by L. J. Smith
“Look, Matt—”
“Go on,” he said, still staring at Damon.
Meredith wouldn’t have let herself be ordered around this way. And Elena certainly wouldn’t. Bonnie opened her mouth to tell Matt to go sit in the car himself when she suddenly realized something.
This was the first time in months she’d seen Matt really care about anything. The light was back in those blue eyes—that cold flash of righteous anger that used to make even Tyler Smallwood back down. Matt was alive right now, and full of energy. He was himself again.
Bonnie bit her lip. For a moment she struggled with her pride. Then she conquered it and lowered her eyes.
“Thanks for rescuing me,” she murmured, and left the yard.
Matt was so angry he didn’t dare move closer to Damon for fear he might take a swing at him. And the chilling darkness in Damon’s eyes told him that wouldn’t be a very good idea.
But Damon’s voice was smooth, almost dispassionate. “My taste for blood isn’t just a whim, you know. It’s a necessity you’re interfering with here. I’m only doing what I have to.”
This callous indifference was too much for Matt. They think of us as food, he remembered. They’re the hunters, we’re the prey. And he had his claws in Bonnie, Bonnie who couldn’t wrestle a kitten.
Contemptuously he said, “Why don’t you pick on somebody your own size, then?”
Damon smiled and the air went colder. “Like you?”
Matt just stared at him. He could feel muscles clench in his jaw. After a moment he said tightly, “You can try.”
“I can do more than try, Matt.” Damon took a single step toward him like a stalking panther. Involuntarily, Matt thought of jungle cats, of their powerful spring and their sharp, tearing teeth. He thought of what Tyler had looked like in the Quonset hut last year when Stefan was through with him. Red meat. Just red meat and blood.
“What was that history teacher’s name?” Damon was saying silkily. He seemed amused now, enjoying this. “Mr. Tanner, wasn’t it? I did more than try with him.”
“You’re a murderer.”
Damon nodded, unoffended, as if he’d just been introduced. “Of course, he stuck a knife in me. I wasn’t planning to drain him quite dry, but he annoyed me and I changed my mind. You’re annoying me now, Matt.”
Matt had his knees locked to keep from running. It was more than the catlike stalking grace, it was more than those unearthly black eyes fastened on his. There was something inside Damon that whispered terror to the human brain. Some menace that spoke directly to Matt’s blood, telling him to do anything to get away.
But he wouldn’t run. His conversation with Stefan was blurred in his mind rig ht now, but he knew one thing from it. Even if he died here, he wouldn’t run.
“Don’t be stupid,” Damon said, as if he’d heard every word of Matt’s thoughts. “You’ve never had blood taken from you by force, have you? It hurts, Matt. It hurts a lot.”
Elena, Matt remembered. That first time when she’d taken his blood he’d been scared, and the fear had been bad enough. But he’d been doing it of his own volition then. What would it be like when he was unwilling?
I will not run. I will not look away.
Aloud he said, still looking straight at Damon, “If you’re going to kill me, you’d better stop talking and do it. Because maybe you can make me die, but that’s all you can make me do.”
“You’re even stupider than my brother,” Damon said. With two steps he crossed the distance to Matt. He grabbed Matt by his T-shirt, one hand on either side of the throat. “I guess I’ll have to teach you the same way.”
Everything was frozen. Matt could smell his own fear, but he wouldn’t move. He couldn’t move now.
It didn’t matter. He hadn’t given in. If he died right now, he died knowing that.
Damon’s teeth were a white glitter in the dark. Sharp as carving knives. Matt could almost feel the razor bite of them before they touched him.
I will not surrender anything, he thought, and closed his eyes.
The shove took him completely off balance. He stumbled and fell backward, his eyes flying open. Damon had let go and pushed him away.
Expressionless, those black eyes looked down at him where he sat in the dirt.
“I’ll try to put this in a way you can understand,” Damon said. “You don’t want to mess with me, Matt. I am more dangerous than you can possibly imagine. Now get out of here. It’s my watch.”
Silently, Matt got up. He rubbed at his shirt where Damon’s hands had crumpled it. And then he left, but he didn’t run and he didn’t flinch from Damon’s eyes.
I won, he thought. I’m still alive, so I won.
And there had been a kind of grim respect in those black eyes in the end. It made Matt wonder about some things. It really did.
Bonnie and Meredith were sitting in the car when he got back. They both looked concerned.
“You were gone a long time,” Bonnie said. “Are you okay?”
Matt wished people would stop asking him that. “I’m fine,” he said, and then added, “Really.” After a moment’s thought he decided there was something else he should say. “Sorry if I yelled at you back there, Bonnie.”
“That’s all right,” Bonnie said coolly. Then, thawing, she said, “You really do look better, you know. More like your old self.”
“Yeah?” He rubbed at his crumpled T-shirt again, looking around. “Well, tangling with vampires is obviously a great warm-up exercise.”
“What’d you guys do? Lower your heads and run at each other from opposite sides of the yard?” asked Meredith.
“Something like that. He says he’s going to watch Vickie now.”
“Do you think we can trust him?” Meredith said soberly.
Matt considered. “As a matter of fact, I do. It’s weird, but I don’t think he’s going to hurt her. And if the killer comes along, I think he’s in for a surprise. Damon’s spoiling for a fight. We might as well go back to the library for Stefan.”
Stefan wasn’t visible outside the library, but when the car had cruised up and down the street once or twice he materialized out of the darkness. He had a thick book with him.
“Breaking and entering and grand theft, library book,” Meredith remarked. “I wonder what you get for that these days?”
“I borrowed it,” Stefan said, looking aggrieved. “That’s what libraries are for, right? And I copied what I needed out of the journal.”
“You mean you found it? You figured it out? Then you can tell us everything, like you promised,” Bonnie said. “Let’s go to the boardinghouse.”
Stefan looked slightly surprised when he heard that Damon had turned up and stationed himself at Vickie’s, but he made no comment. Matt didn’t tell him exactly how Damon had turned up, and he noticed Bonnie didn’t either.
“I’m almost positive about what’s going on in Fell’s Church. And I’ve got half the puzzle solved, anyway,” Stefan said once they were all settled in his room in the boardinghouse attic. “But there’s only one way to prove it, and only one way to solve the other half. I need help, but it isn’t something I’m going to ask lightly.” He was looking at Bonnie and Meredith as he said it.
They looked at each other, then back at him. “This guy killed one of our friends,” said Meredith. “And he’s driving another one crazy. If you need our help, you’ve got it.”
“Whatever it takes,” Bonnie added.
“It’s something dangerous, isn’t it?” Matt demanded. He couldn’t restrain himself. As if Bonnie hadn’t been through enough …
“It’s dangerous, yes. But it’s their fight too, you know.”
“Darn right it is,” said Bonnie. Meredith was obviously trying to repress a smile. Finally she had to turn away and grin.
“Matt’s back,” she said when Stefan asked her what the joke was.
“We missed you,” added Bonnie. Matt couldn’t understand why they were all smiling at him, and it made
him feel hot and uncomfortable. He went over to stand by the window.
“It is dangerous; I won’t try to kid you about that,” Stefan said to the girls. “But it’s the only chance. The whole thing’s a little complicated, and I’d better start at the beginning. We have to go back to the founding of Fell’s Church …”
He talked on late into the night.
Thursday, June 11, 7:00 a.m.
Dear Diary,
I couldn’t write last night, because I got in too late. Mom was upset again. She’d have been hysterical if she’d known what I was actually doing. Hanging out with vampires and planning something that may get me killed. That may get us all killed.
Stefan has a plan to trap the guy who murdered Sue. It reminds me of some of Elena’s plans—and that’s what worries me. They always sounded wonderful, but lots of the time they went wrong.
We talked about who gets the most dangerous job and decided it should be Meredith. Which is fine with me—I mean, she is stronger and more athletic, and she always keeps calm in emergencies. But it bugs me just a little that everybody was so quick about choosing her, especially Matt. I mean, it’s not like I’m totally incompetent. I know I’m not as smart as the others, and I’m certainly not as good at sports or as cool under pressure, but I’m not a total dweeb. I’m good for something.
Anyway, we’re going to do it after graduation. We’re all in on it except Damon, who’ll be watching Vickie. It’s strange, but we all trust him now. Even me. Despite what he did to me last night, I don’t think he’ll let Vickie get hurt.
I haven’t had any more dreams about Elena. I think if I do, I will go absolutely screaming berserk. Or never go to sleep again. I just can’t take any more of that.
All right. I’d better go. Hopefully, by Sunday we’ll have the mystery solved and the killer caught. I trust Stefan.
I just hope I can remember my part.
9
“… And so, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the class of ’92!”
Bonnie threw her cap into the air along with everyone else. We made it, she thought. Whatever happens tonight, Matt and Meredith and I made it to graduation. There had been times this last school year when she had seriously doubted they would.
Considering Sue’s death, Bonnie had expected the graduation ceremony to be listless or grim. Instead, there was a sort of frenzied excitement about it. As if everyone was celebrating being alive—before it was too late.
It turned into rowdiness as parents surged forward and the senior class of Robert E. Lee fragmented in all directions, whooping and acting up. Bonnie retrieved her cap and then looked up into her mother’s camera lens.
Act normal, that’s what’s important, she told herself. She caught a glimpse of Elena’s aunt Judith and Robert Maxwell, the man Aunt Judith had recently married, standing on the sidelines. Robert was holding Elena’s little sister, Margaret, by the hand. When they saw her, they smiled bravely, but she felt uncomfortable when they came her way.
“Oh, Miss Gilbert—I mean, Mrs. Maxwell—you shouldn’t have,” she said as Aunt Judith handed her a small bouquet of pink roses.
Aunt Judith smiled through the tears in her eyes. “This would have been a very special day for Elena,” she said. “I want it to be special for you and Meredith, too.”
“Oh, Aunt Judith.” Impulsively, Bonnie threw her arms around the older woman. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “You know how much.”
“We all miss her,” Aunt Judith said. Then she pulled back and smiled again and the three of them left. Bonnie turned from looking at them with a lump in her throat to look at the madly celebrating crowd.
There was Ray Hernandez, the boy she’d gone to Homecoming with, inviting everybody to a party at his house that night. There was Tyler’s friend Dick Carter, making a fool of himself as usual. Tyler was smiling brazenly as his father took picture after picture. Matt was listening, with an unimpressed look, to some football recruiter from James Mason University. Meredith was standing nearby, holding a bouquet of red roses and looking pensive.
Vickie wasn’t there. Her parents had kept her home, saying she was in no state to go out. Caroline wasn’t there either. She was staying in the apartment in Heron. Her mother had told Bonnie’s mother she had the flu, but Bonnie knew the truth. Caroline was scared.
And maybe she’s right, Bonnie thought, moving toward Meredith. Caroline may be the only one of us to make it through next week.
Look normal, act normal. She reached Meredith’s group. Meredith was wrapping the red-and-black tassel from her cap around the bouquet, twisting it between elegant, nervous fingers.
Bonnie threw a quick glance around. Good.
This was the place. And now was the time.
“Be careful with that; you’ll ruin it,” she said aloud.
Meredith’s look of thoughtful melancholy didn’t change. She went on staring at the tassel, kinking it up. “It doesn’t seem fair,” she said, “that we should get these and Elena shouldn’t. It’s wrong.”
“I know; it’s awful,” Bonnie said. But she kept her tone light. “I wish there was something we could do about it, but we can’t.”
“It’s all wrong,” Meredith went on, as if she hadn’t heard. “Here we are out in the sunlight, graduating, and there she is under that—stone.”
“I know, I know,” Bonnie said in a soothing tone. “Meredith, you’re getting yourself all upset. Why don’t you try to think about something else? Look, after you go out to dinner with your parents, do you want to go to Raymond’s party? Even if we’re not invited, we can crash it.”
“No!” Meredith said with startling vehemence. “I don’t want to go to any party. How can you even think of that, Bonnie? How can you be so shallow?”
“Well, we’ve got to do something.…”
“I’ll tell you what I’m doing. I’m going up to the cemetery after dinner. I’m going to put this on Elena’s grave. She’s the one who deserves it.”
Meredith’s knuckles were white as she shook the tassel in her hand.
“Meredith, don’t be an idiot. You can’t go up there, especially at night. That’s crazy. Matt would say the same thing.”
“Well, I’m not asking Matt. I’m not asking anybody. I’m going by myself.”
“You can’t. God, Meredith, I always thought you had some brains—”
“And I always thought you had some sensitivity. But obviously you don’t even want to think about Elena. Or is it just because you want her old boyfriend for yourself?”
Bonnie slapped her.
It was a good hard slap, with plenty of energy behind it. Meredith drew in a sharp breath, one hand to her reddening cheek. Everyone around them was staring.
“That’s it for you, Bonnie McCullough,” Meredith said after a moment, in a voice of deadly quiet. “I don’t ever want to speak to you again.” She turned on her heel and walked away.
“Never would be too soon for me!” Bonnie shouted at her retreating back.
Eyes were hastily averted as Bonnie looked around her. But there was no question that she and Meredith had been the center of attention for several minutes past. Bonnie bit the inside of her cheek to keep a straight face and walked over to Matt, who had lost the recruiter.
“How was that?” she murmured.
“Good.”
“Do you think the slap was too much? We didn’t really plan that; I was just sort of going with the moment. Maybe it was too obvious….”
“It was fine, just fine.” Matt was looking preoccupied. Not that dull, apathetic, turned-in look of the last few months, but distinctly abstracted.
“What is it? Something wrong with the plan?” Bonnie said.
“No, no. Listen, Bonnie, I’ve been thinking. You were the one to discover Mr. Tanner’s body in the Haunted House last Halloween, right?”
Bonnie was startled. She gave an involuntary shiver of distaste. “Well, I was the first one to know he was dead, really dead, instead of just playing his sc
ene. Why on earth do you want to talk about that now?”
“Because maybe you can answer this question. Could Mr. Tanner have got a knife in Damon?”
“What?”
“Well, could he?”
“I …” Bonnie blinked and frowned. Then she shrugged. “I suppose so. Sure. It was a druid sacrifice scene, remember, and the knife we used was a real knife. We talked about using a fake one, but since Mr. Tanner was going to be lying right there beside it, we figured it was safe enough. As a matter of fact …” Bonnie’s frown deepened. “I think when I found the body, the knife was in a different place from where we’d set it in the beginning. But then, some kid could have moved it. Matt, why are you asking?”
“Just something Damon said to me,” Matt said, staring off into the distance again. “I wondered if it could be the truth.”
“Oh.” Bonnie waited for him to say more, but he didn’t. “Well,” she said finally, “if it’s all cleared up, can you come back to Earth, please? And don’t you think you should maybe put your arm around me? Just to show you’re on my side and there’s no chance you’re going to show up at Elena’s grave tonight with Meredith?”
Matt snorted, but the faraway look disappeared from his eyes. For just a brief instant he put his arm around her and squeezed.
Déjà vu, Meredith thought as she stood at the gate to the cemetery. The problem was, she couldn’t remember exactly which of her previous experiences in the graveyard this night reminded her of. There had been so many.
In a way, it had all started here. It had been here that Elena had sworn not to rest until Stefan belonged to her. She’d made Bonnie and Meredith swear to help her, too—in blood. How suitable, Meredith thought now.
And it had been here that Tyler had assaulted Elena the night of the Homecoming dance. Stefan had come to the rescue, and that had been the beginning for them. This graveyard had seen a lot.
It had even seen the whole group of them file up the hill to the ruined church last December, looking for Katherine’s lair. Seven of them had gone down into the crypt: Meredith herself, Bonnie, Matt, and Elena, with Stefan, Damon, and Alaric. But only six of them had come out all right. When they took Elena out of there, it was to bury her.