by Paula Kay
Or they’d go their separate ways for a while, something Isabella felt a little unsure about. She’d grown so close to Jemma and they traveled so well together, but she also realized that traveling alone might help her to grow in ways that she hadn’t yet.
Originally, she’d thought that Thomas might be joining them, but his trip seemed to have stalled out in London—at least for the time being. Isabella sighed as she picked up her phone to check her messages again.
“No word yet?” Jemma stood in Isabella’s doorway.
Isabella shook her head. “Nope.”
“Maybe you should text him. Does he know we’re leaving in the morning?”
“He knows.” Isabella put down the sweater she was folding. “Jem, I feel sick about it all. And honestly, I’m starting to get pretty angry with him—the more time that goes by today. And I don’t want to leave London being angry with Thomas. What a mess.”
Jemma looked thoughtful. “The timing does stink and I’d be shocked if you don’t hear from him, but—”
Isabella jumped as her phone buzzed with a text on her dresser. She crossed the room to pick it up, reading the note from Thomas.
Can you meet me at the diner in 30 minutes? Sorry for the late notice.
Before she could think too much about it, she sent off her reply.
Sure. See you in 30.
“Thomas, I take it?”
“Yep, he wants me to meet him in thirty minutes, so I gotta run. I doubt I’ll be long.”
Isabella walked to the hall closet to get her coat and hat, pulling them on quickly with Jemma following behind her. She turned toward her before stepping out into the hallway. “At this point, I just want to get this over with—make sure everything is okay between us. Wish me luck?”
Jemma leaned in to give her a quick hug. “Everything’s going to be fine. Just be honest with him—about your feelings, I mean. And good luck.”
Isabella stepped outside, enjoying the cool air as it hit her face. She had a few minutes, so she decided to walk a few blocks to another tube stop, trusting that it would help her to clear her head a little bit.
What was she feeling about Thomas? About the kiss?
She’d tossed and turned all night long, replaying it in her mind over and over again. She wouldn’t lie to herself about it, but she didn’t want to get solely caught up in the emotions of it either. Nothing had changed in terms of her not wanting to risk her friendship with Thomas, but had they already crossed a line that they couldn’t step back from?
She shook her head as if it would help her to make sense of all the thoughts scattered in her mind. She couldn’t think about it any more. Not until she was face-to-face with him.
When Isabella saw Thomas sitting in the diner twenty minutes later, she felt both relieved and anxious. He smiled at her as he stood, his grin as wide as ever, but there was something different about the way he hugged her. He was tense. She could feel it in his body.
“Hey, you. How’s the packing going? Are you all ready for tomorrow?”
She nodded. “Making progress, but I still have a bit more to do.”
Their eyes met across the table.
“Well, I won’t keep you too long. I’ve got somewhere to be tonight as well.”
The words cut her. She wanted Thomas to be with her—she wanted him to take her in his arms and offer to come sit with her while she packed. She wanted him to come to Italy with her or to make her promise that she’d come back here to him. She wanted all of that, but in response to his comment, she only nodded. More important than that whole fantasy was the fact that she didn’t want to lose her best friend.
They ordered sodas and fries, in agreement that neither of them was hungry for more than that.
Isabella played with the wrapper from her straw, willing Thomas to talk. She’d lost all ability to be able to have any kind of normal conversation with him as she watched him across the table from her.
“So, Iz—about last night.”
“Mm-hm.”
“I really don’t know what came over me. When you showed me your book, I was just—I dunno—overcome with emotion, I guess. I’m so proud of you and how far you’ve come. And the dress you were wearing—the way you looked last night. I’m still trying to make sense of it all, if I’m being honest.”
“Thomas, what does that mean exactly? I don’t know if you just go around kissing friends that you feel proud of like that.” She laughed lightly, not wanting to make the conversation any more uncomfortable than it already was.
Thomas seemed to be struggling a bit to answer her, and for a minute Isabella just wanted to shake it all off, making everything normal again between them. But could things ever be normal again? She sighed and Thomas looked over at her intently.
“What, Iz? What are you thinking? Are you mad at me? For being so impulsive?”
She thought about it for a second before answering him—his choice of words. It had been impulsive. She believed that he’d had no intention of kissing her last night before it had actually happened.
She studied him for a moment. He looked so unsure of himself, so uncomfortable. She hated this. She wouldn’t leave things like this. Their friendship meant too much to her. If he wanted to just sweep everything under the rug, then she’d do so now. Hopefully things could go back to normal, but all they could do was try at this point.
“Look, Thomas. I’m not mad at you. If anything, I’m mad at myself. It shouldn’t have happened, period. It did—for whatever reason—and hopefully we can just forget about it and move on. It seems like neither of us wants to jeopardize our friendship and I know you’re trying to figure things out with Natasha, so that’s that.” She smiled at him—mostly fake, but also willing herself to accept everything she’d just said out loud herself.
She certainly felt resolute with the things she was saying. She had other things to do, family to get ready to see. She’d spent too much time working on herself and figuring out what she wanted in her life to let this be a huge stumbling block for her.
“Thomas? Why don’t you look happy?” She laughed and flicked his arm across the table. “Everything is fine. I’m going to Tuscany tomorrow, it’s the holidays, it’s a time to be merry, right?” She flashed him her biggest grin and somewhere inside of her she started to believe that everything really was going to be just fine, that they’d recover from the mistake they’d made the night before.
Thomas was looking at her, a smile finally making its way back to his face. “You’re really something, you know, Iz. I do know one thing for sure.”
“What’s that?”
“You’re the best friend I’ve ever had. I don’t want to lose that. Not ever.”
“Well, good. Don’t do anything to make me hate you and that probably will never happen.” Isabella took a big last drink from her soda and grabbed a couple of the last fries. “Now, let’s get our bill. I gotta get the show on the road with my packing.”
They left the diner, Thomas paying the bill while Isabella waited for him outside.
“I’ll walk you to the tube.”
“Its just across the street.” She winked at him. “Go home. Everything’s cool. I promise.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, of course I’m sure.” And she was sure. She’d already pushed everything aside, compartmentalizing it all in her brain so that she could move on and get done what she had to get done the rest of the day. “Have a great Christmas, Thomas. Give Natasha my best.”
Thomas reached over to give her a big hug and she felt his hands on her hair as he squeezed her to him. “I really do adore you, you know.”
She pulled her head back so that she could look him in the eye. “Oh, I know you do.” She laughed at the expression on his face. “And I adore you too, you big goofball.”
“Merry Christmas, Iz. Have a great time with your family. Let’s plan to video chat, okay?”
“Of course. See you later.” She smiled at him one last time and t
hen crossed the street to the tube.
As she stood at the top of the steps, she looked over to see Thomas still standing on the sidewalk looking at her. She waved, wondering if it would be the last time in a long while that she’d see him.
Chapter 34
Isabella leaned her seat back, turning her head to look out the window. She really was getting to be a pro with the whole flying thing. She smiled, remembering how scared she’d been the first time that she’d gotten on the plane with Douglas so long ago. She still couldn’t believe that he’d gone all the way to Connecticut to get her, to bring her to be with them all in Tuscany. She didn’t understand until she met him why her mother’s lawyer would go through all that trouble—but he hadn’t been just Arianna’s lawyer at all, he’d been part of the family—part of her family now.
She jumped slightly when she felt Jemma’s hand on her arm.
“Bella, are you okay?”
She turned her head to look at Jemma sitting beside her. “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”
“Well, because you’ve not said a word to me about how things went with Thomas at the diner yesterday. I don’t want to pry, but you know I’m dying to find out.”
Isabella had told Jemma that she didn’t want to talk about it—about Thomas—when she’d gotten back from the diner the night before. She’d had too much to do and too many other things to think about. They’d spent the rest of the night packing and enjoying a final late dinner at one of their favorite neighborhood restaurants, talking about seeing everyone in Italy and ideas that they had about their future travel plans.
It had been the perfect way to end their final night in London, a perfect way for Isabella to move forward with good memories and the promise of leaving any mistakes behind her when she left.
“Sorry about last night, Jem. And thanks for giving me some space about the whole thing.”
“Of course.”
“Everything is fine between Thomas and me.”
“Okay. Fine as in we’re still best friends or fine as in he’s breaking up with Natasha to finally be with who he’s supposed to be with?” Jemma laughed.
“Jem, don’t. Please.” Isabella really needed for Jemma to get what she was saying in order to move on from everything. “It’s really okay. I don’t know if Thomas is going to end up with Natasha—in the long run, I mean. I don’t think he has a clue about that either. But both of us believe that our friendship is the most important thing—that the accidental kiss was basically a huge mistake and one that we need to forget about.”
“Bella!” The look on Jemma’s face was one of shock.
“What?”
“The accidental kiss. Come on. I was there. That kiss was no accident. You’re both kidding yourself if you’re saying that there wasn’t something to that kiss.”
Isabella breathed in deeply. It was going to be difficult to get over it, unless she had the full support of Jemma. She certainly didn’t need Jemma reminding her about her own doubts and she really did have to move on—for the sake of her own sanity. She turned in her seat so that she could face Jemma—look her in the eyes.
“Please listen to me, okay?”
Jemma nodded and Isabella guessed that she was fighting the urge to say a lot more.
“I really need to get over this idea that there’s anything other than friendship between me and Thomas. If you want me to have any hope of ever falling in love myself, you’ll help me in this and not make it harder for me, okay? Jem?”
“Okay. Of course I don’t want to not be supportive. You know I want you to be happy and of course that includes love. I’m all for that. I just don’t want you to make a mistake, you know?”
“I know, but that’s what I’m saying. Thomas and I both think that what happened the other night was a mistake. Now we just gotta make things right again.”
“Okay. If you say so.”
“It’s alright if you don’t agree with me, but please can we stop talking about it? I really do want to move on.” Isabella hesitated for a moment before reaching for her mother’s leather journal that she’d stuck in her seat pocket. She opened it to one of the letters that Arianna had written to her—the one about the things that her mother had wanted for her. “Here. Read this.” Isabella handed the journal to Jemma, and then watched her face as she read it.
Jemma glanced at Isabella and then read a section of the letter out loud. “‘I want you to always have hope within your heart—to know that no matter what the past holds or who you were yesterday, your future can be whatever you imagine it to be. What are your hopes and dreams, Bella? Do you know?’” Jemma stopped reading to look over at her. “Wow. I can almost hear Ari asking those questions.”
Isabella nodded. “I know. Me too, even though I’ve never heard her speak. I feel like her letters are guiding me in a way. I’m not sure if that sounds weird.”
“Like the map.” Jemma was grinning at her. “I think Ari would love that. It’s kinda like she left a treasure map for you of sorts—all these new places you’re going and being able to read these letters of advice from her. I think it’s pretty cool that she did that for you.”
“I do too, and you know what?”
“What?”
“It does help me. Rereading her words to me again is helping to put everything into perspective—about what’s important as it pertains to me and my family, but also in regards to my relationship with Thomas.”
Jemma looked thoughtful. “And do you know? What your hopes are? That’s a loaded question, huh?”
Isabella nodded. “I’m not sure that I’m supposed to know that now—at our age, I mean. But I feel like I’m getting a better idea of it. I think my writing is part of that. And I do feel really hopeful. The stuff with Thomas isn’t going to change that. I won’t let it. And eventually I’ll find love like what my mother described in the letter too. But I’m okay waiting for that, you know?”
Jemma nodded. “Yes, I do know. I’m okay waiting for that myself—for the right one.”
Isabella was well aware of Jemma’s past boyfriend and everything bad that had happened between them—and also all the ways that Jemma had changed since that relationship.
“Well, you deserve someone amazing. That’s for sure. And there’s a lot happening right now—a lot of good thing, right?” Isabella grinned. “We’re gonna see everyone in just a few hours, and I can’t wait until Christmas. I feel like Christmas in Tuscany is going to be magical, you know? I’ve not had that yet—with everyone, I mean. And I just want to enjoy it—to celebrate with everyone that I love.”
Jemma grinned back at her. “Alright then. I won’t say another word about what happened between you and Thomas. I hear you loud and clear. If you do want to talk about it—about anything—you know I’m always here for you.”
“I know. And thank you for that.”
“And yes. We all have a lot to celebrate this Christmas—the most important thing being the fact that it’s our first Christmas with you. Everyone is beyond excited about it. I talked to Lia and Gigi yesterday and—well, let’s just say that Gigi warned me that Lia may have gone a little overboard with the preparations.”
Isabella laughed. “I really can’t wait.”
“And your book, Bella. Everyone is going to be so excited and so incredibly proud of you.”
“My book and your paintings. We’ve been quite busy since we saw them last, huh?”
Jemma nodded. “And on that note, I’m gonna take a little nap. With all the packing and trip preparations, suddenly I’m feeling exhausted.”
“Me too.” Isabella reclined her seat and as she put her head back against it, she thought again about Arianna’s letters to her and how far she’d come since she’d first read her mother’s journal.
She smiled, releasing the final remnants of worry about Thomas, her book, her future—everything that she’d been hanging on to for the past few weeks. In its place she allowed herself to be filled with all the hope that her mother had ever want
ed for her.
Yes, there was certainly a lot to be hopeful for, starting with this Christmas reunion in Tuscany.
A Map for Bella
(Book 2)
Bella’s Holiday
By
Paula Kay
Copyright © 2015 Paula Kay
Cover design by Beetiful Book Covers
All rights reserved.
PaulaKayBooks.com
Chapter 1
Lia looked across the table at her granddaughter. She couldn’t really put her finger on it, but Isabella seemed different somehow. She was smiling and chatting away, but Lia could tell that something wasn’t quite right. She reached across the table to place her hand on Isabella’s arm.
“Honey, is everything okay?”
Isabella looked confused. “Yeah. Everything’s great, why?”
“Oh, I just sense that there’s something bothering you. Bella, you know you can talk to me, right?”
Isabella smiled. “Of course. Yes, I do know that and yes, everything is just fine. You have no idea how wonderful it is to be here—sitting in Thyme with you. The restaurant looks great and the food is perfect as usual.” Isabella scooped up a forkful of pasta, as if she needed to prove her point.
“Alright then. If you say so. I don’t want to nag at all. And you have no idea how wonderful it’s going to be to have a house full of people this year for Christmas.”
“The villa looks so festive with all the Christmas decorations. Antonio told me how hard you’ve been working at it all, and I really hope you’re not overextending yourself. I mean, I’m sure the restaurant must have you pretty busy this time of year. And now Jemma and I are here to help.” Isabella grinned.