by Maisey Yates
So sleeping with him would destroy absolutely nothing. They had no chance at a relationship anyway. She didn’t even want one with him.
Her realization almost made her dizzy.
Except, she wasn’t really the sort of woman who would sleep with a guy she knew she wasn’t going to end up with. Was she?
But she also couldn’t see ever trusting someone enough to have an actual relationship. And she knew she didn’t want to be used for her money, and guys that were just after her for what she could buy them? Those guys were easy to deny. They were ineffective and basically sexless in her eyes.
But Ferro? Ferro didn’t want her money. If he wanted to sleep with her then he would at the very least really want her and not just her status.
Heck, her status meant nothing to him. And anyway, they were already using each other to get a business deal, sans sex, so the using would be physical using, which, as long as she went into it eyes wide-open…
Her mother would be so disappointed in her.
She bit her lip. She’d been taught to treat her body, sex, like it was special.
But Her mother had paid for the date who had tried to take her virginity from her. Who had ruined, yeah, she would admit it, the way she saw sex for a really long time. So what did it matter? Her mother had never known what was best for her.
All that aside, what did she have to lose? She was hardly wife and mother material anyway. Maybe, for her, a steamy affair would be the best she could do.
An affair with her enemy. Now why did that excite her more than it repelled her?
She looked up when a man sat down at her table. Blond, handsome. Not handsome in the same devastating way as Ferro, but not unpleasant, either. Maybe that was the answer. Another man. A more sensible man. And they were in public, safe. Maybe he would be a more sensible choice. A man who could answer this sensual need she seemed to be developing but who wasn’t quite as full-on as Ferro.
And, you know, not someone she classified as an enemy.
“Hi,” she said, smiling, tilting her head to the side and trying to look flirtatious. She’d seen other women do it, she thought she should be able to pull it off. Plus, her boobs looked really good in the dress she was wearing which, really should help capture attention.
“Hi. Julia Anderson, right?”
“Yes,” she said. She didn’t feel breathless, but she tried to sound it because she was pretty sure men liked that. “And you are?”
“David Brown. I saw you sitting here and just had to come over.”
She lifted her shoulder and pushed her arm in, drawing a little attention to her assets. “Really? That’s so nice.”
“I have a product idea that I have to pitch to you.”
After that, her brain just sort of shut down while David, who was looking less and less handsome, started pitching some half-thought-out idea that didn’t have any basis in current technology, or clearly any understanding of how computers worked. Or any idea that walking up to a woman at a wedding and making a business presentation to her was an automatic no.
She was pretty sure when he finished, she shook his hand and thanked him, smiling and pretending like she wasn’t dying inside.
She was so sick of it. Of the fact that when she was no one, no men talked to her. Because she was gangly and liked computers more than she liked going out. And that now she had money and status good-looking men approached her frequently. That people were nice. That they treated her with deference because she had power.
That they were all liars. That she couldn’t trust anything they said, anything they did. Ferro was a bastard, but he was honest. He wasn’t the kind of guy to act charming until he got you alone.
And there was actually a lot to be said about that.
She looked around the room, around the amazing setting. Would she have been friends with this couple if not for her status? If she didn’t buy people the best rooms in the hotel, would they still want her around?
One thing was certain. If she couldn’t throw money at them, she would have to give something of herself. Open herself up to them. And she didn’t like that idea at all.
Ferro didn’t like her much, he didn’t pretend to. He didn’t want to know her, but he might just want to sleep with her. And she could handle that. At least it was clear-cut. At least it was honest.
Right now she would rather have his brutal honesty than a smile from a sycophant.
An affair with her enemy was sounding less and less stupid.
“You aren’t supposed to wear black to weddings.”
Ferro approached Julia at the reception, a glass of champagne in hand. He’d come in just as the ceremony was starting, after doing some business with China.
Julia turned and his stomach tightened, blood rushing hot and fast through his veins. And he felt it, strong and sure, arousal.
“I have permission,” she said, smiling, her teeth a flash of white against the crimson of her lipstick.
Her blond hair was styled in soft waves, the black dress a simple silhouette that clung tight to her hips and flared out like a bell at her knees, falling softly to the ground from there. But it was the neckline, a plunging V in the front and back, that had his attention.
Her breasts were small, but perfectly formed. And he found himself wondering about them to the point of obsession. Was it due to so many years when his own fantasies had to stay locked inside of himself while he catered to others? So many years spent suppressing desire so he didn’t have to deal with past memories? Was that why it was so strong? Or was it simply Julia?
Forbidden fruit. A temptation he never thought he would be vulnerable to.
Because he had been that for other people and there was no satisfaction there for the object of that kind of lust. It was a selfish desire. It used the other party, until there was nothing left of them. Until they were cold inside.
Unless he made it his mission to satisfy her. No.
He would not do it. He was stained by his past, every penny he’d ever spent, every penny multiplied, coming from his deepest shame. His entire empire had been built on his back, in a near literal sense. He wouldn’t bring it all back. He wouldn’t.
He hated the rumors. That he had seduced wealthy older women out of their fortunes. But he hated the truth more. That he had been their toy. That he had been bought. That his company was built that way. That his legacy was that of a man who had sold cheaply what should only be given.
So he looked away from her figure. Looked at her eyes. Blue. Clear. Reflecting everything he was starting to think she was: innocence. Goodness. All that armor to cover the sweet and vulnerable that was in her.
“Special permission for the wedding’s benefactor?” he asked, handing her the flute of champagne.
She took it, lifted it to her lips, then lowered it. “I’m hardly the benefactor,” she said.
“You paid for everyone’s accommodations. And you also pay the bride’s salary.”
“I don’t give her money for nothing. She’s a darn fine programmer.”
“Do you know all of your employees?”
She shrugged one bare shoulder. “Not all of them. At a company the size of mine, that’s impossible, but then, you know that.”
“I barely know one of mine. Not below a certain tier,” he said.
“How is that possible?”
“I’m not the kind of boss who does walk-throughs of the office and team meetings and wilderness camping trips where we do trust exercises.”
“Oh. I am. I mean, I’ve done those things,” she said.
“Yes, you are a very…you are a nice person.”
“Thank you,” she said. “You say that like you’re surprised.”
“I don’t know very many nice people.”
“Maybe I’m not that nice, Ferro.”
“Why do you say that?”
“I don’t know. I mean, I guess I’m generous. With money. But not with me. Yeah, I walk through the halls of the office building and I tel
l everyone good game. I come to their wedding and I buy expensive gifts. But money is so easy to give. It’s a lot harder to give you. To give real friendship.”
“You want people to use you for your money,” he said, the words slipping out.
“I never thought of it that way, but I suppose it’s what I earn, since it’s all I give. Still, human nature being the fickle, hypocritical thing it is, I’ve never cared for being used for my money when I was…trying to make a connection.”
“And men do that to you?”
“Yeah. There are a lot of beautiful women in the world, Ferro, much more beautiful than I am. But there are no women with more money than me. So…doesn’t take a genius to figure out why guys are attracted to me, suddenly.”
“Any man who looks at you and only sees a bank balance is an idiot. How could anyone miss how truly amazing and unique you are?”
Her eyes rounded, his compliment hitting its mark. Except, it had been genuine. He wasn’t trying to seduce. Wasn’t trying to play. Still the words had come out and he knew they had worked. They were drawing her in.
If you want her, you can have her. No. He wouldn’t.
Still, the temptation burned so hot he was nearly consumed with it. To know what it would be like to take everything he wanted. To explore all her softness. Her innocence.
That was the true shame. It was her innocence, his desire to tear off her armor and expose all that soft sweetness, that called to him and it was those very things that should keep him from ever touching her.
And yet, were she another woman, more jaded, more purposefully seductive, he doubted he would have felt a thing.
It was her differences. The very things that made her forbidden. That was what made her call to him.
“You really think they’re missing something?” she asked.
“Yes,” he said, knowing he should stop. Knowing he should cut her down as effectively as he’d just built her up. Something to get her to stop looking at him with those round blue eyes. Looking at him like he was some kind of hero.
“How can everyone have missed it, Ferro?” she asked. “What is it about me? I don’t really go out of my way to hide the good things about myself. Why does everyone see something wrong with me? Why do people just want to take things from me?”
“The truth? I think you’re too smart for most people. You’re intimidating. And it’s clear you wouldn’t be able to connect with someone who isn’t somewhat exceptional. You’re a challenge, and that frightens some men. Or…makes them want to subdue it.” She flinched when he said that. “Also, I think you don’t really want any of the men who haven’t shown interest in you. I think you’re more in control than you think.”
“Do you?”
“You’re the kind of woman who knows how to go out and get what she wants. A billionaire before age twenty-one, a leader in the technology industry. An amazing feat for your age. Nearly unheard of for your gender. I think you’re in much more control than you give yourself credit for.”
Julia looked down into her champagne, and back up at Ferro. He was impeccably dressed, the lines of the custom suit skimming his physique, a physique she’d seen quite a lot of this morning. Ferro did a good impression of a man who was civilized, and yet, she knew he wasn’t. Not really.
She’d seen beneath the suit this morning. And she was more than a little intrigued.
And he thought she had more control than she gave herself credit for. What would happen if she tried to seduce Ferro? If she went for what she wanted?
He wanted her, too. Well, maybe he did. He had kissed her like he was drowning and she was air back in California, and he’d said that those who didn’t see why she was special were stupid. Which meant he had to think she was.
That was even beside the point. She didn’t need for him to think she was special, she just needed him to want her.
She was ridiculous. A twenty-five-year-old virgin letting so many fears and insecurities hold her back. He was right. Her armor was total bull. She was still just living in fear, living to protect. She wasn’t fortified by her image. She was hiding behind it.
But if she was with Ferro…she could break through the wall. This one big wall of fear that surrounded her. And he would make it crumble. Because Ferro Calvaresi was a master of the game. The kind of man who made women lose their minds for a chance to have his body.
There was a thought.
If you wanted to learn about a subject, you learned from a master. That was just common sense. So if she wanted to learn about sex…
She took a drink of her champagne. Fortification. Much needed. Then she took a step toward him and put her hand on his arm. “And do you like women who are in control?” she asked, going for a sultry tone, though she was pretty sure she sounded a little raspy.
Something in his eyes changed. Darkened. “No.”
“Oh.”
“I like to be in control.”
Something about the way he said it, his voice smooth and rich, melting through her like warm chocolate, made her shiver. Opened up a craving in her that shocked her with its strength.
“Well, that’s…that’s too bad since…since you think I’m in control. But you like to be.” She was botching the seduction. She should have known she would be lame at seduction.
And it sucked because she really did want him. Right now, she wanted him so bad that she ached with it. It was a new and terrifying experience. But it seemed…it seemed like she could do it, too.
With Ferro there would be no feelings, but there would be no games, either. There would be no demands, no force. He wouldn’t trust her, he wouldn’t ask her to trust him. They Could give each other pleasure and then…and then go back to how things were.
“Could you…” She hesitated and then took a breath, plunging on. “Could you come out onto the balcony with me?”
“Looking for a repeat performance of our balcony visit in California?”
“If I was?”
“Are there reporters?”
“Probably.”
He held his arm up and she curved hers around it, allowing him to lead her through the room and out onto the wooden terrace. Lanterns hung low in even intervals, casting glowing orbs out onto the lake below.
She took a breath and released it, watching as it lingered in the air, her eyes on the stars. So many stars. More than she’d ever seen before. This place was different. Wild. And she felt different and wild in it.
She turned to Ferro and put her hand on his face, searching his expression for clues. There was nothing there. He was stone. Unreadable, unknowable.
But she wasn’t going to wait for his cue. She was going to give her own. And exercise that control thing he seemed to think she had.
She put her other hand on the back of his neck, lacing her fingers through his hair. And then she closed her eyes, because looking at him didn’t help, he was too handsome to be real, and leaned in, pressing her lips to his.
They were warm, firm. Immobile. So she changed the angle of her head, touched the seam of his mouth with the tip of her tongue.
And then he moved, his arm sliding slowly around her waist, drawing her in tight, crushing her breasts to his chest. He held her there, letting her kiss him, not returning it, not denying it.
“Kiss me,” she said, her lips still pressed to his.
And for a moment, a blinding, blistering moment, he obeyed. His mouth moved over hers, so expert, so incredibly skilled. A shiver went through her body, arousal skating over her skin. The damp slide of his tongue creating an answering wetness between her thighs.
Oh, yes, she wanted him. She wanted him to show her everything she’d been missing.
Then he pulled away suddenly and the air, hitting her where his body had been before, left her chilled.
“What?” she asked.
“Nothing. But that’s quite enough of a public display, don’t you think?” He was breathing hard, she noticed, something he had not done after their kiss in Californi
a. And his face looked slightly flushed, hard to tell in the dim light, but she was sure she could see a faint slash of crimson across his sharp cheekbones.
Two things were suddenly apparent to her: he was aroused now. And the first time they kissed he hadn’t been.
She wasn’t totally sure what to feel about either thing.
“I suppose so,” she said. Her own breathing was totally erratic, her heart pounding unevenly. And her legs were shaking.
He turned away from her and walked to the edge of the balcony, leaning down against the railing, his forearms resting on the rough-hewn wood.
She followed him, coming to stand next to him. “I want you,” she said, the words coming out in a rush.
He didn’t react, didn’t move or look at her or anything. He simply stared out at the water.
“Ferro…I—I’m not asking for anything outside of this deal we have. I just want you. In bed. Until all of this is over, and then you walk away with what you want, and I walk away with what I want.”
“A business transaction,” he said, his tone hard and flat.
“Yes. What’s wrong with that?” He straightened. “I find I have no taste for things like this.”
Hurt burned through her. Was it possible she’d misread him? That he didn’t want her at all? The humiliation was a lot worse than she’d imagined it would be. Yeah, a lot worse. She just felt small all of a sudden. The awkward girl she’d always been.
But of course, she had nothing material to offer Ferro outside of the agreement they already had. So why would he even humor her?
“I’m sorry you find me so distasteful,” she said crisply. And the hurt, anger, pent up from the past ten years of her life, and from her ridiculous encounter, earlier, with David Whatshisname and Ferro’s rejection, built up and boiled over, words spilling out hot and reckless. “Should I have offered you money? Is that an exchange you understand?”