by Jennae Vale
Brenna stayed awake, watching Zeke sleep. She was grateful to him for helping her, but she was also finding that maybe she liked him more than she originally thought. He was a good man. Better by far than any of those who lived here at Castle Treun. Propping herself on one elbow, she used her other hand to tentatively touch his face. She imagined what it might be like to live her life with this man and as she was about to pull her hand away, Zeke’s arm snaked around her and pulled her close. Not sure what to do, Brenna rested her head on his chest and fell asleep to the steady beat of his heart.
Chapter 9
An unusual pressure on his chest woke Zeke at first light. It took a moment for him to acclimate himself to his surroundings and when he did he found Brenna’s head resting peacefully on his chest. He didn’t wish to disturb her, so he lay perfectly still examining the angelic quality sleep brought to her pretty face.
According to sixteenth century law, he was temporarily tied to Brenna for a year and a day. None of that mattered to him. He knew that he could return to his world as soon as he found Sara. He’d help Brenna get settled with her brother and then be on his way.
Brenna stirred and her hand joined her head on his chest, causing other parts of him that had been asleep to awaken. He hadn’t slept with a woman in a long time. Before Helene appeared in his life, Zeke was a happy bachelor, moving from woman to woman and never spending more time with them than was necessary. He knew he had broken a few hearts, but he hadn’t been ready for a long-term relationship. It took Helene to show him that he was. He wouldn’t have to worry about breaking Brenna’s heart. She didn’t much care for him, having made that clear right from the start. She no more wanted to be married to him than he to her. She’d be Dougall’s problem once they reached Breaghacraig. There was absolutely no need to worry about her. Their parting wouldn’t cause a moment of angst for either of them.
Still, he found he liked the feel of her as she lay there next to him. He shifted the arm lodged beneath Brenna’s shoulder and ran his fingers through the silky softness of her hair as he let his nose nuzzle the top of her head. The scent of lavender wafted up to him, tickling his nose with its sweetness.
This is what it would be like to wake up every morning with a wife. There was a certain peace which had settled in him as he lay there. He had no desire to move or to leave this spot. He wondered if he could ever be the kind of husband a woman would want. Would he be a good father? His brain turned to thoughts of his own childhood and to his parents. Memories of them were never good, so he turned his thoughts to his sister and his grandfather, who was no longer living. Sara was all he had. He couldn’t lose her. Once he returned home he decided he’d finally think about settling down. He had a stable life now. A good business that he’d nurtured. He had a place to live and while it wasn’t his, it felt like home. Yes. That is what he would do. He would work on building a foundation for the rest of his life.
Brenna awoke with a start. There was a man in her bed and she was touching him!
“Is everything alright? Did you have a bad dream?” Zeke asked, concern evident in his voice.
“I’m fine. I’m just not used to sharing me bed. I forgot you were here.” She rolled away from him and sat up. “Is this what it’s like to be married?”
“I wouldn’t know, but I imagine it’s a lot more than just sleeping with someone.”
“Aye. Ye’re right.” The thoughts and feelings she was having were very conflicted. Although she enjoyed the feel of Zeke’s chest beneath her cheek and it had caused her to experience an odd sensation in her belly, she was embarrassed to have found herself in such a vulnerable position. She didn’t want Zeke to think she needed him for anything more than her escape from Castle Treun. “We should rise. We can begin our journey to Breaghacraig as soon as we’re ready.”
“What’s your hurry?” Zeke teased. “Are you afraid they’ll make us stay?” A crooked grin lit his face, flustering her and causing her belly to do flip flops.
“Nae. Of course not. Greer will be saddling our horses and packing our bags for us.”
“She really doesn’t like you, does she?”
“Nae. This castle has always been mine to manage. ’Tis my… ’Twas me home.” She hated the fact that she was being driven out of the only home she’d ever known, but she had a new life awaiting her and it was time to say goodbye to this one. “Greer wants to be in charge and having me here has been a threat to her.”
“You could say the same.”
“What do ye mean?”
“I think you were threatened by her presence as well.”
Brenna could feel the anger welling up within her. “How would ye know that? Ye’ve only been here a few days. Ye should nae judge,” she yelled.
“Okay. Okay. Calm down. I wasn’t trying to insult you. It’s just that… Look, I know she’s been pretty awful to you, but I also think you felt as if you’d been replaced and had no value because of it.”
Brenna didn’t speak. He was right, but she wasn’t about to let him know that. She began to get out of the bed, but Zeke grabbed her hand and held her there, rubbing his thumb across it, soothing her, but also stirring something else within her. She gazed at their hands, and felt a warmth that confused her. As Zeke continued to hold her hand, she looked into his eyes and saw sincerity. He really was trying to help her, but why? No one in her life had ever done anything like this for her and it only muddled things all the more in her head.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He looked at her with a funny, sad expression. “Our first fight as a married couple,” he chuckled.
“Aye. I dinnae believe it will be the last.”
“Brenna, I’ll try not to say things that upset you, but I’d appreciate it if you’d tell me when I do instead of being angry with me.”
“Why? We’ll only be together for a few more days and then ye can be or yer way.” She wanted to be angry with him. It would make their time together easier on her. She couldn’t allow herself to have thoughts and feelings about this man that would only hurt her when they parted ways.
“Those few days can be one of two things… heaven or hell. Your choice.”
“Me choice? What do ye mean by that?”
“I mean. You can choose to get along with me or not. I’ve already decided to be more careful with my words, but I’m not perfect.”
He was giving her a choice. She wasn’t used to making decisions for herself. “Alright. I prefer heaven.”
“Good.”
He released her hand and she felt regret that he had. Zeke had touched her with his words and his respect for her. It was best to get out of bed and put some space between them. She had to remember this was only temporary. The best thing she could do right now was ignore the man in her bed. The man who made her feel things she did not want to feel. There was no time to think about that now, though. She had to get her things together so they could be on their way. Zeke stayed in bed and watched her as she gathered the few belongings she wished to take along with her. She paused momentarily as she picked up the doll her aunt had made her. She thought about leaving it behind, but found that she couldn’t. It meant too much to her. It was the only good memory she’d be taking along and so she quickly stuffed it into her bag. When she was done she turned to look at him. He is verra handsome. And unlike her Da, he didn’t seem to yell about everything. She would do her best to be pleasant around him.
“I’m ready to go, but ye are still abed. It seems I’ve married a lazy man,” she teased. Do ye nae need to pack yer belongings?”
“The few belongings I have are ready to go. Watching you buzzing from one end of the room to the other has exhausted me. I think I need to sleep more.” He lay down and put a pillow over his head.
Brenna picked up the other pillow and slammed him with it. He didn’t move. She tried again and this time he threw the pillow off his head and grabbing her wrestled her down to the bed. She wriggled and squirmed beneath him as she became aw
are that something hard and long was poking her in the belly. Both arms were accounted for and it didn’t feel like a leg. She froze in place, gazing up into a chiseled face and soft blue eyes. Those eyes were gazing down into hers with the same intensity she was feeling. Without thinking, Brenna pulled his head down to hers and kissed him right on the lips. She had only an instant to regret it before he kissed her back and kissed her again and again. Kisses so sweet she never wanted them to stop. She was new to kissing, so she followed his lead, doing everything that he did, which seemed to be right, because he seemed to be enjoying it as much as she. She was intrigued by the hard object poking her and her hand made its way between their bodies to feel it.
Breaking away for a moment, she asked, “Does this always happen when you kiss a lass?”
“No. Only if I’m enjoying it,” he said with a low growl. “Brenna, you’ve never done this before?” He seemed surprised, then the kisses moved down her neck to her shoulder.
“Nae. You’re the first man I’ve kissed like this,” she admitted as she turned her head a bit, enjoying those kisses.
“Really! You’re pretty good at it,” he said into her neck.
She was happy to hear this. “I’m simply doing as yer doing.”
“Good plan.” He dipped his head again. Kissing her differently this time. His tongue slipped between her lips and ventured into her mouth.
The sensations Brenna was feeling were beyond belief. She stopped again. “Is this what love feels like, Zeke?”
He rolled off of her and stared at the canopy of her bed. She immediately felt the loss of his warm body. He seemed to be breathing hard and so was she. “I think we should stop. We’ve got a long day ahead of us.”
“Just a little more. Please.” Brenna was used to getting what she wanted, but she could tell Zeke wasn’t going to give it to her. The hard shaft poking her belly had disappeared and she believed they were done. Zeke sat up and moved across the room to get dressed. Maybe when they made camp for the night he’d kiss her again. She smiled at the thought of it.
Aunt Saundra hurried through the courtyard just as Zeke and Brenna were about to mount their horses.
“Brenna, I didnae wish you to leave without a proper send off. I had hoped that yer Da and brothers would join me in wishing ye farewell, but they indulged too much in the drink last night and none of them are awake.”
“’Tis fine, Aunt. I’m happy you’re here,” Brenna replied, wrapping her aunt in a hug.
“Take care of Brenna,” she said to Zeke. “Or ‘tis me you’ll answer to.”
Zeke smiled reassuringly at her. “Don’t worry. I’ll see to it that she is happy and safe.” He wasn’t lying. He’d keep her safe until they arrived at Breaghacraig and then Dougall would take it from there. As for happy, Brenna would be ecstatic to be away from Castle Treun.
Tears began to form in Saundra’s eyes and Zeke could see Brenna was doing her best not to cry. They stood holding each other’s hands and gazing into each other’s eyes.
He hated to interrupt them, so he gave them a few minutes to finished their goodbyes before saying, “We should go.”
“I’ll miss ye,” Saundra said to Brenna.
“And I’ll miss ye, as well.”
“Ye’ll have a good life with this man.” She dabbed at her eyes with her handkerchief and then gave Brenna one last hug.
Zeke and Brenna mounted their horses and headed for the gate, waving back at Saundra as they departed the courtyard and began their journey to Breaghacraig.
It would take them at least three days to reach their destination. They kept their horses at a walk as they made their way along the trail which was nestled between fields of green and dotted with groves of trees. The sky was blue and filled with white puffy clouds floating leisurely along. They had little conversation, each content to sit with their own thoughts.
Zeke couldn’t believe he’d allowed himself to kiss Brenna like that. If he’d used the brain in his head and not the one between his legs, he’d never have indulged. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy it. On the contrary, he’d enjoyed it very much. She’d been so eager to follow him and he was happy to lead the way, at least until she mentioned the word love. He couldn’t lead Brenna on. He didn’t love her. Being in love again was the furthest thing from his mind. He’d loved Helene and he’d been hurt when she left him, even though he knew it was for the best. His feelings of loss and pain had diminished over time and he thought that he might be ready for love again, but not with Brenna. What he was feeling for her was purely physical. She was, after all, a beauty. A strong, intelligent woman. She was definitely his type and, if things were different, he wouldn’t have minded having her in his arms again, feeling her body pressed against his, tasting her sweet lips. He was going to have to fight that urge because not only was this a fake marriage, but she was innocent and inexperienced. She was trusting him to get her to Breaghacraig and he wouldn’t betray that trust. He’d keep his distance. Yes, they were married, but it was only a temporary thing.
Brenna wanted to talk to Zeke, but he seemed to have retreated into his own thoughts and she didn’t wish to disturb him. She wondered if he had enjoyed their kisses as much as she had. She hoped so, but from the looks of him perhaps not. She watched his face change from serious to thoughtful, to a softer, dreamier look and back to serious once again. It was as if a battle was taking place inside of his head. She’d never met a man like him. He was a mystery to her. She tipped her head as she continued gazing at him. She found that she couldn’t stop herself from looking at him. It made her think about those kisses and the feel of his warm breath on her neck. Goosebumps erupted as she remembered the feel of his hands caressing her, his deep blue eyes staring into hers. She seemed to lose all self-control when she was around him, but she was at a loss as to why. Once again she wondered if this was what love felt like. She had no prior experiences to compare it to and while it was all so very exciting, it also frightened her to think that she might love this man and perhaps he didn’t feel the same way about her. She calmed herself with the knowledge that they had plenty of time to get to know each other better on this trek through the Scottish countryside. She’d be on her best behavior and maybe he would kiss her again. It was all she’d been able to think about since it happened this morning. She snuck another look at him as he rode along beside her and caught him gazing at her. She smiled. He smiled, but then he looked away.
“Is something wrong, Zeke?” she asked.
“No. I’m just thinking,” he replied.
“About what?”
“About getting you safely to Breaghacraig.”
“Are you worried about it?” He must be, otherwise, why say it.
“A little.”
“Why?”
“I can’t put it into words. Don’t concern yourself. There’s no need in both of us worrying.”
“Ye can say that all ye like, but now I am worried.”
“I’m sorry, but you asked.”
Was he being purposely infuriating? “Zeke, I know we’re on the right road. Me brothers have traveled it many times. I went with them once almost half the way. There’s nothing to fear. We’re on MacRae lands until we cross onto MacKenzie lands.”
“I’m not afraid. I was just answering your question.”
Brenna feared she’d wounded his manly pride. “We should stop soon.” She was tired of riding.
Zeke glanced around at their surroundings and then up at the sky. “If you like. The sun will be going down in another hour or so, but we can stop now. If you see someplace that looks like it would make a good camp for the night, let me know.”
He was certainly behaving differently than he had this morning when he had playfully tussled with her on the bed and then gave her a kissing lesson she’d never forget. She wanted that back and thought that stopping for the night might encourage him to relax. Brenna wasn’t sure it would work, but it was worth a try. “Over there.” She pointed out a nice green ar
ea surrounded by brush that would protect them from the wind if need be.
Zeke aimed Olwydd towards it and Brenna followed. He jumped from his horse and then going to Brenna, placed his hands around her waist, easily lifting her from Vala’s back and placing her gently on the ground. An involuntary “Oh,” escaped from her lips. She felt like a young child. The way she had when her Da would swing her in the air. She didn’t wish to be seen as a child any longer, especially not with Zeke.
“I’ll gather firewood and you can get the rest of the camp set up,” Zeke said as he wandered out of her sight.
She had a moment of anxiety when she couldn’t see him anymore. She took a deep breath and calmed herself. She turned in a circle around the campsite and found the perfect place for their bed. She laid out the plaids she’d packed, trying to make it look as inviting as possible. She brought the saddle bags close to where the fire would be and she removed a griddle and some oats, along with some cheese and apples. The apples looked a little wormy, but they could always cut that part off and eat the rest. She was pleased with what she saw when she had finished. This little temporary home she’d created would suit their needs for the night, just as their temporary marriage would serve to get them where they wished to be in another day or two.
Zeke returned to find the camp set up and an area cleared for him to get a fire started.
“Looks good,” he commented.
Brenna smiled warmly at him. Zeke got the fire started and then watched as Brenna created an oat laden bread she called a bannock. They enjoyed it with some cheese, wine, and apples, which filled their bellies.
Brenna retrieved a brush from her saddle bag and returned to the fire where she sat closer to him than felt comfortable. She had been humming happily to herself since they stopped. He didn’t want to disappoint her, but there would be no repeat kisses, no matter how amazing it was. He was starting to like her. He could finally see her good qualities, instead of the unhappy young woman whose only goal was to run away. Taking her away from those circumstances seemed to light her from within, and he felt like he could fall forever into those green-tinged hazel eyes. But he was leaving. Soon. As soon as he could find Sara, they would go back to San Francisco and he would never see her again. His heart hurt at that thought, and he knew he needed to distance himself from her as much as possible after this morning’s mistake. He scooted over a bit and noted Brenna’s look of disappointment when he did. She stopped humming and appeared uncertain.