Up until now, Charlotte-Anne had been listening attentively and speaking only when called upon to do so. She had decided, for once, that no matter what decree her mother meted out, she would not put up an argument.
'As we both know,' her mother was saying, 'your grades at Brearley this past year have been . . . well, shall we say, unsatisfactory?'
Charlotte-Anne smiled wryly. 'They've been atrocious.'
Elizabeth-Anne laughed. 'Whatever you say, but there's no need for us to hurl insults. I realize now what I, and I suppose every mother in the world, does not want to have to face.' She sighed sadly. 'That a child she loves dearly has grown up right in front of her eyes. You are now an adult, Charlotte-Anne, and I think it's time I treated you as one.
'At any rate, I believe your unsatisfactory grades in school have been due in large part to the energies you have lavished upon your theatrical ambitions instead of your studies. Therefore, I think it would be nice now if you expended at least half as much attention on your studies as you have on the theater. However, you are nearly grown up, and some things cannot be forced. Whether more schooling serves you or not is to be seen. But as a young adult, I think there is no harm if you acquire a little polish. I'm sure even the actress in you will agree with that.'
Charlotte-Anne nodded.
'I want you to know that I don't blame you for what has happened,' Elizabeth-Anne continued. Her voice was soft and wistful. 'I have been lax also. I've been paying altogether too much attention to the business, and neglecting my family in the process. I should have seen what was happening with you, but I never took the time. However, that's all water under the bridge now. We can only look back upon the past to learn from it. Otherwise, the past is useless.'
Elizabeth-Anne paused for a moment. It was important that Charlotte-Anne realized that what was coming was what she believed was best for her and not a punishment. She had thought about it all night long, and this morning, she had made some telephone calls. Still, good intentions all too often pave the road to misery. It seemed so difficult to try and set things right.
'I surmise,' Elizabeth-Anne said gently, 'that you have been hurt by this involvement with Mr. Hoyt?'
Charlotte-Anne looked thoughtful. 'Yesterday, I thought I was, but I'm not so sure about it today. He used me, I see that now. But I tried to use him, too. Only I wasn't as good at it.'
Elizabeth-Anne nodded. 'That's a very mature outlook, and I'm pleased. I know it hurts to have to put things in such brutal terms. Nevertheless, I think it would be a lot easier for you to get him totally out of your system if you were further removed from his orbit. Residual feelings always linger a while, especially with a well-known person. Each time you see his picture in a magazine, or his name on a billboard, you are bound to feel a little pain.'
Charlotte-Anne frowned thoughtfully. 'I don't think that will pose much of a problem now. I can handle it, I think.'
Elizabeth-Anne held up a hand. 'Nevertheless. The school to which I've decided to transfer you is a boarding school.'
'Mamma!' Charlotte-Anne cried, truly surprised.
'Please hear me out, dear. You must understand that this is not a punishment of any sort. It's a fine school where they can teach you a lot. And not just about mathematics and history, though they teach that too. L'Ecole Catroux is basically a finishing school. They turn girls into young ladies and prepare them to face society. Besides, I don't think a little bit of international exposure will hurt you.'
'Interna . . . '
'A young lady needs to travel, Charlotte-Anne, and I hear Switzerland is quite lovely. At the risk of repeating myself, a little grace and polish has never hurt anyone. L'Ecole Catroux is in Geneva, and it comes highly recommended. A lot of American girls go there, as well as English girls and others from all over the world, all from the finest families. You will make new friends and acquaintances that you would otherwise never have an opportunity to meet. Neither will it hurt you to pick up another language.'
Elizabeth-Anne paused, her face set with pain. 'It hurts me to see you go. You must believe that. I still find it difficult to face the fact that you're grown up now. If it were up to me, I'd like nothing more than to keep you with me always, and smother you. But that's selfish, and I refuse to ruin your life. You must learn to be independent. I know that now. That's what made you try so hard to become an actress, and drove you straight into Mr. Hoyt's arms. He was not so much to blame as I.
'It is my sincerest wish that you will remain at Catroux until the end of next year. However, if you wish to come home or quit on your eighteenth birthday, which is only six months from now, I leave the choice entirely up to you. You will be of age and, legally at least, be capable of making your own decisions from then on.
'If, at any time, you still want to avidly pursue an acting career, I will help you in any way I can.'
Charlotte-Anne looked at her mother. 'Switzerland sounds so . . . so far away. I've never been gone from home.'
Elizabeth-Anne leaned forward and reached out, placing her hands over Charlotte-Anne's. Her voice was as gentle as her touch. 'There comes a time, Charlotte-Anne, when each of us must take the first step toward independence. That is what you will do now. Try to look at it this way: as a result, you'll be better prepared to face the world than most.'
'About your offer, to help me pursue acting when I return. It stands even if I come back in six months?'
'Yes.'
'I mean . . . you'll really help me?' Charlotte-Anne stared at her mother.
Elizabeth-Anne faced her squarely. 'I think you know by now that I never make promises I don't keep.'
Charlotte-Anne nodded.
'If you're serious, yes, I'll do what I can. I'll support you financially so you can concentrate fully on acting and nothing else. I'll pay for acting classes, or coaches, or whatever it is you need. And you can live away from home if you like. I'll even try - if it's within my power, that is - to open whatever doors I'm able.' She smiled mysteriously. 'I hear that investors in shows can sometimes pull enough strings to get someone a part. God knows, I have enough money. I'm sure some producer wouldn't mind parting me from some of it.'
'Oh, Mamma!' Charlotte-Anne looked ready to burst into tears. She was at once relieved and elated. She had expected her mother to lecture and punish her. Instead, she was being offered everything she wanted. On an impulse, she jumped up from the couch, slid over to her mother's, and squeezed her tightly.
'I hope,' Elizabeth-Anne said, 'that you'll promise to learn as much as you can at Catroux, and give the teachers as few problems as possible. And as for the trip across the Atlantic, you won't be alone. Robyn Morgan is sailing for Europe next week on the Ile de France, and I've arranged for you to take the same crossing. She said she'd be delighted to have you accompany her.'
Charlotte-Anne was overjoyed. They'd known Robyn for years now and Charlotte-Anne not only liked her, she admired her. Robyn Morgan wove that indefinable spell around herself which Charlotte-Anne hankered for. And while six months spent at a strange school in a foreign country frightened her, it wasn't really that long. She'd waited in vain for at least three months for Mickey Hoyt to pop up with a script.
'And now,' Elizabeth-Anne said, getting to her feet, 'I think it wouldn't hurt if we did some shopping. You'll need some new clothes. We can't have a Hale arriving in Switzerland in rags, can we?' Her eyes twinkled with amusement. 'Or in her mother's clothes?'
Charlotte-Anne looked contrite. 'I'm sorry, Mamma.'
Elizabeth-Anne laughed. 'I will say one thing,' she said, putting an arm around Charlotte-Anne's shoulder. 'You do my clothes justice.'
'Mamma?'
Charlotte-Anne's tone was so serious that Elizabeth-Anne looked at her daughter worriedly. 'Yes, dear?'
'Larry . . . you're going to marry him, aren't you?'
'Of course! We've got it all set up. In fact, he's running around town making the arrangements right now. We'll be married here in a civil ceremony downtown, followed
by a very small wedding at The Little Church Around the Corner. Just for family, and a few assorted friends like Robyn and Ludmila.'
'I hate to have to miss it.'
'And I wouldn't have you to, not for the world.' Elizabeth-Anne laughed. 'I told you Robyn was coming, didn't I? Well, she can't be in two places at once. And neither can you. The wedding will be held the afternoon before you sail.'
Charlotte-Anne felt the warmth of the bond between herself and her mother. Suddenly she realized how much they loved each other, although they'd never said it. She took her mother's hand and lifted it to her lips. 'I'm glad, Mamma,' she said. 'I wouldn't want to leave with any hard feelings between us.'
'And I wouldn't want that either.'
'It's funny, you know?' Charlotte-Anne looked at her. 'I never knew we could talk like this.'
'Just remember. Anytime you want to discuss something with me, feel free to do so.'
Charlotte-Anne nodded. 'You know what?' Her eyes began to well with tears. 'I . . . I feel that we're closer than we've ever been before. Like we're not just mother and daughter. I feel like we're . . . '
Elizabeth-Anne smiled into her daughter's eyes. 'Friends?' she asked.
4
Spring burst upon New York in its glorious splendor just in time for the wedding. It was one of those rare, sparkling days, a balmy surprise tucked between two late winter cold spells. It took little imagination to fancy Elizabeth-Anne as a June bride.
The little church on East Twenty-Ninth Street was filled with white lilies, roses, carnations, tulips, and peonies.
Charlotte-Anne gasped as her mother was led to the altar, a tiny white bouquet of lilies of the valley in her hands. Elizabeth-Anne had never looked more lovely. She wore a dove gray lace dress, gray satin picture hat, and gray satin pumps. Around her neck was the three-tiered pearl necklace Larry had given her that morning. And he looked splendid beside her in his custom-tailored dark suit with a white carnation in his lapel, and a dark, velvet patch over his eye. It was hardly the society wedding of the year, although if they had so chosen it could easily have become that. It was simply a lovely wedding for family and a few close friends, which was just the way they had wanted it. Ludmila cried and blew her nose noisily through the ceremony.
Then, a few hours later, it was time for Charlotte-Anne to leave. Larry's stately yellow-and-black Rolls-Royce, which Elizabeth-Anne was to keep in perfect running condition for the rest of her life, and which was still festooned with garlands of white flowers for the wedding procession, was loaded with new Vuitton luggage, a going away gift to Charlotte-Anne from Larry. They drove over to the West Side, where the Ile de France was berthed.
Elizabeth-Anne and Larry had secured her a large, first class stateroom next to Robyn's, but they hardly had a chance to glance at it. Shortly after they had boarded, a deep blast of the liner's horns carried mournfully across the water.
'It's time we left,' Larry said. 'All visitors have to get off now.'
Charlotte-Anne nodded. It was with both excitement and a heavy heart that she bid her family farewell. For the first time since she could remember, she felt truly close to them all. Now she realized with a pang just how sorely she would miss them.
'Well, Mrs. Hochstetter,' Charlotte-Anne said to her mother. 'How does it feel to be married?'
'Truthfully, quite the same as before,' her mother said with a smile. 'I've loved Larry for a long time. But the hotels will still be called Hale hotels; I'll keep my own 'stage' name, so to speak. In public I'll still be Elizabeth-Anne Hale. But in private life, I'm Mrs. Lawrence Hochstetter.' She smiled at Larry, then looked intently at Charlotte-Anne. Her voice broke. 'I'll miss you, dear.'
'And I'll miss you, Mamma. Too bad I won't be around for the move.'
'Move?' Elizabeth-Anne looked puzzled. 'What move?'
'To the Hochstetter mansion, of course!'
'Oh, dear me, no. It's the other way around. Larry is moving into the penthouse with us. We decided quite some time ago that we'll be comfortable enough there. Besides, I'd feel strange rattling around that mansion. And then, there's the economic side of it. Why pay for a huge staff of servants when we have the entire hotel staff at our disposal. Dallas and a chauffeur is all we need. The hotels will simply absorb Larry's servants. This way they won't be out of work, and at the same time, we cut our costs.'
'Always the businesswoman,' Charlotte-Anne smiled. 'You'll never change, Mamma.'
Elizabeth-Anne pretended to look shocked. 'I surely hope not.' The tears shone in her eyes as she hugged her daughter. They exchanged kisses and she pressed a small box into Charlotte-Anne's hand.
'What's this?' Charlotte-Anne asked curiously.
'That's your father's necklace. The pansy charm. I want you to have it to remember us by.'
A sob escaped Charlotte-Anne's lips and she hugged her mother again.
Larry enveloped her in his arms and she stood on tiptoe to kiss him. 'Thank God stepfathers are never wicked.'
'I'll miss you, big girl. Just make sure you don't stay over there too long.'
'Oh, I wouldn't.'
'Don't be so sure. Europe has its magic. Some people love it and stay forever.'
Then Zaccheus shook her hand and gave her a reluctant peck on the cheek. 'Gee, you sure I can't come along, sis? This boat sure is neat.'
Charlotte-Anne smiled at him. 'I'm sure,' she said, smiling down at him sadly. She turned to Rebecca, and they embraced.
'I know we didn't always see eye to eye,' Charlotte-Anne told her thickly, 'but I'll miss you. I love you, and always will.'
'Me, too.' Rebecca kissed both her cheeks.
Charlotte-Anne nodded and threw her arms around Regina, who burst into tears. 'This is the first time we've ever been apart.'
'Don't worry,' Charlotte-Anne assured her oldest sister. They exchanged quick kisses. 'I'll be back real soon. And I'll be the actress while you'll be the doctor. Bet you'll even deliver my kids, huh?' Her voice grew husky. Her bravado was deserting her. 'We'll see each other, in no time.'
Regina nodded and smiled through her tears.
Neither of them could know that Charlotte-Anne would never see Regina alive again. Or Rebecca and Zaccheus, for that matter.
Charlotte-Anne watched as her family got off the ship. She stood outside on the deck, gripping the varnished railing as though trying to draw strength from the wood. She leaned over and looked for them in the crowd at dockside. Finally she spied the familiar faces, and she waved excitedly. There was another deep, mournful blast of the horn.
'Why, you're crying!' a voice said from beside her.
Charlotte-Anne turned and saw Robyn, looking stunning in a small hat with a short veil shading the top half of her face. She was smoking, and her cigarette was stuck in a long, ivory holder.
'I only cry at weddings and funerals,' Robyn declared. 'Never at sailings.' She took a puff on her cigarette and exhaled. 'I did cry a little this afternoon at your mother's wedding, you know. Weddings always have that effect on me.' She paused. 'Larry's found himself a fine lady.'
Charlotte-Anne nodded. 'I know.'
'Well, I suppose I'll go inside and make certain the maid is unpacking my things. If clothes are kept in suitcases for too long, they take forever to hang out. I'll leave my side of the connecting door unlocked in case you need anything. Feel free to visit anytime. After all, we're neighbors now.'
'Thank you, Mrs. Morgan.'
'Mrs. Morgan?' Robyn tilted her head back and laughed. 'You dear, sweet child. Don't make me feel so terribly old. You and I have six or seven long days ahead of us, and we'll be running into each other every time either of us turns around. We might as well call each other by our Christian names.' She inhaled on her cigarette, exhaled a plume of smoke, and cocked her head. 'On trains and ships it is the thing to do. You must call me Robyn.'
'Robyn,' Charlotte-Anne repeated tentatively.
'That's better.' Robyn flashed her a smile, gave a tiny wave with her fingertips, and
went back inside. The horn blasted again, this time with more urgency. Charlotte-Anne waved down to her family as the lines were cast off and the heavy ship began to move away from the pier, nudged by the tug boats which surrounded it like a gaggle of ugly ducklings clustered around a beautiful mother swan. Charlotte-Anne kept waving long after the individual faces receded from sight. Soon the ship was backed out into midstream and the tugs poked at it until the bow faced downriver.
Charlotte-Anne blinked back her salt tears and lifted her head. Dusk was coming rapidly, and the purple sky overhead was streaked with reds and oranges. On the shore, the massive concrete monoliths already glittered with a million lights. Only now did she realize that in the years since she'd come to New York, she had never noticed how truly beautiful and impressive the city was. She had gotten too used to it. When she'd walked on the sidewalks or crossed the streets, she had never taken the time to look up. That was how you had to see this city, with your head tilted back. She thought of so many things she'd never done, so many little, seemingly inconsequential things. They all seemed so important right now.
'Damn,' she swore in a tight little voice. 'I don't want to leave. I don't want to go to school in Switzerland. I only want to go home.'
For a long time she stayed out on the deck. Darkness came swiftly as the ship sailed down the island and off through the harbor. Charlotte-Anne walked back along the promenade deck, watching the Statue of Liberty slipping by. Then the ship headed out into the Narrows and the lights of the city receded, growing dimmer and dimmer in the distance. She had the impression that New York was Atlantis sinking slowly into the sea. Then it was swallowed up completely by the blackness of the ocean and the sky.
They were at sea. A brisk, chill wind tugged at her clothes, fluttering and snapping her skirt. The other passengers had long since gone inside. She was alone on the deck.
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