He glanced around. “Where’s Henrietta?”
Casey smiled. “She and her husband went to Helena for the day. She’ll be back tomorrow. McKinnon and I usually eat lunch together but he met his brothers in town to help them with supplies, so I’d love the company.”
“Thanks. I’d love to join you.”
“Wonderful. Just make yourself at home while I get everything ready.”
Back in the kitchen, Casey thought her dad’s visit was perfect timing. It was time they had a talk to bury the past, something she hadn’t been able to fully let go of until now. Her talks with McKinnon had helped, so had Corey’s always made her feel special around him.
A few moments later she returned to the living room to find him standing at the window, looking out at the mountains. “Lunch is ready, Dad.”
He quickly turned and met her gaze and she understood why. This was the first time she had ever called him “Dad.” “Okay, let me wash up. I’ll be right back.”
She inhaled deeply when he walked toward the back room. She had a feeling that going into the back had more to do with emotions than him needing to wash his hands. She hadn’t realized until that moment how calling him Corey instead of Dad had probably bothered him, although he had never mentioned it to her. He had respected her feelings and had given her time to come around on her own time and her own terms, and she appreciated him for doing that.
“So what are we having?”
She turned when he entered the kitchen. “Nothing special, just chicken salad sandwiches and lemonade,” she said, sitting down at the table.
“But it’s special to me, Casey,” he said in an earnest tone. “It’s not everyday a man gets to have lunch with his beautiful daughter.”
“Especially a daughter he didn’t know he had until a few years ago,” she said, watching him take the seat across from her.
“It doesn’t matter. The moment I found out about you, Clint and Cole, I fell in love immediately. Just knowing the three of you were mine meant the world to me and my love was absolute and unwavering.”
She nodded, believing that. “It took me time to come around,” she softly admitted. “Mom and I were close and she told me these stories and I believed them. I had a vision of the two of you loving each other and it hurt to know everything she’d said had been lies and you really hadn’t loved her at all.”
Corey reached out and captured her hand in his. “I did love your mother but in another way. Carolyn was special to me, Casey, don’t ever think that she wasn’t. She came into my life when I was at my lowest and we had some good times together. And because she was a good woman I knew I had to be truthful with her from the start. That’s the reason I told her that I could never love her completely—the way a man is supposed to love a woman—because my heart belonged to another.”
Casey nodded. “And I’m sure Mom appreciated you being honest with her. Some men wouldn’t have and that’s probably why whenever she mentioned your name, she could do it in a loving way.”
Casey didn’t say anything for a long moment and then she said truthfully, “I was prepared not to like Abby, especially when I found out she was the woman you had always loved instead of Mom. But Abby is someone who’s hard not to like. She’s a special lady, Dad, and you’re lucky to have her, and even luckier that she came back into your life after all these years. It’s as if the two of you are truly soul mates. You and Abby finally being together is a love story with a happy ending if ever there was one. I can see that now. I can also feel the love each and every time you look at her and she looks at you, and I truly believe that Mom never resented you loving someone else because you gave her something special. You gave her a part of yourself, even if it wasn’t your heart.”
Casey smiled and tightened her hold on the hand that held hers. She gazed into misty eyes and the thought that what she’d said had touched him truly meant a lot. “You are my father and I love you and I’m proud that I’m your daughter. I find joy being a part of your life like you’re a part of mine.”
She stood and moved around the table and when he also stood, she went into his outstretched arms thinking it felt good to finally let go of the anger and pain she’d held within her for so long.
She felt her heart thud against her rib cage thinking there was pain still harboring there. But it was pain of the self-inflicted kind. She was in love with McKinnon and was smart enough to know that things couldn’t continue between them as they were. In less than a month’s time Prince Charming would be fully trained and there would be no reason for her to remain on the ranch. She had gotten lax in looking for a place in town, but she knew she needed to start again. The thought had her heart breaking but deep down she knew it was something she had to do.
She forced the painful thought from her mind that, like her mother, she would live the rest of her life loving only one man and only have the memories of their love affair to sustain her.
Chapter 12
McKinnon picked up the phone the moment he walked out of the bedroom. He was on his way to town for a business meeting and Henrietta had left to do her weekly grocery shopping. “Hello?”
“Yes, this is Joanne Mills and I’m trying to reach Casey Westmoreland.”
McKinnon lifted a brow. He remembered Ms. Mills as the real-estate agent who had shown Casey a couple of places in town. “Ms. Mills, this is McKinnon Quinn. Casey is out in the barn taking care of one of the horses. Is there something I can do for you?”
“Oh, hello, Mr. Quinn. Yes, there’s something you can do. You can tell Ms. Westmoreland that after talking with her last week, something has come up on our listing that she might be interested in. The seller is willing to work out a good deal since he wants a quick sale.”
McKinnon leaned back against the table. Casey was considering moving off his ranch? Emotions clogged his throat, making it almost impossible for him to breathe.
“Mr. Quinn, are you still there?”
McKinnon forced himself to speak. “Yes, I’m still here and I’ll give her the message.”
“Thank you.”
McKinnon hung up the phone as a cold chill settled in his gut. He was being forced to admit something he thought could never happen to him again. He had fallen head over heels in love.
“Damn.”
He inhaled deeply knowing he had no right to even think about loving Casey. Yet he did. She was everything he could possibly want in a woman or a wife, but he couldn’t have her. So maybe it was for the best if she did decide to move on. Things had to eventually end between them anyway.
He quickly headed for the door, pausing briefly to snatch his hat off the rack. If Casey leaving was for the best, why was he feeling so damn bad about it?
* * *
Durango glanced across the table at McKinnon. The two of them had just ended their meeting with Mike Farmer, who had made them an offer they couldn’t refuse. Not only did Mike want to buy every foal Courtship produced, he also wanted Crown Royal’s stud rights at more than half-a-million a coupling. The man was convinced the stallion’s offspring would one day become a Triple Crown winner.
“What’s wrong with you, McKinnon? Farmer just made us wealthy men and you’re sitting there like you’ve lost your one and only puppy. Forget about that beer you’re drinking, man. We should be calling that waiter over to our table with a bottle of champagne to celebrate.”
McKinnon leaned back in his chair, remembering the phone call he’d taken right before leaving the ranch. “I don’t feel like celebrating, Rango.”
Durango sat up in his chair. A frown settled in. “Why not? Hey, what’s going on?”
McKinnon met Durango’s curious gaze. “That Realtor who’s helping Casey find a place in town called and left her a message that she might have found something. With Prince Charming almost trained, Casey really has no reason
to stick around, which means she might move into town.”
Durango stared at him for a moment before asking brusquely, “And what do you plan to do about it? I won’t waste my time asking if you love her because your attitude today has given me my answer. Take my advice about something, McKinnon.”
“What?”
“Stop brooding and do what you’ve always done. Go after what you want.”
McKinnon clearly understood what Durango was saying and a hard line formed at his lips when he drew in a deep breath. “This is different. I can’t do that.”
“Yes, you can.”
McKinnon’s anger flared and he refused to give in to the surge of emotions that was sweeping through him. “Dammit, Rango, I can’t do it because I love her. I can’t deny her the one thing she might eventually want one day.”
“But you don’t know for sure that’s what you’ll be doing. Casey deserves to know the truth, McKinnon, so tell her.”
McKinnon sighed deeply, remembering the night he’d asked her if she wanted children and what her response had been. “Why bother? Things can’t be that way between us, Rango. I can’t let it. She deserves more,” he said grimly.
“Well, I think,” Durango said softly, “that you’ll be doing the both of you a disservice if you make a decision without giving her a say in the matter. If you want her, McKinnon, don’t let anything stand in your way. Tell her the truth and see how things work out. Take it from someone who knows. The love of a woman, a good woman, is the greatest gift a man could ever receive.”
Durango took a swallow of his beer before he went on. “If you’re so convinced she’s going to leave anyway, what do you have to lose?”
* * *
Casey glanced across the table at Henrietta as the older woman peeled a bunch of apples for the pie she intended to bake later. There was something Casey wanted to know and was hoping Henrietta would have an answer for her. “Henrietta, who is Lynette?”
The woman stopped what she was doing and glanced over at Casey, her eyes sharp. “Who mentioned Lynette to you? I know it wasn’t McKinnon.”
Casey nodded. “No, it wasn’t McKinnon. Norris let her name slip one day saying that I was nothing like her and he was glad.”
Henrietta smiled. “No, you aren’t anything like her. And it’s not that Lynette was a totally bad person. It’s just that she didn’t stick by McKinnon when she should have, especially when she claimed she loved him. The woman hurt the boy something awful.”
Casey couldn’t help but wonder just what Lynette had done. It didn’t sound as if she’d been unfaithful to McKinnon. And how should she have stuck by him? Was this Lynette the reason he refused to open his heart to another woman? “Does she still live around these parts?” she asked.
Henrietta shook her head. “No, thank goodness. From what McKinnon told me, Lynette is married now with a child and living somewhere in Great Falls. The last thing McKinnon needs is to see Lynette and her baby.”
Casey tilted her head back. Now her mind was flooded with even more questions. Why would seeing Lynette with a baby bother McKinnon? Had he and Lynette lost a baby together or something? She couldn’t help but ponder Henrietta’s statement. “But why would that bother him?”
Henrietta glanced over at Casey as if she was about to say something, then changed her mind and shrugged wide shoulders. “It’s not my place to say, Casey. Maybe one day McKinnon will tell you all about her. About everything.”
Casey doubted it. In fact, since waking that morning she’d noticed a change in McKinnon. Usually they ate breakfast together but this morning he had already eaten and left before she’d awoken. He’d been acting strange ever since mentioning Joanne Mills’s call. Was he upset that she had resumed looking for a place to live? Did he think she was supposed to just continue to live here with him forever? She really didn’t know what to think but she hoped it was her imagination and that McKinnon wasn’t trying to put distance between them again.
“Thanks for at least letting me know who she is,” Casey finally said to Henrietta.
“No problem,” Henrietta said quietly. “Like I said, that woman hurt him but now you’ve made him happy.”
Casey smiled. “You think so?”
Henrietta chuckled. “I know so. He smiles now more and his disposition and moods aren’t like they used to be, and you’re the reason for it. And I know you love him, too. And I mean really love him.” The older woman was silent for a few moments and then she said, “Just promise me one thing.”
“What?”
“No matter what happens, follow your heart and you can’t go wrong. When it comes to love, there’s no way you can turn your back on it and walk away. There’s no way.”
* * *
Casey was waiting for McKinnon later that night when he got in. He hadn’t come home for dinner, which only deepened her belief that he was trying to avoid her. She was standing by the fireplace and he looked over at her the moment he opened the door.
“McKinnon,” she acknowledged when he didn’t say anything. “I looked for you at dinner.”
He shrugged, closing the door behind him. “Something came up and I had to stay on the range longer than expected. I’m surprised you’re still up.”
For some reason she got the impression he’d been hoping that she hadn’t been up, and that only strengthened her resolved and made her even more determined to find out just what was going on with him. “Yeah, I’m surprised, too. Especially since we’ve been going to bed early a lot.”
There…she had deliberately made him remember how their nights had been for the past three weeks. He would rush home every day and they would get dinner, take a shower together, go to bed and make love.
“Yeah, well, like I said, I’ve been busy. Besides, I’ve been thinking.”
She suddenly felt a little queasiness settle in her stomach. “About what?”
“About us. You’ll be through training Prince Charming in a few more weeks and will be moving on. I even understand you’re looking to buy a place in town and—”
“Is that’s what this is about, McKinnon? Are you upset that I resumed looking for a place in town? Because if you are, then—”
“Upset? Why should I be upset about anything? You and I both knew things between us wouldn’t last and it’s no problem, no big deal. You’re doing the right thing by moving on.”
She flinched. It sounded as if he hadn’t cared, and she refused to believe that. She didn’t want to believe it. Yes, she had known the score, but at some point the rules had changed not only for her, but for him, as well. Although she couldn’t claim that she thought he had fallen in love with her the same way she had fallen in love with him, she refused to believe she had been nothing more than a willing body to him.
“Is that what you really want, McKinnon?”
He hesitated a moment before answering. “Yes. It will be for the best.”
Casey sighed deeply, intent on giving him what he wanted. She had her pride and refused to carry a torch for a man who didn’t love her—like her mother had with her father. She’d thought just the memories of what the two of them shared would suffice, but now she knew that they wouldn’t. And she had a feeling that at some point her mother discovered that fact, as well.
At that moment she fully understood how her mother must have felt knowing that although she had loved Corey Westmoreland, he did not love her. But he had given her babies, which to Carolyn Roberts were all the memories she needed. Casey was certain that each time her mother gazed into her children’s faces, which so closely resembled the man she had loved, she was content. And that contentment had lasted until the day she had died. In realizing that, Casey’s love and admiration for her mother increased.
Now Casey was faced with a similar decision. During all those times she and McKinnon had made love, they�
��d never once used protection. The first couple of times had been during the wrong time of the month, but the recent times had not. That meant she could possibly find herself in the same situation her mother had. Single and pregnant by a man who didn’t love her. But unlike her mother, who’d kept silent, she intended to let McKinnon know it.
“Fine, I’ll leave and find someplace else when my business here is finished, and if I’m pregnant you’ll know it. There were a number of times that we engaged in unprotected sex.”
For a moment he looked as if she’d slapped him. After a few seconds of silence he finally said, “You aren’t pregnant.”
She laughed softly to hide her pain. “Oh, so you’re a doctor now, McKinnon?”
He leaned back against the closed door and placed his arms across his chest. His face was rigid and stern. “No, but I know you aren’t pregnant. There’s no way you can be.”
Casey frowned as she stared at him. “And what makes you so certain of that?”
Here we go again, McKinnon thought. Tell her so she can do the same thing Lynette did. Lynette didn’t waste any time packing up her stuff and hauling ass because you could never give her the children she wanted. So go ahead and tell Casey the truth and see how fast she leaves.
He would never forget how he had arrived back at the ranch or his meeting in town with Durango and Mike Farmer. He’d been determined to follow Durango’s advice and confront Casey, tell her the truth and let the decision be hers. But when he’d walked in on her in the barn, she’d been talking to Dawn Harvey, the wife of one of his ranch hands who’d had a baby a few months earlier. She had brought the baby by and Casey had been holding it, smiling down at it, teasing the infant by making funny sounds—baby talk. He had known after seeing the glow on her face that he could never deny her from being a mother. He loved her too much to deny her something like that.
He sighed deeply as he lowered his arms and moved away from the door to start crossing the room toward Casey. When he came to a stop in front of her, he tried to recall the exact moment he’d fallen in love with her and couldn’t. Chances were it had been the first time he’s seen her at Stone and Corey’s weddings. But he could recall when he had first accepted that he loved her in his heart. It had been that night they had made love for the first time and she had deliberately seduced the hell out of him. Not only had he surrendered his body to her, but on that night he had surrendered his heart to her, too.
Dreams of Forever: Seduction, Westmoreland StyleSpencer's Forbidden Passion Page 14