by Dani Collins
But he hadn’t lashed out at her for that. She’d angered him, yes, but her real crime had been moving him in the first place. Sirena had dared to penetrate walls nobody else had dared breach.
Lust isn’t caring.
No, it wasn’t, but what he felt wasn’t mere lust.
* * *
Sirena was grateful that Raoul had left for the office before she rose. Of course, she was also hypocrite enough to miss him despite her chagrin over her revelation last night. There was also envy and disgruntlement that he still worked in one of the many dynamic, ever-changing offices she had loved so much. Who had taken her place? She hated her usurper on principle.
Chatting with Beatrisa, hearing stories of Raoul’s childhood became a nice distraction from her muddled emotions.
When he returned unexpectedly at lunch, it was with a surprise: tickets to a matinee. “Musicals aren’t my speed. I’ll stay with Lucy. You ladies have fun.”
It was an incredible treat, the sort of thing Sirena used to wish for every time they visited New York, but had never found time or funds for. Afterward they had tea and scones in a glitzy café until Raoul texted that his daughter had inherited his stubborn streak.
Giggling over his self-deprecating assessment, they rushed back so Sirena could feed their starving baby. Full of excitement about their afternoon, she was disappointed when Raoul said, “I’m glad you enjoyed it. Start dinner without me. I have a call to make.”
When he found his way to the table, he was wearing his cloak of remoteness. His mother didn’t pick up the signals of his distraction, but Sirena did. While Beatrisa talked about their day, the feeling of being left out of his world struck Sirena afresh, but she supposed his turning aloof was better than another clash like last night’s.
As Beatrisa wound down over coffee, Raoul finally said, “I’m afraid we’ve had a change of plans, Mother. We won’t be able to stay the week. The company has been nominated for an award in L.A. I have to fly out to pick it up.”
“You hate those things!” Sirena blurted. It had always been her job to figure out who could show up in his place, make the arrangements and prepare a speech.
“Surely you could do that without dragging Sirena and the baby across the country? They can stay here with me,” his mother said.
Sirena shrugged. Lucy was out of sorts enough with the time change from London. She didn’t need another one.
Raoul only gave his coffee cup a quarter turn and said, “They’ve specifically asked if Sirena would attend. It’s that bunch we worked with for the special-effects software,” he told her. “You always made an impression with my associates. You’ve been sorely missed by a lot of them.”
Sirena flushed hot and cold, not sure how to respond. She missed everything about her job, but she couldn’t go back to it, so she tried not to think of it.
As she considered all those beautiful women he’d taken to galas and cocktail parties, she also felt too inadequate to be his date. “I never attended that sort of thing with you before—” she started to dismiss.
“Things are different now, aren’t they?”
How? She lifted a swift glance and collided with his unrelenting stare, like he was pushing his will upon her. She instinctively bristled while the fault line in her chest gaped and widened. “There’s no one to watch Lucy.”
“Miranda’s agreed to fly in and sit with her.”
“You want to fly your stepsister to L.A. to babysit?” It was ludicrous—and the way he briefly glanced away, as though he wasn’t being honest with her, put her on guard.
“She flies all the time doing those trade shows. We’ll need to leave early, but we’ll come back here for a day or two on our way back to London.” He rose, putting an end to the discussion in a completely familiar way.
Old habits of accommodating his needs collided with the newer ones of taking care of her baby’s needs and her own. “Raoul.”
“This is important to me, Sirena. Please don’t argue.”
Wow. Had he just said please? Shock struck her dumb long enough he was able to escape without her raising another argument.
* * *
By morning, it was too late. When he said early, he meant early, coming into her room to begin packing Lucy’s things while shooing Sirena’s sleepy head into the shower. Being naked and knowing he was just beyond the door made her senses flare, but he was completely indifferent. They were on the plane within the hour.
Lucy didn’t enjoy the altitude climb, so they were well in the air before Sirena caught her breath. She gratefully embraced a cup of coffee while Raoul swept and tapped his way across a tablet screen.
“I liked that crew from the film, too, but I can’t believe you shook us out of bed for them. What’s really going on?” she asked.
“Use the stateroom if you want more sleep.” He didn’t even look up.
“No, I’ve had coffee now. You’ll have to entertain me,” she volleyed back.
His gaze came up with pupils so big his eyes were almost black. After a checking glance to their sleeping infant, he swung a loaded “Okay” to her.
In a blink, he’d transformed from the distracted man intent on his work that she’d seen a million times to a predatory male thinking of nothing but sex.
Her skin tightened and a flush of excitement flooded her with heat. Most betraying of all, tingles pooled in a swirl of sharp desire deep between her thighs.
His tense mouth eased into a smile of approval while he took a slow visual tour to her breasts, where her nipples stung with need. He didn’t move, but suddenly he felt very close. He knew exactly what was happening to her.
She yanked her gaze away, but the picture of his masculine beauty stayed with her. The man had a chest to absolutely die for and she ached to see it again, run her hands over his smooth shoulders and taut abs.
Embarrassed by her shortened breath and prickling arousal, she swallowed and said a strangled, “I think we’ve covered that. It’s not on.”
Silence. And when she risked a glance at him, his jaw was clenched.
“Because you think I don’t have feelings for you,” he growled.
“I don’t expect you to,” she stated stiffly, then had to dip her face to stare into her empty mug, hiding that she was going red with indignity. “Obviously you’ve been very decent, taking me in when I was sick, but that was more to do with Lucy, wasn’t it? And yesterday was nice, but it was a treat for your mother. Shows like that aren’t your thing, you said. So you sent me, which isn’t to say I didn’t enjoy it, just that I realize it wasn’t about me.”
“You have a stellar opinion of me and my motives, don’t you?”
“I’m not trying to insult you.”
“You’re doing a helluva job of it anyway. Let’s hope this trip redeems me in your eyes.” He went back to his tablet, shutting her out, which was probably a good thing.
He’d disconcerted her, sounding almost injured. A tiny worm of ambiguity niggled in her. Was she working so hard to protect herself she was failing to see the softer feelings she’d once been convinced were there? Or was that delusion a short trip to another painful tumble?
Despite the caffeine in her system, she wound up dozing and before she knew it, they were in California. They didn’t stay in the suite they’d used two years ago, when he’d been working with the special-effects company. This was a new, ultrachic building designed on a curve, like a giant glass-and-bronze half cylinder with its back to the ocean.
Inside the penthouse, the floor-to-ceiling windows were framed in gray-and-white geometric squares. The tiles and carpet marked severe paths through the open plan of lounge, kitchen and dining area. All of the furniture was angular and modern, but luxury softened the hard edges. Jewel-colored pillows and billowy curtains gave it a sexy, romantic feel and the stunning three-sixty views to mountains and ocean and cityscape were breathtaking. Sirena’s first thought was of the bath she’d take after dark, surrounded by the twinkling lights of the city.<
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As was her habit, she ran a brisk inventory as she explored, ensuring all the standard arrangements for Raoul were made.
“No Chivas and no cord for the secure internet connection.” She adjusted the drapes in the main room to let in more of the brilliant sunshine and view of the ocean. “I’ll call down. Did you want extra of that rain forest coffee you like to take home?”
He didn’t answer, so she turned to see him watching her with a bemused expression. “I would love that, thank you.”
His appreciation poured sunlight directly into her soul. A huge smile tried to take over her face and she had to turn away to hide how easily he flipped her inside out. What the hell was she doing? No way was she begging for a shred of affection. She needed to nip this craziness in the bud.
Fortunately their daughter woke and demanded attention, then a stylist showed up with a measuring tape and color swatches.
“What? Why?” Sirena argued as Raoul took the baby so she could lift her arms.
“We have that red carpet thing in a few nights,” he reminded.
“You didn’t say red carpet! I thought it was a cocktail party.” She hadn’t gained a ton of baby weight, she’d been too sick, but even though she’d started back on the treadmill, she was soft and had bags under her eyes. She’d never clean up like the stunners who usually hung off his arm.
Muddled and anxious, she got through the rest of the day and took some air on the balcony after her bath. A clean breeze off the water had swept away the pollution and the air smelled sultry, helping ease her unsettled mind.
Raoul joined her, making her stomach quiver in awareness. She ignored it.
“What do you think? Should I buy this unit?” he asked her.
“They’re treating you to entice you?” she guessed, then rejected the luxurious surroundings with a haughty shake of her head. “I came out here to see the fireworks over the happiest place on earth and I don’t, so it’s no good. A major disappointment.”
“I’ll make the purchase contingent on their moving the building to the next county,” he drawled.
“Ha!” She laughed at herself. “I guess I should look at a map. It’s just always been on my bucket list to come to L.A., visit the theme parks, wear the ears...I thought I’d at least see the castle and fireworks while I’m here.”
“You can. We’ll be here a week. Take—” He cut himself off.
“Lucy isn’t old enough to appreciate it,” she scoffed, predicting what he had almost said. “No, I can wait for another time.” To avoid his casually rumpled masculine appearance, she looked to the glowing blue of the pool jutting off to the right on their patio, a few steps down. It was surrounded by orange trees in oversized planter pots and twined with pinpoints of white lights. “If we come here again.”
She pursed her lips, wondering if this would become her life. She suspected so and took a second to self-examine.
“Honestly, Raoul? I don’t know if I would have enjoyed the travel half so much if we’d been staying at cheap motels and taking shuttle buses through dodgy back alleys. You live very well. It makes me very tempted to stay with you indefinitely.”
“That’s the only thing that tempts you?” he asked with mild disgust.
“Oh, please! You’re not that insecure.” She was glad it was dark and he couldn’t see how she took in his physique with a swift glance and a hard blush. “You could drive shuttle buses for back-alley hotels and still be appealing. But I’ve been in a relationship for practical reasons. They aren’t as great as they look. I knew from the outset I wouldn’t be with Stephan forever and it made me feel trapped. I don’t want to start something unless I know we can both live with it for a very long time.”
“I hate hearing you talk about him.” He gave her a pointed look that landed like a spear in her heart, sticking and vibrating. “This is the least practical or convenient relationship I’ve ever been in, but I still want it. I want you.”
“You mean you—”
“Don’t,” he interrupted, stepping so close she pressed back into the rail.
She gripped it, heart zooming into flight as his potent masculinity clouded around her like a spell. “Don’t what?”
“Don’t say I only want my daughter. I do, but that’s not why I’m out here. I saw you walk by with this robe clinging to your damp skin...” His nostrils flared as he seared his glance down her front. One hand came out to hook into her belt, tugging lightly.
She should have let him draw her forward, but she resisted and the belt gave way.
Something flared in his silver eyes.
“Raoul.” She meant it as a protest, but it was more an enticing whisper.
“Let me,” he growled, and with slow deliberation parted the edges of her robe. She was naked beneath and he swore softly before murmuring, “You’re so beautiful.”
She desperately needed to hear that. No one ever complimented her and seeing the way he ate up her figure was intensely gratifying, filling up a hollow part of her soul.
The cool night air made her skin pimple, knotting her nipples into tight buds and swirling to the warm places on her abdomen and thighs. A suffusion of heat followed, one incited by the hunger and admiration in his long study of her nude body.
“Raoul,” she moaned again, this time on a helpless whimper.
He groaned and stepped closer, shod feet bracketing her bare ones. His hot hands sought her waist and circled to her back, pulling her into contact with his clothed body.
She let her head fall back and met his open mouth with her own, moaning at how wrong this was, but she wanted it so badly. Her hands eased their death grip on the rail and rose to stroke over his shoulders, following the rippling flex of his shoulder blades as he swooped his hands over the small of her back, cupped her naked bottom and pressed her aching pelvis into firm contact with the ridge of his erection.
There was no buildup, no mental debate as she wondered if her desire would catch. Everything about this man turned her switches on. All he had to do was touch her. Her hips tilted, seeking more intimate contact with his hardness.
He thrust his tongue into her mouth in a bold claim, cupping the side of her face to hold her for his devastating kiss. She pulled him into her, wanting more, loving the stroke of his restless hands, the way he clasped her breast and gently crushed and massaged and softly bit her lips before he lifted his head.
“Bedroom,” he said, starting to pull her with him.
She came to her senses and pressed a hand to his chest. “We can’t.”
“Why not?”
For the life of her, she couldn’t think of anything but feeling him inside her, but that’s all it would be. Physical feelings. For him. As much as she wanted the release, she knew she’d never be able to keep it that dispassionate.
As he read her rejection, his expression shuttered. With a feral noise, he lurched away and grasped the rail to the lower balcony and vaulted to the pool deck below.
“What—?”
He landed between a pair of loungers, took three long strides and dove straight into the pool.
Sirena slapped a hand over her mouth, astonished as she watched his blurred image move with surprising speed down the length of the pool, all underwater. He was halfway back before he rose to gasp for air.
“What on earth are you doing?” she cried.
“What the hell are you doing?” he shot back, kicking himself to the far edge and hefting himself onto the ledge. Yanking at his wet shirt, he struggled out of it and dropped it beside his hip with a splat. “Get inside or I’m coming after you and this time I’m not stopping.”
She spun and ran to her room, where she hugged a pillow and told herself she’d made the right decision.
Even though it felt like the stupidest choice in the world.
* * *
“Sirena!”
It was about time. Odious man. First he made her so crazy she spent the night hating herself for not sleeping with him when she would have hated
herself more if she had. Then he left without writing a note, giving no indication of where he was going or when to expect him back—although he had prepared the coffee machine so all she had to do was push the button. But that didn’t excuse barging in here, yelling her name when she was trying to settle their daughter.
“Sirena, where—? Oh, here you are.”
She glared at him. “She was almost asleep.” She lightly bounced the baby to ease her drowsy eyes closed again.
“I’ll take her,” he said, moving forward in that battleship way of his.
“Fine, take her. Maybe she’ll sleep for you,” she muttered, grouchy because she needed a nap as badly as the baby. Maybe going to bed with him now....
Shut up, Sirena.
“I don’t want you to drop her,” he said, “when you see who I brought with me.”
She sidestepped to see a young woman in the doorway. She was blonde, slender, achingly sweet-looking in her innocent way, yet tall and curvy without a hint of the preadolescent she’d been the last time Sirena had seen her.
Allison’s soft brown eyes pooled with giant tears while a great, mischievous grin widened her mouth. She thrust out her arms. “Me,” she burst out. “Surprise!”
A scream built in Sirena’s throat and locked it, making pressure expand so hard her eyes filled. She choked, trying to gasp a breath, and began to shake. She wanted to move forward, but her knees started to sag.
Raoul caught her, swearing under his breath. “I should have warned you, but I didn’t want to build expectations if anything went wrong—”
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” she babbled, wanting to lean into him, but forcing her legs to take her weight. She passed through a thick mist that was pure sparkle and magic. As she reached the familiar yet very grown-up sister she hadn’t seen in the flesh for so long, she realized her cheeks hurt because she was smiling bigger than she ever had in her life.
“You don’t look this tall when we talk on my tablet,” she managed to joke even as a sobbing laugh rattled her voice. Her arms wrapped around her baby sister.