by Doug Lennick
BEYOND PHYSICAL HEALTH
When Brenda Blake was in her thirties, she and her family moved to Arizona. Brenda became part of a corporate culture that valued golf. Brenda enjoyed the game and being outdoors surrounded by beautiful scenery. But the combination of all that golf and being on the road traveling took its toll on her back. To help relieve her back pain, Brenda started taking a yoga class at her local community center. To her dismay, the yoga class was 90 minutes long. She felt guilty being away from her young sons for that long, and initially didn't understand the value of such a lengthy class. Brenda was also impatient with the meditative aspects of the yoga class, which made her feel sleepy. Brenda understandably wanted an efficient way to improve her back condition so she could keep playing golf. Basically, she wanted a physical solution to a physical problem. And though it was time-consuming, her yoga classes were improving her back condition. Then one day, Brenda decided to take a class at another location. At the end of the session, her teacher encouraged the class to go into a meditative state and just focus on who they were. “Wipe all the roles away—mother, wife, job,” her teacher said. Brenda felt shocked because if she wasn't defined by her roles, she wasn't sure who she was. For Brenda, that was a turning point. She realized that yoga was not just about improving her physical condition. Yoga was a way to help her become all that she wanted to be, both physically and mentally. According to Brenda, “Many people go to yoga for physical reasons and then get addicted to it because it integrates mind/body benefits.” Luckily, that was what happened for Brenda.
Brenda offers several important pieces of advice about promoting optimum health:
First find an activity that engages you so you become “addicted” to it. For Brenda, yoga is one of her positive addictions.
If you find yourself addicted to a physical activity, such as running, balance that by adding a mental practice, such as meditation.
If you're addicted to a mental practice, such as meditation, balance that with a physical activity such as walking or strength training.
* * * * * *
In this chapter, we have focused primarily on practices to improve our health. As we stand at the intersection of money, health, and happiness, it's clear that every step we take to improve our physical health positively affects our financial and emotional health. In the next chapter, we'll complete the virtuous circle of money, health, and happiness. We'll introduce you to a number of effective steps to improve your overall well-being and happiness.
NOTES
1 James Aw, “Art for Life's Sake: The Health Benefits of Culture.” National Post, August 32, 2011, http://nationalpost.com/health/art-for-lifes-sake-the-health-benefits-of-culture/wcm/852da57d-de01-4b2d-bab0-f1488490e67f.
2 Dan Witters, “Naples, Florida, Remains Top US Metro for Well-Being,” Gallup, March 7, 2017, http://www.gallup.com/poll/204536/naples-florida-remains-top-metro.aspx.
3 CrossFit is a branded fitness program of high-intensity varied functional movements based in gymnastics, weightlifting, running, rowing, and other sports, https://www.crossfit.com/what-is-crossfit.
4 Manpower Group defines those born between 1982 and 1996 as Millennials. Goldman Sachs uses a broader range of those born between 1980 and 2000. Other organizations use similar but not identical age ranges.
5 Ann D'Adamo, “The Millennial Approach to Health & Wellness: 10 Amazing Facts,” Women's Marketing, September 30, 2015, http://www.womensmarketing.com/blog/2015/09/the-millennial-approach-to-health-wellness/.
6 Mark Bittner, “How to Save a Trillion Dollars,” New York Times, April 12, 2011, https://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/04/12/how-to-save-a-trillion-dollars/?_r=0. Retrieved May 1, 2017.
7 Reed Tuckson, The Doctor in the Mirror: Living a Longer, Healthier, More Joyful Life Starts with You, United Health Services, 2011.
8 2015 Food and Health Survey, International Food Information Council Foundation, http://www.foodinsight.org/sites/default/files/2015%20Food%20And%20Health%20Survey-%20Executive%20Summary%20-%20Final.pdf. Retrieved April 25, 2017.
9 Ibid.
10 Ibid.
11 Reed Tuckson, The Doctor in the Mirror: Living a Longer, Healthier, More Joyful Life Starts with You, United Health Services, 2011.
12 U.S. Food and Drug Administration, “Preventable Adverse Drug Reactions: A Focus on Drug Interactions,” https://www.fda.gov/drugs/developmentapprovalprocess/developmentresources/druginteractionslabeling/ucm110632.htm. Retrieved July 4, 2017.
13 Dan Buettner, The Blue Zones: 9 Lessons for Living Longer from the People Who've Lived the Longest, 2nd Edition, National Geographic Partners LLC, 2011.
14 Conversation between Dan Buettner and co-author, Doug Lennick, May 21, 2013.
15 Mayo Clinic Staff, “Stress Relief,” http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/basics/stress-relief/hlv-20049495. Retrieved April 28, 2017.
16 Adapted from Jo Marchant, “Think Yourself Healthy,” Prevention Magazine, January 2017.
17 Hannah K. Weir, PhD; Robert N. Anderson, PhD; Sallyann M. Coleman King, MD, MSc; Ashwini Soman, MPH; Trevor D. Thompson, BS; Yuling Hong, MD, MS, PhD; Bjorn Moller, PhD; Steven Leadbetter, MS, “Heart Disease and Cancer Deaths—Trends and Projections in the United States, 1969–2020,” CME ACTIVITY, Volume 13, November 17, 2016, https://www.cdc.gov/pcd/issues/2016/16_0211.htm.
18 World Health Organization, “Cancer Fact Sheet,” February 2017, http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs297/en. Retrieved July 4, 2017.
19 Andrew Stokes and Samuel H. Preston, “Deaths Attributable to Diabetes in the United States: Comparison of Data Sources and Estimation Approaches,” PLOS ONE, January 25, 2017, http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0170219. Retrieved June 19, 2017.
20 Reed V. Tuckson, The Doctor in the Mirror, United Health Services, 2011.
21 “Walk Your Way to Health,” Age UK, http://www.ageuk.org.uk/health-wellbeing/keeping-fit/walk-your-way-to-health/how-walking-can-improve-your-health.
22 Dan Buettner, The Blue Zones: 9 Lessons for Living Longer from the People Who've Lived the Longest, 2nd Edition. National Geographic Partners LLC, 2011, page 46.
23 Heidi Goldman, “Regular exercise changes the brain to improve memory, thinking skills,” Harvard Health Blog, Harvard Medical School, April 9, 2014, http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/regular-exercise-changes-brain-improve-memory-thinking-skills-201404097110. Retrieved May 1, 2017.
24 Reed V. Tuckson, The Doctor in the Mirror, United Health Services, 2011.
25 Sonja Lyubomirsky, The Myths of Happiness: What Should Make You Happy but Doesn't. What Shouldn't Make You Happy but Does, New York: Penguin, 2014, page 23 (paperback).
26 Tao Porchon-Lynch, TaoPorchonLynch.com, http://www.taoporchon-lynch.com/.
27 Sadie Nicholas, “Just a number: Meet the 97-year-old bodybuilder who refuses to retire,” Sunday Express online, http://www.express.co.uk/entertainment/books/762775/bodybuilder-pensioner-retirement-age-just-number-book.
28 Miriam Nelson's bestseller, Strong Women Stay Young, is an excellent guide to strength training for do-it yourselfers.
29 Sadie Nicholas, “Just a number: Meet the 97-year-old bodybuilder who refuses to retire,” Sunday Express online, http://www.express.co.uk/entertainment/books/762775/bodybuilder-pensioner-retirement-age-just-number-book.
30 “Charles Eugster, “Elderly Bodybuilder and Athlete—Obituary,” The Telegraph, May 2, 2017, http://www.telegraph.co.uk/obituaries/2017/05/02/charles-eugster-elderly-bodybuilder-athlete-obituary.
Chapter Six
Happiness
Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.
—Aristotle
Jean and Howdy Mathiasen are wonderful, active newlyweds who both recently celebrated their eightieth birthdays. Everyone who knows them says that Jean and Howdy are the happiest couple they've ever seen. But life hasn't always been kind to them. Howdy's first wife died after a nine-year battle
with cancer. Thirty years ago, in his late forties, Howdy suffered a serious stroke, which practically destroyed his short-term memory, and cost him his job as a successful bank executive. Howdy had always been a walker, but after his stroke, and living on disability income, he decided he should walk even more. He spent more time improving his golf game. Howdy also developed strategies to compensate for his poor memory, such as a notebook that he writes everything down in to remind him of what's happening and what needs to be done. Jean's first marriage was very troubled. She was a stay-at-home mom of three, who had to go back to work when her alcoholic husband became unable to support the family. Jean didn't make much money, so she had to be frugal. Jean's daughter, Caroline, recalls her mother's mantra when she was growing up—“Health Is Wealth.” Caroline must have heard that a thousand times. Jean put a lot of emphasis on preparing nutritious meals for her family. According to Caroline, “My mom's idea of dessert was a homemade bran muffin.” In those years, produce was cheaper than fast food, but for an occasional dinner, Jean would “treat” her kids with their favorite McDonald's hamburgers. If she had a little extra money, she'd splurge and buy them fries as well. Jean also stayed physically active. No matter how busy Jean was with work and kids, she found time every day for her walks. Jean's life circumstances were stressful, but she did everything she could to maintain her own and her children's health and well-being.
Today, Jean and Howdy, who first met in fourth grade, are an amazingly contented and joyful couple who give each other credit for their high level of happiness. Howdy says, “Jean makes me happy. As we've been together longer and longer, she makes me happier and happier. We like to do things together.” Jean adds, “Howard is the most important part of my happiness. I always say that this is the happiest I've ever been in my life. We fit together well. We really appreciate each other. We were in our seventies when we got together so we appreciate every day. We appreciate feeling good.” Most of their happiness doesn't come by accident. They walk together almost every day, chatting about whatever is on their minds while enjoying spectacular views of the Rocky Mountains that tower to the west of their suburban Denver townhome. Several times a week, they go to the gym to work out. Jean also practices yoga. And Howdy frequently plays golf. They socialize with friends, enjoying movie matinees followed by dinners full of laughter. They're learning new skills. Recently Jean, a talented pianist, started a bartering arrangement with a friend who is fluent in Spanish. Once a week, they get together. Jean gives her friend a half-hour piano lesson. Then her friend gives Jean and Howdy a half-hour Spanish lesson. Jean and Howdy don't have a lot of money. In fact, they recently had to get a line of credit to help pay for a new roof. But they don't feel financially stressed because they know how to pay off that debt no matter what the future holds. Jean and Howdy are wealthy in all the ways that count—they are together, they're financially stable, they have good friendships, and they're healthy. What a recipe for happiness!
FINDING YOUR HAPPINESS RECIPE
Sonja Lyubomirsky, a psychologist who studies happiness, has summarized all the research on factors that determine happiness. Fifty percent of our happiness is a matter of our genetics. It's true that each of us has an inborn happiness level. Some of us are naturally happier than others. Another 10 percent of our happiness is a function of life circumstances. That means that conditions related to finances, health, marital status, or career affect our happiness. But even when circumstances throw us off balance, we are never completely at their mercy. Why? Because 40 percent of our happiness is determined by how we behave.1 We always have a choice about how to respond to life's challenges. We can behave in ways that make us miserable. But if we're wise, we can take action to restore or improve our happiness level. Co-author Doug was recently reminded of the power of behavior to affect personal well-being during a very difficult time in his family's life.
A few years ago, Doug found himself unexpectedly under stress because of a number of challenging family circumstances over the course of eight months. First came his daughter's divorce, which was heartbreaking not only because it was painful to watch his daughter suffer, but also because Doug's family considered her spouse part of the Lennick family, so it was a personal loss for him as well. Then his father-in-law ended up in a nursing home following a fall in his home that accelerated his dementia. Not long after, Doug turned 63, the age his mother had been when she died. Everyone who has reached the age of a parent's death knows how strange and sad that feels, though there is no good word to describe it. Then his son's father-in-law died, another painful event, even more so because of the closeness between the Lennicks and Doug's daughter-in-law's family. As much as Doug practiced self-awareness, he thought he was fine. He wasn't. Family is one of Doug's top values, and having so many tough life events happen to his family in such a short time rocked him emotionally.
In response to Doug's emotional stress, Doug's physical health began to deteriorate. He found himself eating more junk food, eventually gaining some unwanted extra weight. He managed to catch a case of poison ivy so severe that two doctors labeled it the worst case they'd ever seen. He had to take powerful steroid medication, which in turn gave him high blood pressure. So, Doug then had to take medication to lower his blood pressure. The worse he felt physically, the worse he felt emotionally. Doug found himself worrying, not just about his family's current problems, but also about other negative things that might happen. He started imagining his own worst-case scenarios: “What if I became incapacitated or died? Would there be enough money for medical expenses? Would Beth Ann be okay?” Even though Doug followed the Smart Money Philosophy, he still obsessed about the idea that something could happen which would threaten his family's financial security. Doug was unhappy, unhealthy, and on a few occasions uncharacteristically irritable. But Doug was fortunate to have the support of his wife, Beth Ann, his children, and even his son-in-law and daughter-in-law, who began to give him feedback about his mood and other unhealthy behaviors. Those were the wake-up calls that helped Doug get back on track. Doug amped up his workout schedule and revamped his diet. Doug also tackled the source of worry about his family's future. He wanted to make sure that no matter what happened to him, he and his wife Beth Ann would be financially secure. So, Doug met with his financial advisor to double-check that he was prepared for the certainty of uncertainty. Within six months or so, Doug's sense of well-being was restored to a great degree. Everything is not perfect for Doug's family. Like every family, they still have challenges. But Doug is back to his more typical happy self. He is relying on what Sonja Lyubomirsky calls “the 40 percent solution”2—the percentage of our happiness that we can control by our actions. In alignment model terms, Doug is using the WDYWFY goal achievement process to align his behavior with his values of family and happiness.
HAPPINESS IS MORE THAN A CHEERFUL MOOD
Martin Seligman is known as one of the founders of the “Positive Psychology” movement. For most of the history of the field of psychology, research was focused on helping people overcome “negative” mental states such as depression and anxiety. Seligman and his colleagues shook up the psychology research community when they decided to focus their work on an area of inquiry that many skeptical psychologists didn't take seriously: understanding positive mental states such as happiness and developing tools to help people get more out of life. Seligman's original model was called “Authentic Happiness.” According to Seligman, happiness includes three factors: positive emotion, engagement, and meaning. Positive emotion is the element that most of us think of as happiness—pleasure, excitement, contentment, and so on. The second factor, “engagement,” is about the state you are in when fully absorbed in an activity, say playing a musical instrument, working on an art project, or running through the woods. Engagement isn't an emotional state at all. When fully engaged in something, you're not consciously aware of thinking or feeling anything—you just “are.”3 Engagement is similar to what psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
calls “flow.”4 It's a deeply satisfying experience that is impossible to describe using the vocabulary of emotions.
According to Seligman, the third aspect of happiness is meaning. Imagine if your definition of happiness included only the first two aspects of Seligman's Authentic Happiness model: You feel good and you have experiences of being totally engaged in desirable activities. Let's say you're generally enjoying your life, feeling enjoyment while travelling for pleasure or eating wonderful food at the latest destination restaurant, and you periodically engage in an activity, say a favorite video game, that puts you in a state of “flow” or complete absorption. Are these two elements, positive emotions and engagement, enough to give you true happiness? For most people, the answer is no. When it comes to happiness, we can “feel” good and we can be engaged in absorbing activities, but what if those pursuits are trivial? A great meal can delight us, and a video game can fully absorb us, but they are temporary experiences. True happiness comes from engaging in experiences that provide meaning. As Seligman points out:
Human beings, ineluctably, want meaning and purpose in life. The Meaningful Life consists in belonging to and serving something that you believe is bigger than the self, and humanity creates all the positive institutions to allow this: religion, political party, being green, the Boy Scouts, or the family.5
Richard Leider echoes Seligman's perspective on the connection between purpose and happiness. In one of his blog posts, Leider reminds us that “A sense of life purpose promotes physical, mental, and spiritual health. People who seek meaning beyond themselves are healthier, happier, and live longer.”6 Sonja Lyubomirsky, whose research on happiness we've referred to before, offers a similar point of view to that of Seligman and Leider. She uses the term happiness to refer to “the experience of joy, contentment, or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one's life is good, meaningful, and worthwhile.” Lyubomirsky's research also confirms that working to achieve goals is an essential component of happiness.7 Co-author Roy Geer, who developed the WDYWFY model for goal achievement 50 years ago, could not have agreed more with those findings.