And as accepted and loved as that made him feel, Loki had trouble coming up with reasons why Jack wanted him so much when he hardly got anything in return. Loki was trouble, financial loss, someone who never had a real job and now struggled with writing his own name. He had no idea how he would ever repay Jack for all that he was getting from this relationship.
“I’m going back with you. That’s something,” said Loki, stepping into the elevator. There was a mirror on its wall, reminding Loki of the new S-shaped scar on the shaved side of his head, now covered with bandages that made him look like the victim of some terrible hate crime.
“We’re gonna have separate rooms at the clubhouse. I’ll work out something better in a few weeks. With the prices these hospitals charge, doctors are the true fucking outlaws.”
Loki gave Jack a swift hug, but the moment they touched, the elevator was already on the ground floor, and he had to pull away. “I get it.” He didn’t even try to ask Jack how he could repay him, because there was no way he’d ever earn enough money to do that, but the buzz of guilt never let him have his peace for long. He felt like such a useless human being sometimes. He couldn’t even cook so that Jack would have a nice meal after coming home. He’d learn if he didn’t contribute anything to their budget.
Jack took a deep, raspy breath and looked at Loki with such tenderness, it was hard to comprehend. “I’m so happy you’re alive.”
There it was, the validation Loki craved, right when he needed it. He swallowed hard, walking through the hospital lobby with his gaze glued to Jack’s face. From Jack of all people, a rough outlaw, he received the attention and kindness he always dreamt of, something even his own family never gave him. There were so many guys prettier than him, with less baggage, and Jack still wanted him. As guilty as Loki felt about the mayhem he’d unleashed on Jack’s life, he refused to let it spoil their life together. “I know. I’ll help with everything you need me to do. I’m gonna take care of you,” he said as they walked out into the bright sunlight.
“Yeah, yeah, I know.” Jack snorted. Clearly, he didn’t believe Loki, but that was only motivating to prove him wrong. “I’ve come in your ride,” he said and led the way through the parking lot, but Loki couldn’t spot his car.
“Hey, I’m gonna learn, you know. At least you’re not into fancy-shmancy stuff. Don’t you want me to?” muttered Loki. He would vacuum once a week, he would do laundry, and he’d get the food piping hot... somehow.
“I want you to get better. Just heal, and I’m sure you’ll learn everything you want later.”
Loki bumped into Jack when they stopped in front of a car that looked a lot like Jack’s old ride. It even had black flames painted at the back, but after a moment, he realized the shape was all wrong, and the little nodding dog at the back only confirmed his suspicion - it was Loki’s own car, fixed after the accident and looking good as new.
“Oh. My. God. You repainted it?” asked Loki, grabbing Jack’s forearm as his knees softened too much. “It’s so beautiful. Looks brand new.”
“You like it? Sam fixed the front.” Jack gave Loki a toothy grin. “I did the paintwork so it looks like it’s wearing my old car. Like those serial killers wearing their victims’ skin.”
Loki burst out laughing, shifting his feet back and forth. It was both a romantic and disturbing declaration. “Like you want to cover me? I want to kiss you so much right now.”
“I wanna lick your face so bad it’s making my dick hurt, so let’s just go home, huh?” Jack said and made his way to the driver’s seat, looking a bit deflated.
Loki exhaled, unsure what he’d done to disappoint Jack. Had he not been enthusiastic enough? Was Jack worried they wouldn’t be able to fuck?
Loki bit his lip and slowly climbed into the passenger seat. Jack was such a big man that he took up much more space in the driver’s seat than Loki did. Without thinking, Loki put his hand on Jack’s thick thigh as they left the hospital parking lot. “What’s up?”
Jack sighed and wouldn’t look at him. “I can’t kiss you in public. I probably never will.”
Loki swallowed, drawn to his handsome face like a moth to the brightest flame it’s ever seen. He wasn’t sure what to make of that statement. “Oh... yeah, that’s a shame, isn’t it?” he asked, smiling at Jack to dissolve the sudden tension.
“I’m sorry,” Jack uttered as he drove toward the clubhouse and put his hand on Loki’s.
Loki’s heart clenched. Was Jack worried about it for him? “It’s fine. I mean... it would be nice if we could, but I know you can’t. I get it.”
“Are you sure?” Jack finally gave him a glance. “You’re the first guy I’m with this way, and I can’t stop thinking that I’m gonna fuck this up somehow.”
Loki turned up his hand and entwined his fingers with Jack’s. “My other boyfriends were out with me, and I wasn’t the first for them, but they didn’t care for me like you do. Do you think either of them would even consider giving up so much for someone like me?”
“Won’t you get tired of it? The constant hiding? I’d like to tell the whole world about you, but I can’t.” Jack tightened his jaw so hard his teeth screeched.
Loki couldn’t help a smile spreading across his lips. “Won’t you get tired of a selfish prick like me?”
Jack laughed, but there was a hint of nervousness in his voice. “Not if he sucks dick the way you do.”
Loki pulled his thumb over the sensitive side of Jack’s finger. Typical Jack. So macho. But as much as Loki wanted them to be acknowledged as a couple, without lies and fear of being found out, he knew he couldn’t ask Jack for changing his life even more than he already had. He’d never again push Jack into something he wasn’t ready for.
“Then I won’t be tired of the hottest stud I’ve met.”
“Someone’s gonna have to jerk you off. With your thumb gone and all.” Jack turned into a smaller street, and Loki could already recognize the tall walls of the club building far away.
He pulled up Jack’s hand and brushed his lips over the scabs on his knuckles. “I can be your cousin as long as we can be together behind closed doors. I promise to always stalk you. But in a good way.”
Jack snorted. “There’s a good way to stalk? I learn every day.”
Loki chuckled and let him go as they approached the gate. “I suppose there must be.”
A prospect opened the gate for them, and Jack drove into the familiar courtyard, which at this time of day was empty. Loki was glad. The last thing he needed was everyone seeing him in the shitty outfit and with greasy hair, straight from hospital.
They parked and got out of the car. “You ready to see your brand-new room?” Jack asked and lit himself a cigarette.
Loki grinned, more than ready to freely embrace Jack after the long thirst in the hospital. For the first time in his life, he’d met someone who was ready to sacrifice their own comfort for him. He was ready to do the same in return. “Yes, Jack.”
Jack took a deep breath of smoke and went in first, leading Loki through the sparsely populated lounge. As they headed toward the door leading to a member only area, a young doe-eyed girl stopped Jack after rushing all the way from a set of leather sofas across the room. Loki scowled, immediately recognizing her pumped-up lips, which looked even larger than when she spoke to him last time.
“Hey, Red. I heard you don’t have HIV anymore.” She gave Jack a wide, dreamy smile. Loki could bet his other thumb that she was stoned. He scowled, wishing he never told Lucy that lie. Jack had to feel so humiliated every time someone brought it up. Well, at least he took it as a valuable lesson and finally checked himself. How, Loki had no idea, but Jack was healthy like a young bull.
“Yeah. Never had it in the first place.” Jack shook his head and gently peeled the girl’s fingers off his forearm. “Got me a scare though. I don’t dip my dick just anywhere anymore.”
She blinked, and it was only when Loki followed Jack and walked past her that she seemed to re
alize Jack had just insulted her. “Oh, you think you’re such hot stuff? I was asking because I worry about all the guys in the club!”
Loki ignored her, staring at Jack’s back with a serious case of doe eyes himself. He’d been worried all the time spent in hospital whether Jack would be able to steer clear of girls for such a long time without Loki to keep his needs satisfied. But it seemed that nothing had happened, because otherwise this girl would surely know Jack was back on the market.
“You don’t like her?” he asked casually once they walked up the staircase and entered a corridor that wasn’t open into the courtyard. It had tacky red wallpaper and posters on the walls, but Loki was too focused on the blue gaze.
Jack stopped in front of a door and squinted at Loki. “What do you think?”
Loki exhaled and looked away, suddenly worried that maybe Jack didn’t want to listen to any of this. “We’re exclusive?”
Jack stepped forward, making Loki back into the wall, and looked around the empty corridor. “You surprised? You fucked some hot doc at the hospital?” he asked, making Loki feel like a fly pinned to a foam board. But he was the only trophy that mattered in Jack’s collection.
Loki’s shoulders hugged the wall as he looked up into Jack’s cool, intimidating eyes, but even despite the slight unease, his fingers still wormed their way into Jack’s beard. “I didn’t fuck anyone. I don’t want to,” he added more firmly. “You?”
“I’m so fucking horny I could fuck your armpit,” Jack whispered with his gaze locked with Loki’s.
A melting sensation spread all over Loki’s chest, and he let out a strangled whimper just imagining that lovely, thick cock against his skin. “Because you want to be exclusive too and haven’t fucked anyone all this time?”
Jack nodded slowly and spoke with a rasp that made his words barely recognizable. “Yeah, jerked off twice a day thinking about my name on your back and my dick in your tight ass.”
Loki chuckled, and it came out more nervous than he’d have liked. This was such a relief. Loki purposefully tried not to think about it, but he didn’t know if he could cope with Jack fucking girls on the side. “I think you should make that our reality.”
Jack exuded the kind of heat Loki wanted to melt into. He took one more look down the corridor and grabbed Loki’s hand as he opened the door.
“I wanna make these sheets sweaty,” Jack said as he led Loki into the small, but strangely cozy room with gray walls and a set of shelves that contained Loki’s clothes tidily folded. There was a vase of fresh flowers by the window, and a poster of a half-naked girl bent over a bike on one of the walls.
Loki raised an eyebrow at Jack. “That’s my room?”
Jack locked the door. “Oh, that. Never got round to taking it down.”
Loki grinned at him and looked around, spotting items from Jack’s former house, including pillows from the living room and Loki’s favorite mug. Hanging over the bed was one of the golden rims of Jack’s precious bike. Loki smiled and gently brushed his palm over yet another thing he recognized—the luxurious sheets from Jack’s old bedroom.
Jack pointed to the rim on the wall. “I’ve got the other one in my room.” There was a moment of silence, and then his large, warm palm covered Loki’s nape. It was as if all the fear and uncertainty dropped off Loki’s shoulders.
He looked up, resting the back of his head in the valley between Jack’s thumb and index finger. “I love when you do that,” he whispered.
“Are you sure you feel well enough? I get it if you’re not all there yet,” Jack said, but there was a rasp to his voice and an intensity in his eyes that had Loki’s skin burning up by the second.
“I’ve missed you,” he said, blindly seeking Jack’s other hand. “We can go slow and see if it’s okay.”
Jack stepped closer to give him a tender kiss. “As soon as you’re all healed up, we’ll go hunting for the other three bastards,” he whispered, and it sounded like the most romantic of love confessions. “You ready for that?”
Loki turned in Jack’s arms and inhaled the familiar scent of Jack’s beard oil. He would mess up the perfectly groomed hair tonight, but he knew Jack wouldn’t mind.
“So ready.”
The end
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K. A. Merikan are a team of writers, who are mistaken for sisters with surprising regularity. Kat’s the mean sergeant and survival specialist of the duo, never hesitating to kick Agnes’s ass when she’s slacking off. Her memory works like an easy-access catalogue, which allows her to keep up with both book details and social media. Also works as the emergency GPS. Agnes is the Merikan nitpicker, usually found busy with formatting and research. Her attention tends to be scattered, and despite pushing thirty, she needs to apply makeup to buy alcohol. Self-proclaimed queen of the roads.
They love the weird and wonderful, stepping out of the box, and bending stereotypes both in life and books. When you pick up a Merikan book, one thing you can be sure of - it will be full of surprises.
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The Devil’s Ride
Sex & Mayhem #2
— You don’t fuck with the club president’s son. —
Tooth. Vice President of the Coffin Nails Motorcycle Club. On a neverending quest for vengeance. The last thing he needs is becoming a permanent babysitter for a male hooker.
Lucifer. Fallen. Lost. Alone.
After a childhood filled with neglect and abuse, followed by his mother’s suicide, Lucifer set out into the world alone. There was nothing for him out there other than taking it one day at a time. As the bastard son of the Coffin Nails club president, Lucifer never got much fatherly love. So when the Nails show up at the strip joint Lucifer works in, the last thing he expects is to be put in the custody of Tooth, the Vice President famous for his gruesome interrogation techniques. The man proves to be the sexiest beast Lucifer has ever met. He’s also older, straight, and an itch Luci can’t ever scratch.
Tooth’s life came to a halt twelve years ago. His lover got brutally murdered, police never found the perpetrators, and all leads were dead ends. To find peace and his own justice, Tooth joined the Coffin Nails, but years on, he’s gotten nowhere with the case, yet still lives on with the burning fire for revenge.
Babysitting a deeply scarred teenager with a talent for disappearing is the last thing on his bucket list. He promised himself to never get attached to someone like him again. To make sure the openly gay boy is safe in the clubhouse, Tooth is stuck keeping an eye on him. The big, blue, attention seeking gaze is drawing Tooth in, but fucking the president’s son is a complete no-go, even when both their feelings go beyond lust.
What Tooth doesn’t know is that Lucifer might hold the key to the closure Tooth so desperately needs.
POSSIBLE SPOILERS:
WARNING Contains adult content: a gritty storyline, sex, explicit language, violence and abuse. Inappropriate use of dental tools and milk.
Themes: Prostitution, Outlaw Motorcycle Club, organized crime, homophobia, family issues, coming out, discipline/punishment, organ snatch
ing, hurt-comfort, age gap
Genre: contemporary homoerotic dark romance
Available at all major retailers
Guns n’ Boys
K.A. Merikan
--- Love is sour like a Sicilian lemon. ---
The Family is always right.
The Family doesn’t forget.
The Family pays for blood in blood.
Domenico Acerbi grew up in the shade of Sicilian lemon trees ready to give his life for the Family. Ready to follow orders and exceed expectations. A proud man of honor.
When Seth, the younger son of the Don is kidnapped, it’s Domenico who is sent to get him back. The man he finds though, is not the boy he knew all those years ago. Lazy, annoying, spoiled, and as hot as a Sicilian summer.
Seth Villani wants nothing to do with the mafia. Unfortunately, he doesn’t get a say when the Family pulls him right back into its fold after his mother’s death. Thrown into a den of serpents otherwise known as the Villani Family, Seth has to find a way to navigate in the maze of lies. But when Domenico Acerbi, the most vicious snake of them all, sinks his fangs into Seth, the venom changes into an aphrodisiac that courses through Seth’s veins.
Domenico knows his life is about to change when he gets the order to train Seth up to the role of future Don. Seth isn’t made for it. He isn’t even made. But a man Domenico knows he would never have to fear might just be someone he’s always needed.
Red Hot Page 32