“Erwon, did I say Erdwon…? Why, I meant…Wonder.”
“Wonder?! This is it?” Frank exclaimed in shock.
“This is it?” Constance asked.
“We are all really here?” the kids all cried out in excited whispers.
“Well, this isn’t it, entirely. There are zillcadsions of places that you can go in Wonder.” They looked at him in confusion.
“No, that’s not it — hmmm…ah! There are scadzillions of places here — lots and lots of them! More than you could visit in a forever, but based on what I know about you folks, it makes sense that you’d wind up here. This is a good place to go when you are dustflered…ah, flustered about the realness and true-ness and The All of it All.”
“I take it from the smells you brought with you that you folks are pretty pukenash right now…oh dear…my, my, shaken-up, that is…about the basics. And so we shall begin to sort that out.”
They were all so shocked and thrilled to be out of trouble and so overwhelmed by the sight of Mr. Keeze (The Gate Keeper himself!) that they were as speechless as the Faultsoms could ever be, though their minds were bursting with hundreds of questions.
“Well, don’t just stand there looking like something the drat cagged in…ah, cat dragged in…We’ve got some serious Wondering around to do. Xartief has given me instructions to guide you around these parts and put some things to rights. We mustn’t delay.”
“Xartief? Who could that possibly be?” they asked themselves but, before they could even begin to ponder this, Mr. Keeze reached his little fat fingers up and onto his helmet and fumbled around, apparently trying to feel his way about its unusual surface. He began to pull out puzzle piece things from the helmet. One by one, he extracted them and when, upon inspection, he found them not to be what he was looking for, he would let the pieces go in midair and they would each whiz back into place on his headgear by means There’s is so much to be seen and done.” He continued to fumble around until he found a long, skinny sort of giraffish-shaped thingy that he pulled from his helmet. He squinted with one eye closed, and looked at it carefully. Determining that this was the sought-after item at last, he then escorted the family out of the happy light shower toward a long column of doors. They hadn’t noticed the doors before, but there they were, stretching out for an infinity to the right and the left, as if they were looking at a single door reflected back and forth thousands of times between two mirrors.
“Oh, for the love of tubtunteaper, I just had it here. Did I say “tubtunteaper?” Oh dear, what is a fellow to do with such a strange language as yours? For the love of…peanut butter…I simply don’t have anymore time to worry myslef, ah self…, about the right words. There’s is so much to be seen and done.” He continued to fumble around until he found a long, skinny sort of giraffish-shaped thingy that he pulled from his helmet. He squinted with one eye closed, and looked at it carefully. Determining that this was the sought-after item at last, he then escorted the family out of the happy light shower toward a long column of doors. They hadn’t noticed the doors before, but there they were, stretching out for an infinity to the right and the left, as if they were looking at a single door reflected back and forth thousands of times between two mirrors.
He walked tentatively toward the line of doors, which were all different from one another and each very curious and grand. He paced up and down in front of the doors for a bit, talking to himself:
“Hmmm, where did I leave that rood, no — it is called a door. Ah yes, here it is.” Then, pulling the giraffy thing from his helmet by its string, he put it into the one empty spot on the face of the portal he had selected where it fit perfectly. The puzzle piece was indeed a fantastic key, and as soon as the key clicked into place, it zinged back into its spot on Mr. Keeze helmet as all the other “roods” disappeared and the one before them swung wide open. They then found themselves entering what seemed like a long, long hallway that went straight — up.
“Here we go…everyone into the Enmast wupay…hmm…no it’s an up-way. Come on in now,” directed Mr. Keeze.
Not knowing what an “Enmast” was and having no other choices before them — but somehow knowing that Mr. Keeze was a safe guide — they proceeded to squeeze inside the up-way. This they did with the usual Faultsom banter and excitement rising among them, as it sank into each one that they were all safe and sound and all together in the very place they had been longing to gain entrance to for so long.
The door closed behind them.
“Ho there, Enmast, please take us on up.” And Enmast, whoever or whatever that was, quivered slightly around them as if to acknowledge the command and then obey. They all began to rise higher and higher as if they were being pulled up the kitchen sink drainpipe by their hair, though it didn’t hurt a bit. They jutted gracefully back and forth to the left and right a couple of times as they rose, until they reached the top and were deposited on a platform of sorts next to what might be a wall.
“Here we are, Sir Renath, open up, please!” Again there was a little quiver of respect and acknowledgment, and a path opened for them through the wall and into “Sir Raneth,” which was apparently the name of the chamber before them. They entered a long, fairly narrow enclosure that grew narrower and narrower until it reached what almost seemed to be a point on the other end. Inside this elongated cone-shaped space, they noticed a woody moist smell in the atmosphere as they walked forward on a spongy surface between four long, porous tubelike structures that protruded from the wall they had just come through. There were two tubes — one low and one higher — on either side of them. These were parallel to the floor and reached quite far across the length of the room.
“Hello there, Microspangoria — oh bother, that’s not quite the right word but it will have to do. Hello there!” Mr. Keeze greeted the tubes with enthusiasm. As he led the Faultsoms along between them, the “Microspangorias” wiggled their own greeting back. He continued, “Tell our friends what you’re up to.”
At that, the family began to hear vocal sounds, but no other person was talking. The Faultsoms peppered each other with questions and comments as they tried to figure out what they were hearing.
“Hey, cool, did you hear that?” Constance asked.
“Chance, Chief, was that either of you?” Dad inquired.
“Nope, not uth!” Chief answered
“But we are hearing voices!” Faye remarked excitedly.
“Ssshhh!” Frank said.
“Listen!” Constance whispered.
The family heard four distinct voices coming from the four Microspangoria tubes beside them.
“Tap tap tap, tap pe tum, tap tap tap pe tum. We are covered with Tap tap tap, tap pe tum, tap tap tap pe tum,” came from one of the tubes over and over again as if it were playing a little hand drum.
“Dip dip dip lo—id dip dip dip lo—id dippy dippy dip dip lo— ids! Inside us there is Dip dip dip lo—id dip dip dip lo—id dippy dippy dip dip lo—ids,” a deeper voice intoned in a rich bass sound.
“Phytesporephytesporephytesporephytesporesphyte…”
“Ioioioioioioimeioioioioioemeiosisssssssssssssss…” came the melodies from the other tubes.
The voices spoke to one another, well, no…they vocalized together, creating a melodic rhythm that inspired each of the visitors to tap their toes and sway back and forth slightly to the odd but catchy groove they were hearing.
Charleston found himself humming a little melody over the top of this, and Chief began to stomp his foot as Chance eyed the enclosure for something to beat on like a hadn drum. The others joined in the melody as they felt the force of the rhythm rise around them. It seemed to be building to a conclusion. Which in fact it did, as one by one, starting from the bottom up, the Microspangorias each emitted a tone forming a single chord in harmony. The tubes wavered at different frequencies, but the effect was a four-note chord so full and unified that it vibrated powerfully through them. Every cell in their bodies seemed to hum with an energy that f
ully awakened their senses. Faye wished she had a sound like this at home with which she could awaken slumberous Constance and Chance, both of whom could easily to hibernate far into any day.
The Faultsoms stood enthralled in the center of the sound as it swelled in and around them until, at last, the tubes all sang one thing together.
“Sporosporosporosporo—polllllllllennninnnn!”
“Ah, that’s the sound of the Dartets…no, no that’s not it. Ah…the Tetrads. They have arrived! Yes, the Tetrads!” Mr. Keeze exclaimed.
“Sporosporosporosporopolllllllllennninnnn!” came a hushed whisper from the tubes.
At this point the family realized that inside those peculiar tubes, strange and remarkable developments had been taking place. Now, little woolly balls were becoming visible, covering the tubes as they grew fuzzier by the second. They were sunny-orange fellows who were talking feverishly among themselves as they expanded in size and number to cover the Microspangoria tubes entirely.
“Hey, Ho there, brothers!”
“Here we are!”
“Ever the eager explorers, aren’t we?”
“Don’t crowd now. Make room — make room for one another,” came a riot of voices.
“Ready to go? Ready to go?”
“Can’t wait to make the trip!”
“It’s the best part about being us…except for the fun of deploying and then, of course there’s the Downing and Digging!”
“Yes! Indeed!” blathered the fuzzy little chaps.
“My natty little Llopens!” Mr. Keeze cried. “You are the rakish fellows, aren’t you? You’re quite richepp, ah — chipper today, I’d say!” Mr. Keeze was barely able to contain his own amusement and clearly unable to contain theirs, even as they acknowledged him in waves of wee wiggles and quivers.
As the Faultsoms watched in fascination, the “Llopens,” as Mr. Keeze called the lint balls, kept multiplying, becoming puffier and fluffier, and more and more yellow, and more and more frenzied as they covered the Microspangoria tubes. When it seemed that not another little fuzzball would fit onto another one of the four tubes, Charleston and Constance began to notice that they were getting itchy all over. It was becoming, well, just plain torture. Soon they felt like they would jump out of their skins. Their eyes were irritated and their tear ducts were brimming with water like the crest of the Niagara Falls!
“Mom, my skin is becoming so irritated. It’s almost unbearable!” Charleston cried.
“Dad, everything is soooo itchy! My eyes are gushing! What is this, ?!!” yelled Constance.
“What’s happening? Mom, Dad, help!” They both began to panic and cry, as Faye and Frank tried to help. Just when the kids both thought they’d explode with hysterics from scratching as they burst into typhoons of watery sneezing, the family heard a screeching, rubbery, stretching sound above them that was growing increasingly intense.
Scccrreeeecchhhh! Zzzcchhhhheeeekkkkksh! The sounds were ear-piercing and quite unnerving like metal being dragged over concrete. The Faultsoms covered their ears and huddled together as the sounds grew more and more intolerable. At the peak of the screeching, Sir Raneth’s chamber ceiling ripped open lengthwise from one end to the other.
Suddenly they were staring up at a brilliant expanse of blue, engulfing them in an awe that almost ripped the air out of their lungs, as they instantly felt like the miniscule specs that, in fact, they were.
“Amazlings! Take hold!” shouted Mr. Keeze, “Grab on to a Llopen…we must be off!”
Without another word, Mr. Keeze reached out to one of the eager little Llopen frizzies that was closest to him. When he touched it, he disappeared instantly, leaving the Faultsom family quite startled, staring up at an immense swath of blue, surrounded by supercharged Llopens on all sides and wondering what to do next.
“Well, everyone, what now?” Frank puzzled.
“We gotta go. Mr. Keeze ith gone and he thaid we have to be off!” Chief insisted.
“I think he means for us to follow him somehow,” Charleston offered, as he wiped his eyes and nose on his sleeve. Both he and Constance were starting to feel less itchy and sneezy now that fresh air was moving around them.
“He told us to grab onto the Llopens — but they are so small and we are so big.” Constance added, sniffling.
“It doesn’t seem possible, but maybe we should try.” Faye suggested.
The family could feel fresh wisps of air blowing around them as the Llopens continued to puff up on all sides. It was a real relief that Charleston and Constance were, indeed, recovering — suddenly immune to whatever it was that had been so terribly vexatious and irritating to them. But, it was clear that the family had a decision to make, and fast! What were they going to do next?
“Come on, let’s see what happens when we touch the Llopens!” Chance piped up.
The family agreed hesitantly, but before Frank could give the go-ahead, Chief, wanting to be first to follow Mr. Keeze, reached out to touch a patch of yellow fluff that was on the Microspangoria closest to him. Immediately, he disappeared from sight!
“Hey!! Now thith futhball ith way bigger ’n’ me!” he chirped. It was true. Chief had shrunk in size and the Llopen, whose fuzz he had reached out to touch, was enormous.
“Chief! Chief, where are you?” Frank and Faye cried out.
“Wight here, Ma and Pa!” Chief screamed as loud as he could. “I’m wight here…look! Wight nexth to you!”
Faye and Frank could hear a teeny little squeaking sound that somehow seemed familiar.
“Hey, that’s Chief ’s voice!” Charleston discerned, with his sensitive musician’s ears.
“Yeah, ith’s me! Grab a Llopen!” shouted the pip-squeaky voice.
“I guess we’d better do it, guys,” Frank ventured apprehensively. “We need to figure out what happened to your little brother and catch up with Mr. Keeze, and I don’t see another way to move forward from here.”
Constance, Charleston, and Chance, along with Faye and Frank, reached out into the mass of yellow fluff on the Microspangoria tube nearest to them. In doing so, one by one, the Faultsoms popped out of sight, becoming teensy-weensy. The Llopens were now the size of elephants compared to the size of the Faultsoms.
“Oooh, gross…this Llopen thing…is huge and it’s really icky!” Constance squealed.
“Fascinating,” Charleston mused. “It seems that we have diminished in size considerably. I, for one, am dwarfed by this creature and it is quite…quite viscous. I am holding on to the Llopen, but it appears that, in truth, the Llopen is adhering to me!”
“Yeah, it’s sticky! I feel like I’m covered in orange cotton candy!” Chance observed.
“Is everyone here? Is everyone okay?” Frank shouted. Frank himself was shrunken and covered in a gummy yellow substance, but had survived. He could only hope that his family was safe, even though he couldn’t see them.
“At last, friends! You’ve got the hang of it now…”
They could just make out the voice of Mr. Keeze as he shouted out to them. “Standby! My fa—vor—ite part of the job this is!”
Just then, the zippy Llopens became all the more wiggly and excitable as anticipation filled the atmosphere. At the same time, Faye and Constance noticed an intoxicating fragrance swirling around them.
“Oh my!” exclaimed Faye…this fragrance is…heavenly!”
“I’ve never smelled anything like it before!” Constance marveled. Now they all could smell it.
“Wow, I’m feeling dizzy!” Frank said.
“It’s almost overpowering.” Charleston stated.
“Trippy!” Chance said as his sucked in more of the sweet smell through his nostrils.
“I jutht want to curl up in thith thmell and float away…”
Chief was drifting off. In fact they were all starting to become lightheaded and loopy.
“Now, now, Amazings,” Mr. Keeze broke in. “Keep your wits about you. We must be at the ready, for the Scent has been Sent.” He
laughed to himself with no small amount of glee. “Yes, the signal has been released and the Llopinators are coming! They are coming for Tenarc. Crazy for it, pining for it, mad for it, they are! Be alert!”
“Cheeze Whiz, I wish this guy would speak English,” Constance muttered to herself. “I have no idea what he is talking about! ‘Enmast — Raneth — Microspangoria — Llopens?’ So weird! And what the heck is ‘Tenarc?!’ Now I’m stuck here covered in yellow goo, waiting for some sort of Llopenmonsters or whatever he called them. Accchh!” Constance was most perturbed.
One might suspect that each of the family members shared these feelings, but everything was happening so quickly there wasn’t time to sort it all out, much less complain or truly worry. All they knew was that being in Wonder consumed their full attention, and now they were infinitesimally small and quite sticky.
Then they heard a very fast whoop, whoop, whoop, whooping — a kind of whirring sound, and whatever it was, it was definitely getting louder and closer.
Then came the excited voice of Mr. Keeze shouting at the top of his shrunken-down lungs: “Here they come, my ginazam drenifs, I mean, my amazing friends! Incoming Llopinators ahead!”
From a distance, a growing darkness descended over them and their thoughts were drowned out by a deafening noise. It was as if a cyclone it was about to hit. As it neared, they were thrashed about in powerful gusts of wind.
They caught sight of a gargantuan brownish-black thing flying toward them. There was a flash of yellow overhead as the Faultsoms ducked deep inside their Llopens, hoping to shield themselves from the overwhelming approach of whatever these things were. That is, everyone ducked inside except for Chance who, for all the world, would not have missed the danger and thrill that accompanied their arrival. To him the “Llopinators” were like living helicopters, but then, he was so small compared to their scope and size that it was impossible to get any real sense of what they actually looked like or how they functioned.
The roar of the whirlwind above them began to quiet and they sat buried in their Llopens under the dark cloud of one of the landing Llopinators, peeping out and trying to get a look at who or what it was.
Mrs. Amazing and the Seed Page 6