by Sarah Barrie
Jordan had always loved this house. The sparkling, polished wooden interiors, the beautiful soft furnishings, the lovely deep colours on the walls. It reminded her just how much work her own place needed. She leaned against the staircase now, wondering what to do, and heard Carol moving through the house, doing who-knew-what.
‘Well get your arse back from the cattleyards. I need to talk to you.’ How she could make such a statement sound affectionate, Jordan would never know, but the casual sentiment just made her feel more on edge. She wasn’t looking forward to Joel putting in an appearance. ‘For heaven’s sake Jordan, sit down! The staircase can hold itself up.’
Too tired to argue, she wandered past the open-plan kitchen and into the lovely livingroom, falling into the soft, inviting cushions of the enormous lounge. She could surely close her eyes…just for a minute.
‘Jordy.’
‘Joel…’ She sat up with a start and looked outside. It was nearly dark. ‘What time is it?’
‘You’ve been passed out for the better part of an hour. Truth is, I’m sorry to wake you.’
‘No…I have to get home. I’ve got animals to feed.’ She pushed her hands into her hair then clutched them there, squeezed her eyes closed then opened them and willed herself out of the haze of sleep. Joel pushed a cup of steaming liquid across the coffee table towards her. ‘Oh…thanks.’
‘Doesn’t look like you’ve been getting a lot of sleep.’
‘I’m fine,’ she dismissed, inhaling the heavenly scent of coffee.
‘You were always a crappy liar.’
‘Yeah, well you were always a crappy pool player, but I’m too polite to mention it…very often.’
‘Look, about you staying here —’
‘I’m not.’
‘Love, you have every right to be upset with me.’ He took a steadying breath and fiddled with the handle of his cup. ‘But the thing is, I panicked. I can tell you that there’s no worse feeling to a man than knowing he can’t protect what’s his. Caring for your family — whether they’re young, old or in between — it never goes away. And you’re family, Jordy. And we care about you. I let you down and I can only say I’m sorry.’ He looked up, looked her in the eyes. ‘It’s bad enough I got it so far wrong. The fact you feel you’re not welcome in this house — it shames me.’
Oh hell. She knew what a speech like that would have cost him. Neither of them were big on that sort of thing. ‘Joel, it doesn’t matter. Just forget it.’
He nodded, accepting the little she was prepared to offer, but his eyes were pleading. ‘Stay here tonight. Let Carol cook you dinner. I can head over and feed for you. Madi’s at Matt’s, but I’m sure once Carol tells her what’s going on she’ll head back — want to see you.’
‘No. Thanks.’ She softened at his hurt expression. ‘I need to go home. Please don’t worry Madi.’
‘Carol will stay with you then,’ he reluctantly agreed. ‘Harry said you shouldn’t be alone.’
They still aren’t listening! ‘Don’t you get it?’ Jordan replied in frustration. ‘He doesn’t want anyone there. That’s why Madi got hurt.’
Both of them looked up as Carol stomped down the stairs and dropped a bag at her feet. ‘I’ll have to finish my baking at your place, Jordy. Joel, I’ll need a hand carrying everything to the car.’ With that announcement, she headed into the kitchen.
Joel just looked at Jordan helplessly. ‘Are you planning on stopping her?’
So he had a point. She shrugged uselessly. ‘Whatever.’
‘Jordy…’
What was happening to them? She didn’t want to have to deal with anyone else falling apart. She didn’t think she could. One of the strongest, most dependable men she’d known in her life was having a crisis of conscience; the other one had wiped her completely. Harry had no idea what he was doing. The only person who seemed to be in control right now was the one she feared. It occurred to her to wonder what would be happening in a week from now…a month. But in reality it was hard to look past getting through another night.
‘It’s fine, Joel.’ She began to walk out, then, feeling guilty, turned around. He looked devastated. ‘Damn it,’ she muttered, and walked back across the room, giving him a hug. ‘I love you too.’ With a quick peck on the cheek, she let go, and saw Carol waiting with suspiciously wet eyes. ‘Come on, enough of this…we’ll have Oprah in here in a minute.’
Carol stayed at Jordan’s. She wouldn’t be dissuaded. So Jordan spent the night on the lounge with her rifle; watching, waiting. At dawn, she made herself busy with the day’s routine while the delicious aromas of Carol’s baking filled the house.
Carol didn’t leave until two o’clock to help set up for the party, and as she drove away, Katrina drove in. ‘Hi Jordan,’ she greeted, stepping out of her car. ‘I had to head out to Merv’s place so I thought I’d drop off a patient.’
She opened the back door and Mack hopped out. He was sombre, but his tail was wagging and he trotted up to sit happily at Jordan’s leg.
‘Hi buddy.’ She bent down and cuddled the dog to her like a lifeline. ‘Thank you,’ she told Katrina. ‘Thank you so much.’
‘My pleasure.’
‘Do you want to come in? I have to pay you —’
‘I’d take you up on that invite,’ she said with a smile, ‘but that brumby you gave Michael needs his tetanus booster and Michael’s decided to go with the Hendra vaccine as well. He’s picked up some work with Mitch Riley now, to pay for his horse. Did you know?’
‘No. I was wondering how they’re getting on. I’ve been meaning to call…’
‘Honestly, that horse is his whole world. It’s going to be the making of that kid. I’ll see you later.’
‘Well, thanks again Katrina. Really.’
‘See you tonight!’
Jordan watched her drive off. ‘Yeah, right,’ she mumbled. She had absolutely no intention of going to the Halloween party. Then a grin split her face and she turned her attention back to Mack. ‘Hey mate! You’re home. Come on in.’
Finally alone, she curled up on her bed with Mack at her feet and closed her eyes with gratitude.
She’d been asleep barely ten minutes when Madi turned up.
‘Jordy!’ she called, letting herself in.
Groaning, Jordan dragged herself from the bed and wandered out, nearly tripping over Mack and walking into the door on her way to the kitchen. Her eyes just didn’t want to work.
‘Looking good, honey.’
‘You’re one to talk,’ Jordan croaked, ‘with a face full of bruises and a fractured skull.’
‘Crappy mood, too. I’ll make you coffee.’
‘Madi.’ Jordan crossed the room and hugged her hard. ‘It’s good to see you,’ she said genuinely. ‘I’m so glad you’re okay. But shouldn’t you be resting or something?’
‘I’m better…almost. And I have a question. It’s bugging me. I need an answer.’
‘Shoot.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me about the notes?’ she demanded and slammed down the coffee cups she’d just retrieved from the cupboard. ‘What the hell were you thinking?’ Her voice rising, she stared hard at her best friend. ‘You’ve spoken to me every second day since the crash and you’ve been keeping the fact some maniac has been in your house to yourself? You just allowed yourself to be a victim! You!’
‘I am not a victim,’ Jordan defended wearily.
‘You’ve turned into some sort of…’ Madi waved her hands around, searching for words as she looked her friend critically up and down, ‘…irrational…skeletal…zombie! Not a victim my arse!’
Jordan just stared at her for several seconds. ‘I nearly got you killed, Madi.’
‘You didn’t. This sick bastard that ran me off the road did. That’s not on you! You’ve been playing right into his hands!’
‘What choice did I have?’
‘Are you joking?’
She couldn’t do this, couldn’t explain. Her brain wouldn’t
process. She put her fingers to her temples, pressed hard and sank down against the wall, needing to sit.
‘Talk to me.’ Madi sat beside her and waited.
‘God, you’re like your mother,’ Jordan smirked. Then her expression sobered, and she put her head in her hands. She closed her eyes again, yawned and shook her head. ‘I wasn’t being a victim — I wanted to catch him out.’
‘By yourself?’ Madi asked wryly.
‘I’ve been trying to at least get a look at him so when I went to Harry I would know who it was, not give the guy another chance to hurt anyone. But the longer it goes on…’
‘Mm?’
She released a long breath, and shook her head. ‘I can’t think straight. I’m too scared to sleep, too churned up to eat…I feel so guilty that you got hurt and so miserable that Reid is gone. I miss him. It hurts. But if he comes back I might just have to kill him.’
Madi nodded sympathetically. ‘It’s not just the freak. It’s the drug thing, Reid, my crash and the notes. And it’s all on top of weeks of stress about the sales. It’s all at once. I get it. It’s too much, Jordy. And as usual, you’re trying to deal with everything on your own.’ Madi slung an arm around her shoulders and squeezed. ‘Get dressed. We’re going to the party.’
‘Madi, have you heard a word I just said?’
‘Sure, but you can’t stay here alone while everyone’s there. And mum’s convinced it will do you good to be around people again. I agree with her.’
‘Thanks a lot.’
‘Hey, what are friends for? ‘
Jordan hesitated. ‘Until he’s found, it’s not safe for you to be here.’
‘Matt’s on his way. We’re both staying with you until this is sorted. End of discussion.’
‘Wonderful. Then I’m back on freak patrol. But I’m not going to that party.’
The fairy lights twinkled and the sound of music floated on the air. Balloons and streamers waved in the warm breeze, children ran and played with coloured glow sticks and helium balloons, while young people wandered around in the throes of first-loves, and couples danced, relaxed, eating and drinking, spread throughout the decorated hall and grounds beyond. It may not have been a traditional Australian event, but the Halloween Ball was one of Whitewater Creek’s claims to fame. It was an annual get together of epic proportions, just as big for the town as Christmas, New Years and Easter. Everyone dressed up — adults and children in full costumes.
Right now, Jordan was wishing they’d left it to the Americans. Madi had refused to go without Jordan, and Jordan had refused to go. Eventually, sick of the standoff, Matt had literally picked Jordan up and put her in the car. Jordan hadn’t had the energy to put up a decent fight, so under futile protest and on the strict condition that Mack came with them — because Jordan wasn’t leaving him at home alone — she had allowed herself to be brought along. But she’d refused to dress up. Madi and Matt, however, had decided to make an appearance as Beauty and the Beast, both dressed elegantly, although Matt had developed a severe stoop and wore a ridiculous mask.
She socialised for the first half-hour. It took effort. For appearance’s sake she snagged a beer off Matt, then headed over to the stage and offered to take care of the music. Once there, all she had to do was press the occasional button on a laptop when a playlist needed changing, otherwise she was free to just sit and watch, which suited her, because her head was alternately spinning and pounding and as a couple of hundred vampires, monsters and fairies danced while her eyes moved in and out of focus, she felt she might even be going just a tiny bit insane. Wait much longer, she silently told her freak, and I’ll be crazier than you.
Reid appeared in the crowded doorway and spotted Joel’s towering height straight away. He greeted them politely and, ignoring their evident surprise at seeing him, asked for Jordan. ‘She wasn’t home — and then I remembered Harry telling me about this…is she here?’
‘She might be,’ Carol replied sharply. ‘Why?’
Reid ignored the tone. He’d been expecting it. ‘I need to speak to her. Harry contacted me about the notes.’
A very angry Madi stepped between them. ‘What the hell are you doing here?’
‘Madi…how are you feeling?’
‘Good enough to kick your arse. What are you doing here?’
In any other circumstance he might have laughed at that. A smile almost struggled to the surface; didn’t quite make it. ‘I’m here to see Jordan.’
‘You really think she needs this right now?’ she asked desperately.
‘She can’t be alone.’
‘She’s been alone for weeks!’
‘She’s in danger, Madi.’
‘No shit,’ she snapped at him, shoving a finger into his chest. ‘And a big part of why is because Mr Expert — namely, you — convinced us we were all crazy and you knew better. Do this, you said, do that, she’s lying, she’s a drug addict. She’s not a fucking drug addict!’
‘Madi! Keep your voice down,’ Matt urged from behind them.
Reid was quiet, accepting. ‘You’re right,’ he finally agreed.
‘Damn straight I am. She loves you and you turned on her and left her to deal with a psychopath.’
‘And I don’t even know how to start making up for that. And Madi, I’m sorry for what he did to you, too.’ He sighed heavily, looked at them all in turn. ‘You should know: it’s Brian Dunmore. He killed Beau Davison…possibly a couple of other people, and caused your accident, Madi. And he means to follow through with his threats. He’s coming after Jordan.’
‘Oh my God.’ Carol clutched her hand over her heart. ‘Brian ran my baby off the road? Brian wrote those horrible notes to Jordy?’
‘I’m sure of it.’
‘What are you going to do?’
His expression set, eyes hard, he stared at Carol. ‘Whatever it takes.’
Carol studied that expression, the determination in his eyes, and apparently satisfied, nodded. ‘We’ve let Jordy down…all of us. We need to fix that. You know how to find Brian?’
‘I’ll get him,’ he promised, ‘and God help him when I do. Where is she?’
He saw the exchanged glances and Carol spoke. ‘We all dragged her out here so she wouldn’t be alone, but…’
‘But?’
Joel indicated to the stage. ‘Just…go easy. She’s not herself.’
Reid stared at Jordan in shock. He made a step toward the stage, then another. He greeted people and blew them off as he went. He’d make smalltalk later — he couldn’t do it tonight.
When he reached her she made no move to acknowledge he was even there. ‘Jordan.’
Jordan simply stared at the computer screen in silence. She’d seen Reid the second he arrived. Reaction had slammed into her, bringing to the surface painful emotions she was desperately fighting to keep from showing on her face. Harry must have called him — just like she’d known he would. So he was back, but what had changed? Nothing.
He’d seen her lose it once, seen that he could hurt her. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction again. So she continued to stare straight ahead, wondering just how the hell she was going to get out of there without so much as having to look at him. Because then she’d give it away. Then he’d see it for sure.
He crouched beside her, and she felt rather than saw him look up into the eyes she refused to turn on him.
‘Jordan, I know you’re angry, but I need to talk to you.’
When he lifted a hand to touch her she abruptly got to her feet, slammed the untouched beer onto the table and stalked off the stage. She didn’t stop until she reached Matt’s car. Knowing where he’d stashed the keys, she checked Mack was still securely tied to the tray, got behind the wheel and took off.
Madi and Matt were already at the door. ‘We were heading out there to stay with her tonight.’
‘Can you two get home?’
‘Yes, but you don’t get it.’ Madi pulled a hand through her hair. ‘She’s not going to l
et you through the front door.’
Reid’s features hardened. ‘I’m not giving her a choice.’
Jordan saw the headlights approaching as she made her final round of checking the house. Gun in hand, she edged the barrel out the kitchen door and, in the bright moonlight, clearly saw Reid step out of the car. Obviously he hadn’t got the message. Well, she’d just have to send him another one. Taking aim, she fired a warning shot at his feet and saw him duck behind the car.
‘Jordan, is that you?’ Reid chanced a look over the bonnet and saw her standing in the doorway. ‘I’m coming in.’
‘Now what would make him think a stupid thing like that?’ Jordan muttered to Mack.
She aimed again. This time, the bullet flew wide of his right arm. He paused, took a few more steps. ‘I know you’re a better shot than that.’ Another rang narrowly past his ear and he swore violently under his breath. ‘Okay, now you’re showing off.’ Reaching the stairs, he stopped in full sight. ‘Are you planning on hitting me this time?’
She was thinking about it…maybe just one or two toes. Could he not just leave? Mack raced out to greet him and she scowled, and marched into the house. Fine, she couldn’t shoot him — she might hit Mack — but she didn’t have to talk to him either. Reaching her room, she climbed onto the bed and hugging her rifle, closed her eyes.
‘Are you insane?’ the astounded voice came from the doorway. ‘Are you trying to get your head blown off? Jordan! Who sleeps with a loaded rifle?’
I do, she thought, though that wasn’t strictly true. Her eyes were just closed now to avoid conversation. Once he left she’d assume her usual position and wait for dawn.
‘Would you please just talk to me?’ he asked gently. When she didn’t move, she heard him walk across the room. ‘Yell at me, hit me, do whatever you damn well like, just snap out of it!’ He snatched the gun from her grasp and Jordan’s eyes flew open. She leapt from the bed and desperately made a lunge for it.
‘Give it back!’ she demanded in panic. ‘I need my rifle. Give it back!’