I reached out for him. Nothing. I looked frantically around the room for the face but I was alone. I forgot where I was because I needed to be beside him. Whoever he was. I smiled to myself.
I glanced around the room to remember where I was. The wall in front of me was ruby red. I was quickly reminded that the light I saw in my dream might have just been a mimic of this room. Then it hit me. Where was I? Nothing seemed to make sense in this moment. Why was I here and not at home? I froze in place as I tried to rack my brain of a familiar room or face. There was none. What was my home? And a better question, where was home? The only face I could seem to comprehend was the boy from my dream. I felt my breath catch as I realized that I had no answers. I could only sense that this mysterious boy was important to me.
I took in deep breaths. I spoke quietly to myself. “Okay. What is your name?” The simplest question to ask yourself and I was falling short. This is the first thing we ask someone we have just met. I didn’t even have the answer to that. The first thing we notice about someone we just met is their gender and then we learn their name. I had the gender down but what was my name?
I moved my hands stiffly to my hair. My hair didn’t feel ratty, even though I just had a restless sleep. I smiled as I felt the softness through my fingertips, but it froze on my lips. There was a soft cracking within my hands that didn’t seem natural. I lifted my palm up to my face. I examined it ever so slightly and closely. I saw nothing but a hand, smooth and white as ever. There was nothing out of the ordinary. My dream was really getting to me. I put my palm to my forehead and quickly removed it when I felt an icy coldness erupting from my hand. I shivered in confusion but resided to putting it to my side. Out of sight and out of mind.
I lifted my eyes to assess the room more. An old, bright red jukebox stood before me. Its spotless tinted glass was brightening up the room. I jumped up to play a song, smiling eagerly. I lifted my leg from the bed, only to feel a snag and tightness around my ankle. I peered down and groaned in frustration when I realized I was rooted to the spot. A rope was fastened to my foot, to hold me in place. As if I were a prisoner. Panic grew over me as I struggled to remove my ankle from the bedpost.
I tugged and pulled and felt miserably hopeless until a new emotion came over me. I felt crazed. It was powerful and hot but a fury raged on inside me. I didn’t understand this anger but it took over my insides. The rage inside me felt as if there was a large bowl of hot cement being poured over my skull. Hot and fierce, I wanted answers and I wanted them now. What was keeping me trapped in this bed? I didn’t know but the fire within me was soaring down through my bones, tapping each of my bones until I jumped again with wrath. When I leaped up, the sheets beneath me dissolved and left a black scorch mark in its wake. I gasped as I threw myself to the ground from shock. I touched my leg to see where the fire came from. Was I burning and didn’t even know it?
My leg was perfectly fine and intact. I shook with fear as I stared up at the music player. Confused and scared, I felt like weeping, but no tears fell this time. I was a mess inside and I knew it. I stood lightly and shook my nightgown for any shocks of smoke or scorch. I stared intently at the player.
I screeched in surprise as the music player engulfed in flames. I shouted for help but my concentration was completely on the music player before me. I tried to peer away but my eyes were locked with the player. It was as if my eyes would not break from its view. I shouted louder and finally tore my eyes from it. The corner of my eye caught sight of the flames diminishing. I had just caused a fire, I think. I shivered with fear.
I felt the world spinning around me as I walked back to my bed. I sat down afraid and alone. I gulped at the sight of the rope tied around my bed. I lifted it up to my face and gasped at what I saw. There was scorch marks along the loops. Traces of blood lined the strands.
I yanked as lightly as I could on the rope to free the rope from the bedpost it was wrapped around. The light jerk ripped the banister from my bed and I fell with a plop to the floor. I stood up slowly, registering what I had just done, but my body didn’t seem like it was my own. I wobbled forward to the mirror.
As soon as I looked into the mirror, I was brought back in time to rotting around my eyes. I shook my head feverishly at the memory or maybe a foreign dream. What was happening to me? Who was I? I was just afraid.
I looked back at an alien face. She was too beautiful to be me. She had deep green eyes and flowing hazelnut brown hair, which were curled in perfect ringlets that seemed impossible since I hadn’t fixed my hair since I woke up. I caught sight in the mirror of my arm. I ran my fingers over the arm and felt a slight bump. I stared down to it and frowned. There was something so familiar about it. There was something about it that made me squirm. The world before me was a mess. Wasn’t it? I remembered travesties on earth before I was locked away.
There was something and I couldn’t put my finger on it; something the world was fighting right outside my walls. The disease. I huffed. This was it; the world was fighting a disease. I had to help them. I felt my head feeling woozy.
I decided I would start my day. Whatever that even meant for me. I walked around the foreign room and couldn’t find a trace of clothing. I felt my mouth going dry and decided to do something about my hair. I wanted it away from my face. I faced the mirror once more. I luckily had a ponytail holder.
As I attempted to put my hair up, the room seemed to spin. I felt myself losing grip. I clung to the sides of the dresser and I looked up at the mirror. Was I having a panic attack of some type? I caught sight of my eyes before I felt myself giving out. My eyes were burning a shade of emerald green and I was gone.
***
Wind whipped through my hair as I caught sight of the ground. The ground? It didn’t look anything like the ground. There were pools of red all around. Maybe I was up too high and I didn’t know why I was up this high either. I willed myself to see the red closer and before I knew it, I was sinking down to touch the ground. I must be dreaming because I appeared to be flying. And since this was a dream, I could do anything I wanted to do. I smiled as I glided by some odd force and reached the ground ever so lightly.
I dropped my hand down but pulled my hand quickly away as I felt the warmth of the red liquid and the smell of something toxic. Blood. It was blood. I shook my hand frenziedly and wished I had a napkin to get rid of the disgusting bile I got on my hands. I wanted to stop but something kept me going. I continued to soar, pulling myself upward, away from the blood. I searched for anything that reminded me of normalcy or the normalcy that my head allowed me to remember.
Green. I was searching for green; green trees or even green grass. To my dismay, I saw none. My mind must have been playing some cruel trick; there was nothing normal to see. Green probably wasn’t even the correct color to search for. I scolded my mind internally for making me feel like I could remember something at all. All around me was darkness. Crimson, murky, obscure and auburn colors filled my features. The treetops were wilted and brown, disguising any green among their trimmings. The grass was deep black as if the sun scorched it. The sun was not out but the moon was in the sky. I pictured a beautiful scene, one with a white as snow moon, but this moon was different. The moon was cerise as if it had picked up the death and blood in the world and rolled it up to the sky to shine brightly at night.
I took a deep breath in through my nose while trying to regain some composure. The air was too sweet for me. I cringed slightly at the fact that it didn’t fill me with relief, but it instead seemed to put a restraint on my lungs. There was a pressure there and I exhaled quickly. Something else was off, there was something called fresh air. It came to my mind quickly but I realized in this moment, that this air was not fresh. It was polluted with blood and casualty. The smell was bitter, it burned my nose and I held my breath with ease as to not smell it anymore. My mind wouldn’t let me forget though.
The smell of burning leaves used to be my favorite scent, my darkened memory told me, b
ut this burnt smell was nothing like this. The smell of burning of flesh and blood was something we must be born with. What I mean by this is that I think I was born with the innate sense to know what blood was, the taste, texture and, most of all, the smell. I didn’t have to know that there was death and carnage all below me. Many people had died here.
I lowered myself so the trees touched my fingertips. I caught vision of a lake and rocketed over to it. I gazed into the running water. Ripples were cast through it and I smiled as I felt the breeze it presented. Now this was something that fresh air was supposed to be. It masked the scent of the air and I could almost forget what was wrong with the world. I wanted to rest and play in the water but then I saw myself. I realized that I was flying, without any help at all. I was flying by my own accord. My dream was treating me right because I was a goddess roaming through the air. I moved closer to touch the lake but as I drew near, I felt heat radiating from it. This was not normal. I grasped my hand tightly and willed myself to stop but I could not. I held my hand out in front of me to get a better look.
Red welts appeared over the surface of my pale hand. I couldn’t touch water. I looked longingly at it. I stared at my reflection once more and discovered that the only thing on my back were clothes that I didn’t remember slipping on.
That’s when my body began to glow. The light shined and illuminated my face. It reminded me of my dream earlier. This time the light wasn’t red but green. I thought maybe someone was behind me, shinning a light on me and I looked behind me quickly to see who the trespasser was but I was alone.
My eyes glazed over as I heard voices speaking to me. We need you now. The voice said to me softly. I was oddly unafraid. An image of a boy passed over my eyes. His face was familiar and it brought bile to my throat as I saw him, but that feeling quickly diminished. Voices spoke softly to me, and I listened as best as I could. They were nothing but a whisper.
I felt myself being steered in a different direction but I couldn’t see. My eyes were no longer working. I thrashed in the air, and pulled at my face, but it was no use. There was only darkness and it kept me from seeing my direction. I couldn’t tell where I was going but the voices kept telling me it was okay. I was meeting Joseph for the next plan and that was all I knew.
Joseph was someone I trusted. I had immense respect for him. Though it didn’t feel genuine. My first feeling when I thought of him had been hatred. My mind quickly dismissed this negative thought. I glided back into the air and I finally regained sight to see my destination below the trees.
I reached a house that had boards lining its windows. The house was jet black and had a gate that lined its entire perimeter. I felt scared as I saw “Freaks” written along the house but I kept my pace up towards the abandoned house and landed swiftly behind the gate. I knew exactly what to do from some unspoken bond between the voices and me.
I entered the house without turning the knob. The door quickly opened for me, and I walked towards a room where many people stood. The only light in the room was a candle burning in the corner. In the center was an older man in a white uniform; a doctor’s uniform. My mind flashed to a younger face, one with no wrinkles and softer eyes although his jaw was severe and square, that looked just like his. In that moment, I felt myself smiling. I didn’t know why I felt so attached to that face that I flashed to.
As I entered the room, the boy named Joseph raised his arm. All were silenced, and I tried to open my mouth to take a breath but realized my mouth was suddenly inoperable to open. I moved my hand to my mouth. Nothing was there and then my hands were pulled to the side. No one touched me though. It was as if there was some control over my body. I panicked and looked around with alarmed eyes. There were few gazes that I caught that were the same, but many were serene as ever.
The doctor spoke up and I immediately felt relieved, it was as if he reached inside me and switched my attention to only him, calming my fears in the process. He was the only thing that mattered to me in this moment. “We all know why we’re here. Well most of us.” He shot me a quick guarded glance, I wanted to reciprocate, but I was locked in place. My eyes were glued to him and I felt it impossible to even manage a blink. “I have selected the best of the best to come and capture some of my friends. Some of my “friends,” what I mean by that is that they are my sworn enemies.” Pictures flashed before my mind.
I did not know where they came from but they appeared for half a second. In that second, I had already registered exactly what they looked like from their height to their shoe size. A lump of a boy with glasses and dark hair appeared from behind my eyes as well as a picturesque girl with strawberry blonde hair. My heart ached for them but I didn’t know why. I didn’t know them and they didn’t know me. “These are our top enemies, along with someone else. But we will save that one for last.” He shot a glance over to Joseph and beamed. “Only the most worthy may capture our villain. The worthy will be prized exceedingly and will then be put in charge of things the way Joseph has earned his spot.”
Shouts erupted all around me and I felt the ability of my mouth slowly coming back. I opened and closed my jaw in angst, as I hated to feel so out of control. “I want him,” what appeared to be hundreds of people, shouted beside me. I watched as men brawled against one another about who was the strongest and the bravest to receive such an honor. Soon punches were being thrown because they wanted this unmasked enemy. I couldn’t help but wonder what these people did to deserve this immense hatred. Everyone around me was violently angry, but I didn’t feel this way towards him or her. I was overcome by the feeling that I didn’t quite fit in here.
“Silence.” He said it as a whisper but it rang in my ear as if he were right beside me. Again, my eyes went fuzzy and I viewed our two enemies again.
“Our newest members may be confused so I shall explain.” The doctor spoke again in a whisper. He felt so close by that I shivered slightly and reached up to grab my arms and give myself a tight hug, but the blind force kept my arms to my side. “My name is Doctor Ravana. You recently were near the brink of death but I presume you have forgotten, for I have made you better. Just look around you. Well that is, when you can.” He added, which showed me he was in control of my mobile movements somehow. “We are the best of the shit outside of these walls. We are the mightiest and we will be the rulers of the world. I mean it when I say we are the cure.” He screamed as he smiled in triumph but I was still lost in this situation. What were we exactly? As if he heard my thoughts, he answered. “Some of you don’t understand but I have been sent here to this earth to you to protect you, to save you and in turn, you will be the protectors of the world.” He hesitated for a minute and I wondered if he were thinking too hard because his face looked strained.
“You will be the main protector of me. As the Greek Gods used the humans as toys, I will use you as protectors and in turn, I give you shelter, I give you love, I give you riches, I give you anything you desire and that is justly the truth. You will rid the world of the bad and the evil and I just guide you to the evil, to destroy the evil that is. For example, this fellow here,” he flashed to the chubby boy,” is trying to destroy you and all you hold dear. He wants to make sure he destroys every single one of you and why?” He paused for dramatic effect. “Because you have all the weapons. I have given all of you the weapons to destroy, to kill but ultimately to protect those weak and fragile.” He stopped talking as he peered down at me. I trembled but stared back with a fierceness I didn’t know I had.
“It is your job to find those sick and dying, and bring them to me. Or to the hospital but by bringing them to me, we are getting more bands of followers. We will guide them to protection and to be the protectors of the world like so many of you are right now. I want this man.” The chunky boy appeared again. “I want him brought to me directly. I will reward the first to do it. The girl can wait, but this boy is of vital importance as I once mentioned before. Whoever brings this boy to me, will be able to avenge me when I make you
search for the final target. My final target contains the highest reward. In the meantime, seek out the weak, the poor, the hungry, and the sick and bring them to me to provide them with help. I will give them their powers and then we gain our followers. Soon the world will be rid of sickness and evil.”
I felt my gaze give way again and I looked around in shock. Everyone was shouting and yelling. I was no protector, I was just- Wait, who was I? I still had no idea. I looked down at my feet. High heels, a bright red were there and I wore a flowing black shirt with blue jeans. I didn’t know who I was. I threw my hand up to my forehead and felt the strange coldness again. What was going on? This was a dream that I would wake from. I just had to wake myself up.
I wasn’t forced to gaze up again but I listened intently, my palm still against me. “We must find these three people and destroy them. Their leader, whom is nameless right now, and themselves, created the disease that almost destroyed you. We have to protect others from it and if we can’t, they must become us. They must be protectors too. I have appointed you each someone sick to rescue and remember if you see either one of the mongrels, then bring them to me as well.” Screams broke out again in agreement. “Shall we?” he screeched to them. I stared up to him once more. I was mesmerized by the way the room was affected by his simple words. I realized, that I did not have an image of a sick patient to obtain, but maybe I would receive it later.
Fists were in the air and I shook my head deeply, but before I knew it, a young man was beside me, nudging me in the side before I finally raised my arm. I smiled to the boy but his eyes were glazed over and glowing. I looked on in shock, he didn’t know who he was. He didn’t know anything. I searched the room, but all eyes were glowing and glazed over. I realized, my eyes must be emerald as well, I didn’t feel myself losing grip as I had when they turned emerald in my room.
“Miss.” Someone whispered in my ear. I hopped a little in place when I felt someone near me. I looked over to see who it was. It was Joseph. I should have felt relief but I felt something different.
Antidote Trilogy: The Complete Box Set Page 19