“That would be grim work, not something I’d want to do.” Mia paused, then said, “What I’m looking for is the skill to know how to defend myself. I’m not interested in becoming a soldier or warrior, and I don’t want to join your squad to go on missions. I’m not called to do that. However, I want to be able to defend myself. I’ve had more than enough experiences where trouble came looking for me. If backed into a corner, it would be better to be equipped with the knowledge, and skill, to keep a squad of demons or monsters at bay. If I can.”
Ethan said, “Women often have better technique as fencers than men do. They are naturally more observant where body language is concerned, and can read the signals when their opponent telegraphs their next move. But there’s no substitute for strength and speed in fencing. Generally speaking, the average man is stronger and quicker than the average woman. Knowing she is at a strength disadvantage, a woman can try to make up the difference by having a more complete strategy in mind during the match. While the man is attacking aggressively, he may leave open an opening when making a decisive move like a lunge, for example. But in spite of that, the man will most likely prevail. So if you find yourself unevenly matched in a battle, you need to immediately find a way to seek help or join the fight with someone. Don’t try to test your skills in the situation, don’t wait to see if you need help before asking for it.”
Answering the look on her face, he said, “Be governed by the advice you receive, Mia. Things can happen in a flash in battle as well as on the piste, and there might not be a second chance to call for help. Fortunately, you have an unfair advantage over both men and women. You know what we are thinking and can take advantage of this when you are in a duel or combat. However, you can’t count on this advantage to be enough to protect you in a battle.”
“I can’t read your mind, Ethan,” Mia said. “You know I can’t.”
Ethan said, “Poe-tay-toe, po-tah-tuh. You may not know that you know, but your actions show you often know what’s coming before it arrives.”
“Guess that makes me a natural. What can I say?” Mia smiled at him. “I could try thinking left handed if you believe it would help.”
Ethan laughed, then smiled and shook his head. “As you wish, Mia. As you wish.”
One day Mia and Kit were walking in the forest along the river. Taking a deep breath in preparation for bringing up a thorny issue, she wasn’t sure how this conversation would go. But the issue was crucial to her, so she felt she had to attempt talking to Kit about it. She started by saying, “I’m so glad to have this opportunity to get to know you, Kit. It’s better than anything I ever imagined. Because it would make sense to me if you had refused to meet me, if you hadn’t wanted to forgive me. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your forgiveness. It’s wonderful knowing that you have a good life here, nothing like the Limbo that Dante wrote about, cut off from all of God’s blessings. But what happened to you isn’t what God intended when you were conceived. And I don’t want to take your forgiveness for granted. I would like to understand how it was that you could forgive me even though my guilt and blame is so great.”
Bowing his head to look at the ground, Kit waited several moments before replying, walking silently beside Mia under the trees along the path. “I can’t say forgiving you was easy for me, not at all. I may never know everything I was denied by not being born, but I am certainly aware there have been losses, immense losses that create an enduring burden and sorrow. Nothing will ever make up for the life I never lived. Whatever the pains and difficulties I would have encountered as the child of a young, unmarried mother, I wish I had lived in spite of all that. Had I been born, there would be more to experience than just suffering and doing without. I would have received the joys and blessings living my life would have brought. Dying before I was born was in no way a benefit for me. To tell the truth, it is a curse in numberless ways.” He glanced at his mother. “So forgiving you didn’t come about without a struggle on my part — in no way was it an easy thing for me to do. But it helped that I knew that you were immediately sorry for what was done to me. That’s why you saw me that day at the abortion clinic. I turned back for a moment before going to God when I saw your grief. I could see that you felt concern for me, regretted what you had done, even while you doubted God could ever forgive you.”
Kit took Mia’s hand. “Forgiving isn’t easy, not for anyone. But having seen the face of God, I will do everything I can to mirror what he does, reflect his character if I can. It is a choice I am happy to make, to agree with him that you are forgiven. I would prefer —. I dearly wanted a chance to live my life, but I know God has blessed me in my situation as it is. He absolutely cares for me, has a plan for me even though I was never born. Even if no one else will ever see me in this way, I am a whole, completed person in his sight. It comforts me that he doesn’t see me in terms of what I was denied. In fact, he told me how much he honors my sacrifice, the sacrifice of accepting with grace the injustice done to me, and he counts what I was forced to endure as a voluntary sacrifice even though I had no say in what was done to me. God counts it as surrendering my life since I am willing to give him thanks in the middle of that suffering. And I am rewarded for that surrender. Did you know he would do that?”
Eyes filling with tears, Mia shook her head no.
Kit said, “So I am content to forgive you because it pleases my Father God. He forgives you, and that’s why I do as well. However, meeting you was something different. That was entirely up to me. My decision, my choice. In no way was there any obligation for me to request to meet you. Our meeting was my choice, my decision. It wasn’t something that I owed to you. We met because I asked, because I wanted to get to know you. As one of the clouds of witnesses who has watched over you, I knew you loved me in spite of what you had done. So I was willing to run the risk of being rejected.”
Mia stopped walking to hug him. “Which is what it looked like I was doing when I ran away at first. I’m so sorry for causing you to feel rejected, even for a short time!” Then she looked intently into his face and asked, “What about Jack, your father? Do you wish to meet him as well?”
Kit started walking again down the path along the river. “The way things stand now, I will not be making a request to meet my father. He still congratulates himself for avoiding responsibility for the three children he fathered, happy that his parents pressured abortions from the young women he compromised — three children killed so he could pastor a church. These people who pretend they were never my family think they have escaped the consequences of what they have done. But unless they turn back and repent, they will all stand condemned before God for the evil they thought was done in secret.”
He shook his head. “There are many who have chosen to become the parent of a dead baby who will never meet their son or daughter. No child who was aborted would desire to encounter a parent with a heart that still contains murderous intent toward them or who has no sense of shame and guilt or who feels only indifference. And we are aware of our parent’s heart, whether they repent of their sin against us or not. To know they change their mind, come to regret our absence, even years later — what a difference that would make. But either way, we don’t lack for a parent’s love. We dwell with God, and there is no one closer to him than we are.”
After walking for a while without talking, Kit paused then stopped to face Mia. “Now I have a question for you. What would you like me to call you? Because of what happened, we skipped over the events that would have defined this in a more natural way. So far nothing, no name I have thought about saying to you feels natural enough to actually speak it out loud. I need your help figuring this out. I’d like to know what you would like to hear.”
Mia stopped walking as well. What did she want him to call her? “Oh, Kit! I would like to find the right name too! For both of us. You are right — it’s not an easy thing to figure out. Here in Ismarsettehka, there
is an equality between us. Obviously, we’re not infant and adult. So even though I am your mother, Mom or even Mother doesn’t seem like the right thing, and using my name, calling me Mia seems too disconnected. Let me think a minute.”
Out of the blue, a memory from Mia’s past floated up into her consciousness. “How about this! I remember something about my Polish great-grandmother, the name she used when she spoke about her mother. It always seemed like a special and beautiful name to my little girl sensibilities. She called her mother Maminka. How does that sound as a name for you to use with me?”
Kit thought for a moment. “I agree that Mom wouldn’t suit our relationship. Or Mia. Maminka — hmm. I like that. Especially since it has family history connected to it that I can connect to now.” He gave Mia a strong hug and kissed her forehead. “Thank you, Maminka. This is a good idea. I’ll call you Maminka from now on.”
Then he laughed. “This is such a relief, Maminka.”
Mia asked, “Why?”
“I was pretty worried that you’d want to be called Mama Mia!” He smiled and said, “I don’t think I could have done that. Not without laughing anyway.”
Mia laughed and gave his shoulder a little shove. “Oh you! That’s too funny. And horrible! Mama Mia!” She laughed again. “Can I change my mind now?”
“No!” Kit laughed.
Mia said, “Don’t think I am not acquainted with the many downsides of my name!”
Kit said, “Tell me about it!” And they both laughed together.
In spite of the laughter, this had been a difficult conversation for both Kit and Mia. It is one thing to make a decision as if what happens will fall on you alone. But to listen to your never-born son who never had a say before the abortion, to hear him tell you he wished he had had a chance to live his life. Even if you theoretically believe an unborn baby is a person, hearing “Not having my life to live is a curse,” from the baby denied his time on Earth was heart-breaking. Hearing what Kit said ended all debates for Mia. Such selfishness to say it’s best to seek perfect timing and circumstances, opting for a life free from trouble and inconvenience for yourself, never considering the impact your choice has on the life of the other person involved. His life was as important as hers, in every consideration.
There was another way that Kit’s perspective on wanting to live the life God had given him made an impact on Mia. Now that she’d heard his side of everything, for her it put a final stake into the heart of the transhumanist notion that people deserve the right to do whatever they want just because it’s what they want. She thought, “I never realized how many similarities there are between Humanity+ and ‘wanted and convenient pregnancy’ thinking. Both justify their choice by citing a desire to escape from struggles and pain in their life. Both offer indifference and condemnation for the person, the human being created in the image and likeness of God who made up the other half of their choice. ‘I’ll get what I want, too bad for you.’ No thought for the consequences for anyone else.”
Mia recalled all the speakers at the conference she had attended who had said unenhanced humans would be considered as less than human, de-classified and lowered in status. No longer a human being of infinite worth because they were created by God to be his child, they’d be considered the equal to an animal like a dog or a dolphin or even something lower like an insect. And it would be OK to step on, cage in a livestock pen for later disposal, starve through neglect, or whatever euphemism you’d prefer to drape over the murder of a person who would have no value because “they aren’t one of us” when compared to elevated and enhanced, beyond-human Humanity+ people. How could H+ go from wanting to escape their own pain, illness, and death to thoughtlessly and callously talking about the extermination or unavoidable death of the people who thought differently and wanted no part of Transhumanism? Mia thought, “Enoch is right. Choosing loyalty to your own side, and not God’s side, does eventually turn everything into evil.”
35 | Fair
As time passed, Ismarsettehka became a well-loved and precious home to Mia. The majority of her time at Enoch’s home was spent at the relaxed pace of an enjoyable life from an earlier era. Taking her turn doing different chores, Mia made friends with the dogs, cats, and the other animals who lived there and learned how to tend and care for the geese, chickens, cows, sheep, goats, and rabbits from Daisy Gowan. The red-headed young woman with gray eyes had a special talent for understanding the animals who couldn’t speak for themselves. Daisy’s real name was Isla Gowan, but once Dr. Adjani found out that Gowan meant daisy, he started calling her “Daisy, Daisy” and usually sang the beginning of the song to her, sometimes throwing in “Give me an answer, do.” Her reply to this was to smile and say, “Yes, you are half crazy! One daisy is plenty, thank you. I don’t need a whole bouquet.” Everyone else started using the nickname as well, since the flower named after the sun (daisy, the day’s eye) suited her sunny disposition.
Learning about horses from Enoch or Ethan was what Mia liked to do best, never tiring of getting tips on training or caring for them. Every day when Enoch was home, she would ride out alone on Maru-Dannum for a run across the tall grass prairie. She would give the tall, cherry red horse his head and let him choose his own pace and the path they would take. Sometimes they trailed the herd of buffalo grazing on the rolling hills. Most of the time he would start running full out across the rolling hills, under the warm sun and impossibly blue skies, sometimes scaring up birds or startling coyotes out of their way. As they dashed across the open country, it was like she was part of a long ago fable where horses could fly or people wore boots that let them travel seven leagues with each step. She felt like she understood what Maru communicated and he certainly understood what she said or even thought. Later on in the day, he would set a slower pace, wander here and there, exploring. One time they stopped by the river near the forest’s edge to eat lunch, and Maru killed a snake that was hiding under a tree before it could strike at her. When Mia reported later what had happened, Joseph said, “Praise God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit for Maru! That type of snake is poisonous, and its bite deadly. He saved you from mortal danger, Mia.”
Having grown up spending lots of time outdoors hunting with his father and grandfather, Joseph Freeland knew about wildlife in the forest and on the prairies, how to identify birds from their songs, where to catch a glimpse of twin fox cubs playing outside their den. Mia asked him to teach her how to make a fire without matches, how to fish and then cook what they caught, to identify what plants growing wild were good for medicine or for food, how to promote the growth of these plants in their place in the forest or grassland. In turn, he was very interested to hear about Mia’s time on Mount Graham, what she had seen there. He told her that the mountain was sacred to all First Nations, how they had sued to prevent the Vatican and others from building the observatories on the summit, but had been unsuccessful in their attempt. “Those petroglyphs you saw there, they depict the history of what actually happened when giants came through the stargates. To have survived such an encounter yourself, you were protected by God, Mia. Many others were not so fortunate in their dealings with these evil monsters!”
Preston told her how Joseph had prayed for him when he first came to Ismarsettehka immediately after encountering the giant in Afghanistan who had killed and eaten the rest of the men in his squad. “He took one look at me and said, ‘You’ve seen a giant!’ This was right after Enoch brought me back from the cave, and he had not heard from anyone what happened to me. But a true warrior in spiritual warfare, somehow Joseph knew without being told. He laid his hand on my forehead and sang a prayer from Psalms over me, asking the Holy Spirit to heal the damage done by the giant to my spirit. After he prayed, the black cloud did lift off my heart. He still prays with me on a regular basis — I don’t have to ask. On days when the memories of the giant are pressing in on me and the black cloud returns, he can tell
and he asks to pray with me.”
Mia learned later that Preston and Joseph had built a sweat lodge together, and Pastor Robinson had offered a benediction on the day when it was ready for everyone to use. In his remarks at the dedication, JT said, “Billy Graham once prophesied that the original Americans were a sleeping giant, that they could become the evangelists who will help win America for Christ. We’re blessed to have Joseph Freeland with us here, providing us with the benefit of his spiritual gifts. As one of the people who have suffered a great hurt, he now knows how to love the most.”
Everyone at Ismarsettehka had something to contribute, their work and talents a benefit for themselves and for everyone else. James Huse and his wife April were both artistic and creative. He was a skilled woodworker who made beautiful furniture, musical instruments like harps and guitars as well. She had a talent for drawing and painting and also had a beautiful singing voice. Daisy did weaving on a loom James had built, Mother Tallis was a skillful seamstress and tailor, Sofia was an outstanding tracker and brought back many wild animals for dinner that she hunted in the woods, and Dr. Adjani had a talent for carving. He had carved all the horn bugles that the rangers used to announce arrivals. Making small statues, bowls, utensils, and other things needed around the house gave him great pleasure. Also, he was in charge of the orchards and grew many varieties of apples. Every fall he made apple cider with some of the cider saved for making a wonderful applejack (freeze distilled outdoors) that was shared on special occasions. There was a friendly competition going between him and Pastor JT (who made beer, wine, and sourdough bread) over who had created the best libation. Joseph Freeland served as headmaster of the school for the children at Ismarsettehka. Most of the adults helped with teaching, coming to the classroom to share their expertise and experiences with the students from time to time. Mia taught several times and loved getting to know the children. Most weeks, Pastor JT taught the sermon at the church services, with Enoch also speaking from time to time when he was back home. Preston led the singing with his clear tenor voice and everyone followed his example, singing with enthusiasm. He also sang joyful solos that he had composed himself.
No Geek Rapture for Me_I'm Old School Page 44