“Jameson?”
“I’ve just been thinking.”
“About?”
“About what I should do next.”
“You mean with your career?”
“No, I mean in general.”
Candace sat up and leaned against the headboard. “I’m listening.”
“It’s just… You know where you are heading.”
“And, you aren’t sure where that leaves you.”
“No. No, I’m saying this all wrong.”
“Honey, you’re not saying much of anything.”
Jameson sighed again.
“Jameson, talk to me.”
“I don’t want you to…”
Candace leaned over, took hold of Jameson’s hands and smiled. “I told you when I decided to launch this campaign never to forget that you are the most important person in my life.”
“I know.”
“Stop worrying about me.”
“That’s never going to happen,” Jameson said.
“Okay, then stop letting your worries keep you from talking to me.”
Jameson sucked in a deep breath. “What would you think if I offered to work with a couple of NGOs?”
Candace narrowed her gaze. “What kind of NGOs?” she asked.
“I was thinking Habitat for Humanity for one.”
Candace nodded. “You want an excuse to get your hands dirty.”
Jameson laughed. “I want to do something that matters.”
“Jameson…”
“And, I want to be there for you as much as I can be, for the kids too.”
Candace kissed Jameson tenderly.
“Does that mean you approve?” Jameson asked.
“You don’t need my approval. You know that I’ll support you.”
“As long as I stay off ladders?”
“There is that,” Candace chuckled. “I think there is more that you aren’t telling me.”
Jameson sighed. “I’m not sure how to explain this. And, I don’t want you to think that I have second thoughts about this campaign.”
“Go on.”
“It’s just—we both know that you will be away more. Even when you are home… Well, Candace, you’re going to be preoccupied a lot more. The kids…”
Candace smiled. “They are all lucky to have you in their lives.”
Jameson shook her head. “I hope so.”
“Why would you question that?”
“It’s not that I question it. It isn’t. I just—sometimes I feel like I have all these holes that need to be filled in. Do you know what I mean? Like for instance, what was Shell like when she was ten or fifteen? Does Coop do any of the same things that Jonah did? I don’t have anything to compare it to. I don’t know…”
“I think I understand. I feel that way with Cooper sometimes.”
“You do?”
Candace nodded. “Of course, I do. I can remember Jonah’s first tumble and Marianne’s first words. With Cooper, there are blank spaces that I can’t fill in. So, yes; I think I understand what you mean. I’m not sure why you would be afraid to tell me that.”
“I’m not.”
“Really?” Candace challenged gently
Jameson searched for the right words to reply. She wasn’t afraid to tell Candace anything. At times, Jameson still worried about her relationship with each of Candace’s children. She did know that all of Candace’s children and grandchildren looked to Candace for guidance consistently. And, Jameson was aware that Candace’s accessibility on a moment’s notice would be challenged in the coming months and years. In a way, that presented an opportunity for Jameson. She wanted to be the person that Candace’s children could seek out in Candace’s absence, and she didn’t want Candace to take that the wrong way.
“Jameson?”
“I just want to be there—not just for you—for them.”
Candace smiled. “You’re always there for all of us.”
“I hope so, but Candace, with you away it… Well, it might give me a chance to…”
Candace leaned over and placed a kiss on Jameson’s lips.
“What was that for?” Jameson asked.
“For being you,” Candace replied. “I think that sometimes you forget how often the kids go to you first.”
“I don’t think…”
“I don’t think so either. I know so. But I understand why you feel the way you do. I don’t ever want you to feel that you have to give up something because of my career.”
Jameson shrugged. “Compromise is part of life,” she said. “I don’t see any of this as giving something up. It’s more like trying something new.”
Candace smiled.
“What?” Jameson asked.
Candace lifted her brow.
“What?” Jameson repeated. “Why are you grinning like that?”
“I just know how lucky I am.”
“I should hope so with all those damn fortune cookies you eat.”
Candace whacked Jameson playfully.
“So, what do you think about my idea? Me offering my experience to a couple of NGOs? Would that hurt your campaign or…”
“I can’t see how my wife wanting to help people would hurt my campaign.”
“But?”
“How many ladders do you expect will be involved?”
Jameson laughed. “How about I promise that if there are any animals in the vicinity, I will stay grounded?”
Candace laughed. “You’re a lunatic.”
“Well?”
“Just be careful.”
“Are we talking about the ladders?”
“Partly,” Candace confessed. “Be careful not to close yourself off, Jameson. If it feels right to you to go back to work in some capacity, I want you to do that. I mean it.”
“I promise.”
“And, don’t ever underestimate the role you play with the Three Stooges. They’d be as lost without you as I would be.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“I do.”
“Thanks,” Jameson said.
“For?”
“You already know.”
Candace pulled Jameson into her arms and laid back on the bed. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Jameson replied. “Don’t forget to take your own advice.”
“You think I might be inclined to want a second job?” Candace laughed.
“Ha-ha. I think you need to remember that we would all be lost without you. You are so busy trying to take care of all of us that you forget we all want to take care of you too.”
Candace closed her eyes and held onto Jameson tightly. She did know that. It was a fact that often gave her pause. Her decision to climb onto the political roller coaster impacted everyone in her life. She hoped that she could protect them around the inevitable curves. “I’ll remember.”
“Good.”
Candace was content to lie silently with Jameson in her embrace. She felt Jameson’s breathing deepen and sighed. She kissed Jameson’s head softly. “I promise, I will try.”
***
“What is this?” Grant Hill asked.
“Open it,” Bradley Wolfe instructed him.
Grant opened the envelope, took a deep breath and nodded. He closed it and looked back at the man standing in front of his desk. “What does that have to do with Governor Reid?”
“Nothing specifically—yet.”
“What do you want from me?” Grant asked.
“Ammunition.”
“I would’ve thought you’d be talking to Lawson.”
Wolfe grinned. “You helm the largest family values group in America. Who better to talk about what kind of values make a family?”
Grant nodded. “I’ll see what I can find out.”
“You do that.”
Grant watched as Wolfe left his office. “Shit.” We have a different idea about values and family. He picked up his phone. I hope she’s busy.
Chapter Four
Candac
e massaged her temples. It did little to relieve her tension or the throbbing in her head. She threw her glasses onto her desk in frustration. “Damnit!” With a deep breath, Candace picked up the phone.
“Hello?”
“I got your message.”
“Not what you wanted to hear, I’ll bet,” Grant replied.
“Grant… I want you out of this before it gets any uglier.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
“It’s going to get uglier…”
“I’m not walking away. We’ve both come too far.”
“Grant…”
“No,” Grant put Candace’s thought to rest. “I just need to know what you want me to do. Hold it up or…”
“No,” Candace said. “Grant, if Wolfe brought you this, chances are he already knows.”
“About me?” Grant asked.
“Yes.”
“You think he’s testing me.”
“You don’t?”
Grant sighed. “I don’t know what to think. If you’re right…”
“You are already compromised. Listen to me; it’s time for you to pull back,” Candace advised.
“What do we do now? I mean, if Wolfe knows, Klein and Ritchie know.”
Candace rubbed her eyes in a vain attempt to gain some clarity. She did not doubt that Grant’s identity had been discovered. The only question that lingered in her mind was what the end game was. How did Wolfe plan to exploit the information that Grant was Jessica’s son? Candace imagined that her relationship with Grant had also come to light. She had feared that this might happen.
“Mom will…”
“Your mother will be fine, Grant.”
“You think that they will come out with it; don’t you?” he asked.
Candace closed her eyes. “I do.” She heard Grant’s sharp intake of breath.
“I need to tell my parents.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Grant said. “I don’t have any regrets. I would do the same thing all over again.”
“I know.”
“I should call Mom.”
“Let me.”
“I can’t ask you to…”
“You didn’t. Let me talk to your mother.”
“Candy, I… You two have become friends again and I…”
Candace smiled. Being someone’s child, being someone’s parent—age had little bearing on the need for acceptance a child felt nor a parent’s inclination to protect. “Jessica and I will be fine too,” she said. “Talk to your parents. I’m sure your mother will call you after I speak with her.”
“Candy… I’m sorry… I…”
“Grant,” Candace addressed him gently. “You have nothing to apologize for.”
“I don’t want this to cause your candidacy any harm.”
“Stop worrying about me,” Candace said. “I promise; we will talk later.”
“Are you…”
“I’m fine. Let me handle this now,” she told him. “I’ll talk to you in a bit.”
Candace hung up the call and let her face fall into her hands. “Deep breath, Candy.”
***
“Shell?” Melanie looked at her wife with concern.
“Hey.”
“What’s going on?” Melanie wanted to know.
“I need to talk to you about something.”
“Okay?”
“I... I’m not sure how to explain this.”
“Babe, you can tell me anything,” Melanie said.
“I know. It’s crazy when I think about it. I mean, when we first talked about what our life would look like, I assumed that you would be the one to carry our children. I don’t know why; I just did.”
Melanie nodded. “And, now?”
Michelle shrugged. “I want that. I do.”
“But?”
“No. I do want that. It’s just that I kind of got used to the idea that I would… Well, you know; that I…”
“That you would be the one having our baby.”
Michelle nodded.
Melanie leaned in and kissed Michelle’s cheek. “You still can.”
Michelle’s eyes widened in surprise. “You were so excited that you might be able to…”
“I am,” Melanie agreed. “But, Shell, that doesn’t mean you can’t. I mean, I always thought we would do this at least twice.”
“At least twice?” Michelle laughed.
“You didn’t?”
Michelle smiled. “I’ve been so caught up in how we would start our family, I really hadn’t given it a lot of thought. But, yes; I would want our child to have a brother or sister if possible.”
“Me too.”
“I just… I’m a little worried about you too,” Michelle admitted.
“I know you are. I will be okay if this doesn’t work. I will,” Melanie chuckled. “I know most people might find it hard to believe, but this is something I’ve always wanted since I was a kid. Some people dream about mansions and fairytale weddings. Me? I was the weirdo that dreamed about a minivan.”
Michelle smiled. “It is a little weird,” she teased.
Melanie laughed. “Why didn’t you just say something?”
“I don’t know. It will sound crazy.”
“If I couldn’t handle crazy, we wouldn’t be having this discussion at all.”
“True,” Michelle agreed. “I don’t know. It’s not like I never wanted kids. I mean, I love kids. I just never gave much thought to the idea that I might give birth to any.”
Melanie nodded. “And now?”
“And, now? I think it’s something I want to do.”
“Then we will make that happen.”
“You’re not upset?”
“Upset? Shell, sometimes you really are a little crazy. Why would that upset me? Listen, we will be lucky if it works out for me. I know that. The odds are still not in my favor. I’d still like to try. It might take some time. To tell you the truth, this makes me feel a lot better.”
“It does?”
“If I can’t—I mean, I think that we should agree on a time-frame. How long do we try to get me pregnant before we try something else? I don’t think I could handle years of disappointment.”
“What are you thinking?” Michelle asked.
“We try for a year or so. If we don’t have any luck, we move to our other options.”
“Are you sure?”
Melanie nodded. “I can’t go on and on in disappointment, Shell. What matters most to me is that we get to have a family together, not how we do that. I have something I need to tell you too.”
“What?”
“I’ve been thinking that maybe someday we could look to adopt.”
Michelle smiled.
“You don’t look surprised,” Melanie observed.
“I’m not. And, I would love to do that. I would do that even if everything works out.”
“Trying to keep up with your mom?” Melanie teased.
“No,” Michelle held up her hand. “Four? Hell no! Three’s company. Four’s insanity.”
“Oh? So, you wish that she hadn’t adopted Coop?”
“What? No! I love Coop. It’s different, though. In a lot of ways, it’s like Mom only has one now.”
Melanie laughed out loud.
“What?”
“Somehow, I doubt your mom or JD would agree with that assessment.”
“You don’t think so?”
“No.”
“Well, I mean she does have Marianne at home, but she’s not always there so…”
Melanie smiled. “I don’t think that’s what it’s about,” she said. “Your mom is everybody’s mom in a way. She’s the matriarch.”
Michelle smiled. “She is. Please tell me you aren’t hoping to keep up with her,” Michelle said.
“No,” Melanie chuckled. “But, I would never rule anything out where you are concerned.”
“Are we talking about kids?”
Melanie grinned.
> “Oh.” Michelle moved to wrap Melanie in her arms. “Let’s see how many things I can get you to rule in.”
***
“You look exhausted,” Jameson commented when Candace walked into the room.
“Understatement. I need to talk to you.”
Jameson put down the book she had been reading and gave Candace her full attention. “What’s wrong?”
“Grant.”
“Hill? What about him?”
Candace let out a long breath. “It seems that Ritchie and Lawson uncovered the truth.”
“That he’s Jessica’s son?”
“Not just that.”
Jameson nodded. “What does that mean?”
Candace flopped into a chair and sighed. “It means that we either wait for their next move or we take the ball and run with it.”
Candace was not one to sit idly by while someone attempted to derail her. She would not tolerate anyone she cared for being harmed in the process if she could help it.
“What do you need from me?” Jameson asked.
“Jessica is talking to Grant now. It’s up to him.”
“What is up to him? You have a plan. You always have a plan.”
Candace chuckled. True. “It depends on what he wants to do. I don’t know how his conversation with his adoptive parents went.”
“What is your best-case scenario?”
“I don’t think there is a best-case scenario this time,” Candace replied. “No matter what, Grant is going to get hurt. That’s unavoidable. And, no matter what I say or do, this will become fuel for their cause.”
“Fuel? How is it fuel? You accepted Grant as part of Jessica’s life. How can they possibly make that into a negative?”
Candace raised her brow. Jameson saw the world through her heart. Candace cherished that. Not everyone’s heart was the size of Jameson’s. There were many ways that Grant’s relationship with Candace could be leveraged against her. Right now, that was the least of her concern.
“Let me count the ways,” Candace said. “That isn’t the issue right now.”
“You’re worried about Grant or are you worried about Jessica?”
“Jess is fine,” Candace said. “She never would have pressed Grant to be open about their relationship. To be honest, I think part of her is relieved. She wants to eviscerate Wolfe and company. I’m not sure I will be able to reel her in.”
“And you?”
Candace shrugged. “It’s up to Grant.”
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