“Shit,” he said, clenching his hands at his sides. “Sorry for upsetting you, but letting this asshole go makes it dangerous for you and anyone else that comes in contact with him. Just keep that in mind when you decide to let him walk around free—”
“Ian. Enough,” Dani said crossly. She came over to me and eased her arm around my shoulder, guiding me to the couch to sit down. “This is fresh and she’s not ready. You agreed to listen, so let’s just get started with her statement and then we’ll let Lily get some rest.”
Ian walked over and dropped down in my yellow chair. I covered my smile at how odd it looked with him and his black leather briefcase on my pine coffee table. The sci-fi coasters only further enhanced the scene. He pulled out a few legal-sized papers, a recording device, and a camera.
“Most of these are standard consents and agreements to act in case you choose to press charges against the abuser in the future,” Ian said curtly. “I need everything, in your words. The attack as it happened. Sequentially. Any other times he beat you, as well.”
I cringed at his words, as they fed my shame.
“Ian. I’m regretting ever contacting you,” Dani said with irritation in her voice. “You’ve completely embarrassed me.” She turned to me. “I’m sorry, Lily.”
Before I could even respond, he took a breath and said, “I apologize. Again.” Ian leaned forward. “Lily, please look at me.”
I glanced his way.
“I am sorry if what I say hurts you, I’m here to help. It’s just that one of my stepfathers was abusive.” He leaned towards me. “I understand you’re scared, and I promise even though I’m angry, it’s not at you. I’m upset that you were hurt. It’s not your fault. Do you understand?”
I sucked in air and nodded. “Yes. Thank you.”
“Do you need a few minutes?” Dani asked.
I shook my head. “No.”
Taking another breath, I quietly recounted everything that had happened, from the incident a couple of years ago at his house in Chelsea to Declan picking me up from work to Parco’s. It all flowed out of me as if I was speaking of someone else. That happened to the old Lily. I’m going to be the new and improved Lily now. Distancing myself made it easier, until I quieted and looked over at Ian, noticing his mouth was pressed into a thin line.
“Sorry this happened to you, Lily,” Ian said. “Did anyone else see you after you returned to the office?”
“The receptionist, Olivia,” I answered.
“I may contact her for a statement,” Ian said.
“I’ll give my statement now, too,” Dani said.
Ian set his recording device and Dani launched into the text she received from me, and her arrival at my place. I listened as she paused over my deception in telling her I had fallen down. She added some words that were unnecessary, stating that it was common for assault survivors to do so, as if to try to support me in her recount, though I still felt dirty.
After she was finished, Ian turned off his recorder and pulled out a camera. “If you change your mind, I don’t care if it’s in the middle of the night, call me. I’d be more than willing to get the restraining order and report his assault to the police. It’s never too late.” He pulled out his card and placed it down on the coffee table. “I’ll need your number to get the affidavits back for your signature.”
I looked at Dani, who stared at Ian. “You could call me and I’ll bring them over.”
Ian ignored her and pulled out his cellphone, poised to take my number; I felt compelled to give it to him.
“Now, that’s a start,” he said. Standing up, he walked around me and turned up the steel lamp next to him to maximum. He pointed over to the wall that boasted only one framed poster. “Stand over there next to Boba Fett.”
He chuckled and I giggled.
Dani looked at us in puzzlement. “When we met before, Ian mentioned he was a Star Wars fan. Like me.”
“Is he now?” Dani said, smirking at Ian.
“Let’s take the photos,” he said, redirecting the conversation. “Then we’ll leave you for tonight.”
I rose and walked over to where I had been directed, placing my back against the wall while Ian took photos of me. He was speaking, but my mind was too numb for anything to get through. Posing for a picture made it all the more embarrassing. I wanted to be alone and was happy when they were done and packing up their things.
Dani called David soon afterward, and he came up to the apartment with a bag of alternative health remedies for my “physical and mental health” as Dani described them before they left. I put the Chakra cleansing drinks inside my refrigerator, per her instruction, and carried the rest of the items back to my bedroom. I was exhausted, but still sought a shower before I went to bed.
Crossing the hall, I stepped out of my clothes, climbed inside the shower, and turned the water on full blast. I wished I could wash away Declan and all the dirt that seemed to cling to me whenever he crossed my path, and the guilt of using Dani and Ian, Jonas’s best friends, to hide my shame. How low could I possibly get? I disgraced myself, my parents and the Salomé name.
I climbed out and dried my body, then returned to my bedroom to blow-dry my hair. As I was plugging in the hairdryer, I noticed my phone flashing with a new text message. I quickly finished what I was doing, then walked over and checked. My heart skipped a beat as I saw the name flash across the screen. Jonas Crane. I read over his message.
Dani asked me to give you some space and I will, but we’re not finished.
A flutter went through my stomach at the thought of seeing Jonas again. In my heart I wanted Jonas not to be finished with me. Pushing aside my negative thoughts and doubts, I picked up the bag and pulled out the candle and lighter inside of it. Walking over to my windowsill, I placed the candle down and lit the wick. It flared to life, giving the room a warm glow as I turned out the lights and crawled under my duvet. Lying on my side, I watched it blaze strong until I finally fell asleep.
CHAPTER 3
Kisses on my forehead, my cheeks and down to my mouth. I was awake, but pretending to still be asleep. I knew when I opened my eyes I would see his sea blue eyes smiling down at me, along with a smile on his strikingly handsome face.
“Lily, wake up,” he finally said and my eyes popped open. “Jonas.”
“I knew you weren’t asleep,” he mocked. “Time to get up. We only have a half hour for breakfast and to get you to work. You slept in again.”
“Not my fault,” I said. “You kept me up late last night.”
His smile spread into a wide grin.
“You didn’t seem to mind.”
I giggled. “No. I didn’t.” I cupped his face. “Are you going to wake me like this every morning?”
“I have another idea for the rest of the week.”
His eyes took on a mischievous glint. He started kissing a path down the center of my body, pausing at my mound and parting my legs so that he could see the wetness of my arousal. He dragged his tongue through my slit.
“Jonas,” I whispered.
My skin heated as my heart pounded in my chest.
“You’re so beautiful, Lily,” he whispered.
“Come on. This is embarrassing!” I moved to close my legs, but he moved faster, placing his entire mouth over my pussy.
“Oh, Jonas!” I cried out.
“No. Natasha.”
My roommate was in my bedroom, shaking me awake. The lights were on and temporarily blinded my vision. I blinked and rubbed my eyes, getting a full view of Natasha’s face in front of me. Her knowing smirk sealed my embarrassment.
I glared at her. “What are you doing in here?”
Natasha rolled her eyes. “It’s time for our run, silly.” She stepped back and pointed to her black and gold spandex outfit. “If you’d move to Manhattan with me, we could rent a place that has a gym and I wouldn’t need to wake you up to run with me. Think about it.”
“I thought you preferred running outside ove
r the gym?” I said, challenging her logic.
“Whatever,” she said, as if that answered everything. “Your face is still messed up. Put on a pair of sunglasses.”
“Whatever,” I replied, climbing off the bed.
I didn’t fight the early morning run, even though I had only slept for a total of three hours the night before, refusing to take anything to help. Dani’s herbal remedy must be working. I walked over and took a look at myself. The bruises were practically gone. In a few days, it would be like it had never happened. I could move on. But I wasn’t there yet. So for now, I did as instructed and put on a pair of sunglasses.
I quickly pulled my hair into a bun and put my sweat pants, T-shirt, and sneakers on, then I followed her out of the apartment. Today was a new day and a new me.
Today I was determined to push myself harder than I ever had before. I managed to keep Natasha’s pace all the way through downtown and the boardwalk. As we made our way towards our apartment building, I decided to stop at a small shop instead of following her to the end. I dug out the emergency twenty dollars from my pocket and purchased some fat-free yogurt, lettuce, cucumbers and tomatoes, along with Italian dressing. I picked up the Village Voice and Time Out for ideas on what I could do this week, and made my way back to the apartment.
Once there, I ate a yogurt then walked back to the bathroom, where I looked in the mirror and noticed the herbal creams. Turning on the shower, I wondered what would have happened if I hadn’t allowed Dani to find out the truth. I might have been able to keep Jonas and meet him in San Francisco.
I stood under the water and let it beat against my sore muscles, thinking about how things could have been different if I hadn’t sent that text. If I hadn’t felt guilty for lying and had instead just tried to avoid seeing anyone for a few days, I would still have Jonas and his companionship. But now, I was alone again. I dried myself off, picking up my clothing and crossing the hall into my room, where I placed everything in the laundry.
Walking over to my stereo, I turned it on. Paul McCartney and Wings Maybe I’m Amazed. The music filled my room, along with the memories of my first dinner with Jonas at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel. Jonas had remembered me mentioning the music and left the CDs inside a trolley bag he’d gotten me as a gift, since he didn’t like me using my Boston University bag for luggage.
I took a deep breath and changed the station to Beyoncé and Single Ladies filled the room. Yeah. She’s right. If he really liked it, you’d get a commitment. The annoyance blocked my sadness, and I was able to sleep for another two hours before I woke again. How long was this going to last?
I gave up and decided to do some spring-cleaning. I did my laundry and vacuumed my bedroom. This managed to swallow up the morning and most of the afternoon. When I finally sat down on the couch to turn on the TV, the front door buzzed. My pulse sped up. Natasha was off with Ari, so I knew it couldn’t be her now.
“Who is it?” I called out.
“Gregor.”
I frowned and walked over to the door, opening it up. The shocked horror on his face brought my awareness to my bruises.
“What the hell happened to you?” Gregor asked, his voice elevating.
I locked the door behind him. “Why are you here?”
He folded his arms. “It’s the Turner Classic Movie’s Alfred Hitchcock Rebecca night. I know you invited me some time ago. Before everything happened. But…well, I hoped we could talk.” He shook his head. “Hold up. I want to know what happened to your face. It couldn’t be Jonas….”
“No. It wasn’t Jonas.” I motioned for him to follow me to the couch. “It was my ex. But before you tell me what I need to do, Dani has already taken photos. Ian Unger took a statement, and Declan is off to rehab. So it’s over. I’m letting it go.”
Gregor cursed. “Still, why isn’t that asshole in jail?” He took off his coat and slumped down next to me. “I’ll kill that worthless piece of shit. What did Jonas say?”
I licked my lips. “Jonas and I are…We’re not together anymore.”
“Is that why he called and tried to push me to move our presentation up to this week?” Gregor asked.
My eyes widened and my mouth parted. “He can’t do that. We’re not ready.”
Gregor nodded in agreement. “He insisted on your presence. But now that I see you, there is no way I’ll let that happen. Why don’t you take the week off?”
My throat ached. “I can’t do that. You need me to help.”
Gregor shook his head. “No way in hell will I risk Jonas Crane seeing you hurt and working for me, especially after what happened last week…I’m sorry.”
I crossed my arms. Gregor couldn’t bring himself to mention the kiss. He had been drunk, and it wasn’t that big of a deal. But ever since then, he had been avoiding me. “I know. But I need to work right now.”
It’s all I’ve got.
He frowned. “Okay. You can work from home on some of the new business we generated from the conference. For which, you will be happy to know, I will be able to swing a bonus. The raise may come later. Mia and Seth will work the Crane meeting.”
I shook my head. “I should be there to help. When is it?”
He exhaled. “Not telling you, as you’re not invited. And, really, how do you think Jonas will react if I let you work and you’re hurt?”
Gregor shuddered.
I made a face, but inwardly it thrilled me to think about Jonas’s attention and protectiveness of me. However, I didn’t want Jonas fighting with Gregor.
“You’re right, Gregor,” I relented. “It’s better I don’t get involved with the presentation.”
“Good.” Gregor smiled and continued in a soft tone. “Did you have dinner?”
“Yes. I did,” I looked down.
I will after he leaves. So it’s not exactly a lie.
He hesitated, but didn’t challenge me. “Good. I’ll send you some work for the week. I want you home for at least a few days. But if you change your mind, you can take some time off. You won’t lose your job, I promise.” He paused for a moment. “Put some meat on that eye. The bruises are…God. I want to kill him.”
My phone rang and I excused myself to retrieve it from the bedroom. It was a message from Ian.
I’ll be out of town for the next few days, but when I get back I’d like to meet and have you sign papers. How about Thursday after work? We could make it an early dinner?
I bit my lip. The trip I was supposed to be on with Jonas to San Francisco was Thursday, not that I was going.
We didn’t need to meet for dinner. But I didn’t want to be rude, so I conceded.
Okay. But it’ll have to be an early dinner. I have a lot of work to catch up on.
He texted back immediately
Great. I’ll pick you up at Arch Publishing at 5:30 p.m.
I frowned down at my phone. Did Ian think this was a date? And would Gregor let me back at the office by Thursday?
I made my way back to my seat on the couch.
“Jonas?” Gregor wiped his hand across his face.
I shook my head. “Lawyer with papers to sign.”
“Good. I hope you do press charges.”
I smiled weakly. “It’s precautionary. I really just want to move on.”
I pulled my legs up on the couch and turned the TV to Turner Classic Movies. Rebecca would be on in ten minutes.
“He won’t do this again.” I promised. “I have something to put on it and it’s actually better than it was a couple days ago….”
I stopped speaking, as Gregor’s frown deepened. He reached for me and I moved out of his grasp.
Gregor dropped his hand. “I’m not going to lie and say I’m not happy you’ve broken up. I guess I was a little jealous of you with Jonas, after what happened to Maggie. You’re too good for the likes of him. For me too, though I wished things were different for us.”
I lowered my head. I could feel the weight of his stare, but we both knew I did
n’t have the answer he wanted. “I’m not. I don’t think of us….”
“You’ve just been through a lot,” Gregor said. “I just want you to know there are people, including me, that think you’re amazing and deserve the best.” He paused, and I didn’t say anything else, as I had no words for him. He continued, “If you need any help—shopping, rides home, whatever…just let me know. I’ll tell the office building to be on the lookout for Declan, just as a precaution.”
“Thank you,” I said. “I’ll be fine.” I stood and walked over to the kitchen. “Popcorn?” I asked.
“Yes. Popcorn and wine. What a combination,” he said, rising and following me.
He took the opener I handed him and uncorked the bottle of Merlot he had brought with him, pouring a glass for each of us.
We settled back down on the couch and watched the movie, laughing and heckling together. I swooned over Laurence Olivier and he swooned over Joan Fontaine. I smiled at the normalcy of it. Though my mind wondered what Jonas might be up to tonight, I delighted in the somewhat ease Gregor and I shared despite his declaration of feelings. Our movie nights were always enjoyable and I did indeed feel better, but I missed the close friendship I shared with my friend Mary. Perhaps going away for a few days to visit her in Boston would be just the thing I needed to get my head back together.
After a few hours, Gregor left. I returned to the bedroom, unable to still my mind enough to sleep. I started doing crunches, lunges, and running in place until I stopped in exhaustion. I then took a shower and fell face first into my bed, finally able to keep my eyes closed.
I could protect my heart while I was awake, but my dreams were unguarded. They swept me right back to Jonas, where I truly longed to be.
CHAPTER 4
The number glowing on the display of my desk phone forced me to suck in a breath Declan. I pressed the mute button to avoid the incessant rings, each one alerting my office colleagues to the fact that I was ignoring calls.
The walls were high enough to give a semblance of privacy, but close enough that I knew what was going on across and next to me. For instance, Margie, who occupied the desk across from me, had a sore throat from her “spirited rendition” of Madonna’s Express Yourself at karaoke yesterday. And Mark, next to me, had a “secret crush” on my boss Gregor and Seth from Marketing. I could only imagine what they’d learned about me this week, since I’d decided after a couple of days I couldn’t take working from home and came back to Arch.
Tiger Lily: Part Two Page 2