by Kristen Pike
“Well that’s no reason at all!” Cecily exclaimed in a matter of fact tone, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Why do you want me to do it so bad, Cecily?” Rowan demanded, an angry redness blotching her cheeks.
“I just-“ Cecily began, breaking off, looking at Rowan pleadingly.
“What? The honest truth Cecily.” Rowan coaxed softly, studying the younger girl.
“I just, I want you to make me happy.” She mumbled flatly, looking at her feet.
Rowan stared at her silently, watching the rise and fall of her chest, the paleness of her skin from being underground, the way her hair tumbled around her shoulders wildly. She deserves better, Rowan thought, not for the first time. “Okay.” Rowan said finally. “Okay.” She repeated when Cecily’s eyes shot up to look at her with a disbelieving look in them.
“Really?” Cecily asked her, bounding right up to the cage and gripping a bar between each fist. She smiled brightly, her eyes shining with excitement.
“Well I’ll do my best, I’ve never tried to change someone’s emotions before...” Rowan trailed off, suddenly self-conscious.
“That’s ok!” Cecily responded, sitting in the dirt, her knees pressed against the bars. Rowan sat down right in front of her, her heart racing. Cecily stared up at her expectantly.
Rowan hesitated, unsure of herself and how to proceed. “Cecily.” Rowan said softly, testing, looking deep into Cecily’s eyes. She felt something warm stir inside her and focused on it. It was like trying to follow a train of thought when you were falling asleep. “Cecily?” She asked and the younger girl nodded, her eyes wide and unblinking, almost dazed.
Rowan could feel it growing, whatever it was that gave her this power, and it made her squirm uncomfortably. It did not feel right to her, this beast that usually lay dormant, now springing to life in the pit of her stomach, radiating a warmth throughout her limbs. She felt itchy across her skin and had to stop herself from scratching at her flesh. “Cecily, can you lift your arm?” Rowan asked the girl, testing the bounds.
Cecily lifted her hand half-heartedly, still unblinking as if entranced, Rowan felt queasy and wanted to stop, to let the Beast grow cold and unused again inside her, but felt obligated to continue now that she had told Cecily she would.
“That’s good.” Rowan praised the girl, her voice quiet and mournful. Cecily nodded as if in agreement, her face blank. Rowans heart pounded in her chest and sweat beaded on her forehead. “You can lower your arm now Cecily.” Rowan told her and Cecily’s arm fell to the floor, landing limply with a thud.
Rowan reached through the cage, the metal bars searingly cold through her shirt as she grabbed Cecily’s hands through them. Cecily’s hands felt unusually warm and sweat pooled in her palms. “Now Cecily, I want you to focus,” Cecily nodded again, “I want you to think about the caves and I want you to release the hate you have for them. Feel the anger at being trapped ebb away from you, like the ocean tides.” Rowan said softly and Cecily exhaled, her body slumping slightly as if she had indeed been carrying a great weight that had just now flown from her like a bird taking flight. “That’s good,” Rowan said again, the corners of her vision blurring, she could hear her voice echo, as if hearing it from far away, “Now Cecily I want you to-“
“WHAT THE HELL!” Coop boomed, startling Rowan who fell backwards, releasing Cecily’s hand. The younger girl frowned, shaking her head as if to clear a fog. She looked at Coop then Rowan, a frown etching onto her face.
“Coop?” Cecily questioned, clambering to her feet. She extended an arm, as if to embrace him, shaking her head in explanation. “I didn’t-” She squeaked.
“You.” He said menacingly, pointing at Cecily, his voice a low growl, “get out, get to your room and stay there. Do not come out, no matter what.” He ordered.
“What are you going to do?” Cecily asked, looking like the frightened child she was next to Coop’s dominating person.
“Nothing of concern to you.” He responded. “Get to your room NOW!” He yelled again and Cecily flinched, though she stood her ground.
“No.” She stated bravely, though her voice shook.
“Cecily, it’s ok.” Rowan said quietly behind the young girl, fearing for her safety.
“It’s not.” Cecily said not looking at her, continuing her face off with Coop. Cecily breathed heavily and Rowan wondered if Coop could see the slight tremble of this tiny girl, the way Rowan could, or if he even cared at all. “Rowan is my friend and-“ Cecily started, but didn’t get to finish.
Rowan had forgotten how fast Coop could move, if he really wanted to. She only saw a blur and then the loud smack as his open palm met Cecily’s flesh. “Cecily!” Rowan cried, stepping forward, pressing her body against the cage wall as if she could catch Cecily as she stumbled.
Cecily fell to the floor, the skin on her cheek already turning red, like a blossoming flower under the mid day heat. She made a choking sound in the back of her throat, looking up at Coop with a hurt, betrayed look on her face. She gingerly touched her bruised cheek, wincing slightly.
“Cecily, get out.” Coop ordered once more, no remorse in his gruff voice. Cecily sat there a moment, before gathering herself and fleeing from the cave with a sob.
Coop turned to Rowan, malice and hatred gleaming in his eyes. Rowan shrunk away from him, bumping into Horace, who bah’d at her. “Think you could get her to let you go, do you?” He asked her, extracting the key to her cage from around his neck, where it had hung beneath his shirt on thin twine.
“No I was just-“ Rowan choked out, panic rising in her chest as she backed into the rocky, hard cave wall behind her, as far from Coop as she could get, but not nearly far enough.
“You think you’re so smart do you?” Coop barked, swinging the cage door open. It squealed in protest, stopping with a bang against the cage. “I told Kastor we should have just killed you!” Coop yelled, spittle flying from his mouth
Rowan shook her head vehemently, her hair flying about her face. Coop descended toward her. Rowan breathed in and out rapidly. Sweat dripped down her back. Her heart pounded violently in her chest.
Coop struck her hard with the back of his hand, much the same as he had Cecily, but with twice the force. Rowans head flung to the side and her body followed suit. Her cheek stung and her lip spouted blood that seeped onto her chin and down her shirt. Rowan tried to stand but as she crawled onto her hands and knees, Coop swung his foot up, catching her in the side with his heavy boot. Rowan coughed, blood sputtering on the ground beneath her. “Stop.” She gasped, raking air in and out of her lungs.
Rowan turned her head to the side. Coop drew his boot up for another kick but Rowan’s eyes locked onto his, his boot began to fall, “STOP!” Rowan yelled. Coop paused, his leg hanging awkwardly in the air. He looked confused, then outraged, his body quaking intensely as he tried to force his leg down.
Rowan staggered to her feet, her breathing haggard as she fished around in the hay for the crude knife she had made on a desperate night, her thoughts fleeting and scattered. She never took her eyes from Coop and when her hand finally grasped the hilt, she smiled madly.
She faced Coop full on and when he saw the knife, his eyes widened and he struggled harder against the invisible bonds that held him. “Cecily will never forgive you.” He told her gruffly, his voice laced with desperation.
Rowan stepped closer, having to tilt her head back to look him in the eyes. “I want you to take this dagger and shove it through your chest.” She told him, the Beast inside her purred, approving of her words, and stretching out into her limbs. Her head swam dizzily and Rowan smiled slightly, her lips hitched up in one corner. “It feels good.” Rowan said closing her eyes, swaying somewhat on her feet. This, she thought to herself, this was the power Elias had tried explaining to me. She felt strong, invincible even, and her eyes gleamed mischievously when she opened them.
Rowan passed Coop the knife. He shook his head even as he grabbed the blade an
d it pierced through his shirt, sliding into his flesh. Blood leached into his shirt, turning the fabric from a dull brown to a dark red then dripping onto the ground at his feet. “Deeper.” Rowan sighed, drunk with the feeling of power coursing through her veins. It was white-hot and ice cold all at the same time. Rowan did not, could not, think, her thoughts jumbled and all she heard, felt, was the Beast begging for more, its blood lust ignited and it consumed, devoured, held Rowan a slave to it’s whims.
Blood gushed from Coop’s lips as Rowans hand shot out, plunging the makeshift knife into his chest until it disappeared into him, his body absorbing the cutting metal. He gasped as he fell to his knees, his hands falling to his sides. Rowan kicked him over, his head thunking loudly off the floor. He stared up at her immobile, his eyes darting between hers accusingly.
Rowan heard shouting in the distance, panicked and angry. But the yelling fell deafly into the background of her mind as she stooped, resting on her haunches as she watched gleefully as Coop’s life blood leaked from him, spilling onto the ground and mingling into the dirt.
A long, piercing scream wailed somewhere in the expansive maze like cave but still Rowan lingered, unsatisfied until Coop’s eyes glazed over and with a last sputtering cough, he died. Rowan stood, pleased, and waltzed from the cage. Her head swam in a fog, thick and dark, her thoughts cramming together incoherently, unable to form concretely. Rowan’s Beast sighed with pleasure and Rowan smiled along with it, feeling as though she was floating high above her body and looking down at it from hundreds of feet above through red colored glass.
Rowan felt strong, so strong and this, THIS, is what Gods feel like, this surging of power pouring through her like lightning, making the world dull and vibrant at the same time, pulsing with energy. The Beast inside her purred stronger as she walked down the tunnel that led to her cage. Now that she had brought it to life, it refused to go back to its dormant state; it craved blood, the sickly sweet liquid fueling its fire, and Rowan felt more than willing to oblige. The days where she rolled over and just took the blows that life dealt her were over, she wouldn’t lay down and beg the world to stop beating on her, she had the strength, the power, the supremacy, because she could see it now, she WAS superior, to everyone, to everything, to beat it back into submission, to make it bow down to her, to worship her.
The path Rowan wound down was dark but she continued forward, confident that nothing would come leaping from the darkness at her, or that she wouldn’t lose her way.
Rowan turned down path after path, not sure, and not caring, where she ended up. She let her feet lead her toward the sounds of screaming and yelling, noticing them with mild disinterest.
The sound of metal on metal rang clear as Rowan strolled into a large room. Lanterns hung at intervals along the wall and Rowan could see rudimentary steps along the far wall, disappearing upward into the rock. What caught Rowans eye more though were the mass of people bashing together from all sides. Some wore what looked like soldiers uniforms, all black, with chainmail covering their chests; others wore simple clothes, basic shirts and pants.
Rowan spotted Kastor in the dense throng of men, towering a foot taller than any man, his long dark hair sticking to his head with sweat as he swung a huge broadsword, catching a uniformed man in the head. Blood gurgled from a massive wound in his side and Rowan could see exertion on Kastor’s face as he refused to die. Rowan paused, her thoughts growing muddled as she watched the young man Kastor had killed thump to the ground and continue to bleed from his wounds.
“Rowan!” She heard a voice call out, but couldn’t find the source. The voice sounded familiar and she started, but the Beast inside her roared up and drew her back into the fog that had settled over her. She walked into the group of fighting men, catching a glimpse of red hair through the swarm of men. “ROWAN!” The voice roared again, but Rowan could not concern herself with that now. She had to find Cecily and tell her that she could be free to walk in the sunshine whenever she pleased, that she wanted her to come with her when she left.
“Cecily!” Rowan laughed, spying the girl across the room, Rowan pushed through the mob toward her. She felt a stinging pain in her side but brushed it off. Why won’t these people move so I can get to Cecily? Rowan stormed in her head, the Beast stroking her frustration until she wanted to kill every last one of them.
When Rowan pushed through the clash of men, she found Cecily running around in hysterics, screaming a high-pitched wail. Her cheek was bruised, already a deep purple and tears streaked down her face, making her eyes red and puffy. Blood splattered the front of her shirt and Rowan couldn’t tell if it was hers, or someone else’s. Rowan halted, confused at the sight of Cecily with blood on her, that’s wrong.
There was something going on here, if only she could focus. The Beast tried to pull her back in but Rowan fought against it, it was like trying to come up from underwater but the current was to strong and it just kept pushing her back under. Confusion shuttered through Rowan as she took in the scene, supposedly for the first time.
Rowan turned, taking in the scene around her. Men were lost in battle, raising swords that clanged together, echoing off the walls and reverberating back at them. She heard grunting, and yelling, and the fevered shouts of men as they lay dying on the dirt floor. Where had all these people come from? Who were those soldiers? Was that Chev? She asked herself shocked but the person disappeared from view and Rowan thought it must have been a trick of her mind.
Rowans head snapped to Cecily as she heard the little girl scream. I have to get her out of here! Cecily was vaulting toward her, gone was the bounce from her step; Cecily ran with pure terror. Gone was the smile she always wore, replaced with a terrified grimace and large scared eyes. Rowan stepped toward her, a shout rising in her throat.
“CECILY!” Rowan screamed, her heart dropping into her stomach painfully. The younger girl’s mouth froze in an ‘O’, a scream blasting past her lips as a hand plucked her out of the air.
A massive man, more muscular even than Kastor, though not as tall and certainly not as hairy, wrapped his thick fingers around Cecily’s neck holding her off the ground. Cecily’s legs kicked wildly under her, her face turned red and then purple as the soldier squeezed the life from her. Rowan was still across the room, running as fast as she could through the angry mob, desperately clawing her way to Cecily.
Rowan lost sight of her as two men stumbled in front of her, both wearing chainmail, locked together in a battle of swords that would only end when the other was dead. Rowan ducked around them frantically, Cecily coming back into view. The massive man gripped his sword, drawing it back, and plunged it through Cecily’s stomach. Cecily looked down at the broad sword as it slid back out, blood streaming from the wound, darkening her shirt.
Everything tilted. It froze and it was quiet and Rowan blinked, the world shifting, darkening, Rowan gasped as her heart broke shattered crumbled and the world started, all in one second that lasted days months years millennia and a little girls life that was ending in one second, one exhale, one unthinkable moment that left Rowan breathless and
“CECILY!” Rowan screamed, her heart ripping in two. The man holding her dropped her to the ground where she lay crumpled, blood seeping out from her, mixing with the blood of others on the dirt floor. Rowan was three steps away, the man disappeared into the crowd. Two steps, Cecily coughed, blood spurting from her small lips and dribbling down her chin. One step.
“Cecily. Cecily no!” Rowan pleaded, pulling the younger girl into her arms. Her head lolled back, a small line of blood seeping from the corner of her mouth. “Cecily please, stay with me.” Rowan begged. Cecily tried to say something but only coughed, blood burbling in her throat. “Cecily!” Rowan gasped, tears stinging the backs of her eyes. “You can’t do this, Cecily, do you hear me?” Rowan yelled, trying to summon back the Beast, refusing to let her friend die, but it lay dormant, refusing to be of use now that she really needed it.
“Rowan you can’t he
lp her.” Someone said above her, trying to remove Cecily from her hands. Rowan smashed Cecily against her body, kicking at whoever was trying to take her.
“But I love her, I can save her. I CAN SAVE HER!” Rowan shouted, her voice catching in her throat as it seized with unshed tears.
“She’s gone Rowan. We have to go. Rowan, we have to go now!” Rowans tears blurred her vision, an aching throb pulsed in her head.
“Nononono, I can save her!” Rowan told the person, but she could see that Cecily was dying, her breath coming out in ragged puffs, could feel the limpness in her body. “But I love her,” Rowan sobbed weakly, unwilling to let the small body go. Rowan pushed Cecily’s flaming hair back from her face, stroking her bruised cheek.
“Rowan! Please!” The voice pleaded urgently, grabbing her under the shoulder and trying to hoist her to her feet.
“But who will feed Horace?” Rowan countered, refusing to let go of the young girl. “Cecily, you have to feed Horace, he will starve without you!” Rowan stammered out, Cecily becoming a blur through Rowans thick tears. The hand holding her tugged again and she allowed herself to be pulled up, Cecily’s tiny body rolling off her, Rowan was led away but she turned back once to look at Cecily, the little girl stretched out her hand toward Rowan, small tears falling from her eyes.
Rowan felt tired, so tired but she tried to turn, to go back for Cecily, her vision going black at the edges.
“Damnit, Rowan, your hurt!” The voice exclaimed, grabbing Rowans upper arm and leading her urgently away from the raging battle.
Rowan felt confused, struggling against the arms that were dragging her away, she kicked, scratched, she thought she even bit whoever was holding her but she was so tired she couldn’t remember couldn’t focus.
“No, no, Cecily’s hurt, I’m fine.” She protested, but she was so tired. If only she could lie down for a minute. The floor did look so soft. Rowan felt her eyes drooping, her body sagging.
“Not now Rowan, come on, stay with me just a little bit.” The voice urged, it sounded desperate, it sounded sad.