’d still like to go into engineering.”
“Then why not just commit?”
“It’s not that simple,” he said.
“Why not?”
“There are factors,” he said. “Things I can’t control.” He swirled his spoon in the last melted remnants in his cup. “I don’t want to commit to something and get uprooted again.”
Molly felt that if she was a more socially astute person there was a double meaning somewhere in there. “Uprooted like in college?”
He nodded, paling a little.
“Do you want to go?” she asked.
He nodded. “But I’m not ready to go home yet.”
“Where do you want to go then?”
“The beach.”
“But it’s dark.”
“Best time to go.” He winked at her and she felt nervous about it. But it was Justin, so it would be fine, right?
When they arrived at the beach, the sky was nearly black. Stars shone faintly around a bright moon, lighting the sky navy and midnight around it. The water reflected the blacks, the navy, and the midnight of the sky, along with occasional flashes of light along the waves. The sand sparkled and reminded her of the dark granite at Club Blue.
“Pretty huh?” Justin said, coming up behind her. “Come on, let’s go sit closer to the waves.”
“It’s cold.”
“You want my coat?”
“Yes,” Molly said. She took it and noted its gigantic size, and the warmth it transferred from him to her. He’d be cold, but maybe that was good because it would extinguish any weird ideas he might be getting about being alone on the beach with her.
He plopped in the sand with his long legs in front and leaned back on his hands. He looked carefree, his hair blown back by the wind, T-shirt lightly waving. She could see his pecs outlined by his shirt.
It was just like being with one of the beautiful boys from her comics, and she remembered that that was how it had been five years ago. She’d always loved watching his large expressive eyes, straight nose, full lips.
“So I want to hear what you meant earlier.”
“What do you mean?” She stuffed her hands down in the cold sand.
“You said you wouldn’t even know what to do to take advantage of me.”
She made a small gagging noise and knew her face was probably turning bright red. She hoped he couldn’t see it in the darkness.
“You’re blushing. Uh oh.” He leaned in closer and pulled her hair back, and she tried to push him away but simply tumbled back on the sand away from him. Good enough.
“I’m not blushing.”
“Oh. My bad,” he said. “Why wouldn’t you know what to do?”
“I think you can guess,” she said, pushing herself back up, making sure she was at a good distance from him. She brushed sand off her arms. “You’re just trying to embarrass me.”
“Me? Never!”
“Shut up.”
“Molly, are you a vir—”
“Shut up!”
“That’s adorable,” he said.
“I’ve kissed people,” she said.
“Kudos to you.” He turned to his side and propped up his head on one arm.
She looked at his biceps, sure that if she just looked for a couple seconds, he wouldn’t notice. The biceps flexed, and she looked up to see him smiling at her.
“Stop that!” She blushed again.
“Stop looking at me like a slab of meat.”
“I don’t hang out with meat often,” she said.
He frowned. “So you just see me as meat too?”
“I don’t know how to see you,” she said, drawing her initials in the sand. “We were friends.”
“Were we?” he said. “Or was I a piece of meat then too?”
She glared at him, unsure if he was serious or teasing. She didn’t think he knew either.
“Anyway, I’m not into that kind of thing.”
“What do you mean?” He sat up a little, propping his cheek on his hand.
�
��Kissing. The other stuff,” she said. “I don’t feel anything. It wasn’t great. I’m fine without it.”
“Maybe the guys were doing it wrong.”
“I don’t think so,” she said. “I think it’s me.”
“You’d feel something if it was me,” Justin said. He sat up fully and moved a little closer.
Molly’s eyes widened. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing, if you don’t want me to.” His eyes moved over her face, down to her mouth. “I guess we shouldn’t make things awkward.”
“I guess not.” She turned to the waves again.
Justin watched Molly watch the waves. Her eyes, already a dark, clear gray blue, darkened and seemed to reflect the waves. Why had he said something so stupid? She’d said she’d never felt anything, and he’d felt he could prove that with him it’d be different. But why would he care to prove something like that? What a stupid thing to say. Now she wouldn’t trust hi—
“But I think it’d be interesting to see,” she said. Her face was smooth, almost elfin in the moonlight, and she tilted it to the side.
“Just a small one.” She said it like she was ordering ice cream.
Justin didn’t know what to do. He thought of how Nicole and Sean would chew him out. He thought about how he could end up hurting her because he didn’t have feelings to give her. But he could give her this. He leaned forward, reached behind her neck with one hand, and brought his lips down to hers.
For a moment, quiet, as his lips settled over hers. Then noises around them, the waves, the wind and spray, and her breathing mixed with his as she was still against him. Slow, quiet, something building up inside him as it went on. And she didn’t moan, didn’t move. Just stayed, keeping the gentle contact between them. Was she feeling the current he felt? As if there was more to this than the touch? He felt excitement build, and it shocked him. He pulled back.
She moved forward and captured his lips with hers, but he pulled away.
“That’s probably enough.”
She sighed. “I’m not good at it, am I?”
“You’re great,” he said. “But I don’t want to take advantage.” He had to somehow build back up the walls around him that had been blown apart in a few quiet moments meshed with her. Her vulnerability had obliterated him. Time to repair.