Inconvenient Relations

by Simi K. Rao

  Oh god! My poor Shaan!

  “I don’t want to transgress on your authority, Rich, but even though my husband is indifferent right now, I know he’ll be completely broken-hearted if he is not there in the thick of things doing what he loves…and I’ll never be able to forgive myself.” Her guilt was weighing her down.

  “Yes. I haven’t seen Shaan so enthused before.”

  “So for my sake… No, for his sake, can you put in a word? Seeing that, you know him so well and have right from the start? Please? I’m sure your opinion carries a lot of weight,” she implored, feeling helpless in the bargain.

  After looking at her, Rich arrived at a decision. “Can’t promise, but I’ll give it my best shot.”

  He then beamed. “Now go, run to your beau. I don’t fancy him holding me up at gunpoint anytime!”

  ***

  Are you having an affair? I’m pretty sure you are!

  Ruhi smiled indulgently; it’d been barely a few minutes past the hour when her phone alerted her to his message.

  “Yes, I am,” she said before racing back as though her life depended on it.

  She found him prostrate on the living room couch, his eyes closed, with the book The Consolations of Philosophy opened to the chapter “A Broken Heart” lying near his outstretched arm on the floor.

  “You don’t need this stuff anymore,” she chided, replacing the book on the coffee table before cuddling against him.

  He smiled, eyes still shut, as she pecked him on the tip of his nose. “So who are you having an affair with, care to clue me in?

  “With you of course—a most wonderful never-ending affair.”

  “Hmm…then I have no complaints,” he said, folding her securely in his arms.

  Venus

  “I’m going to sit right here! You go on!”

  “Please yourself. Don’t think I’m going to offer you any assistance, sweetheart. Anyways, it was your brainy idea to hike nine miles down the Grand Canyon in this bloody heat!”

  Shaan glanced up the narrow dusty trail. She was sitting like a stubborn oaf on a rock, which projected dangerously over the edge. Her hardheadedness persisted even during the worst of circumstances. She wasn’t willing to give up and ask for help.

  Agreed, he was not feeling so hot himself yet was determined to finish the remaining half mile or so because down there was the river, cool air, and rest!

  How can I be such a stupid fool to abide by her every single word even when it borders sometimes on the ridiculous? I must’ve truly gone bonkers! Love has to have its limits!

  Had it been just yesterday? For he had lost track of time.

  ***

  Yesterday, in the cozy Ahuja digs…

  “CNN reports that the Republican primaries are almost wrapped up, but none of the candidates are willing to throw in the gauntlet.”

  “No, Shaan can’t call it quits so easily. I won’t let him!” Flipping through the channels, Ruhi paused on the Cartoon Network, considering it a safe bet.

  But alas, the animated creatures appeared far more treacherous and vengeful than those in real life.

  “Gosh! Plots, subplots, twists, turns… Can nothing in this world be straightforward and simple?”

  She glanced nervously at the clock; it was thirty minutes past eleven.

  He’s been gone exactly four hours and not a whisper—good or bad. Is he angry with me? Ruhi asked herself. He’s likely livid at the way I shoved him out this morning, probably thinks I’m frigid trying to avoid his advances at all costs. But he doesn’t know what I’m going through, and I can’t tell him either. This is so insane!

  Then just as she was about to call his number, she heard the key turn in the lock.

  She sat up straight, holding her breath.Why is he taking so long? Does he not realize how desperate I am?

  Slow measured steps, the painstaking ritual of removing his shoes and stacking them on the rack; that’d mean good news, but it could be bad, too! Oh Lord!

  She wanted to holler, Shaan, just leave them be…just tell me you’re still in.

  His demeanor did nothing to allay her fears either when he shuffled in with his shoulders slouched, a morose and somber look on his face, and slumped on the couch.

  Unable to bear the suspense any longer, she broke her peace, “What happened? Aren’t you back on board? How could anyone be so mean?”

  He turned to her and she was surprised to see a beautific smile. “You love me a lot, don’t you, Ruhi?” he asked softly.

  She frowned, baffled.

  Grasping her hand in one of his, he gently massaged her knuckles while placing another on the small of her back. “You went to meet with Rich last night to plead on my behalf, and you kept it from me so I wouldn’t feel embarrassed?”

  “No, I didn’t. I just wanted to tell him to give you what was rightfully yours…nothing else.”

  A thumb traced her jawline. “Poor baby, worrying yourself sick about me when you needn’t have worried at all.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, trying to stay immune to the sensual feel of his fingers on her skin.

  “My foolish wife. Though your husband’s love for you has reached insane proportions, he isn’t utterly stupid. But if things continue like this, that day may not be too far off, either.”

  She blushed. “Stop beating around the bush and tell me why should I think you are so clever!”

  He laughed. “Did Rich talk about one of my designs being considered for the final module?”

  “Yes, but he said it was still being tested.”

  “It has passed the prelims but has to go through a series of more rigorous trials where it’ll be put through all kinds of adverse conditions, which it may encounter in space—extremes of heat, cold, trauma from asteroids, space junk, and perhaps even aliens!” His eyes grew wide.

  She laughed. “Don’t mess with me.”

  “I’m not.” He jerked her closer.

  She pursed her lips to keep them from trembling. “So, what is preventing them from using your work in your absense?”

  “Hmm…your mind works in devious ways, and I love that!” His fingers tracked up her spine, into her scalp, and he smiled wickedly when she shuddered yet resolutely held his gaze.

  “First of all, to find someone else in my narrow field of expertise and at such short notice is close to impossible.”

  “But if they do…then what?”

  He nodded. “They very well might, you are right, but I doubt they will go through the trouble.”

  “Why would you think so?” She bent forward, all excited.

  He chuckled. “It isn’t as simple as it seems. They may confiscate my work, but what if something goes wrong, who will fix it? Yes, they are all equally good, but as the inventor, I’m the only one who knows the circuits inside and out, and they cannot afford to waste time on the contraption when it’s hurtling toward its destination or collecting data on the planet. Time is precious, and precision is vital leaving little room for error. They’ll look like fools if the bloody thing choked up!” He shrugged his shoulders, “So you see, they do need me.”

  “But, are you sure? I don’t want you to end up discouraged and disappointed,” she said, looking anxious again.

  “Yes, there are no guarantees, but it was a gamble I was willing to take because there’s no way I could let you go, could I?” He pulled her onto his lap. “‘Cause without you my life holds no meaning—those planets are just pieces of rock!”

  He was then witness to untold happiness that shone through her luminous eyes.

  “So when I went in today, I was stunned to see on my desk a summons for interrogation. These guys work fast, and of course, you helped speed the process along. I was wanted by the Gestapos!”

  “Gestapos?”

  He guffawed. “Our company’s
indigenous CIA, FBI, Mossad, SS all rolled into one! Not a soul can move an inch without their prior approval, and of course, my transatlantic hop earned me a two-hour special.”

  “You deserved it!” She laughed, noticing her anxiety dissipate considerably.

  “Hmphh! I did? Guess so for chasing after you,who wouldn’t?”

  “All right, I apologize,” she said, roughing his hair. “Go on please.”

  A smile flickered across his face. “But they couldn’t faze me one bit ‘cause I had nothing to hide. I confessed that though my wife has driven me incurably insane, I just can’t imagine surviving without her. She’s my dream, my fantasy, my unrealized desire.”

  “Will you stop that,” she exclaimed though her heart craved more.

  “It’s the truth, and Rich corroborated it when I met him, that I’m one hell of a lucky SOB!”

  “You seem very confident,” she mumured. Her fingers floated down his throat, defining the strong muscles as well as the prominent bump in the middle, unconscious of the havoc they were creating.

  He swallowed, his voice becoming hoarse. “I am, quite. In fact, one of those clowns even shook my hand…besides, Rich said it looked pretty positive.”

  “So will you be going to work tomorrow?”

  “Probably not. I cannot officially be on the team till they clear me. Furthermore, there’s no other work going on, so I guess till I hear of my fate” —letting out a languid sigh— “I am at your disposal, m’lady, to do as you please.”

  “To do as I please?” she echoed, turning scarlet when she discerned herself being systematically stripped under his gaze.

  “What did you say?” he asked, distracted, while fiddling with her silver hoops.

  “If you have some time off, can I make a request?” she appealed, grabbing his hand as it slipped under her skirt.

  His face darkened. “Request away…but please don’t declare you intend to remain a virgin the rest of your life—that’ll just kill me!” His teeth nipped the edge of her earlobe while she struggled in his grasp.

  “I want us to go to a place that’s special, both for you and for me.”

  ***

  Somewhere on the South Kaibob trail in Grand Canyon National Park.

  Shaan had stopped keeping track of their progress; he was just satisfied being able to place one foot in front of the other.

  Yes, that was yesterday, and here we are—hot, tired, sweaty with not an ounce of romance in sight! And she is back to doing what she does best—irritating me! But I’m not going to lose my cool. I’ll remain unaffected. He thought as he stood glowering at her; he wasn’t going to yield another inch.

  “Hey, bud!” One of their group’s professional guides came pounding up the trail. “What’s up with you folks? You’re holding up the rest of the group,” he said in a breezy tone. He was Andy, the son in the father-son group who conducted these tours on a daily basis. He flashed a blinding smile, his pearly whites contrasting brilliantly against his nut-brown skin—a Greek god in shorts and, to make matters worse, yet to break a sweat.

  His eyes lighted on Ruhi, and he clambered up to her. “Do you need some help, miss?”

  She smiled. “No, thank you. I think I’m okay now.”

  Yet as soon as she stood up, she winced and stumbled, falling against him.

  “Seems like you may have blisters. I can give you a hitch to the bottom where we can check your feet,” he proposed, throwing an arm around her back.

  “No you don’t. I can take care of her,” Shaan snapped, coming up and tersely shouldering Andy away. “She’s my wife.”

  “Suit yourself. Was just trying to speed things up, need to set up camp before nightfall.” Andy shrugged and soon disappeared around a sharp outcrop of rock.

  “I don’t need your help!” Ruhi emphatically refused Shaan’s hand.

  “But you were willing to lean on that, that—”

  “He understood my pain, you don’t!”

  “Like hell I don’t! You are playing with me and that’s that!”

  “So then I am. Now just leave me alone,” she said, resolutely marching away from him, and though her feet began to complain right away, she continued on with her teeth clenched.

  “Whatever you are doing, I don’t want to be labeled as a heartless brute who can’t take care of his wife!”

  She gasped when he swung her up. “Don’t struggle or I won’t hesitate to throw you off right now,” he threatened menacingly, standing precariously close to the edge. The roar of the rushing waters of the Colorado River could be heard not far below.

  Dainty nostrils flared and dark eyes flashed with injured pride, but she stayed put.

  “That’s much better,” he approved before resuming his stride. Finding her amazingly light in his arms, Shaan was overcome by a sudden incredible tenderness, a need to cherish and protect her innocence. Yet at the same time, he didn’t fail to notice the hint of cleavage revealed by the burgundy camisole that clung seductively to her full breasts under her thin cotton shirt nor the silky smoothness of her toned thighs, which her khaki shorts failed to adequately cover.

  “Why did you stop?”

  “Huh?” He blinked. “Just getting a breather.” Barely was he able to speak, for he felt his heart pounding like a freight train against his rib cage.

  Admit it, boy, the harder you try to resist, the worse the madness gets. Love is indeed limitless.

  As is usually the case, the most awe-inspiring experiences in life chance upon you suddenly and take your breath away.

  The River

  Meandering eternal

  Perennial over miles and miles

  Of barren desert, golden fields and

  Rugged canyon

  From a faint trickle to

  A booming roar

  It contorts, it twists, it rushes

  It flows.

  Moods ever changing

  From a pensive calm

  To a nurturing warmth,

  And a restless fury

  In constant motion

  A persistent quest

  For its ocean

  Where it’s spirit can lay to rest.

  Shaan looked down at his ocean and saw her gazing in wonder at the sight that had made him stop in his tracks. So would it anyone else.

  The massive canyon, several million years in the making, is at any time an awe-inspiring sight; but twilight brings with it a distinct magic, a surreal other world of solitude, peace, and oneness with nature.

  A sudden rush of cool air hit his face, bringing with it the smell of earth, sweaty grime, and a faint yet distinct hint of her fragrance. It knocked him out of his trance.

  Setting her down on the pebble-strewn sandy edge of the river, he unloaded the huge backpack whose straps had made deep inroads into his shoulders. She had stuffed it with all kinds of paraphernalia; things they might need and couldn’t potentially do without on this ridiculous trip.

  He had given in as usual, not realizing he’d be the one doing most of the hauling.

  “Thanks and sorry for causing so much trouble but I thought—”

  “Stop thinking from now on. It’ll do us both a lot of good!” he shot back, squatting on his haunches while trying to stretch his aching spine.

  Almost immediately, he saw her face crumple. She was on the brink of tears.

  “That’s enough, Ruhi! I was foolish to humor you this far! I should have predicted your body would never handle a hike like this, but that’d be going against my nature, wouldn’t it?”

  “I said I’m sorry, didn’t I? And you don’t have to listen to me or do anything for me from now on…understood!” The tears stopped before they started.

  He liked her better this way.

  Watch out! Don’t let her push your buttons!

  “That�
��s marvelous. Now you’ll do exactly as I say.”

  “No way!”

  “Yes way, Ms. Reckless. Here, take these.” He proffered a Snickers bar and a bottle of Gatorade.

  “No, I’m not hungry. I’m going to wash up.” She stood up.

  “Bloody hell! You’ve got to feed yourself and hydrate or you’ll be unconscious before daybreak, and I’m in no mood to take care of a sick wife.”

  “Screw you!” she screamed.

  “Exactly.” He chuckled and was requited when he saw her face turn beet red.

  Without another word, she snatched the bottle from his hand, unscrewed the cap, and chugged down half the contents in one gulp before shoving it inside the pocket of her roomy cargos. Then with a defiant toss of her head, she started hobbling toward the river.

  “That’s a decent start. Just make it a point to smile a little next time and…don’t drink the water!” he hollered after her, but failed to elicit a response.

  ***

  “Wife trouble?” Andy Sr. inquired, loping over on his long legs to lend Shaan a hand after he spied him fiddling halfheartedly with the tent; his mind and eyes were focused on Ruhi who appeared to be treating him to a royal brush-off.

  Taking his silence and dour face as an affirmative, the nimble and sprightly older man burst into a loud guffaw. With his brown eyes twinkling merrily, he clapped the younger man on his shoulder. “Women are man’s eternal affliction! They torture you endlessly, then kill you with a smile.”

  “So? What’s the remedy?”

  The man who looked barely a day over fifty, though he claimed to be all of three score and ten, said in a conspiratorial whisper while wagging a cautionary finger, “There ain’t no remedy, kid. I can vouch from forty-five years of experience. They can live without you, but you’ll die without them, so better get ready to toe the line! Just try not to let her know you are. Now can you figure why I do this crazy hike almost every day?” he asked with a wink.

  Shaan acquiesced with a smile; it felt good to know there were others in this world who shared his kind of misery.