Callum’s face remains impassive. He even manages a small smile. “What did she say?”
“She said, no.”
Callum keeps the smile plastered to his face. “Marina she has a new job, her Dad is sick, she has a lot going on.” He almost pleads for Marina to believe him.
“Bullshit Callum. She said Jessie is younger than me and I shouldn’t hang out with seventh graders. That is bullshit, right?”
Marina holds onto his arm like he is her only means to safety after falling into the center of the ocean, begging him to be honest with her. She unzips the backpack and takes out a white piece of paper. She unfolds it slowly and hands the paper to Callum. It is a photo, just a headshot, of two smiling girls, side by side on the front porch. He stares silently, holding the paper in one hand.
“She wouldn’t even talk to Jessie’s Dad last night. She was really weird.” Her voice falters under the weight of her words. Callum just shakes his head, but he doesn’t deny it. “And then George faking all that?”
Callum watches the water fall and avoids her stare.
“Callum, please.”
He shakes his head slowly. “I can’t. It has to be your mom,” he says.
“She’ll lie.” Marina knows she will.
“Maybe you should let her,” Callum says, finally meeting her eyes. “If your mother is so sure she needs to lie to you, maybe you should trust her that the lie is best for you.”
“Lying is never a solution. That is what she says all the time. Lying is never a solution. Stand up and deal with your life. Lying is never a solution.” She repeats for the third time.
Callum does nothing more than watch the water mercilessly beating the falls.
“You know everything don’t you, Callum?” she asks.
“I don’t know which way is up sometimes, darling,” he says.
“Will you tell me just one thing? Answer yes or no and then I’ll leave it alone. I promise I’ll leave it alone. Just one question Callum?”
He takes a deep breath before answering. He smiles a charming smile at her. She nearly killed him just a few months ago, and somehow he has become one of the most important people in her life, in her heart. She wishes he was her father. She knows he feels the same way.
“One question, Callum?” she repeats and waits for his answer.
“No,” he says finally, then grabs her backpack and walks back to the stairs to climb out of this place.
She stares at his back as he takes the steps two at a time. She waits a minute and considers not following. She can run into the woods and lose herself for as long as she wants. Let him chase her and call her name, worrying all damn day. Let him tell her mom that he lost her only daughter in the wilderness. She knows she’ll never learn what she needs if she runs away, not yet anyway. Finally she gets off the stone and meets him at the top of the stairs.
He is sitting on a bench waiting for her. His elbows are on his knees and he rests his forehead in his hands.
“Ask it Marina,” he says finally, not moving.
“Is Jessie my sister?” She holds her breath and waits for the answer even though she knows it already.
He nods the slightest nod and her whole world changes.
They ride back in near silence. The conversation is over. Marina, true to her word, asks no more questions. My god she is unbelievable. Callum would be asking a thousand and one questions if he was in her shoes. When he stops in the driveway, they sit a moment staring at the house. Victoria isn’t home yet.
“Thanks,” Marina says, before heading inside.
Callum opens the window and calls out to her. “Marina, I’m going to run an errand or two. I’ll pick something up and we can cook a special dinner tonight. I’ll be back in a bit. Alright?” She looks at him like she knows he is lying. She nods anyway, waves and goes into the house.
The drive to Christopher’s house is short. Within ten minutes, Callum is walking Christopher’s front steps. Before he can knock, a lovely woman, the same woman Victoria described, opens the door with a surprised, “Oh. Hi. Can I help you?” She has an easy smile and she reminds Callum a little of Victoria.
“I’m Callum. Is Christopher at home?”
She gives him the once over. “He is. Can I ask, are you from England?”
“I am. London.”
“You may know a friend of mine. Victoria? She mentioned she had a friend from England and she described you to a tee.” Suddenly the door opens wider and Jessie and her little brother face Callum. Jessie greets Callum by name.
“You two know each other?” Grace asks Jessie.
“Yeah, he and Daddy are friends. His daughter goes to my school.”
Callum doesn’t clarify his relationship with Marina and he clears his throat to speed things along since he doesn’t want to talk to Grace anymore. He pulls his eyebrows together to give his face a little more seriousness and it only makes him more intriguing to look at.
“Christopher?” he asks when she doesn’t move.
“Sure, sorry. We are just heading out. He’s around back. You want me to call him to the door or you can just go on around?”
He opts to go around. Christopher rides on the mower, driving in straight lines across the lawn. The lawn is well manicured and heavily landscaped. At least ten different flowering plants Callum can’t name are in bloom without a weed in sight. Christopher wears a tee shirt and shorts, headphones atop his head. He looks like the perfect suburban dad on a Saturday afternoon. His secrets are safe. Callum doesn’t call for him even when Grace’s car is clear of the house.
Now that Callum is here, he isn’t even sure why he came. He just knows he needs to do something. He needs to do something for Marina and Victoria. Something. Anything. Callum walks quickly across the yard with long strides and great purpose. When Christopher sees him, he waves, happy to see his friend. He turns off the mower and takes off his headphones. Callum walks up behind Christopher, wraps his arms around Christopher’s neck and pulls him over the back of the seat, slamming him onto the ground, hard.
“What the fuck?” Christopher tries to yell with the wind knocked out of his lungs.
Callum outweighs Christopher by at least fifty pounds and he has maybe four inches on him. He also has the element of shock working for him and years of wrestling experience. Christopher wrestled too so Callum goes for his dick, pinning Christopher down, forcing his legs apart. Callum presses the full force of his weight between Christopher’s legs by pushing his hip into Christopher’s dick as hard as he can. The potential and imminent pain freezes Christopher and Callum holds his hands together above his head. Christopher doesn’t resist. He is Callum’s bitch.
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Callum whispers into Christopher’s ear. “You know you want it.”
Callum knows he has Christopher’s full attention so he puts his hand up Christopher’s shirt, groping him like he would a woman, pinching his nipples hard for good measure.
“Oh baby you feel so good,” Callum whispers into Christopher’s neck. Callum takes his hand out of Christopher’s shirt and uses it to slide down Christopher’s shorts, cupping his ass, baring his pubes. Christopher is panting, red in the face. His eyes are wet. Callum keeps his hip in place tight.
“What the fuck?” Christopher asks again.
“You want to scream. Go ahead. Call the neighbors right over. I just might ass fuck you before I’m done. I’m liking this a lot.” Callum forces his hip deeper into Christopher’s dick. He gasps in pain and Callum starts thrusting and moving his hips in circles, dry humping Christopher’s groin.
“Mmm, nice. I actually think I could come like this. Fascinating and good to know in case I ever go to prison. I’ll probably end up in prison eventually.”
“Callum?” Christopher asks. “Why?”
“Victoria, that’s why.” Callum says and then notices her watching everything from the gate. “I’ll tell you what Christopher. I won’t come on you, if we can have five minutes of honest conv
ersation. If you bullshit me I will consider raping you. I’ve never considered myself gay, but these lines can blur, can’t they. And rape isn’t about sex, it is really just about power. I’m not above it.”
“Anything Callum, just get the fuck off me,” Christopher begs.
Callum stands up and Christopher pulls his shorts up. Christopher looks weak and scared and Callum thinks that it must be horrible to be a woman. The ease with which Callum can overpower another individual is a little frightening. Being vulnerable to that all the time must be terrifying. Callum offers his hand. Christopher hesitates, takes it and Callum pulls him to his feet on unsteady legs. As soon as they are both upright, Christopher sees Victoria standing at the gate watching their every move.
“Callum?” she asks, looking Christopher over. His face is splotched with red and covered in shame.
“Be quiet Victoria,” he says, taking her hand and standing between the two of them. “I didn’t mean for you to see that. Don’t even talk to him.”
“What are you doing here Callum?” she asks bewildered.
“I’m not sure what I’m doing here. I’m trying not to kill him,” Callum admits.
Victoria says nothing and seems to be processing an awful lot of information.
“Do you have anything to drink Christopher?” Callum talks like he wasn’t just grinding his buddy. “I’m suddenly quite thirsty.”
Christopher is silent and stares at Victoria then at Callum. The light of understanding slowly comes into his eyes.
“You two are together?” he asks.
“We are together,” Callum says, even though he isn’t entirely sure Victoria would agree. She doesn’t disagree which is a good sign. “I think you owe Victoria some honesty. If you lie, I’ll rape you right here for Victoria to watch. I think she’d be alright with it, wouldn’t you Vic?” He has never called her Vic before, but it feels right.
Victoria shrugs, wordless and noncommittal.
“Can we at least be civilized? I’ll help myself to three beers from your fridge. Let’s sit at the table.” Callum walks into the house, takes three beers and shuffles through the kitchen drawers to find an opener. He finds it on the first try. Callum understands kitchens. When he goes back outside, Victoria and Christopher are sitting at a black wrought iron table. Obviously no words have passed between them. Callum hands each a beer and draws long on his own. Being an asshole is hard work. He is exhausted and outrageously horny.
“Speak,” Callum says.
“What do you want me to say?” Christopher asks.
“Hold on. Victoria, what are you doing here?” Callum asks. He was so wrapped up in the heat of the moment, he almost forgot that she didn’t come with him.
She shakes her head and doesn’t answer.
“Are you not sure why you are here?” Callum asks.
“I needed to do something,” she says finally. “Anything. It is time. You were right, at least about that.”
“Does this mean you have had a change of heart?” Callum asks with his eyes on Victoria.
Victoria shrugs again with her eyes on Christopher.
“Christopher. I think you should just talk. Maybe start with the last time you saw Victoria.”
Christopher leans back in his chair and closes his eyes. He takes a few moments, but eventually he speaks slowly and quietly.
“That night. I was too rough with you Victoria. I have regretted that for a long time.”
“Too rough.” she repeats. “You were too rough? I don’t understand exactly what you mean by too rough.”
Christopher shakes his head silently.
“You’re going to need to say it Christopher,” Callum demands. “Honesty please.”
“Victoria, I have a wife and kids. I am different now. I was drinking then but I haven’t had a drink in over twelve years. That night with you seems like a million years ago,” he pleads.
“It was fourteen years ago and it seems like yesterday to me,” she says.
“This will ruin my kids,” he pleads.
“What about your wife? What about Grace. How is she going to react when she finds out what she is married to?” Victoria seethes at him.
Christopher sets down his beer and speaks more to Callum than Victoria. “She and I have had tough times, but we are good now. Let us be good, please.”
“Look at me Christopher. Say it or I will beat your head in with that shovel.” Victoria nods to the garden where a shovel indeed stands tall and ready, half stuck into the dirt.
Christopher holds a hand over his mouth, keeping the words in. Finally he moves his hand away and sets the truth free. “I raped you Victoria. I wasn’t rough with you, I raped you. And I have been sorry for it every day of my life.”
Victoria stands up and walks across the yard to the gate. She looks back once and then goes through, carefully latching it behind her. Callum follows Victoria out, but she is already gone when he reaches the driveway.
Callum drives into the city. He knows where Victoria is headed. He parks illegally in front of Grace’s shop and is glad to see it is closed. He leans against the bumper waiting and Victoria walks around the corner within minutes. She never parks illegally. She took the time to park in a garage down the street.
Victoria ignores Callum and pulls the handle of Grace’s shop, ignoring the closed sign. The locked door shakes under her force. Callum simply walks up behind her and wraps his arms around her. She leans into him, letting herself fall into his embrace.
“I am a moron. You were one hundred percent right. I am an idiot as well. Everything you said was true.” He whispers into her hair. “I need to tell you one more thing before I turn you around. You’ll have one more chance to hate me today. If you can’t love me, I’ll have to bear it, but I will be honest with you.” He doesn’t wait for her to answer. “Marina asked me if Jessie is her sister. I did not deny it. I couldn’t lie to her Victoria. I love her too.” He can feel her shoulders go and the sobs comes out of her.
“It’s over, isn’t it Callum?” She cries, turning around and leaning into his chest. “It is all over.”
He lets her cry and holds her hard. “No Victoria. It is all just beginning.” And he is sure it is true.
They leave Victoria’s car in the garage and drive back to the house in Callum’s.
“I should call Marina,” she says reaching into her handbag. “I have to figure out what to tell her, Callum. Where is my phone?” Victoria asks.
“Did you leave it in your car? You need it? Mine’s here.” Callum reaches into his pocket, but it isn’t there. “I must have dropped it.”
“When you were attacking Christopher?” She smiles but just at the corners of her mouth. “And thanks for that by the way.” She unbuckles and slides closer to him on the seat. “I needed that.”
“What will I tell her Callum,” she asks. “If this was Anna? What would you do?”
He has given this a lot of thought. He has had months to figure out a way to incorporate Christopher and his family into their lives.
“Victoria, I know you don’t want to believe this. But he is a changed man. In my heart I think you can have him in your life. In time you may come to trust him as I have. This is not me being an idiot or a moron.”
“I’m sorry about all that, Callum.”
He smirks but forgives her. “At the same time, I don’t think Marina can know about the rape. It could destroy her. And if Marina can’t know it, you inadvertently have to protect Christopher and his wife and his kids and lie. You have to leave it in the past, Victoria, and forge a new future.”
And there it is. Callum has laid out the path forward and the path forward begins with sweeping her rape under the rug. Denying the rape. Letting the rape go. Why is she letting her rapist get away with it? Why does she let him get a big house and happy marriage, kids and soccer games and dance recitals and lawnmowers? Why? The answer is simple. For Marina.
“What on earth?” Callum pulls into the driveway and puts
the car into park.
George and Christopher are standing on the porch speaking heatedly.
Callum runs to the stairs, “Christopher, what the hell are you doing here? George are you okay?” Callum demands, stepping between them.
“I’m fine, I’m fine. I have been trying to reach you both. Why aren’t you answering?”
Christopher throws Callum his phone. “I think you left this at my house. When we were having that beer.”
“Thanks so much. Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to put you out.” Callum says, noticing fourteen missed calls from George.
“Marina ran off,” George says in a panic. “First, she tore apart Victoria’s room.”
“What?” Callum says looking up the stairs to see papers and photos strewn across the hallway.
“Jessie’s gone too.” Christopher adds. “Grace was supposed to pick her up after dance class, but they said she never showed up. Grace dropped her off and she never went in. I saw George calling over and over and I answered.”
Victoria doesn’t say a word. She just gets back into the car.
Callum follows her. “George, Victoria left her phone in her car downtown. We’ll go back for it and see if Marina called.”
When they get to Victoria’s car, there are no calls from Marina. Victoria wipes her eyes with the back of her hand. “Where the hell is she, Callum?”
Callum answers quickly. He thinks he knows. “Did you ever see The Parent Trap?” he asks out of nowhere. “The two sisters who find each other at a camp and go stay in a cabin together, just the two of them.
She nods and says, “Call Christopher.”
They arrive at the local camp within twenty minutes. It is closed and the gates are locked so they park outside and go in on foot. Fresh bike tracks line the mud.
“All of the local kids come here in the summer. First graders go for an overnighter. Scouts come here and older kids do longer stays. Victoria will do a week at the end of ninth grade. It is a rite of passage. Kids get survival training, learn to hunt and most of us smoked our first cigarettes here.” Victoria easily opens the chain link fence blocking their way onto a boarded footpath surrounding the cabins.
Forever Falling Page 20