_How_ THE GENERAL MET THE FIRST AND FOREMOST
CHAPTER ELEVEN
On leaving the Growleywogs General Guph had to recross the Ripple Lands,and he did not find it a pleasant thing to do. Perhaps having hiswhiskers pulled out one by one and being used as a pin-cushion for theinnocent amusement of a good natured jailor had not improved the qualityof Guph's temper, for the old Nome raved and raged at the recollectionof the wrongs he had suffered, and vowed to take vengeance upon theGrowleywogs after he had used them for his purposes and Oz had beenconquered. He went on in this furious way until he was half across theRipple Land. Then he became seasick, and the rest of the way thisnaughty Nome was almost as miserable as he deserved to be.
But when he reached the plains again and the ground was firm under hisfeet he began to feel better, and instead of going back home he turneddirectly west. A squirrel, perched in a tree, saw him take this roadand called to him warningly: "Look out!" But he paid no attention. Aneagle paused in its flight through the air to look at him wonderinglyand say: "Look out!" But on he went.
No one can say that Guph was not brave, for he had determined to visitthose dangerous creatures the Phanfasms, who resided upon the very topof the dread Mountain of Phantastico. The Phanfasms were Erbs, and sodreaded by mortals and immortals alike that no one had been near theirmountain home for several thousand years. Yet General Guph hoped toinduce them to join in his proposed warfare against the good and happyOz people.
Guph knew very well that the Phanfasms would be almost as dangerous tothe Nomes as they would to the Ozites, but he thought himself so cleverthat he believed that he could manage these strange creatures and makethem obey him. And there was no doubt at all that if he could enlist theservices of the Phanfasms their tremendous power, united to the strengthof the Growleywogs and the cunning of the Whimsies would doom the Landof Oz to absolute destruction.
So the old Nome climbed the foothills and trudged along the wildmountain paths until he came to a big gully that encircled the Mountainof Phantastico and marked the boundary line of the dominion of thePhanfasms. This gully was about a third of the way up the mountain, andit was filled to the brim with red-hot molten lava, in which swamfire-serpents and poisonous salamanders. The heat from this mass and itspoisonous smell were both so unbearable that even birds hesitated to flyover the gully, but circled around it. All living things kept away fromthe mountain.
Now Guph had heard, during his long lifetime, many tales of thesedreaded Phanfasms; so he had heard of this barrier of melted lava, andalso he had been told that there was a narrow bridge that spanned it inone place. So he walked along the edge until he found the bridge. It wasa single arch of gray stone, and lying flat upon this bridge was ascarlet alligator, seemingly fast asleep.
When Guph stumbled over the rocks in approaching the bridge the creatureopened its eyes, from which tiny flames shot in all directions, andafter looking at the intruder very wickedly the scarlet alligator closedits eyelids again and lay still.
Guph saw there was no room for him to pass the alligator on the narrowbridge, so he called out to it:
"Good morning, friend. I don't wish to hurry you, but please tell me ifyou are coming down, or going up?"
"Neither," snapped the alligator, clicking its cruel jaws together.
The General hesitated.
"Are you likely to stay there long?" he asked.
"A few hundred years or so," said the alligator.
Guph softly rubbed the end of his nose and tried to think what to do.
"Do you know whether the First and Foremost Phanfasm of Phantastico isat home or not?" he presently inquired.
"I expect he is, seeing he is always at home," replied the alligator.
"Ah; who is that coming down the mountain?" asked the Nome, gazingupward.
The alligator turned to look over its shoulder, and at once Guph ran tothe bridge and leaped over the sentinel's back before it could turn backagain. The scarlet monster made a snap at the Nome's left foot, butmissed it by fully an inch.
"Ah ha!" laughed the General, who was now on the mountain path. "Ifooled you that time."
"So you did; and perhaps you fooled yourself," retorted the alligator."Go up the mountain, if you dare, and find out what the First andForemost will do to you!"
"I will," declared Guph, boldly; and on he went up the path.
At first the scene was wild enough, but gradually it grew more and moreawful in appearance. All the rocks had the shapes of frightful beingsand even the tree trunks were gnarled and twisted like serpents.
Suddenly there appeared before the Nome a man with the head of an owl.His body was hairy, like that of an ape, and his only clothing was ascarlet scarf twisted around his waist. He bore a huge club in his handand his round owl eyes blinked fiercely upon the intruder.
"What are you doing here?" he demanded, threatening Guph with his club.
"I've come to see the First and Foremost Phanfasm of Phantastico,"replied the General, who did not like the way this creature looked athim, but still was not afraid.
"Ah; you shall see him!" the man said, with a sneering laugh. "The Firstand Foremost shall decide upon the best way to punish you."
"He will not punish me," returned Guph, calmly, "for I have come here todo him and his people a rare favor. Lead on, fellow, and take medirectly to your master."
The owl-man raised his club with a threatening gesture.
"If you try to escape," he said, "beware--"
But here the General interrupted him.
"Spare your threats," said he, "and do not be impertinent, or I willhave you severely punished. Lead on, and keep silent!"
This Guph was really a clever rascal, and it seems a pity he was so bad,for in a good cause he might have accomplished much. He realized that hehad put himself into a dangerous position by coming to this dreadfulmountain, but he also knew that if he showed fear he was lost. So headopted a bold manner as his best defense. The wisdom of this plan wassoon evident, for the Phanfasm with the owl's head turned and led theway up the mountain.
At the very top was a level plain, upon which were heaps of rock that atfirst glance seemed solid. But on looking closer Guph discovered thatthese rock heaps were dwellings, for each had an opening.
Not a person was to be seen outside the rock huts. All was silent.
The owl-man led the way among the groups of dwellings to one standing inthe center. It seemed no better and no worse than any of the others.Outside the entrance to this rock heap the guide gave a low wail thatsounded like "Lee-ow-ah!"
Suddenly there bounded from the opening another hairy man. This one worethe head of a bear. In his hand he bore a brass hoop. He glared at thestranger in evident surprise.
"Why have you captured this foolish wanderer and brought him here?" hedemanded, addressing the owl-man.
"I did not capture him," was the answer. "He passed the scarletalligator and came here of his own free will and accord."
The First and Foremost looked at the General.
"Have you tired of life, then?" he asked.
"No, indeed," answered Guph. "I am a Nome, and the Chief General of KingRoquat the Red's great army of Nomes. I come of a long-lived race, and Imay say that I expect to live a long time yet. Sit down, youPhanfasms--if you can find a seat in this wild haunt--and listen to whatI have to say."
With all his knowledge and bravery General Guph did not know that thesteady glare from the bear eyes was reading his inmost thoughts assurely as if they had been put into words. He did not know that thesedespised rock heaps of the Phanfasms were merely deceptions to his owneyes, nor could he guess that he was standing in the midst of one of themost splendid and luxurious cities ever built by magic power. All thathe saw was a barren waste of rock heaps, a hairy man with an owl's headand another with a bear's head. The sorcery of the Phanfasms permittedhim to see no more.
Suddenly the First and Foremost swung his brass hoop and caught Gupharound the neck with it. The next instant, befor
e the General couldthink what had happened to him, he was dragged inside the rock hut.Here, his eyes still blinded to realities, he perceived only a dimlight, by which the hut seemed as rough and rude inside as it wasoutside. Yet he had a strange feeling that many bright eyes werefastened upon him and that he stood in a vast and extensive hall.
The First and Foremost now laughed grimly and released his prisoner.
"If you have anything to say that is interesting," he remarked, "speakout, before I strangle you."
So Guph spoke out. He tried not to pay any attention to a strangerustling sound that he heard, as of an unseen multitude drawing near tolisten to his words. His eyes could see only the fierce bear-man, and tohim he addressed his speech. First he told of his plan to conquer theLand of Oz and plunder the country of its riches and enslave its people,who, being fairies, could not be killed. After relating all this, andtelling of the tunnel the Nome King was building, he said he had come toask the First and Foremost to join the Nomes, with his band of terriblewarriors, and help them to defeat the Oz people.
The General spoke very earnestly and impressively, but when he hadfinished the bear-man began to laugh as if much amused, and his laughterseemed to be echoed by a chorus of merriment from an unseen multitude.Then, for the first time, Guph began to feel a trifle worried.
"Who else has promised to help you?" finally asked the First andForemost.
"The Whimsies," replied the General.
Again the bear-headed Phanfasm laughed.
"Any others?" he inquired.
"Only the Growleywogs," said Guph.
This answer set the First and Foremost laughing anew.
"What share of the spoils am I to have?" was the next question.
"Anything you like, except King Roquat's Magic Belt," replied Guph.
At this the Phanfasm set up a roar of laughter, which had its echo inthe unseen chorus, and the bear-man seemed so amused that he actuallyrolled upon the ground and shouted with merriment.
"Oh, these blind and foolish Nomes!" he said. "How big they seem tothemselves and how small they really are!"
Suddenly he arose and seized Guph's neck with one hairy paw, dragginghim out of the hut into the open.
Here he gave a curious wailing cry, and, as if in answer, from all therocky huts on the mountain-top came flocking a horde of Phanfasms, allwith hairy bodies, but wearing heads of various animals, birds andreptiles. All were ferocious and repulsive-looking to the deceived eyesof the Nome, and Guph could not repress a shudder of disgust as helooked upon them.
The First and Foremost slowly raised his arms, and in a twinkling hishairy skin fell from him and he appeared before the astonished Nome as abeautiful woman, clothed in a flowing gown of pink gauze. In her darkhair flowers were entwined, and her face was noble and calm.
At the same instant the entire band of Phanfasms was transformed into apack of howling wolves, running here and there as they snarled andshowed their ugly yellow fangs.
The woman now raised her arms, even as the man-bear had done, and in atwinkling the wolves became crawling lizards, while she herself changedinto a huge butterfly.
Guph had only time to cry out in fear and take a step backward to avoidthe lizards when another transformation occurred, and all returnedinstantly to the forms they had originally worn.
Then the First and Foremost, who had resumed his hairy body and bearhead, turned to the Nome and asked:
"Do you still demand our assistance?"
"More than ever," answered the General, firmly.
"Then tell me: what can you offer the Phanfasms that they have notalready?" inquired the First and Foremost.
Guph hesitated. He really did not know what to say. The Nome King'svaunted Magic Belt seemed a poor thing compared to the astonishingmagical powers of these people. Gold, jewels and slaves they mightsecure in any quantity without especial effort. He felt that he wasdealing with powers greatly beyond him. There was but one argument thatmight influence the Phanfasms, who were creatures of evil.
"Permit me to call your attention to the exquisite joy of making thehappy unhappy," said he at last. "Consider the pleasure of destroyinginnocent and harmless people."
"Ah! you have answered me," cried the First and Foremost. "For thatreason alone we will aid you. Go home, and tell your bandy-legged kingthat as soon as his tunnel is finished the Phanfasms will be with himand lead his legions to the conquest of Oz. The deadly desert alone haskept us from destroying Oz long ago, and your underground tunnel is aclever thought. Go home, and prepare for our coming!"
Guph was very glad to be permitted to go with this promise. The owl-manled him back down the mountain path and ordered the scarlet alligator tocrawl away and allow the Nome to cross the bridge in safety.
After the visitor had gone a brilliant and gorgeous city appeared uponthe mountain top, clearly visible to the eyes of the gaily dressedmultitude of Phanfasms that lived there. And the First and Foremost,beautifully arrayed, addressed the others in these words:
"It is time we went into the world and brought sorrow and dismay to itspeople. Too long have we remained by ourselves upon this mountain top,for while we are thus secluded many nations have grown happy andprosperous, and the chief joy of the race of Phanfasms is to destroyhappiness. So I think it is lucky that this messenger from the Nomesarrived among us just now, to remind us that the opportunity has comefor us to make trouble. We will use King Roquat's tunnel to conquer theLand of Oz. Then we will destroy the Whimsies, the Growleywogs and theNomes, and afterward go out to ravage and annoy and grieve the wholeworld."
The multitude of evil Phanfasms eagerly applauded this plan, which theyfully approved.
I am told that the Erbs are the most powerful and merciless of all theevil spirits, and the Phanfasms of Phantastico belong to the race ofErbs.
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